**6 Years Ago**

 

*riiiiing riiiiiiing riiiiiing*

 

Once the lunch bell rang, everyone shot out of their desks and ran to the cafeteria like animals during feeding time. 12 year old Kim Taeyeon remained in the empty room by herself. During the beginning of the year, Taeyeon felt that the eerie silence of the classroom was very creepy when she ate her lunch, but eventually she got used to it.

 

It was a slightly chilly January afternoon as today was the first day back from winter break. Taeyeon placed her notebook into her backpack and pulled out the readymade lunch her mom prepared for her the night before.

 

Taeyeon thought that by middle school, she would start fresh and try to become more social. Sadly, the first day of middle school was just as awkward as elementary school and Taeyeon thought it best if she just stayed away from other kids. It’s not like she would fit in with them. They were just too…. different. The guys were all idiots and most of the girls were chasing after the idiots.

 

Taeyeon didn’t really understand the kids in her class, but maybe that’s why she had a hard time talking with them. Chewing on the dried salty chicken, Taeyeon also felt that it was hard to tell her mom the truth that her cooking needed some work. Taeyeon closed her lunch box and put it away while she pulled out a sandwich she bought while walking to school this morning.

 

I know Eomma tries to cheer me up sometimes with her homemade lunches, but if I attempt to eat her cooked cardboard chicken, it might kill me. Or worse, it could stunt my growth.

 

While sitting on her desk, Taeyeon took a small bite of her ham sandwich and stared outside the window overlooking the courtyard. She could see groups of kids sharing each other’s lunch while laughing and slapping each other on the back. A group of girls were all giggling at a gossip magazine while a bunch of guys were pretending to wrestle with each other like on TV.

 

They all seem like they’re having fun.

 

It’s not like Taeyeon never tried to make friends, it just never went smoothly. Taeyeon didn’t like to gossip about cute boys or talk about fashion. At the same time she couldn’t relate anything to the boys and preferred to stay away from them. It would have been nice to talk and laugh with a group of friends. To tell secrets and to let them know that you’re always there for them. Just like in the TV show or the movies, Taeyeon wished she could experience a relationship like that.

 

*knock knock*

 

Taeyeon turned her head and noticed a short brunette girl knocking on the metal door frame. She looked new since Taeyeon has never seen her before. She shyly scratched her head and she walked towards Taeyeon.

 

“Excuse me, is this room 6C? I just transferred today and I kind of overslept, hehe.”

 

Taeyeon hopped off of her desk as the shy brunette was only a few feet away. The first thing Taeyeon noticed was that this girl was almost the same height with her. Aside from her mom, this is the first time she’s seen someone as short, if not shorter, than her. Even though it was a spectacle, Taeyeon caught herself staring at the curious brunette.

 

“Oh umm… Yeah this is 6C, but as you already know you came pretty late. It’s already lunch time.”

 

“Well that explains the empty room then.”

 

The brunette started to look around the room and tapped her fingers on her skirt while Taeyeon just felt awkward holding her sandwich in her right hand.

 

“You know, since it’s lunch time you can go to the cafeteria and get something to eat. Class won’t start for another hour.”

 

“Oh? If that’s so, then why aren’t you in the cafeteria with everyone else? Did you get in trouble?”

 

“Umm…” Taeyeon was taken aback for a bit. It was the first time anyone questioned her being in the classroom alone.

 

“I have late homework to do, so I’m just staying here for lunch.”

 

“If that’s the case, then you could’ve just gone to the library and did homework with the other students.

 

“W-well it’s a solo assignment so I just-”

 

“-and if you were doing your homework, how come there are no papers and books on your desk? If I remember correctly, you were just sitting on your desk staring outside when I came in.”

 

Who the hell was this girl? Why was she so curious about someone else’s business?

 

“Well maybe I was just taking a bre-”

 

“-and I was able to email the teacher before coming to class. She didn’t assign any homework during winter break and no new assignments were issued before then, so no one should be worrying about homework until the end of the week.”

The tiny brunette gave a proud smile as Taeyeon’s mouth was slightly opened from the new girl’s explanation.

 

“Now if you want you can keep this lie going, or you can just tell me why you’re here. So which is it?”

