Chapter 12
I Do...Forever
Donghae P.O.V
A week has past by from that incident with Hyukjae's parents. A week has also gone by with me not mentioning anything about the incident to Hyukjae. I wasn't planning to either.
I'm lying if I told you that I dont feel guilty at all for hiding this from him. But at the moment, I think that is the best for him. Hyukjae doesn't need to know this yet.
Hyukjae doesn't need to be reminded that his parents hates me, that his parents does not approve of our relationship, or he was disown by his parents for being in love with a guy. Since, he can remember everything BUT me, most probably he doesn't remember incidents that involved me too.
So, yes. He just doesn't need to be reminded about these...yet. For now, I just want to enjoy my time with him.
I would also be lying if I said that I am not worried at all about what Hyukjae's parents gonna do to me. I was worried that they will jump or cornered me in a dark alleyway and torture me to death.
Its been a week, but I just cant help feeling anxious over what they can or will do to me.
Will they hire someone to kill me or kill me themselves? Will they come meet me and threaten me again? Will they take Hyukjae away when I'm not around? Or worst, will they hurt my friends and family?
I'm not too worried about Hyukjae being hurt because I know that they won't do anything that would hurt him.
Anyway, all this anxieties and negative thoughts kept pushing in my mind and I cant help but to be more paranoid by the minute.
I kept thinking that I am being followed or watch, or I would be ran over by a black car while trying to cross the roads, or simply stupidly thinking that I would die just because I fell down from accidently kicking a damn small rock. Hell, I even imagine that a harmless cute stray dog, was a big fierce dog that would come and bite my leg off.
God...all these feelings are killing me. It cost me my beauty sleep and my daily routine.
I can't sleep well at night as you can see the bags under my eyes and not to mentioned my clumsiness is getting worst too, especially at my work place. Droping coffe cups, running into tables or people, falling down, or dropping files and papers wherever I go.
Its stressing me out... and I am sure its stressing everybody around me. But, they were really nice people as they didn't say anything bad about it. I mean, they have to be REALLY,REALLY,REALLY good people to be able to still stay silence throughout my whole stupid paranoid period.
Geeez.... I need a break... I seriously do.
I gave a loud sighed, while making a cup of coffee in the kitchen. I dont usually like coffee, but with all the stress, I just thought the caffeine might do me good...even if just a bit.
It was a slow,quiet monday morning, and I was ready to go to work. Hyukjae was in the room getting ready. I was not looking forward towards my job though. I just felt like lying and buried myself in my bed under my covers. Talk about monday blues.
"Hey...are you ready?" Hyukjae's voice suddenly put me out of my thoughts. I looked up at me and man... he looked as fine as ever with his suit and tie, suitable for his position as a businessman.
"yeah...I'm ready. Here's your strawberry milk before we go" I smiled and pass him a glass of strawberry milk, while putting the rest of the carton back into the fridge.
"Thank you. Ahhh...yummy" And he finished all of it in one go, while I just chuckled slowly at his antics. Hyukjae and his strawberry, I rolled my eyes thinking of this.
"kajja Hae-ah". I just nodded and went to the car, as today he is sending me to the office.
20 minutes later, we arrived at my workplace. With a goodbye and a promise to pick me up at 6PM later, Hyukjae drove away to his own workplace now.
I took a deep breath and released it, then turn around and ready myself to face another stressful day. I went into the elevator and press towards my department floor.
Awkwardness and quite. Thats what greeted me when I stepped out of the elevator. Everything and everybody around me suddenly becomes quite.
They were all looking at me. Some with sympathetic look, some a confuse look, or some were just simply mocking or smirking towards me. I was totally confused.
"Hm..mor..morning" I said and try my hardest to smile at all of them, though I'm pretty sure it came out more like a grimace.
Some "hi" were heard back, and they all quickly turn their faces away. Just as I was about to walk to my place, the manager comes out.
"Donghae, I want to see you. NOW!!" and walked in back without waiting for me to reply. I was stunned for a minute until someone nudge me. I shake my head and rushed my way towards manager's office.
