Please Read: This story is written mainly in Daehyun's point of view, although it's written in third person everything is being described from how Daehyun sees things in this story. So just a reminder that everything may not be as it seems. Also, point of views are subject to change, but it will be made fairly obvious when those shifts occur.

Daehyun jolted upright.

He thought he heard someone scream followed by a loud snap, but as he glanced back to check he saw nothing, only the faint movement of the trees and the wind playing between the leaves. Daehyun scrunched his eyebrows in confusion.

That's funny...I could have sworn I heard something.

But when he glanced around the small park again his eyes came up with nothing suspicious. Although he couldn't shake the feeling that he was being watched.

Deciding to dismiss it for now, Daehyun turned back in his seat and gazed gently at the person besides him. He couldn't help the smile that appeared on his lips. Their endless sticky note war had stopped and now both boys sat relaxed between a sea of yellow and purple. Daehyun had to hold back a chuckle when he saw how many pieces of paper they went through. Anybody walking through the park would have surely thought they were strange, but Daehyun could care less.

It surpsried him really, how a boy he only met yesterday managed to carve such a deep spot in his heart. Daehyun wasn't one to open up easily to people, but something about Youngjae made him think differently. Although he didn't know much about Youngjae, Daehyun knew one thing for sure- he was special. And as cheesy as that sounded he knew it was true. Something in his heart told him it was. Daehyun leaned his head over his hands and supported them by placing his elbows over his legs. He tilted his head lightly to the side, all the while keeping his eyes on the boy in front of him.

Daehyun let his eyes wander over Youngjae's slim figure again. He had a habit of doing that now. It seemed Youngjae was even creating new habits for him now and Daehyun gave a small chuckle at the thought. He carefully observed Youngjae writing in his small notebook taking note of the little scritch noises as the other's pen flew across the paper. He noticed the journal Youngjae was writing in was the same one he saw yesterday.

Daehyun bit his lip as he fought with his inner self. In the end curiousity got the better of him and  he pulled out significantly smaller pad of sticky notes and started writing. He reached over and stuck the sticky piece of paper on a clear space in Youngjae's journal.

What are you writing?

Youngjae stopped writing when his eyes caught a familiar sight of yellow. He smiled a small smile and wrote out a response. However Daehyun didn't miss the moment of slight hesitation Youngjae had just before his pen hit the paper.

It's a secret.

As Youngjae stuck the note down he turned and placed a pointer finger on his lips, a sign that he wasn't planning on telling anytime soon. Daehyun raised an eyebrow, but didn't say anything in response.

You seem to be full of secrets.

So it seems.

Daehyun saw the slight smirk on the youngers face, and even though he could tell it was out of playfulness. There was something else behind that smirk. Something that disturbed Daehyun to no end and he wanted so badly to figure out what it was. But prying would get him nowhere. For now, it seemed all Daehyun could do was try and get to know the boy better. Everything would work out with time.

But....that only makes me want to know more about you ;)

He caught Youngjae's gaze as a small flush appeared on the younger ones cheeks. He noticed Youngjae clutched his notebook tighter and hastily looked away. Daehyun smiled and held back a laugh.

You know you're quite stubborn...why do you want to get to know me so badly?

Daehyun read the response and flashed a lopsided grin towards the other.

This may sound strange to you, but somehow I feel like we were meant to meet.

He caught the way Youngjae's eyebrows scrunched together when the younger boy was confused and he came to the conclusion that it was the most adorable sight he had ever seen. He resisted the urge to hug the other in fear he would get pushed away.

You mean like fate?

Yeah, like fate. I feel like fate somehow brought us together.

Daehyun gave a smile, but Youngjae rolled his eyes, although the corners of his lips gave a twitch.

You are so cheesy.

Daehyun shrugged his shoulders, might as well accept the truth rather than deny it.

But strangely enough you might be right.

Daehyun glanced up at Youngjae and was about to question him. As he met eyes with the other he saw a flicker of something flash through Youngjae's eyes. Daehyun couldn't make out what it was, but he noticed Youngjae's eye's shined just a tiny bit more than before.

You have a good heart.

He watched Youngjae continue to write. There was a moment of hesitation where Youngjae stopped his pen briefly, but it flew by so quickly that Daehyun didn't even notice.

You said you wanted to know more about me, but the truth is I don't even know a lot about myself.

Daehyun tilted his head and furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, not quite understanding what Youngjae meant by that statement. He was tempted to speak, but he stopped himself. Instead he opted for another choice.

What do you mean by that?

Youngjae didn't even know he was holding his breath until his lungs started to scream for oxygen and he let out a much needed sigh.

He comtemplated to tell Daehyun anything. He couldn't deny the strong attraction he held for the brown haired boy. It wasn't just physical, it was something more than that...much more. But what he had to tell was not meant for average ears. Youngjae bit his botttom lip in hesitation. He could take a chance and risk being judged by the only boy that made his heart flutter. Or he could choose to stay silent and risk losing Daehyun as a friend.

Daehyun noticed Youngjae's hesitation as his eyes caught the wavering movement of Youngjae's pen as he wrote. His own eyebrows furrowed in thought.

What I mean is.

Youngjae hesitated again, his pen stopping mid sentence as he struggled to find the right words.

Daehyun was just a random stranger. It was just supposed to be a one time conversation, nothing more. Yet when Youngjae thought about never talking to Daehyun again it felt as if his heart would tear into two. Changes were beginning to happen and Youngjae noticed them all. Everytime Daehyun moved he couldn't help the small flourish of color that would flow into his cheeks and everytime Daehyun smiled it was so contagious that he couldn't help but smile as well. The beautiful cresent shape of Daehyun's eyes when he laughed and the way his lips moved when he talked. Even Daehyun's small habit of twiddling his thumbs whenever he was nervous.

Yes. Youngjae noticed them all.

And it was starting to scare him.

Daehyun was now certain something was boethering Youngjae as he saw the pen on the paper stop moving. He took in Youngjae's confused and torn face and he felt his heart give a squeeze. It looked like Youngjae was fighting with his own thoughts. It looked like Youngjae was conflicted and that was the last thing he wanted to cause the younger to be. He didn't want Youngjae to reveal anything he didn't want to, even if he was dying from the curiosity. If Youngjae wasn't ready to tell him yet than he was fine with that and he would respect that.