 

Feeling her legs getting a little weak, Taeyeon grabbed the edge of her desk behind her. This was the first time anyone questioned Taeyeon’s actions. Even the teachers didn’t give her a second glance when they saw Taeyeon eating alone.

 

“You know instead of interrogating me, you should just go to the courtyard with everyone else.”

 

Taeyeon slowly sat back down in her seat and continued to munch on her sandwich without making eye contact with the shorter girl.

 

“Well maybe I don’t want to talk to other people. Maybe I want to stay in this classroom and stare outside the window too. It’s a free country, so I can do whatever I want.” The brunette showed another proud smile as she sat in the desk next to Taeyeon.

 

“Look, no offense but I prefer to eat alone. Happy?” Taeyeon continued to direct her eyes forward, not daring to look at the grinning girl next to her.

 

“Come on now, I just transferred today and you’re treating me like a bag of rotten tomatoes. You can at least ask me for my name.”

 

Letting out a sigh, Taeyeon tossed her sandwich on her desk and turned her head towards the new girl.

 

“Okay so tell me. What’s your name?”

 

“Why thank you for asking! My name is Lee Sunkyu, but all my friends call me Sunny.”

 

“Well…. Sunkyu, my name is Kim Taeyeon. My friend’s don’t call me anything. This was nice but I think you’d have more fun if you talked to the other girls in the cafeteria. They would probably love to talk to you since you’re new here.” Taeyeon rolled her eyes as she turned her attention back to her sandwich.

 

Sunkyu stood up and walked towards the window and glanced down at the happy students playing around. Looking back at Taeyeon, she gave out a slightly amused smile and leaned towards Taeyeon.

 

“You know if you want to make friends, you’re going to have to open up first.”

 

Taeyeon was taken aback. “What?”

 

“I said that if you want to make friends, you have to be friendly. Meaning you have to open up and talk to people.”

 

“I-I-I don’t know what you’re talking about” Taeyeon started to blush as Sunkyu was staring intently at her.

 

“I think you do. Let me take a guess about you. You’re a nice girl. You always try to make people happy. Problem is you’re not that good at socializing. You tried to open up to people, but you had no experience and they thought you were weird. After a while you just gave up and started to stray away from others. Eventually you were so scared of others that when anyone tried to get close to you, you just pushed them away so you could save yourself from the embarrassment of being humiliated. Yet deep inside you really want to be like everyone else, surrounded by friends. Friends who cared about you and who wanted to know how you were feeling.”

 

Taeyeon felt a chill run down her spine. How the hell did this girl know this? Was she a mind reader? Maybe she was reading her mind right now and Taeyeon didn’t even know it.

 

Can you read my mind? Monkey ! Flying piggies! 6 legged gorilla on a unicycle!

 

Sunkyu just continued to stare at Taeyeon.

 

Okay, I guess not. But still, how the hell did she figure me out at all? This girl isn’t normal!

 

“I don’t know where you got that idea about myself, but let’s say you’re right. So what? Why should you care about how I live my life?”

 

*sigh* Sunkyu just shook her head as she looked at the baffled girl. “Because I want to get to know you better and become your friend. Simple as that.”

 

Taeyeon was having a hard time comprehending the smiling girl’s sentence. “But you don’t even know me. We don’t have anything in common.”

 

“Well first off, that’s why we get to know each other so we can become closer. And you don’t know if we have any similarities or not. Even if we don’t, it doesn’t mean we can’t be friends. Friendship isn’t that complicated”

 

Taeyeon couldn’t believe it. She was right. This whole time Taeyeon was trying to push this girl away while Sunkyu was just trying to be her friend. Taeyeon didn’t know how to describe this feeling, but it felt very comforting.

 

“Okay then…. Sunny. What are we supposed to do now?”

 

Sunkyu sat back down in the desk next to Taeyeon. “For starters, you could tell me about yourself and I would tell you about myself. We can talk about what we like, what we don’t like, strengths, weaknesses, dreams, or anything you’re comfortable with.”

 

Taeyeon let out a light chuckle. “Sorry, I don’t have much experience talking with people. Well for starters I’ve lived in Jeonju my whole life…”

 

Their conversation went on and on until the lunch bell rang and class resumed. Sunny explained to Taeyeon that both of her parents were detectives and that they taught her how to analyze the environment, study the suspect, and create a rational conclusion. Her family moved around a lot since her parents were solving cases all around Korea.

