Daehyun anxiously paced the hallway outside Himchan's room. He twisted his hands together and glanced at the door every now and then half expecting Himchan to walk out and claim that everything was just a joke. He wouldn't be surprised if that happened, but Daehyun knew that was far from the truth. When Yongguk called him saying he had found Himchan never did Daehyun think he would be going to the hospital to see his best friend. He sprinted to the location only to be stopped by a nurse telling him Himchan had collapsed from stress. He was currently resting and it was advised he not have any more visitors. Daehyun felt his vision go blurry and the extra moisture that misted over his eyes wasn't helping.

How could this have happened?

While he was out playing with Youngjae, Himchan was somewhere hurting by himself. His knees suddenly felt wobbly and he collapsed onto the nearest chair. Daehyun strangled back a sob clawing its way up his throat. When he blinked his eyes gave way to a couple small tear drops. They pattered soundlessly onto the ceramic flooring. He should have looked harder for Himchan. Then maybe Himchan wouldn't be sitting in a hospital bed while he sat outside staring at the door to his room. Hundreds of questions ran through his mind as he waited in the flourescent lighted hallway, but he trusted Himchan to be alright. He trusted Himchan. He trusted his best friend. One of the older nurses passed by and gave Daehyun a small smile of reassurance before heading into Himchan's room. Daehyun sniffed and straightened out the wrinkles in his shirt. It took everything he had not to follow in after her. Daehyun gave a tired sigh and rubbed at his eyes to get rid of the extra tears. Even though he knew they would be red and puffy after if he did, he didn't care. He just wanted Himchan to be alright. It seemed like forever until Daehyun heard the distinct sound of a sliding door being opened. He looked up to see the same nurse coming out of the room. She was just sliding the door closed when Daehyun nearly tripped running up to her.

"How is he? Is he awake?" he frantically questoned.

He knew he sounded desperate, but he couldn't help it. The nurse must have sensed it because she gave him a comforting smile in response.

"He's awake now and a little disorientated. But he's recovering just fine."

Her words let Daehyun breath out a sigh of relief as the adrenaline in his veins slowly ebbed away. Himchan was going to be okay.

"Can- Can I go see him?" Daehyun asked as he wrung his hands together.

"Go ahead," the nurse nodded towards the door. "but try not to give him too much excitement. His body's still recovering."

Daehyun quickly thanked the woman, then grasped the handle to the door.

"My life for the past three years has been a lie. A LIE. I've been living a lie.-"

Daehyun's eyes widned and his hand stopped mid-pull.

"They had their reasons-"

"You knew. You knew!-"

He in a breath and unconsciounsly grasped the handle tighter. That was Himchan's voice. Yet, why did it sound so pained? And who was the other person in the room? Didn't the nurse say there weren't any visitors allowed? Daehyun frowned. The other voice sounded awfully familiar.

"Channie please, you don't know-"

"You're right, I don't know. I don't know a damn thing!-"

Daehyun knew it wasn't right to eavesdrop, but it wasn't like he had been intentionally trying too. He didn't think there was another person in the room. If that was the case then why did the nurse not allow him in? The frown on his face deepened. The second person had called his hyung with a specific nickname. There was only one person he knew of that called Himchan by that name. Then it hit him and he accidently  the door from realization. The grip Daehyun had on the door handle loosened and now his frown was one of confusion.

What didn't Himchan know and why did Yongguk sound so desperate?

Finally, Daehyun couldn't take it anymore and slid the door open. It creaked and resisted a little as he pushed, but it provided enough time for him to take a breath and peer into the room. His eyes caught Himchan's on the bed and he had to blink back the tears. Daehyun took a hesitant step forward.

"Hyung?"

Despite his previous worry he couldn't help the watery smile that curved up his lips when he saw Himchan. He was there and he was breathing. There was no denying the relief that flooded through him. A sigh left his lips and Daehyun felt his shoulders sag as he let the air flow out of his body. His eyes soon shifted from Himchan to the figure standing besides him on the bed. The expression the older had on caused Daehyun's new found relief to disappear as quickly as it had come. Yongguk stood there with the most pained expression he had ever seen. What bothered Daehyun the most though was how hard he was he was trying hard to hide it. No matter how Yongguk angled his head Daehyun could still make out the thin trail of tears that streaked his cheeks. Now that the previous relief of seeing Himchan again had worn off Daehyun could sense there wasn't something quite right with the atmosphere of the room. It felt forced and extremely tense. His gaze went back to Himchan and now that he had taken a second look he could see his hyung's expression almost mirrored that of Yongguk's. Only Himchan made no move to hide his tears as he stared steadily at the sheets.