I knocked softly on the door, and a gruff voice sounded from the inside asking me to come-in. I slowly open the door, and put my head in first followed by the rest of my body.
"you..you want...to see me Mr.Shin"? I stuttered out.
"Come in Donghae. Sit down" He said while gesturing me to sit in front of him. I sat slowly and waited anxiously for him to tell me the reason he wants to see me.
"Hae (cough)..hm, (cough).. I dont know how to say this" Mr. Shin said, hesitantly. I felt weird, because Mr. Shin was never hesitant or awkward around me.
The truth is, Mr. Shin is like a father to me. He has always helped me when I have problem with my work, teaching me, and was always concern in terms of my financial, frequently asking whether I have enough money to survived. Even when he knows that I had more than enough with Hyukjae. So, I was kinda surprise to see him like this.
"what is it Mr.Shin?" I asked.
"hm..you're...I'm sorry, but...you're fired".
I was shocked. I couldn't say anything. I just stared at him, thinking and hoping desperately that he would say that he was just kidding me. But, he never did.
"I'm really sorry Donghae. I just..." I cut him off
"What did I do? Wh...why sir?" A million scenario and questions was playing through my mind. What did I do? Did I said something that hurt him? Or was it another worker? Did I hurt them? Did I not do my job properly?
"Its...Its just... Look, I like you Donghae. But, there are some workers...who is not...as open or as receiving as I am. I mean, they are not really comfortable...with you..being...you know..." he finished hesitantly hoping that I would understand. But, I seriously dont.
"Me being what sir? I dont get it?"
"you being...married..to..another guy" Mr.Shin said, desperately. And this time, I did understand.
"you mean for me being...gay?" Mr. Shin sighed, and nodded slowly while trying to avoid looking to my face.
I wanted to be mad, screamed and shout. But instead I just asked slowly (whispered) "why now? I've been in this company...for long. Almost 4 years. It wasn't a secret even from the start. So, why now?"
Mr. Shin sighed. "I dont know Hae-ah... It just happens. I guess people realized about it, plus with Mr. Lee convinced them that this is...."
"Mr.Lee?" Again I cut him off. "As in Mr.Lee Soo Man, Hyukjaes father?". Again, Mr. Shin just gave a sigh and nod.
I was mad...and upset. That I didnt think before I speak next.
"So, thats it? You just fired me because Mr.Lee wants you to? Because just so suddenly he made you realize that I am gay now? , I didn't even do anything besides just being myself. My one trueself, and you fired me for that?" I almost screamed.
"Tell me the truth. Its not about me being gay right? Its just about Mr.Lee threathening you and your company right?" I was breathing harshly after that, while looking at him.
"Dont make this harder for me okay Donghae. Just...pack your stuff". Mr. Shin said.
But, I wasn't done.
"Was I not good enough for this company? Though I am gay, did I ever do something that would make others uncomfortable or something? What did I actually do to deserve this. Please, enlighten me Mr.Shin because I seriously dont see how being gay from the beginning, could cause me my job now. AFTER 4 ING YEARS!!!" I shouted, unable to contain my anger now.
"Its JUST THAT!!" Mr. Shin raised his voice now, and slam his palm on the table.
"You're making others uncomfortable... and it can jeopardize the whole company" Mr. Shin shouted.
Jeopardize? The company...? Then it clicked.
"He would shut down the company if you dont fire me. Thats what Mr.Lee threaten you with. Fire me, or lose your company" I said slowly, with my eyes getting wider and wider after each realization.
Mr. Shin gave a long sighed now. "Yes...he did...I'm sorry Donghae... Its...its not you..."
I was hurt, because the one person that I believed to be the best after my own father...is abandoning me. Mr. Shin, a man that I trusted and believed in... abandoned me. But, I cant find myself to be mad at him because it is his company that is in danger now. He has his own REAL family to support and couldn't afford to lose the company. But, at the same time I counldn't help but feel...betrayed.