 

Recently her parents were assigned to a case in Jeonju and had to move in order to fully understand the crime. Since the family wanted to stick together, Sunny followed her parents and transferred late to the middle school in Jeonju.

 

Just learning about Sunny, Taeyeon couldn’t begin to explain the happiness she was feeling. She has never met anyone like her. Even though they only knew each other less than a day, Taeyeon was starting to feel very comfortable with Sunny.

 

After a couple of weeks, Taeyeon and Sunny were inseparable. In order to get to know Taeyeon better, Sunny insisted on taking her out to different places like arcades, movies, restaurants, and shopping malls. For Taeyeon, it was a first going to these types of places with someone other than herself. Eventually, they got to know each other so well that they felt like they’ve known each other forever.

 

For Taeyeon, she couldn’t be happier. But as the weeks went by, Taeyeon started to notice Sunny a little differently. It started when they decided to go to a mini golf course during the weekend. Both of them thought it would be a fun experience since Sunny has never held a putter in her life.

 

Sunny placed her ball on the flat green and instead of lightly tapping the ball through the windmill, she held the putter behind her back like a baseball bat and swung at the ball, causing it to fly into the parking lot.

 

Sunny placed her hand over her eyes while looking into the sky. “So did I win yet?”

 

Taeyeon let out her signature ajumma laugh that she only lets out in front of her family and Sunny. “No, you didn’t win. The object of the game is to lightly tap the ball into the hole, not attempt to break someone’s passenger windows.”

 

Feeling a little embarrassed, Sunny stuck her tongue to her cheek as she lightly tapped the ground with her shoe tip. “Do you think you can teach me?”

 

“Sure” Taeyeon got right behind Sunny and placed her hands on Sunny’s wrists.

 

“First things first, you have to relax your…”

 

As Taeyeon said that, she started to feel very warm. Her heart started to beat very fast and she felt sweat forming in her palms. When she took a breath, she noticed that Sunny recently sprayed a rose smelling perfume that made Taeyeon’s mind go in circles.

 

 “Relax my wrists? Then what?”

 

“Th-Then you take your hips and…”

 

 

Ever so slowly, Taeyeon found her hands on Sunny’s hips and noticed that Sunny’s backside was pressing into her front. Taeyeon couldn’t help but to lean slightly into Sunny’s hair and slowly take a whiff of her scent.

 

“Taeyeon, are you okay?” Sunny turned around and saw that Taeyeon’s face was bright red. She lifted Taeyeon’s bangs over hear forehead and leaned her forehead on Taeyeon’s.

 

“Wow, you’re burning up. Should we take you back home?”

 

Not a single word could be made out as Sunny’s face was only centimeters from hers. The only thing that Taeyeon could register was that Sunny’s eyes were a rich dark hazel. Her nose was so cute, it looked like a doll’s. And her luscious plump lips were just succulent that if she just leaned in a little more…

 

“I-I need to go to the bathroom-” While forcing herself to break away from Sunny, Taeyeon managed to stumble herself out of the putting area and into the women’s restroom.

 

She splashed some cold water on her face multiple times and stared at herself in the mirror. Taeyeon could see that her face was still red and that her eyes looked hungry. Like a cheetah that saw a gazelle and would do anything to get it. In her case, that gazelle had a name and her name was Lee Sunkyu.

 

Okay Taeyeon, breathe. Breath in, breath out. Breath in, breath out.

 

Stealing another glance at the restroom mirror, Taeyeon new exactly what she was feeling. Lust.

 

Taeyeon, you can’t do this. She’s your best friend and your only friend. Friends don’t look at each other like that. And also, she’s a girl! You don’t like girls! But then again you don’t really like guys, but that doesn’t mean you’re…

 

“There you were. For a second I thought you collapsed in the parking lot. How are you feeling?” Sunny was about to place a hand on Taeyeon’s forehead, but Taeyeon stepped back afraid she might release her lust filled self again.

 

“I’m fine. I think I just didn’t drink enough water.” Taeyeon slowly gulped as she purposely tried not to make eye contact with Sunny.

 

“Okay then, we can just call it a day and play mini golf next time.”

 

Taeyeon agreed and the two friends eventually went home early.