"Hyung, is everything alright?" Daehyun tentatively asked.

The only response he got was a silent one as Himchan turned his head away. Though most of the time a silent Himchan was preferrable this was the one time Daehyun wished he could hear his hyung talk back to him. Even if it was in that snarky voice he hated so much. Seeing Himchan so lifeless did more than disconcert him. His silence only served to heighten Daehyun's growing discomfort. Rather than risk another question Daehyun swallowed heavily and allowed his gaze to lock with the one other person in the room. His eyes rounded in question and worry in hopes that Yongguk would provide some sort of clarification.

Yongguk sniffed and casually tried to wipe away the tears on his cheeks. "Hello there Daehyun, are you here to see Himchan?"

Daehyun noticed how he used Himchan's full name instead of calling him by his nickname and how he seemed to angle himself away from the side of the bed when he turned to speak to him. Out of the corner of his eyes Daehyun saw Himchan fist his hands into the sheets as Yongguk spoke.

"Well," Daehyun hesitated. "I came to see how Himchan hyung was doing. I didn't realize- that you would be here. But thank you, by the way, for calling."

Yongguk blinked, then nodded his head in understanding. "Right, of course. You had the right to know."

"Right. Well um," Daehyun his lips unsure of what to make of the tense atmosphere. "Then do you mind if-"

"Get out of here," Himchan interrupted. "Both of you."

Daehyun blinked and took a step back at the abrupt command. It was the first time Himchan had spoken since Daehyun came into the room. The tone of his voice was something akin to ice creeping up his skin. Already, Daehyun could feel the goosebumps forming on his arms from that one sentence.

"Ex- excuse me?" He was tempted to run up to Himchan and demand why he was acting the way he was.

"I said get out. Leave! Did you not hear the first time?"

Himchan shot a glare in his direction and Daehyun couldn't help the gasp that escaped his lips. It was the first time he had ever seen Himchan look so furious. Sure, there were moments where Himchan would get quote on quote mad at him for his endless teasing, but they would always laugh it out at the end. Himchan's angry expressions were joking at most. They weren't like how he looked now. The phrase 'if looks could kill' never seemed more real. Daehyun could only gape in confusion as he tried to make sense of Himchan's behavior. Yongguk turned towards Himchan and opened his mouth to say something, but at the last minute he decided against it and lowered his head instead.

"I'll leave first Cha- Himchan and let you talk with Daehyun." Yongguk responded quietly.

Himchan didn't even flinch as Yongguk brushed past him. He was quick to move across the room to gather his bag and belongings. When he was done Daehyun expected him to leave without another word, but instead he walked up to where he stood. The words that left his lips were barely audible and Daehyun had to crane his head in closer to catch them.

"I'm sorry you had to see this, but please don't take what Himchan says to heart," Yongguk whispered, eyes downcast. "He's hurting right now and could really use somebody to rely on."

Daehyun knitted his eyebrows together at Yongguk's words. Yougguk's mouth was set in a grim line though his eyes shone with worry. He glanced up with pained eyes and whispered one last sentence.

"Please take care of him."

And before Daehyun could say a word Yongguk was out the door without so much as a glance back. His footsteps grew fainter and fainter with each step away from the room. Daehyun stood rooted in his spot. His eyes were wide with question and worry. When he snuck a glance at Himchan on the bed a flash of panic flew through him, although it passed by too quickly for him to dwell on the feeling. Another moment passed before Daehyun plucked up the courage step towards where Himchan lay. Each step caused his head to swarm hundreds more questions, but he knew now wasn't the time to be asking those. He found Himchan with his eyes closed in the same exact position as before. Daehyun was close enough now that if he took another couple steps he would be able to touch the side of the bed.

"Hyung," Daehyun said with a quiet voice. "are you okay?"

"I thought I told you to leave." Himchan shot back.

Daehyun swallowed and clenched and unclenched his hands. He took another hesitant step closer to the bed. Himchan's eyes were still closed so he couldn't see how his behavior was affecting Daehyun as he continously kept his lips and fiddling with his fingers.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?" Daehyun asked nervously.

Himchan sighed and slowly started rubbing his temples with his hands. "Go home Daehyun," he demanded.