Without thinking his hands reached out and gently laid themselves on top of the younger boy's hand. Youngjae didn't jump...as Daehyun expected, but he didn't look up either. Daehyun felt the small shudders that went through the others hand and his face changed into a soft smile. He squeezed Youngjae's hands lightly.

"Youngjae..." he called gently. When Youngjae still didn't respond he tried again. This time Daehyun took one of his hands and gently took a hold of Youngjae's chin and tilted his face to meet his eyes. Daehyun's eyes searched Youngjae's trying to locate the reason for the boy's current state of emotion. What he found tore at his heart.

Youngjae's eyes looked so lost and desperate and frustrated. And although Daehyun had no idea what the younger could possibly be going through he felt the urge to help the other. However before Daehyun even had a chance to make another move, the desperate look Youngjae had quickly disappeared as he came to realize the situation he was in. Soon his conflicted look was replaced with a reddening blush. Youngjae struggled to scoot away. Daehyun could care less though about the closeness, in fact he rather enjoyed it but he let the other escape his grasp with an inaudible sigh. Youngjae was now a good distance away from the brunette boy and he let out a small breath of relief. To his luck Daehyun didn't seem to notice. However Daehyun's smile changed to a rather playful one and he reached across to gently ruffle Youngjae's auburn hair.

"Youngjae," he started again, now that he had the others attention. "It's okay if you don't want to tell me anything yet. I won't rush you and you dont have to force yourself." He held their gaze together for a little longer until Youngjae broke away in embarassment. Daehyun gave a small laugh and ruffled Youngjae's hair again. He watched slightly amused as the younger shot him a displeased look and tried to fix his tousled hair.

Daehyun let out another chuckle and shook his head. He didn't think Youngjae could become even cuter than he already was, but he came to learn that with Youngjae anything was possible.

As he stopped laughing he noticed Youngjae was writing something again. He followed the others motions until they stopped directly above his notebook.

Thank you.

Two simple words...yet they held so much meaning. Daehyun coudn't help the bright smile that made its way onto his face.

Of course.

You'll tell me when you're ready.

Youngjae smiled and this time, for the first time, his eyes seemed to smile with him. They lit up with a new light Daehyun had yet to see.

Everyone has their own story right? A past. A present. A future. Each of those holding something special and mysterious.

And Youngjae nodded, smile dropping slightly. Oh how true he knew those words were.

And now...

Youngjae was slightly confused and he tilted his head at the words. His eyes accidently caught Daehyun's gaze and Daehyun gave an unnoticiable smirk.

And now I can't wait for you to share those memories with me.

Youngjae blinked. He glanced at the yellow sticky note again. He had to reread what Daehyun wrote just to be sure he read correctly. When he was sure he wasn't imagining things he broke out into a wide smile which eventually turned into a full out laugh. Daehyun blushed slightly and turned his head away, now embarassed at what he had done.

Oh god Daehyun...now look what you did.

As he mentally scolded himself he almost didn't notice the newly written sticky note waiting for him in the sea of yellow and purple. He turned his head towards it and he couldn't help but notice how Youngjae was still smiling and shaking his head slightly. The sight was enough to make his insecurities go away as he knew that he was the cause of that smile. He noticed that Youngjae's smile seemed to be genuine, as it touched his eyes and left them shining.

I never knew you could be so cheesy. Then again I had a feeling. but I guess it's something I can get used to.

Aha thanks?

Youngjae stopped laughing and he turned forward. His eyes followed two leaves as the wind blew them around. His gaze turned thoughtful.

Daehyun, being the dense boy he was, didn't notice Youngjae's sudden change in attitude and was smiling nonstop. He felt as if he was going to explode from the happiness. Somehow he felt as if he'd gotton closer to the younger boy. He was just about to reach over again to lightly ruffle Youngjae's hair, but before he could a blood curdling scream pierced through the air, one that sent sharp shivers down his spine.

"Himchan!" Yongguk hissed as he slapped a hand over his trembling boyfriend's mouth. He quickly dashed behind the tree and made sure they both were completely hidden before he gently took his hand off and spoke. "What in the world did you do that for? Do you want to get caught by them?"

Himchan was still trembling slightly as he tried to recover over what happened.

"T-There was a spider." He managed to blurt out and Yongguk sighed and slid a hand over his face.

Earlier when he had turned back towards the tree he had finally found a position comfortable enough where he could get a somewhat clearer view of the boys. But he still couldn't make out the auburn haired boy's face because Daehyun kept moving his head, thus blocking his view. Just as he was about to get a clear view of the the other boy something large, black, and prickly landed on the tip of his nose. Himchan froze and held his breath. He had a pretty good idea of what it was, only he was too terrified to check. Because, truth be told, he was dealthly terrified of spiders. He couldn't stand to be within one foot of where one was, much less have one land on his nose.

He couldn't help but let out a very audible scream.

Himchan snuck a glance up at his boyfriend and he was met with an amused but understanding face. Himchan just gave a sheepish smile and laid back into Yongguk's arms. As he laid there though he couldn't help the small frown that appeared across his face. Usually when he did something embarassing (like scream because of a spider) Yongguk would tease and even poke fun of him a little. Which would then eventually end in him getting a hug or kiss because he would get super annoyed and sulk. Something in their relationship had changed. The change was barely noticeable, in fact Himchan never actually realized it until very recently, but it was there nonetheless.

Himchan squeezed his eyes shut and let out a shaky breath. No. It was alright now. The past was the past. He was over thinking things.

I'm just thinking too much. Everything is fine now. Everything is fine.

Everything was fine. Right?

Yongguk didn't seem to notice his boyfriends sudden change in attitude. He was too busy glancing out from behind the tree to make sure they weren't discovered. He kept one hand gripped tightly on Himchan's waist and the other leaned on the base of the tree to keep them balanced. He looked out and saw Daehyun look around with wide eyes and then squint his eyes in confusion as he saw nobody around the park. The other boy, the one with auburn hair, seemed to just sit there acting as if nothing happened. Yongguk forrowed his eyebrows at this. Only when Daehyun stood up and start walking around did the boy react.