 

For the next few days Taeyeon was avoiding Sunny in class and also avoiding her phone calls and text messages. She constantly used the excuse that she was sick, and even though Sunny knew she was lying, chose to give her friend some space. Taeyeon was trying to clear her mind of Sunny by constantly telling herself that Sunny was just a friend and nothing more.

 

As the days went by, Sunny was the only thing on Taeyeon’s mind. She didn’t want to admit that she wasn’t straight, but she knew that there was some sort of attraction to the shorter girl.

 

Before any of them knew it, time flew by and it was already Valentine’s Day. Taeyeon never understood the whole premise of the holiday; a day where girls give chocolates to guys they like so that they can receive something on White Day. Since Taeyeon never met a guy she had feelings for, the idea of giving a guy chocolates never crossed her mind. But for Valentine’s Day she felt conflicted about her feelings.

 

She wouldn’t dare call her feelings for Sunny “love”, but she knows that it’s not nothing. In any case, there no better day like today. While walking to school, Taeyeon stopped by a convenience store and saw a cliché red heart shaped box of chocolates. She didn’t want to put too much thought into the gift since she still wasn’t sure of her own feelings, but she did know that Sunny plays a big role in her life.

 

After purchasing the chocolates, she stuffed it into her bag and made her way to school very briskly. She eventually made it to her classroom and there were red and pink hearts hung around. Many of the girls were giving their home made chocolates to the guys while the guys were grinning with delight. Some of the girls just shoved their chocolate into the guy’s chest then proceeded to run away in embarrassment.

 

Making her way around a couple in a matching pink outfit, Taeyeon was able to find Sunny talking to some other girls in class. Taeyeon couldn’t help to feel slightly jealous.

 

“Hey Taeyeon, can you believe it? The way everyone’s acting, you’d think they’re on drugs or something.” Sunny was very giggly today. Taeyeon assumed it was because the atmosphere was so light today.

 

“Yeah, a little too pink and red for my taste”

 

“Omo, did Kim Taeyeon actually just continue a conversation? It’s been a while since you responded to me besides ‘yeah…’ and sat in your seat.”

 

Taeyeon gave a nervous chuckle as she stuck her tongue out slightly. “I’m sorry, I’ve been going through some things lately.”

 

 “Heheh, no it’s okay. It started when we were at the mini golf course, right? Are you planning on telling me what happened?”

 

“Well about that… yeah you could say something did happen that day.”

 

“Well don’t keep me in suspense, what happened? I was thinking that maybe it was your time of the month, but you didn’t show the usual symptoms. It couldn’t have been hunger or stress since you show different signs for those. So I’m really curious what happened and why you were avoiding me for a whole week.”

 

Taeyeon looked around the classroom, noticing that everyone was busy exchanging gifts and talking about their plans for tonight.

 

For as long as she’s been with Sunny, she’s learned that she shouldn’t worry about what others think and speak her mind whenever she felt like it. She just hopes that Sunny won’t take it the wrong way.

 

“So while I was teaching you how to putt.”

 

Sunny leaned in a bit. “Yeah?”

 

“And I put my hands on your wrists”

 

“…yeah?”

 

“and when I put my hands on your waist…”

 

“Oh for crying out loud, what is it Taeyeon?”

 

Taeyeon could feel getting dry as she started to notice her classmates stopping their conversations and was listening intently to Taeyeon and Sunny.

 

“Well we’ve been friends for a long time and you could say you were my first close and best friend while I’m not sure if I was your first. No wait that didn’t sound right. You probably have a lot of friends besides me and I don’t know but maybe it’s because you’re my first friend that I’ve been feeling this way and-“

 

Before she could say another word, Sunny placed a finger on Taeyeon’s lips to stop her. “Just tell me clear and simply.”

 

While taking a deep breath, Taeyeon slowly exhaled and started to her bag.

 

“The thing is Sunny, you’re a very special person to me. I don’t know how to describe it, but you’re a big part of my life. I’ve never met anyone like you Sunny.”

 

“Aww, thanks Taeyeon. That’s so sweet. Now why would you want to avoid me because of that?”

 

“Well the thing is-“ Taeyeon got on one knee and was looking up at Sunny.

 

“T-Taeyeon, what are you doing?” said Sunny with a nervous smile.