Daehyun in a breath as his hands clenched into fists.

"You know I can't do that. What's wrong hyung? Do you know my heart nearly stopped when Yongguk called me?"

Daehyun did his best to keep his voice from shaking, but he couldn't help the slight tremor at the end when he recalled the phone call he got from Yongguk. The feeling of dread that spread through him was something he never wanted to relive.

"I was worried about you," he finished with a whisper. He knew Himchan heard if the way his lips twitched was any indication.

"Well don't," Himchan opened his eyes and shot a scathing look towards where Daehyun stood. "I don't need your worry."

"Hyu-," Daehyun took a step closer. "what happened? Why are you like this? I'm here because I care about you. When you disappeared on me I spent hours looking for you. You wouldn't answer my calls or texts and you weren't in any of the places we usually go. I even went to Yongguk and asked him. But even he didn't know where you were. Then when I get a call from Yongguk saying you had collapsed from exhaustion I came rushing over as soon as I could only to find you and Yongguk in tears. Tell me, how am I not supposed to worry?"

"You're wasting your time," Himchan said again averting his gaze away. "It's none of your business and I already told you. I don't need your worry."

"Don't say that," Daehyun dug his nails into the palm of his hand. "We're friends and this is what friends do. They help each other even if it's just-"

"What part of 'I don't want your worry' don't you understand?" Himchan growled. "You wouldn't get it Daehyun, so just go. I don't need you here."

"No," Daehyun's voice wavered. "I'm not going, not until you tell me what's wrong. Hyung, what happened? Maybe I can help-"

He spoke slowly to try and control the tremor in his voice and he prayed he wasn't shaking as much as he thought he was. Inside, he couldn't help but shrink away from Himchan's words. He didn't know what to make of the Himchan sitting in front of him and the thought terrified him beyond belief.

"Stop it Daehyun! It's none of your god damn business!" Himchan yelled.

Daehyun felt the air whip out of his lungs and he stood there with shell shocked eyes.

"Stop trying to act like you know everything and that have all the solutions in the world, because you don't. There are some things you just can't solve and this is one of them. I can't- I can't take it anymore. And it's not like you would even be able to come close to understanding," Himchan spat. "You've pratically been born with a silver spoon in your mouth and don't give me that crap about dealing with your popularity. That's nothing compared to what I've been going through. You know nothing about me Daehyun and you never will."

While Himchan caught his breath Daehyun felt a thin layer of moisture cover his eyes. He never knew Himchan was capable of saying such words and for a second Daehyun didn't believe he actually had. But the seething look in Himchan gave him told him differently.

"What?" Daehyun whispered appalled. "H-hyung, how could you say that? We've been friends for so long."

Himchan sighed tiredly. "Face it Daehyun you were so deserate for someone who didn't come off as fake or shallow that you latched onto the first person who approached you without the intentions of exploiting your popularity."

"Is- is that what you really think?" Daehyun couldn't help his voice from breaking at the end.

Himchan smirked, but it wasn't any kind of smirk Daehyun had seen Himchan do before. There was no playfulness in the way his eyes glinted as hard and cold as stone.

"You're just like the rest of them. You only care about yourself."

Daehyun was speechless as he stood there with his mouth agape and body stiff. His eyes had glossed over with fresh tears and it was a miracle they hadn't started cascading down his cheeks. He wanted to ask why Himchan was saying those words. He really did, but for some reason when he opened his mouth no words could come out. Perhaps the reason why was because there was an overwhemling pain right by the center of his chest. His heart was breaking. He let out a shuddering breath and fought to keep the tears at bay. Daehyun snuck a glance up at Himchan again and was surprised to see the other with his eyes clenched shut and hands fisted tightly within the sheets. Daehyun wanted to reach out to him. It hurt to see Himchan in so much pain when he was so used to Himchan's teasing smiles and joyful laughter. But after what he said earlier, the hand Daehyun reached out slowly curled into a fist and dropped back to his side. His eyes bore holes into the tiled flooring.

"It's all your fault Daehyun," Himchan choked out, his voice breaking the aching silence in the room. "If it wasn't for you none of this would have happened."

Despite the tears staining his cheeks Daehyun frowned in confusion at Himchan's words. He snapped his head up to retort only to freeze at the sight before him. Himchan was in the same position as before, only this time Daehyun wasn't the only one with the shiny, tear streaked face. His eyes caught the way Himchan's shoulders seemed to shake harder with each passing second.