Yongguk struggled to get a better view, but it was hard. He could see Daehyun look around, trying to find where the scream had come from a look of concern was clearly on his face. Yongguk could see that the other boy gotton up as well only his back was turned against him. The boy followed after Daehyun. Daehyun looked confused as the other boy approached him. He gave Daehyun a small piece of paper and when Daehyun tried to explain the boy shook his head and handed him another piece of paper. Daehyun looked even more confused after that and started walking some more. When Daehyun shot a glance over in their direction Yongguk in a breath. He was sure they had been discovered. But he let it out with a loud sigh of relief when he saw Daehyun start to make his way back to the bench.

It was a close call and Yongguk was about to turn back to try and convince Himchan to head home. He figured they had 'observed' enough. The longer they stayed the more likely they were going to be discovered. However just as he was about to turn away, the auburn haired boy turned his head up giving him a very clear view of his face.

Yongguk's breath caught in his throat and his eyes widned in shock. The grip he had on Himchan's waist unconsiously became tighter, so tight that Himchan let out a sound of disapproval. But Yongguk didn't notice as his eyes were too busy trying to take in the scene in front of him.

No.

Yonguk was positive he was hallucinating, but no matter how many times he blinked. The sight in front of him wasn't going away.

It was real...very real and he couldn't believe it.

This-this can't be happening. This is impossible.

So immeresed in his thoughts, it wasn't until Himchan started squirming around in his arms that he realized the other was still trapped in his embrace. Yongguk quickly tore his eyes away from behind him and unwrapped his arms. He struggled to keep calm and hide the worry in his eyes, but it was hard considering what or who he just saw.

Himchan was getting uncomfortable. He felt Yongguk's arms get tighter around him, so tight to the point where it was almost bruising. He let out a sound of disapproval, but it went unnoticed by the other. He had no idea what sparked Yongguk's change of attitude. He seemed just fine a couple minutes ago. Deciding enough was enough Himchan squirmed out of his boyfriend's grip. He turned around to ask what triggered the sudden change in attitude, only to stop midway after he saw the look in Yongguk's eyes. It looked as if Yongguk had seen a ghost. His face was pale and his eyes were eerily distant.

"Gukkie," he softly spoke, "What's wrong?" When Yongguk didn't answer it only scared him more. Panicking slightly he quickly grabbed Yongguk by the shoulders and gave him a quick shake.

"Yongguk!" He said again louder this time.

Yongguk finally snapped out of his trance and that was when Himchan saw it. The pained look that appeared. He'd only seen Yongguk like this once, but that was a long time ago. Himchan gasped and quickly retracted his hands. In a shaky voice he asked what was wrong, when Yongguk still didn't answer and continued to gaze at him with that tortured look, he almost lost it.

Then it hit him.

Just a few moments ago Yongguk was looking out from behind the large maple tree. He was checking on Daehyun and that boy. He must have seen something.

Now Himchan was truely starting to panic. If that expression meant what he thought it meant than he really was terrified. But it was impossible. The situation he was imagining would never happen. He was 100% sure. With shaky breaths Himchan took a couple steps forward towards the trunk of the tree. He had to see.

Yongguk saw what Himchan was trying to do and quickly he placed his arms around Himchan's waist in an attempt to stop him.

"Himchan wait you can't."

Himchan stopped and placed his hands ontop of Yongguk's. "You know I have to." He breathed back.

"It was nothing. Just please trust me alright? Please." The last part was barely a whisper but it was loud enough for Himchan to catch.

"Yongguk that was definitely not nothing." Himchan's voice was frim. "Now let me go. I need to see."

Yongguk relctanctly retracted his arms, but he stayed close. Himchan started walking towards the tree again stopping at the same spot Yongguk was at before. He let his eyes scan the park, roving over every little detail, but when his eyes landed on the spot where the unknown auburn haired boy sat he froze. Himchan's breath caught in his throat and his eyes became glassy as he felt something in his heart tear apart. The impact came so fast that he barely had time to take a breath. Yongguk slid his hands over his eyes in an attempt to prevent him from seeing, but it was to late.

He had seen.

"Himchan," Yongguk whispered. "It might not be what it looks like." But even his words sounded weak in his ears.

Himchan stood frozen in that spot. He was glad Yongguk was covering his eyes because he was sure if he continued looking it would result in him breaking down. His mind was throbbing as he tried to piece together what- or who- he just saw. The memories he kept sealed away for so many years suddenly started to flow back up again. They came so fast Himchan's head felt like it would burst from the pain and he sunk to the floor.

All those years of trying to forget and suddenly the memories were as clear again as if they had happened moments ago.

       "You know we'll always be together right?"

                    "Hyung!!----WATCH OUT!!"                                                        "Hey! Wake up!! Wake up! Please! Please!! Wake up!"            

                                                                  "It's okay......it's okay...."

"Murderur!! NO! NOOOOO!!!"

                                                        "I'm sorry, but it's too late."

"-chan! Himchan!" Yongguk's voice was shaking as he tried to break Himchan from his trance.

Himchan didn't even realize he was on the ground shaking uncontrollably until he felt strong arms wrap around his shoulders, pulling him up gently. He didn't even know how he ended up on the ground. But that was the least of his worries as he reached up to hold his head.

The voices were louder than before.

Almost instantly he became aware of his surroundings again. He was at the park near the boba shop Yongguk owned. He was spying on Daehyun. Everything had been fine until...until he saw who Daehyun was with. With shaky legs Himchan managed to turn himself around to meet Yongguk's very worried gaze.

"Channie..." Yongguk breathed. He knew very well what Himchan was thinking.

"I-it can't be Yongguk...it can't be...." Himchan's voice shook. His lower lip trembled as he fought to keep his breathing steady.

"I-I know Himchan, maybe...maybe it's not who we think it is."

Himchan widened his eyes at Yongguks claim, he wanted to badly to believe it was true. But his eyes didn't lie.

"No." His breathing shook even more now. "I know who I saw Yongguk. I-it was him! He's sitting right there!! Right there next to Deahyun." Himchan's breath came out in short huffs.

"Oh God....Yongguk...IT'S HIM!! Can't you see?!!IT'S HIM!!"

Yongguk said nothing.

"B-but that's impossible...impossible...I saw it with my own eyes. I saw it. You saw it. The crash. The fire."

Himchan's breathing became faster.

"Everything. Everything!! It was all my fault. All my fault. No no no...."

Himchan was fully hyperventilating now as he continously pulled at his hair. His body shook violently. Yongguk couldn't take it anymore and quickly pulled him into his arms and tried to rub soothing circles onto his back.