"I guess thats it then. I know what I am worth now. Your company should come first, before a pathethic gay, orphan like me huh?" I said bitterly.
"Hae-ah..."Mr. Shin tried to say, but I just ignored him. "I'll go pack my stuff now" and I turned around without a single glance towards him anymore, and slammed the door behind me.
I ignored all the others looking at me and went straight to my table. I cleared everything, while trying to hold in the tears. Suddenly, a hand rest against mine, stopping my movement. I looked up and saw Seohyun, one of the sweetest staff in the office.
"Hae oppa. I'm sorry. You gonna be okay? Dont you want to discuss this over again. YES, lets talk to Mr. Shin again. I'll come with you" she said desperately, while trying to pull my hands towards Mr.Shin's office. But, I just pull mu hand back.
"Its okay Seohyun-ah. I'm fine. I dont think its necessary anyway" I sighed and continued packing. I heard a soft sob coming form her, so I raised my head to look at her.
"But...but...its not fair. You dont deserve this oppa". I just smiled and shake my head. I raised my thumb and wipe her tears. "Its okay. We can still see each other after this okay?" She nodded slowly, while tears still running down her face.
I continued packing my stuff, and everything went on auto-pilot after that.
I dont remember walking out, Seohyun and a few other workers crying while seeing me out. I dont remember stoping or getting into a taxi, or telling the driver where I live. I dont even remember coming down from the taxi.
Now, I'm standing in front of the door and I couldn't find the energy to open it. Thats when the hurt and the sadness finally came to me. Slowly, I fall to my knees with my forehead on the door. I then turned around while leaning my back on the door while sitting on my , and pull my knees ups to cover my face.
I cried so hard until I couldn't breath properly. I was just so hurt...sad and...lost. After what felt like hours, when the truth its just been a few minutes, I finally stopped crying and just sobbed slowly. I took a long breath, and finally find my streght to open the door and enter the apartment.
I went to the kitchen to make myself some tea, to calm my nerves. I was boiling water when suddenly my phone rang. Without thinking, I just picked it up.
"Yeobosaeyo?"
"I told you to leave my son alone, but you wouldn't listen" A harshed voice came from the other side. I widened my eyes when I heard it.
"Who..who is this?" I asked hesitantly.
"You know very well who I am Donghae" Came the harsh reply, again. I just kept silent.
"Leave my son, or you will lose more than just your job. And just to let you know, good luck trying to find a new job. I'll make sure it wont be so easy for you" with that the line went dead.
I just stood there, still with my phone beside my ear with nothing but silence around me. I was brought out of my shocked state, nearly droping my phone with the shrilled ring from the kettle on the stove. I turned off the stove with my shaking hands, while trying to calm my beating heart.
Suddenly tea doesn't sound so calming now. I decided to forget everything and just sleep. So, slowly I went to my bedroom. A sudden urged of need for Hyukjae took over me, but I refuse to call / disturbed him.
So, I went to his room and grabbed one of his oversize t-shirt. I took off my clothes only leaving my boxers, and slide the big t-shirt over my head whick came pass my knees.
I went to Hyukjae's bed and immediately lay on it and pull the covers over me, not caring how Hyukjae will react if he finds out. I just dont care right now.
Surrounded by Hyukjae's scent, the tears just came rushing out. I missed him so much and at times like this, only Hyukjae could really calm me. Only Hyukjae can comfort me with his hugs, his kisses and his sweet words.
I hugged one of his pillow tighter, and cried harder. I was just so tired...that I finally just let the sleep take over my tired body after that.
END CHAPTER.
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Author's note :
Hye guys.... I am so sorry for not updating for soooo long. Mianhae....Hope you guys still remember this story....T___T
Anyway, let me know what you think okay...do leave some comment for me okay dear readers....^_^
Sorry if it is crappy.....and short.........;(
P/S : Characters does not belong to me, ONLY the plot. ENJOY!!! Sorry for all the spelling and grammar mistakes....T___T
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