"It's all your fault," Himchan cried. "Why did you have to leave that day? If you hadn't gone to that damned park you wouldn't have met Youngsoo and then I wouldn't have to be suffering this pain."

Himchan cried harder at the last sentence. The tears were flowing down in a steady stream as he struggled to form words.

"I-I wouldn't have found out," Himchan gasped for breath. "I would still have been- Yongguk and I would still have been-"

"Hyung, wha-" Daehyun managed to stutter out. His eyes blinked in confusion. The pain from before seemed to dull down in favor of finding out the meaning behind Himchan's words.

"I didn't have to know. I didn't!" Himchan cried louder. "Then I wouldn't have to be hurting so much."

Daehyun couldn't stop the flow of his own tears as he watched his beloved hyung and friend sob before him. He didn't know Himchan had been hurting this much and Daheyun bit back his own cry when he rememberd how out of it Himchan had been that particular morning. He knew there was something else Himchan wasn't telling him, but like a fool he didn't bother to find out what. Maybe if he did then Himchan wouldn't be sitting in a hospital bed before him.

"Youngsoo. Youngsoo. I cared about him so much." Himchan struggled to form the words. His breaths came out in short gasps. "Then you had to go meet him. Why Daehyun? Why? Were you so intent on shattering the thin veil of happiness I had? Why did he have to be there? I thought he was dead. He was dead. I don't get it! I don't!"

Himchan was rambling now.

"I was just starting to heal. I thought everything was going to be okay. Then he had to appear. So many lies. So much pain. The pain." A rather loud sob broke thorugh Himchan's lips. This one did more than tear at the strings lining Daehyun's heart. "It hurts. It hurts so much. I just want it to stop. Please make it stop. Youngsoo. Youngsoo. I need to see him. I need to!"

"Hyung- please j-just try to calm down. P-please," Daehyun's voice shook from the intensity of it all. He was tempted to call the nurse, but he wanted even more so to find out what was making Himchan hurt so much.

Suddenly Himchan seemed to stop mumbling to himself and turned sharply towards where stood. For a moment Daehyun was worried the action would give his hyung whiplash, but that seemed far from it as Himchan's eyes seemed to darken and his lips thinned to a straight line.

"You," It was a darastic change from the anguished tone from before. "you know where he is."

Daehyun's eyes widened.

"Tell me! Tell me where he is please!" the desparately pained voice was back from before. Himchan grabbed a hold of Daehyun's shirt and pulled him closer to the bed. His nails dug deep into the fabric of his shirt and clung on for dear life. "P-please. I just- he was the only family I had."

Daehyun relaxed slightly enough to ask what that meant. "What do you mean?"

"Youngsoo," Himchan whispered. He had closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against Daehyun's chest. "was the only family I had. The first person I ever came to truly love. When- when he was taken away from he I thought I was going to die. And it was all my fault. All my fault."

Himchan rambled on and as he did Daehyun could feel the tears soaking through the thin material of his shirt dampening his chest and skin. It took all his effort to pull Himchan away and look into his eyes. What he saw there was something that would haunt his dreams forever.

"H-hyung listen to me," Daehyun his lips determined to get the right words out. "Whatever you did. It wasn't your fault. It's not your fault. You'll be alright. You're going to be okay."

It was a futile attempt to get Himchan to calm down. From the way his grip on Daehyun's shirt seemed to get tighter and his sobs started to become louder Daehyun knew this was far from over.

"No- No- I just want it to stop. Tell me where he is Daehyun. Why won't you tell me? Why?"

"I-I don't know who you you're talking about. Please hyung-" Daehyun was frantically trying to wipe away the tears on Himchan's cheeks.

"No. No! Stop lying to me. Why does everybody lie to me? You're just like the rest of them! Tell me where Youngsoo is!"

Before Daehyun could respond the door suddenly flew open and two nurses swiftly walked in. Daehyun recgonized one of them as the same one that had been in Himchan's room earlier. She took one look at him and spoke sternly.

"I think it's best if you leave now." Her eyes gazed at him in understanding, but her tone was clear.

Daehyun gulped, but found he couldn't argue with her. Himchan's hands were pried away from him as the two of them got to work calming him down. It seemed Himchan wasn't too happy about the seperation as he struggled and screamed to get out. Youngsoo. Youngsoo. Youngsoo. That was all Daehyun could make out before the nurses quickly put him to sleep. The whole ordeal was starting to give him a headache. His head started to throb as he thought back to Himchan's words and his alreadly swollen red eyes started to water again at the rememberance of Himchan's other words to him. He sniffed and rubbed at his eyes.