"Himchan," he whispered. "Shh...shh calm down. Take deep breaths. It wasn't your fault. It was never your fault. Believe me when I tell you this." Yongguks looked staright into Himchan's panicked eyes.

"But Yongguk," Himchan whispered desperately. "It was. It was all my fault. If I hadn't been distracted. If I just paid attention! Just one more damned second of attention!! It wouldn't have happened and I-I wouldn't have caused his d---"

Before he could have a chance to say anything more Yongguk quickly pulled him closer, shielding his face from the world. Himchan was starting to hyperventilate again this time his eyes let his tears loose and they cascaded down his cheeks showing no signs of stopping.

"No." Yongguk stated firmly, "How many times do I have to tell you. It was never your fault. It was an accident. You couldn't have helped it anymore than I could have."

Suddenly Himchan seemed to spring to life again as he pulled away from Yongguk's chest. He gasped and Yongguk noticed the glint in his eyes. "Yongguk!", He said frantically, "Who we saw...over- over there next to Daehyun theres a chance that that could be...you don't really think..." There was new hope in Himchan's eyes, but it faded away quickly as he saw Yongguk shaking his head.

"Himchan. You and I both know that it's impossible." He looked firmly into the other's eyes. Yongguk hated to see Himchan this way. In fact the word 'hate' wouldn't have been enough to describe what he felt at the moment.

Himchan's eyes lost all the light in them as he lowered his head. "But--"

"Himchan." Yongguk cut him off. "He's gone."

Himchan let out a shuddering breath as reality hit him. His hands clenched tightly into fists. Yongguk pulled Himchan towards his chest again and he felt the shuddering breaths as Himchan fought to hold his tears in. He knew he brought up a painful memory, but he didn't want Himchan to get his hopes up. He didn't want Himchan to go through the pain again.

"Come on. We need to get out of here." Yongguk released Himchan from his arms, but kept one arm wrapped tightly around him. Himchan's face was still buried in the nook of Yongguk's neck, but he looked up when he felt Yongguk start to move forward.

"For now let's try and forget what we saw. Alright?" Himchan clenched his hands tighter, to the point of drawing blood.

"Himchan.." Yongguk softly spoke. "Please...for me...let's just wait and see."

He noticed Himchan's fisted hands and he reached over to gently unclench then. Himchan resisted a little at first, then let his hands become loose. Even after Yongguk's plea he couldn't forget, no matter how much he wanted to.

I know who I saw. I could recgonize him anywhere and that was definitely him.

Himchan resisted the urge to snap at Yongguk to tell him that he was wrong, instead he just stared ahead with a blank expression.

"Alright." he finally whispered brushing the remaining moisture out of his eyes. Yongguk turned his head towards him and gave him a small smile. Himchan was strong, but even the strongest person had their limit.

His head hurt and he felt dizzy, like he would collapse at any moment. It had all been to much, the onslaught of his past rushing forward was enough to make him drop to his knees. In fact that had already happened. The memories....they were still flowing freely in his mind, showing him images and pictures from his past. It took him years to lock them away and now they were back. Himchan was sure that they would haunt his dreams...just like before. Another memory flashed forward and Himchan clenched his eyes shut. As the memory passed he couldn't help but glance at the sky. It was an ironically beautiful day, there were no clouds in sight despite it being in the middle of fall. It looked nothing like the strom brewing in his heart.

As impossible as he knew the situation was, he knew his eyes weren't playing tricks on him. He was positive he knew who he saw, even if Yongguk didn't believe it, he did. But Himchan also knew that it would have taken some god- forsaken miracle to make what he wished for come true.

He gave a short, anguished laugh. God, the past was never going to let him go. All those years of keeping tight control. Himchan always prided himself in keeping up his cheerful, care-free attitude. Yet in a matter of seconds that control crumbled away as if it was never there. And now here he was living in the present, yet trapped in the memories of his past.

"Himchan," Yongguk whispered, interrupting him from his thoughts. "What are you thinking about?"

Himchan blinked and reached up a hand to wipe away a couple stray tears that slipped free before turning to meet Yongguk's gaze. He glanced around towards the park before replying.

"I don't need to answer that Yongguk. You already know the answer."

ͼ

Wait. Wait. Is that really true?

Aha yeah. I swear Jong up has his head up in the clouds most of the time. Hes like a lost puppy.

Daehyun found himself chuckling at Youngjae's description.

He sounds like a friend I have. I swear he's the craziest person you'll ever meet.

I'll beg to differ.

Youngjae gave a sly smile.

But why would you say that? You know it's not nice to talk about your friends that way.

Psh. Youngjae...you have no idea what I go through with him around.

Daehyun rolled his eyes to emphasize his point, but his laughter relvealed his true intentions and Youngjae laughed along with him.

The earlier events were completely forgotton as Daehyun found himself completely immersed in this new Youngjae. It was like someone had popped open a cap or a switch. Whatever the reason Youngjae seemed to be much more open and playful. And Daehyun was loving every second of it. He figured the scream from earlier was just some childern playing nearby and he was thinking too much of things...as usual.

He stole another glance at the younger, who was busy scribbling down another note. A gentle breeze fluttered by and playfully tousled Youngjaes hair and Daehyun's hands itched to run through the feathery, soft locks just once.

Daehyun was about to slap himself for thinking such thoughts until a small poke to his side awoke him from his daydream.

Hey, you know your lips form the most obvious pout when you daze out. You look exactly like my friend when you do that.

Daehyun smiled and decided to make his pout even more obvious.

I'll take that as a compliment.

He gave a small smirk.

And you're one to talk. I think you daze out more than me.

Daehyun saw Youngjae puff out his cheeks as he read the reponse, and again he had to suppress the urge from doing certain actions that would result in him getting hit.

Youngjae picked up his already uncapped black sharpie and thinning stack of sticky notes to write back his response. However before he could even write out one letter an excrutiating flash of pain went through his head and his sharpie dropped onto the oak bench with a clatter. Daehyun, who had been gazing at the younger gently, noticed the change right away. He quickly scooted closer, concern written clearly on his face.

"Hey Youngjae, whats wrong?" His voice trembled slightly as he saw how much pain the other seemed to be in. Youngjae was currently holding his head between his hands and he was bent down low in his seat. Daehyun could hear the short, gasping breaths the other took. Concerned Daehyun didn't hesitate to pull the other into his arms. He rubbed slow, soothing cirlces onto Youngjae's back and silently waited for the other boy to stop shaking.