 

“I don’t know what this is Sunny, but after giving it some thought I think I might have figured it out. You’re a very important person in my life and I wouldn’t like it if you belonged to anyone else.” Taeyeon managed to pull out her big red box of chocolates and held it in front of Sunny.

 

“I was wondering if you would be my valentine Sunny.” Taeyeon showed Sunny a slightly nervous smile.

 

“…Valentine? You mean as friends, r-r-right Taeyeon?” Taeyeon noticed that Sunny’s eyes were starting to moisten and that caused Taeyeon to feel her eyes getting wet too.

 

“No Sunny. When I said you’re a very important person to me, I really meant it. As your valentine I want us to be more than frien-”

 

Oh my god, is she serious?!

 

Cold stares and harsh whispering was starting to spread after the comment was yelled.

 

I knew Kim was always a loner, but I’d never would’ve guessed she was !

 

Eww, so is she like a carpet dyke? To think we’d have one in this school!

 

Taeyeon could hear a lot of the spiteful comments around her and that caused her to start shaking as she felt her tears fall.

 

Sunny placed her hand over as she started to cry as well.

 

“Taeyeon… I’m sorry. I’m not like that… I’m not... a freak.”

 

At that moment Taeyeon’s heart sank. Her chest felt so heavy. It was as if every word Sunny said was a dagger stabbed into her heart.

It hurts…

Oh God, it hurts…

Sunny…

 

As tears were streaming from her face, Sunny pushed her way out of the classroom while the whole class started to laugh and chant hurtful words to Taeyeon.

 

Freak!

 

!

 

Take your homo back to the farm!

 

Taeyeon was clutching her chest as she felt herself fall to the ground. Taeyeon was convulsing as she couldn’t hold back the sobs or wails of agony any longer. She didn’t care anymore. She just wanted to die. She wished someone would just let her out of her misery.

 

FREAK!

!

DYKE !

 

…freak…

 

…taeyeon…

 

 

…freak…

 

 

…taeyeon…

 

…freak…

 

TAEYEON!!!

 

***

 

“Taeyeon!”

 

Taeyeon was broken out of her trance as Yuri was slightly shaking her shoulders while giving her a look of concern.

 

“Hey are you okay? I’ve been calling your name for almost a minute and you weren’t responding.”

 

Taeyeon shook her head gently as she was feeling a little light headed. She noticed that she was in some sort of clothing store at the mall with Yuri and there were barely any people shopping around her.

 

“Yeah, I’m sorry. I kind of spaced out for a minute, it happens sometimes.” Taeyeon gave herself a light knock on her forehead as she reassured he fried that she was okay.

 

“O~kay. Anyways, about this shirt” Yuri held up a t-shirt which had a giant heart in the middle with frilly designs around it. Just staring at the heart was making Taeyeon’s heart feel heavy.

 

“It’s okay I guess. Not really my style.”

 

Yuri turned the shirt around and was inspecting it. “Yeah I see what you mean. It’s kind of gay.”

 

Yuri hung the shirt back on the rack and started to walk towards another shirt until she noticed Taeyeon was rooted to the same spot.

 

“Taeyeon, are you okay?”

 

Taeyeon’s chest was feeling heavy as her knees started to shaking a little bit.

 

“Hey Yuri, when you say gay, what do you mean by that?”

 

Yuri walked towards Taeyeon while pondering the question.

 

“I think it just means that it’s different. You know, gay.” Yuri said while shrugging her shoulder.

 

“But what I mean is, is it bad?”

 

“Heh, no of course not. Just because something is different, doesn’t mean it’s bad. With the shirt, it just doesn’t match my style, but it probably matches someone else’s. Why do you ask?”

 

Taeyeon relaxed her shoulders as she cracked a smile on her face. “No reason, just curious.”

 

“Hahaha, yah!” Yuri playfully knocked Taeyeon’s head “Sometimes I wonder what goes on inside that head of yours.” Yuri walked towards another rack of clothes and was searching thoroughly.

 

Taeyeon sighed as she made her way towards Yuri.

 

That’s what I’m afraid of.

 

---

Annyeong! Did you guys miss me? lol, well anywyas I missed you.. lol. Anyways, please anticipate my next chapter since I plan to post it really soon. As always, comments are always appreciative!