The same nurse from before came up to him a placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. "It looks like you've both been through a lot. Why don't you go home and rest. We've got him taken care of here."

She offered Daehyun a gentle smile. A smile which only brought more tears to his eyes as he nodded his head in understanding. So much had happened in the past hour. He just wanted to make sense of it all. On his way out of the hospital Daehyun couldn't help but sneak one last glance back at the doors. His head pounded painfully and it hurt whenever he moved his eyes too fast, but he really didn't want to leave, not when Himchan had been so distressed. Not when there were so many unanswered questions. Daehyun was just about to turn away before his eyes suddenly strayed to a figure sitting, hunched over, by the side of the door. There was something strangely familiar about the figure and when Daehyun squinted his eyes he realized exactly why.

It was Yongguk.

But why was Yongguk there? Didn't he leave? Then as if he knew he was being watched Yongguk raised his head and met Daehyun's gaze. Daehyun knew his eyes were still glassy from before and the redness of them could probably be seem from miles away. Yongguk didn't look much better. Daehyun took a step toward Yongguk on instinct. Maybe, maybe he knew what was going on. Maybe he could help. But then the conversation he overheard between him and Himchan flashed forward in his memory and Daehyun froze in his steps. Clenching his hands into fists Daehyun willed himself to break the stare and turn away. His footsteps echoed louder in his ears the furthur he kept walking.

The sound of cars sounded distant as Daehyun walked along the cemented path. Even the constant movement of people around him wasn't enough to snap him out of his stupor. He didn't know how long he had been walking. All that was on his mind was what happened in the hospital room with Himchan. Everything had seemed fine before. So now why did everything feel so out of control? Daehyun swiped at his eyes as he felt them start to glaze over with a fresh batch of tears. He didn't understand and it frustrated him that he wasn't getting any anwers. He felt so useless standing there while Himchan was yelling at him things he didn't know.

It hurt. Daehyun stopped walking and held his hand over his heart. It really did.

Himchan had mentioned somebody named Youngsoo. In all the years Daehyun's been friends with Himchan he had never heard him mention anybody along the lines of Youngsoo or who he was. Then again, Daehyun let his mind wander, the more he thought about it the more he realized that he didn't really know much about who Himchan was before they met. Daehyun never asked and Himchan never brought it up. Back at the hospital Himchan all but screamed at him that he was with holding information from him. He begged Daehyun to tell him where Youngsoo was. He didn't want to hurt anymore. It broke Daehyun's heart to see his best friend like that, but what could he do when he had no idea who or what Himchan was talking about. Tell him where Youngsoo was? He didn't even know who Youngsoo was. Himchan claimed they met before, at a park, but how could that be possible? The only person Daehyun met at the park was- Youngjae. Daehyun's eyes widened in realization. But no, no Youngjae was different. There was no way he could be the one Himchan was talking about. Was there? Daehyun squeezed his eyes shut an rubbed little circles around his temples. His head hurt from all the information flying around inside and the more Daehyun thought about it the more confused he got. None of it made any sense.

Himchan was the one person he could go to whenever Daehyun felt like exploding at the world. His joyful, slightly sarcastic personality was just what Daehyun needed after a long day of school and stress. Now it looked like the Himchan he once knew was nowhere to be found. Daehyun wondered if he would ever come back. His lips trembled at the thought and suddenly Daehyun couldn't help the few tears that slipped free past the corners of his eyes. Not wanting people to stare Daehyun did the only thing he could think of. He ran. He didn't care where he ran to, just as long as he ran somewhere. Somewhere away from the painful realization that the Himchan he came to know could very well not have been the real Himchan at all.

Compared to how much Himchan knew about him Daehyun knew next to nothing at all and the realization was heart breaking.

Without warning Daehyun smacked head first into a solid mass. The man grunted out a harsh verbal warning, but continued on his way. Mumbling an apology Daehyun sniffed and wiped at his eyes. As Daehyun stood there gulping in air after such extreme running he noticed just where he ran to. Trees of red, orange, and yellow greeted his eyes and before him was the one place Daehyun had become so fond of. However, the sight only caused his eyes to fill with more tears as images of Youngjae and Himchan filled his mind. Himchan's words mixed with memories of Youngjae and him in the park flashed forward like a slide show, showing one memory then another and another. There was a storm brewing in the depths of Daehyun's mind and he could already feel the headache creeping forward.