After a couple minutes Youngjae stopped trembling and Daehyun could feel the deep breaths he took, a sign that he was calming down. Daehyun was just about to ask if the other was okay again, but before he had the chance Youngjae tensed in his arms. Before another second passed Youngjae shot up out of Daehyun's arms almost smacking Daehyun in the process. They met eyes for a split second and Daehyun just caught the blush that crept up onto Youngjae's cheeks before he turned away.

Daehyun opted to pull the younger close to him again, because it was obvious Youngjae was still shaken from what happened. He looked unsteady and his eyes darted around the park nervously as if he expected something to just pop out of the trees. But he chose against it deciding to scoot closer instead.

Hey what happened?

Youngjae looked up and was met with Daehyun's concerned face. Daehyun's brown eyes searching his face for any sort of clue or answer to his question.

It was nothing. Dont worry about it.

Daehyun frowned and scooted closer. Youngjae refused to meet his eyes.

That was not nothing. You were in obvious pain. Are sure you're okay?

I'm fine.

Do you want to tell me what happened?

No.

Daehyun was a little taken aback at Youngjae's abrupt response. He blinked trying to think of ways to lighten up the tense, awkward atmosphere. He figured he over stepped his boundaries and he didn't want to be the cause of stress for Youngjae. Daehyun was just about to apologize until his eyes caught the new sticky note laying inbetween them.

If I told you you wouldn't believe me.

Now Daehyun was confused. His eyes stared at the paper, then back at Youngjae, who was still gazing solemnly at the ground. Wouldn't believe him. Wouldn't believe him? Daehyun internally scoffed, but not in a smug way. It was just because Daehyun would believe anything Youngjae had to say in a heartbeat, no questions asked. It seemed like Daehyun fell for the younger boy deeper than he originally thought. Now he was determined to find out just what was going on with the other. "Youngjae." he called softly. When that didn't work he tried again, scooting closer (if even possible).

Youngjae, look at me.

Daehyun placed the note down and when he was positive Youngjae read it he reached out a hand to tilt the younger boys face towards his own. He looked straight into the chocolate brown eyes that he came to adore so much and very clearly spoke out what he had to say.

"Youngjae," Daehyun's eyes shone with a newfound emotion. "I know we just met and we're still pratically strangers, but yesterday and today the time I've spent with you is something truly different for me."

Daehyun moved his hand to grab a hold of Youngjae's hands. He interwined thier fingers, relieved when Youngjae didn't resist. He took that as a sign to continue. Daehyun took another breath and spoke again.

"I know this may sound crazy, hell what I'm thinking is crazy, but Youngjae you mean so much more to me than some random stranger in the park. You're more than someone to just pass the time with. You make my day whenever you smile. I can't help but think about you 24/7, to the point where I even got hit by a pen today in class! I-" Daehyun found himself stuttering. He was never good at expressing his emotions, even so he wasn't intending for his confession to turn into an actual love confession.

Daehyun averted his eyes and cleared his throat, hands still interwined with Youngjae's "I guess what I'm trying to say is...Youngjae I care for you and I want you to know that you can trust me with anything. I want you to know that I will believe anything you have to say, no questions asked...because-"

"because you're the first person to ever touch my heart like this and it wasn't by chance that we were able to meet here." Daehyun wanted to add, instead he kept his silent confession to himself.

With another cough and breath Daehyun looked up to meet Youngjae's gaze. He looked straight into the other's eyes and his eyes seemed to shine with his determination to get his message across.

"because I like you. I care for you and I would never do anything to hurt you."

At this time the wind chose to make itself known by sending a strong breeze through the park, shaking the trees and rustling the leaves. In turn the last part of Daehyun's confession was barely heard, if it was heard at all. Daehyun held his breath after speaking those words, after all he just admitted his love for a boy he only met yesterday. Call him crazy, but that's just how Daehyun was, a hopeless romantic who believed in love at first sight. He carefully observed Youngjae's face after he had spoken, unaware that the last part of his monologue was drowned out by the wind.

The said boy showed no signs of denying or accepting what Daehyun just said. If any Youngjae's face was one of mixed emotions, showing a mix of sorrow, frustration, and shock. Although the last one was expected. However as Daehyun kept staring at Youngjae's face he noticed it slowly changed into one of understanding and happiness? He wasn't sure. 

Youngjae just sat there. He kept his eyes averted; he refused to look Daehyun in the eyes, not after the shamful scene that just unfolded. Youngjae snapped his eyes shut and let out a shuddering breath. It had been so long since something like before happened and Youngjae thought he'd finally gotton rid of the painful headaches. Sure he'd get minor headaches here and there, but they were nothing compared to the one he had moments ago.

He had been getting the headaches for as long as he could remember, some were worse than others. To this day the cause was still unknown. But Youngjae didn't care that the cause was never found, the headaches made him weak and he hated feeling weak. It made people pity him and he didn't need their pity. He got plenty of that at school. Youngjae felt Daehyun tilt his chin up so his eyes would be met with the other's obviously worried gaze. Youngjae was planning on turning away once Daehyun let go of his face he wasn't ready to face him yet, but something in Daehyun's eyes made him stop.

Youngjae observed Daehyun's face as he spoke. His own eyes running over every little detail, until eventually they landed upon the same place they started. Youngjae was memesmerized to say the least by Daehyun's eyes, they seemed to shine with something he had yet to place a name for. Suddenly he felt a pair of feather soft hands intertwine with his own. Usually he would feel startled when somebody touched him, espically if it was by somebody he barely knew. But somehow he was alright with Daehyun holding his hands, in fact Youngjae was more than alright with it. It felt right with Daehyun interwining their fingers and holding their palms close. He saw Daehyun stutter and he had to admit it was the cutest thing he'd ever seen. A smile almost graced his face, but Youngaje kept it in keeping his face as emotionless as possible.

And when Daehyun turned away he thought that something was wrong, fearing it was something he caused, Youngjae was about to tear his hands away to write another note, urging Daehyun to continue. He didn't want Daehyun to stop, this was the first time he'd seen the other look so vulnerable, but in a good way. When Daehyun turned back and again they met eyes, Youngaje felt his breath stop midway.

