Story: A Father's Touch by valoweec
Reviewed by: E
Finished: 1/1/13

Title:
The title is a quick giveaway of what the story is about, but it’s pretty general and appealing which attracts the reader into thinking what kind of father’s touch. A cruel father’s touch? A loving father’s touch? I say good job on the title, attractive and related to the story.

Characters:
Yongguk:
Now, I don’t read many family fiction, usually stories that have to do with parenthood, and I am glad this one is sent in to us. This story is a good show of an admirable father figure that you have perceived of Yongguk as the leader of B.A.P. The description of Yongguk’s character is very mellow and peaceful, even a little stubborn as we see him pursue the woman he makes his wife. We show a side of him that is romantic and we see the flaws in him of his lack of knowledge on how to take care of a child. Though, this story is more of an epilogue after his journey to fatherhood with more time to come. Anyway, leaving that journey part alone until the next section. You did very well in giving a believable character in Yongguk.

Wife:
Though minor, she must be mentioned. I have taken that she is brash and independent black woman who has set certain standards in the men she will take into consideration of dating. Then we see the feminine characteristics of her attraction to Yongguk with him holding her baby cousin and whenever he holds their baby.

Minhee:
A major role without doing a single thing except crying, laughing, and sleeping as a baby should. Nothing to mention except that it’s a believable baby.

Plot:
Like I said in Yongguk’s character, there isn’t much of a journey of character development. It’s more of an epilogue rather than a story. Of course, this is a one shot, and it would be difficult to create a journey out of one-shot. Also, with this story and Yongguk still an idol, I find it hard to believe that Yongguk would date someone else besides another celebrity. However, you executed well the connection between them, but it would have been a little more effective in how the friend knows Yongguk.

All in all, it’s an ok plotline.

Grammar:
Just a few minor awkward words, sentences, or misspellings. But, nothing a little re-reading can’t fix.

Style:
Very simple and easy to read. Though, in a personal opinion, not my kind of reading. However, there is a lot of intimacy and emotion brought out into this writing. And very cute, just not enough to bring someone to tears at how good it is. The story and plotline is far too simple for something so heart wrenching.

Not bad, I liked it myself. It’s a quick read, but not exactly something I would recommend. There is a missing piece in this story that would bring out some sort of emotion. I may look more deeply into this in the future if I find the time and maybe make a new revised review just for this story. Thanks for requesting!