Stumbling forward Daehyun managed to make his way toward the little bench he spent so much of his time at. It was empty at the moment the second of its occupants currently absent. He slumped down onto the wooden bench and allowed himself one glance around the area. What once was a beautiful and calming scene now only served to stir up furthur turmoil in his heart. Leaning forward Daehyun rested his elbows on his knees and placed his head inbetween his hands. Thankfully there didn't seem to be anybody around, now within the safety of his past haven Daehyun allowed himself to let one tear out then another and another and another- until there were no more tears to be shed.

Somehow the park just felt a little more empty without a certain somebody.

"Mom, I'm worried. It's been three days and he's still not better."

"Give him some time Jongup," Mrs. Moon reassured. "He's been through a lot in the past few days."

"But-" Jongup cut in.

"These things take time sweetie. We need to be patient and support him when he needs us."

Jongup sighed and glanced down the hallway to a certain door. "I know," he whispered. "but I'm just worried. I don't want him to hurt anymore."

Ever since the run in with Himchan Youngjae hadn't been the same. Jongup thought once Himchan knew at least part of the truth he would give up and be fine. He should have known Himchan would come knocking at his door demanding to see Youngjae. And how could Jongup blame him? He would have done the same had he been in Himchan's shoes. Now though Jongup was starting to regret his actions. When he saw Himchan's number calling him on his phone he almost couldn't believe  it. They had lost touch three years ago or rather Jongup had cut all connections with him three years ago. After that dreadful day it was decided it was for the best that Himchan wasn't told of Youngjae's recovery. They moved to a new apartment and he even dyed his hair to light brown. Still, Jongup couldn't find it in his heart to erase Himchan's number from his phone. Himchan was his friend, almost like the older brother Jongup wished he had, and they shared more memories than he could count. He told himself it was just for nostalgic purposes. For the memories. He wasn't going to contact him. He couldn't contact him. Had he known that they would end up meeting he would have never let Himchan into the apartment let alone give him the information he demanded. He should have rejected that call. He should have never picked up.

But he couldn't help it.

Maybe, somewhere deep in Jongup's heart, he hoped for a time where they could all be together again. The three of them- just like old times. But perhaps he was filled with false hopes. After Yongguk took Himchan to the hospital Youngjae stood and bolted to his room. He was still shaking from before and there were tears in his eyes. Jongup wanted to go after him, but his mom held him back. With a silent shake of her head she quietly told him to let Youngjae have time for himself to clear his head. Then maybe later, when he was calmer, would they try to put the incident behind them. But three days had come and gone and Youngjae showed no signs of recovering. He had locked himself in his room and refused to come out for anything, even school. The only times Jongup caught a glimpse of him was when he came out to use the rest room. And every time Jongup could see his eyes were rimmed red and his skin was as pale as ever. When he tried approaching Youngjae the boy quickly avoided his advances and locked himself in his room once again. Jongup and his mom left plates of food and water outside his door and they were gone every time Jongup came to pick them up. So he knew Youngjae was eating. But the fact that he couldn't do anything to help with Youngjae's suffering drove him crazy. He knew Youngjae was hurting, trying desperatly to get over that nagging feeling in his heart telling him Himchan was more than just a stranger. He wanted to help, but what could he do?

Jongup never felt so helpless in his life.

Mrs. Moon smiled gently. She bent down and placed a light kiss on the top of his head. "I know sweetie. I know."

"I can't help but think this was all my fault," Jongup cried. "Maybe if I had never picked up that call then Himchan hyung would have never come and Youngjae would still be fine and-"

"Jongup," Mrs. Moon lightly chided. "don't ever think that this was your fault. You couldn't have known what was going to happen. Granted you should have told me Himchan was coming, but what happened after was out of your control."

Jongup sniffed and rubbed his eyes.

"I think you did the right thing." Mrs. Moon added.

Jongup looked up at his mom with surprised filled eyes. "Really?"

Mrs. Moon nodded. "Yeah, really. Himchan has the right to know and this was bound to happen sooner or later. I would have preferred sooner, but better late than never right?" Mrs. Moon reached over to ruffle her son's hair.

"Yeah." Jongup said softly.