His heart gave a thump.

Youngjae took in Daehyun's lips as he talked, observing the way they moved. The words flowing effortlessly out of his mouth. How badly he wanted to reach out and carasses those pair of lips. They were smooth, plump, and tinted a pretty pink, much like a girls, but Youngjae could care less. They were the prettiest pair of lips he had ever seen. He took in how every word, every syllable was able to flow out smoothly from Daehyun's mouth and he couldn't help but feel a tinge of jealously. Youngjae thought about what it would be like to have a pair of lips like Daehyun's and for a second his heart was filled with hope. Only his hope was shortlived as Youngjae was brought back to his harsh reality.

His hope was one that would never come true.

Youngjae realized Daehyun had stopped talking the moment his lips halted in movement. But he kept his neutral face expression wanting to observe Daehyun's reaction just a little longer. Youngjae took note of the way Daehyun's eyes seemed to shine, even after he delivered his monologue. They were filled with warmth, trust, and was that love he saw reflected across those brown orbs? Slowly, Youngjae let a small smile grace his lips as he came to his own realization.

Maybe it was time to open up his own heart and trust in Daehyun as much as Daehyun trusted in him.

Maybe it was okay to trust again.

Daehyun kept his eyes locked onto Youngjae's as he felt the other slowly disconnect their hands. He wished that he could have kept them connected a little while longer because he missed the warmth Youngjae's hands emitted. And Daehyun didn't miss the fact that their hands seemed to fit perfectly together, well at least to him.

He almost let out a sound of protest, but stopped himself because he didn't want to come off as clingy. Daehyun didn't miss the smile that suddenly appeared on Youngjae's face and he thought that his confession went through to the other, however his hope quickly faded when he saw Youngjae purse his lips in frustration. It seemed like the younger was mentally struggling with something, but Daehyun couldn't place his finger on what.

Taking Youngjae's frustration as a sign that he went too far, Daehyun was just about to scoot furthur away and think up a way to 'speak' with the younger again and hopefully he wouldn't come off as some creeper who went around declaring thier love for random strangers they barely knew. But Daehyun wasn't one of those people, he only hoped the sincerity in his actions and words depicted that enough. Just as Daehyun was on the verge of moving Youngjae placed an all to familiar piece of paper onto his lap.

Do you want to know why I love this park so much?

Surprise filled Daehyun's eyes as he read the note. He had to admit he was genuinely curious, but this wasn't what he expected at all. Was Youngjae not affected by what he just said? Regardless he went along with Youngjae's antics.

Why?

Youngjae's pen seemed to fly across the paper, as if his hand wasn't fast enough to keep up with his thoughts. He gave a small, sincere smile as he placed the next note.

Because it reminds me of a happier time in my life, when I didnt always feel like this.

Concerned Daehyun was about to open his mouth in protest, but was stopped when Youngjae reached over and gave his hand a squeeze.

No. Don't get me wrong. I don't have depression. It's......a little more complicated than that.

Youngjae trailed off and Daehyun gave the hesitating boy a poke in the side, urging him to continue. Youngjae jumped a little at the sudden jolt and turned to give Daehyun a playful glare. Saying through his expression that he wasn't planning on stopping here. There was still so much more to tell.

Daehyun just sat there silently, willingly and somehow the hard oak bench didn't seem so uncomfortable anymore.

Remember sometime earlier today when you asked to get to know more about me and I answered that I hardly knew anything about myself?

Daehyun blinked, his mind digging up the hazy memory despite it happening only hours ago. He gave Youngjae a small nod letting him know he remembered. Youngjae took a breath and continued.

Well I wasn't lying. Truth is...I don't remember the first 15 years of my life.

Youngjae could literally see Daehyun tense as he watched him read his note. In turn he tensed as well, holding his breath. Daehyun's mind was running a mile a minute as he tried to process what Youngjae just told him.

Wh-? Can't remember the first 15 years of-- How is that-- But wait Youngjae is 18 which means...

He did a little mental math.

Which means that Youngjae only remembers the past 3 years of his life?!

Shocked at the conclusion he came to, there was only one question running through Daehyun's mind at the moment.

What happened?

Youngjae let out the breath he was holding. Mentally thankful that Daehyun didn't freak out. It was hard for him to admit he only remembered a tiny fraction of his life and the rest was only a big blur to him. It was black on more black everytime he tried to remember. It frustrated Youngjae to no end, in fact there were no words to describe how he felt when he came to realize that he couldn't recgonize any of his friends or family members. He didn't even know his own name, his ability to process information was still there. In fact Youngjae was ahead of his grade by one year for certain subjects.  But the knowledge about his relationships with people was gone. Wiped clean, like an empty slate.

I really don't know. All I remember is waking up in a hospital room surrounded by people I didn't know.

Youngjae looked away as he remembered the dreadful moment when he woke up, stark in a hospital gown and surrounded by complete strangers all looking concerned in one way or another. It was the first clear memory he had of his new life and it wasn't pleasant to say the least. It was a miracle he hadn't gone insane by now.

Is this the reason why you don't talk?

Youngjae was startled to see Daehyun's reponse. He wasn't expecting that kind of question and he almost let out a laugh. He reached over and gave Daehyun a small reassuring smile.

No, there's actually another reason to why I don't talk, but that's another story for another time.

Daehyun read Youngjae's response and looked up just in time to see Youngjae's lips give a small twitch at the ends. In actuality Daehyun wanted to demand Youngjae tell him here and now the reason as to why he was silent. But as he gazed at the younger boy he knew that he had no right to go and pry. After all Daehyun could only imagine how much trust Youngjae was putting in him at the moment by telling him all this. Daehyun realized that this must have been what Youngjae was debating about earlier in his mind. He resisted the urge to pull Youngjae closer and comfort him while he told his story. Daehyun kept his hands still by his sides and let Youngjae continue.

After waking up I was sent to go live with the people I only assumed to be my parents.

You have no idea how frustrating it is to not be able to recgonize your own parents or friends. Having to start from nothing all over again.

Daehyun could only imagine the pain and frustration Youngjae went through. That frustration was clear in his eyes.

But I managed.

And Youngjae seemed to visably calm down, his body becoming less tense. His eyes taking on a more gentle tone.

I went back to school and met two people that really helped keep me sane these past 2 years.

Daehyun's head snapped up at this comment and he saw the gentle look Youngjae had on his face.

Are these the two people you told me about?

Youngjae smiled and nodded as he met eyes with Daehyun. It was obvious how much those two people meant to him. And Daehyun felt a pull at his heart. He never knew he could feel jealous over two boys he never even met before.

Yeah. Everything was fine until......the headaches started to appear.

The pain was evident on Youngjae's features as he recalled the memories. Daehyun could only watch on in silence, hand reaching up in an attempt to rub soothing circles onto the others back.

I don't even know where they come from or why they happen.

Even the doctors said there was nothing wrong. That they would go away eventually.

But they never did. They got less severe as time passed, but they never went away.

Daehyun did his best to try and comfort the other, but there was only so much he could do. Youngjae's hands were shaking and the younger had squeezed his eyes shut. After a couple moments he reopened his eyes and continued. Although his hands weren't quite as stable as before.

And recently pictures started popping up with them too. One minute I would be fine the next I end up on my knees shaking, hyperventilating.

I can't even make sense of them because I only get bits and pieces. I feel like their trying to tell me something.

Like an important part of my past and its more than frustrating not being able to put the pieces together.

Youngjae felt his eyes become more watery than he would like and as much as he hated crying he couldn't help the few tears that did slip free. Frustration wouldn't be enough to describe how he felt. Having bits and pieces of his past pop up then disappear was more than aggravating. He was fine for a while, he thought he could actually heal and move on. Losing one's memory was painful enough, so why did his mind still want to play tricks on him and torture him with something he knew he would never be able to get back.

It was torture- plain and simple.

Daehyun didn't hesitate to move, once he saw the tears slip free of Youngjae's eyes. Now instead of rubbing circles onto Youngjae's back, he was sitting side by side with the younger and he had reached out an arm to drape over the other's shoulders. Eventually Daehyun pulled Youngjae closer till he felt soft auburn hair come into contact with his shoulder. He softly rubbed Youngjae's arm with the arm that was draped over his shoulders. It tore at his heart to see Youngjae like this and Daehyun had to stop himself from interrupting because he knew this was something Youngjae had to say. He was grateful that Youngjae trusted in him so much, but he felt guilty knowing that he was the cause of Youngjae's tears at the moment. He never meant for the Youngjae to recall such painful memories, yet there was no way he could have known beforehand. This would have happened eventually, and better sooner than later.

Surprisingly enough Youngjae didn't pull away and just let Daehyun comfort him. It felt nice to be in the arms of someone so warm.

But there was one thing I was able to put together.

Daehyun kept rubbing circles onto Youngjae's arm, patiently waiting for the other to continue. Youngjae's head was nestled inbetween the crook of Daehyun's neck, fitting there with no trouble at all. Daehyun's head in turn was leaned on top of Youngjae's quietly observing everything the younger as writing.

To any passerby they would have looked like a pair of lovers spending the afternoon in a autumn colored park.

Although it was never clear, everytime I had a piece of my past pop up there was a man. I've never seen his face or heard his voice, but I just have this feeling he's someone close to me.

Somebody important.

The only thing I know is that he's older than me. At least that's the feeling I get.

Youngjae turned and buried his head into Daehyun's neck inhaling his scent. His nose was filled with the scent of honey and Daehyun's natural body odor. He had to admit it was a deadly combination. Daehyun's scent alone was enough to make him dizzy to his knees. He didn't know why he chose to tell Daehyun all this. Even though the two of them only met yesterday something inside him was telling him that this was right. Him, here- lying in Daehyun's arms his head inbetween the others neck and shoulders- this was right. Daehyun on the otherhand wondered where Youngjae was his entire life. He'd hugged a lot of people in his short lifetime, a majority of them caused by crazed fan girls, even then those were forced upon him. But none of them felt as right as when he was holding Youngjae, even if it wasn't a full on hug. The way Youngjae fit into the curve of his body and the way his head fit snugly inbetween his neck and shoulder- everything about it was right and perfect.

Moving on, remember when I said this park reminds me of a happier time?

Daehyun gave a nod, his head brushing against Youngjae's auburn hair.

The reason why is because whenever I'm here I feel closer to him.

I feel like this park is somehow connected with him.

At this Youngjae gave a short, anguished laugh and removed himself from Daehyun's grasp shaking his head slightly. His face showed no regret as he moved away. In fact Youngjae seemed to look on with a lighter heart. He picked up the sharpie and wrote one last note.

Well...now you know. That's my story. Pity isn't it? Someone like me.

Daehyun let Youngjae twist himself loose, even if every fiber of his being screamed for him not to.  He let his eye graze over the note and now it was his turn to feel frustrated.

Pity? No.

His eyes were fierce as he stared right into Youngjae's questioning ones.

I think you're amazing Youngjae having gone through all that and still come out as strong as you are.

Thank you for telling me.

The two shared a mutual gaze and with that Daehyun let out a smile corners of his mouth turning upwards. Youngjae seemed to visably relax as he sunk lower into the bench and lazily crossed his arms. Daehyun's smile turned into one of gentle admirance. He would never had thought Youngjae went through all that and was still going through it. He would never be able to imagine what he would do if he went through the same. The thought made him shiver and admire Youngjae all the more. The boy that had stolen his heart was stronger in ways he never could have imagined and that made him even more amazing in Daehyun's eyes.

Now Daehyun was thinking it really was fate they met that day. He should really thank Himchan than.

As Daehyun watched Youngjae with a thoughtful eye he mentally made a promise to him.

Youngjae you're strong, but even the strongest person needs help sometimes. I plan to be that person. I'll be your rock, your support. Thank you for trusting in me Youngjae. One day I'll show to you just how much you mean to me.

It was a promise he planned to keep.

ͼ

Daehyun yawned as he settled himself down in the swirly chair located near his desk. The bored boy blew a puff of air up towards his bangs making them shift temporairly out of the way only to come flitting back down again a moment later. It had only been a couple hours since he and Youngjae went their seperate ways and already it was a couple hours too many.

Swiveling around in his chair Daehyun reached into his pocket and fished out his phone. He clicked on a button and immediately he was greeted with Youngjae's smiling face tucked cutely next to his. Daehyun smiled at the picture as he recalled the last couple moments the two of them had together.