At that Mrs. Moon smiled a tiny smile. "Don't blame yourself Jongup. Everything will work out for the better. If I knew those two well enough they'll find a way to come together again. They'll be okay. You'll be okay."

Jongup wasn't sure if his mom was trying to reassure him or herself, but he was thankful for the statement regardless. He hoped everything would be okay too.

"Thanks mom." Jongup mirrored his mother's smile and leaned over to give her a hug. Jongup pulled away first and stepped towards the hallway leading to the bedrooms.

"I think I'll go check how Youngjae's doing. It's been a while."

"Alright sweetie." Mrs. Moon smiled.

Jongup made his way down the hallway and stopped at the door to Youngjae's room. He saw the empty plates and glass outside the door and made a mental note to take it back later. Jongup knocked out of habit then tried wriggling the knob to Youngjae's door. What he didn't expect was for the knob to actually turn and the door to actually open. Thinking Youngjae was finally starting to open up again Jongup stepped in with a smile on his face only for it to be immediately wiped off when he saw the room was empty. Feeling his breathing speed up Jongup hastily looked around in case Youngjae had decided to play a cruel joke on him. He found all his things were still there and a quick check to the bathroom revealed that Youngjae wasn't there either. Now Jongup really was starting to panic because where could Youngjae have gone?

He rushed out of the room and back down the hallway almost tripping himself along the way. Jongup found his mother in the kitchen preparing herself a cup of tea when he rushed in. She immediaely stopped what she was doing when she saw the expression on her son's expression and the panic stricken look in his eyes. He looked at her and told her what happened.

"Youngjae is gone."

The bus creaked to a stop and as the doors opened people filed out left and right, hurried steps making their way to their destination. Daehyun was the last person to step off. Unlike the others he was in no hurry to make it to his desired place. After quietely thanking the bus driver Daehyun moved away from the door and breathed in the early afternoon air. The clouds hid away part of the sun allowing only for the occasional ray of light to float down to earth. Regardless of the fact the day was warm and dry. The light wind provided a welcoming breeze to those staying outside. Daehyun walked a few feet away from the bus stop and spotted a familiar looking grocery store. He smiled at the sight and wondered if the kindly old lady that helped him was still there. He wouldn't be needing her help today though because by now he knew the route by heart and could probably find the place with his eyes closed.

Soon enough the tell tale signs of the park Daehyun grew to acquainted came into view. Daehyun let out a small sigh as he took everything in. Even after staying away for so long coming back never failed to give Daehyun a sense of ease and comfort he could never find anywhere else. Three days might have been little time for another person, but to Daehyun they might as well have been an eternity. A gust of wind suddenly blew by and rustled the remaining leaves the trees. Some of the trees were beginning to look a bit bare as leaves grew brighter and fell to the ground, but a majority of them still had their mirage of fall colors as they moved and danced with the wind. As the wind calmed down so did the swirl of leaves that went with it. Daehyun followed a couple with his eyes as they flew right past the one place he would spend hours at. As Daehyun walked towards the bench he couldn't help but feel a twinge of disappointment when he saw there was nobody else on it. His shoulders drooped ever so slightly as he approached. Nothing had changed as Daehyun sagged down onto the wooden seat. The park was the same as ever. Yet, as Daehyun let his eyes wander, why didn't it feel that way. He had thought about what Himchan said over the past few days and every time he ended up with a massive headache and a stressed out mind. Thinking about Himchan made him tired and Daehyun hated that he was feeling that way. The last thing he should be doing is sitting on a bench while his best friend is in the hospital.

But what could he do?

What could Daehyun do when Himchan was so convinced he was hiding something from him. It was like they were strangers again and the thought made Daehyun sick to his stomach. He had tried calling Yongguk to see if he knew anything. Daehyun had a gut instinct Yongguk knew exactly what was going on, but he wasn't answering his calls or texts. Daehyun was tempted to try the shop, but he had a feeling Yongguk wouldn't be there either. Daehyun heaved a sigh and rubbed at his tired eyes. He hadn't been getting much sleep for the past few days and it was beginning to show. Dark circles rimmed the underside of his eyes and his skin looked paler than normal. Even the teachers and students at school had started to notice his strange behavior. Daehyun just came to class then left, nothing more nothing less. He had wandered around the previous days after class hoping the fresh air and change of scenery would help him think. But it did little to nothing in regards of helping him piece anything together. In the end, Daehyun ended up back where he started. Daehyun leaned back and closed his eyes. He placed an arm over his head and took deep breaths. He was tired and the warm air and sun weren't helping him stay awake any better. Daehyun was just starting to drift off when the soft crunch of fallen leaves jolted him awake.

His eyes flew open and he looked up to try and find the source of the sound. He ended up meeting gazes with a very familiar autumn haired boy. Daehyun couldn't help the brief second his mouth dropped open in shock. Youngjae, for lack of better words, looked terrible. If Daehyun thought his dark circles looked bad than Youngjae had ones that looked two times worse. His eyes were rimmed red as if he had been constantly rubbing at them and he looked sickly pale. Daehyun was worried he would fall over at any second.

"Youngjae," Daehyun said. "what are you doing here?"

Youngjae looked flustered, as if he didn't expect anybody to be there at the moment, his eyes widned. His hands fluttered nervously in and out of his pockets and he kept his gaze averted. Daehyun looked at him and sighed. His initial reaction was shock followed by a good amount of worry. But past that came the feeling of complete warmth and joy that came from being with Youngjae. It was usually the common reaction by now. However, today the feeling of joy was quickly over taken by a strong feeling of confusion. While Daehyun's heart beat yes, his mind was telling him no. Himchan's words popped up in his mind and Daehyun couldn't help the grimace that flashed across his face. Youngjae must have caught it because he seemed to fidget even more after that, shifting his weight from foot to foot atop the leafy ground. Fighting off the feeling of confusion that flooded his mind Daehyun dug around in his pocket for his phone and pulled it out.

Do you want to sit down? He typed. He was too tired to speak today.

Youngjae hesitantly sat down and placed his hands in his lap. He twideled his thumbs together, much like how Daehyun would normally do when he would be feeling nervous. The action caused a smal smile to flit across Daehyun's lips. He looked at Youngjae again and realized how the shirt Youngjae was wearing seemed to sag just a little too much off his shoulder. Daehyun fought the urge to pull it up and instead wondered if Youngjae had lost some weight as well. What happened to him in the last couple days? It looked like Himchan wasn't the only one that was suffering.

What are you doing here?

Daehyun scooted over and lightly poked Youngjae on the shoulder. Youngjae jumped slighly when he did. Daehyun out held his phone for him to read and take. Youngjae glanced at his phone then lightly took it from his hands.

Shouldn't I be asking you that?

Daehyun gave a small smile.

You look terrible.

Youngjae read the message then looked over to Daehyun as if to clarify that was what he really meant. Daehyun smiled a small half smile in response. It was the best he could manage at a light hearted joke. Thankfully Youngjae seemed to understand as he typed back a response.

So do you.

At that Daehyun had to let out a small chuckle. If any, he was glad to see Youngjae still had his sense of humor.

Well at least I don't have eye bags that could rival a panda's.

Says the boy with drool running down his chin.

Daehyun's hand flew up to his mouth to check for any signs of drool only to find none. He gave Youngjae a playful glare in response.

It was so easy to get back to their usual playful banter. So easy to fall back into that little place of comfort. Whenever they were here it always seemed like they were in their own little world. For an hour or two the rest of the world didn't exhist. The only thing that did was the boy sitting next to him. But somehow Daehyun knew it wasn't going to be that easy.

Somehow, in some way, everything had changed.

Daehyun was just about to type back a response asking seriously what had happened to Youngjae when his phone suddenly vibrated with a new message. It was from Yongguk and Daehyun frowned. He had tried contacting Yongguk for the past three days and only now did he get back. Daehyun clicked open the message and quickly skimmed the contents. He was eager to call Yongguk back to demand what he knew about what was going on with Himchan. Only what he read stopped Daehyun head in his tracks. His grip loosened and the phone slipped free from his hands. Daehyun felt his eyes widen and his heart beat faster. He didn't realize he was on the verge of hyperventilating until he felt a light touch on his shoulder. Daehyun whipped around only to meet eyes with a concerned Youngjae. He opened his mouth to say something- anything- only to have no words come out. He couldn't. There was nothing he could say.

The phone dropped to the ground with a thud with the message still reflected on the sceen.

A simple three worded sentence.

"Himchan is missing."

A/N: This is what 3-4 hours of writing will get you lol. An update! Yay! A lot of things happening right now. So many unanswered questions. Let's hope things will clear up soon. What do you think will happen?
Lots of love. <3
~ Yumi