"Hey hey Youngjae!" Daehyun decided to shout. Youngjae immediately jolted upright arms falling from his chest as he felt Daehyun shake at his shoulders. He ly to immediately be met with a very bouncy Daehyun. Youngjae was only left to wonder where the Daehyun from 5 minutes ago went.

"Hey lets take a picture together yeah?" Daehyun's words literally flew out of his mouth before Youngjae even had the chance to comprehend what was happening. The next thing Daehyun knew Youngjae was glaring playfully at him and giving him a smack in the arm.

Yah. Yah. Did you forget? Sticky notes.

Youngjae gave Daehyun's arm another teasing smack. Daehyun sheepishly turned away and rubbed the back of his head. In the excitement of his new idea he'd forgotton he promised the other that they would talk using the little pieces of paper. Quickly he transferred his thoughts to the small square sheet.

Hey Youngjae. Lets take a some pictures together yeah? ^^

Youngjae blinked at the note as his mind tried to comprehend what he was reading. He tilted his head as if a new angle would somehow change what he was reading. Now he was confused. Where did serious Daehyun go? He had just spent the last hour or so pouring his heart out and this was the reaction he got? Shaking his head Youngjae found it hard to believe.

"Come on. Come on." Daehyun ushered not giving the younger boy a chance to protest. He swiftly maneuvered Youngjae so that they were side by side again and after making sure Youngjae wouldn't move. Daehyun pulled out his phone from his back pocket and proceeded to set up the camera.

"Say Kimchi!"

Daehyun smiled again as he ran his hand over a picture of him and Youngjae smiling together, both of them making peace signs towards the camera. He was glad Youngjae was able to smile again after such a depressing mood. After all the boy had enough to deal with already, and Daehyun wanted to distract him even if it was only temporary. Chuckling at his new wallpaper Daehyun tossed the phone onto his bed and proceeded to give his arms a much needed stretch.

Today had been amazing to say the least and he'd gotton what he wanted- to get closer to Youngjae. Although he never expected what Youngjae had to say was that- Daehyun couldn't find the words. Daehyun pulled his arms in again and placed them atop his swirly chair. His head was running through what Youngjae had revealed about himself to him again. Even after seeing and hearing what Youngjae was going through Daehyun still found it hard to believe. It wasn't like he didn't believe it because he knew that things like that were definitely possible, it was just hard to wrap his mind around. Never the less it made him see Youngjae as an even more amazing person than he originally thought. And his smile grew wider as he thought about their promise to meet again tomorrow.

Daehyun's eyes softly closed as he let his mind drift.

Let's see today's homework was...was...

His eyes snapped open.

"Oh shi--itake mushrooms!!" Daehyun almost cursed as he remembered that he had homework from his music composition class and he had no idea what it was. Blame it on a certain auburn haired boy to make him daze off during class.

Sighing Daehyun left his swirly chair and made his way to his bed fishing out his phone. His hand went through all the motions pushing the buttons to call a certain black haired male.

Ring. Ring. Ring.

Daehyun furrowed his eyebrows. It wasn't like Himchan to not pick up. He knew his sometimes over protective best friend would pick up after the first or second ring if it was him calling.

Ring.

Click.

"Hello?" Himchan's voice could be heard clearly over the other end.

Daehyun gave a mental sigh of relief, Himchan had answered just before the call was going to go to voicemail.

"Hey hyung!"

"Oh. Hey Daehyun."

Daehyun frowned but went on.

"What are you up to?" Genuine curiosity was clear in Daehyun's voice.

"Nothing really." came the reply.

Daehyun pursed his lips, but didn't say anything more.

"So what did you call me for?" There was something off about Himchan's voice.

"Uhh...oh right," Daehyun stuttered. "What was the homework for our music composition class again? I kind of dazed off during class...aha"

Daehyun expected some kind of tease to be thrown his way but instead all he got was a, "Oh class uhh right...umm .." and Daehyun could hear papers rustling in the background along with some random mumbling he couldn't quite make out.

Finally Himchan came on the line again. "We have to compose a rough draft for the upcoming final. Says here it has to be an original song."

"Oh right." Daehyun answered relieved. "Thanks Himchan hyung."

"Yeah now if thats all..."

"Wait!" Daehyun interjected. Something was up with Himchan. Daehyun was positive. He normally was much much more playful and teasing. Where did his quirky best friend go?

"Himchan," he spoke dropping all formalities "Is something wrong?"

There was a pause as Himchan tried to figure out his answer.

"What?!" came the reply. "Psh Daehyun what are you talking about? How can anything be wrong. I'm fine."

Daehyun remained skeptical as he answered. "Really? Are you positive?"

"Yes," Himchan answered. "Now go do your homework before I have to come over and kick your to make you do it."

With this Daehyun let out a sigh of relief, maybe it had just been his imagination, but his Himchan seemed to be back. Teasing and all.

Laughing Daehyun answered with a "Roger that hyung. Night."

"Night."

With a sigh Himchan dropped his phone down in front of him. His smile disappearing as quick as it had appeared. Himchan lowered his head onto his desk and ran an agitated hand through his short black hair. In all actuality everything was not fine. His mind was still aching due to the events of earlier in the afternoon.

Even after Yongguk's reassurances Himchan still wasn't reassured. He was positive his eyes didn't lie, he had 20/20 vision for crying out loud. Letting out another breath Himchan lifted his head and immediately his eyes landed on a certain object he didn't want to see.

With glassy eyes Himchan made his way towards the bookshelf where the picture frame stood. He took a hold of the photo with trembling hands. His eyes almost giving way as he ran a finger over one particular face. In that photo stood two young boys, one obviously older than the other by a couple years. The two boys had their arms around each other's shoulders and each was smiling at the camera. The younger of the two was flashing up a peace sign, showing off his bright smile. While the other was more conservative smiling gently at the camera, but looking just as happy nonetheless.

The two boys were pratically the same height, in fact if it wasn't for their hair colors it would be hard to tell them apart. One of the boys had short black hair, while the other had bright, blond hair almost as bright as the sun.

Himchan ran his hand over the blond boy's face. He had to choke back a sob that threatened to make itself known.

One tear slipped free and it landed right next to the younger's face.

"Youngsoo," Himchan whispered another tear slipping free. "I'm sorry."

With that Himchan clutched the photo closer finally letting his tears loose. Nothing more could be heard as the night slowly closed in.