HITORI JANAI
Author: Me a.k.a Jaehan Kim Yunjae -- @yunjaehan
Pairing: Yunjae
Length: Oneshot (3949 words)
Rating: PG 13
Genre: Romance / Fluff
Cast:

Kim Jaejoong
Jung Yunho
Kim Jaehan (OC)
DISCLAIMER:

I don’t own Yunjae. They own each other but I hope I can own them. Okay, the plot, story and poster are mine.
WARNING!
This is fanfic means boy x boy story, so if you can not take it just leaves already. I do not Want to hear bad comments and I do not care with your comments.
A / N:
This Fanfiction was inspired by Jaejoong song’s named 'Footstep' and all using Jaejoong point of view

Happy Reading ^^
- Falshback -
"What is it? Why did you bring me here" she asked, the woman who has been 2 years fill the space of my heart. Today I have decided, I will propose to her and make her as my wife. All thanks to Yunho, he has assured me
"Jaehan-ah"
"Sorry, we better break up!" all of a sudden she cutting me off
"Huh? Wh- What do you mean?"
"I- I have found someone else who better than you Jaejoong, so"
"But..."
"I'm sorry, bye" she left me and run away
"Wait- hey! Jaehan wait, what do you mean?!" seems useless to me ran after her that time
- End of Flashback -

I still can’t forget it, exactly what is wrong with me? Everybody's always going to leave me. I always did what she asked for and give her what she wanted, but now she goes with another man. Why does my life always like this?

"Is it better to be alone?" I felt the tears flowing down my cheeks, even though that happen long time ago but still it haunts me. I felt a warm hug which never left me, the only person who always comes to my side
"Yunho..." I called him
"You crying again, Jae?" he asked while hugged me from behind, he used do to me. Yunho is very caring to me and know all my wishes. My best friend, Jung Yunho
"I’m sorry, even though that happen was a long time ago but I still can’t forget it. I am a cry baby huh?" I said make a joke to myself, while the man tightened his arms around me

Since that time, Yunho took me moved to Japan to get over my sadness and start a new life here, but I have wasted Yunho effort not to forget that. I felt guilty to Yunho, he's so good to me but I never give anything

"Nope, everyone would be doing the same thing if they are in your position. She was the first woman that attract your attention but she simply throw you without thinking about how you feel" he said to comfort me
"But still I wasn’t supposed to be like this, I am a man Yun. I should be more rigid and stronger" I hate myself become like this
"But I like you like that, Jae"
"Yun, I never seem able to hide my fragile side to you"
"Show whatever you are to me, Jae, I want to see the real you"  Yunho never relinquished his arms around me
"Yun, I awe you"
"Hmmm?" He asked confused
"You're the only one who still survive by my side"
"Eumm... Why must I leave you, Jae?"
"I don’t know. But everyone is going to leave me including my parents, only you aren’t, maybe it's been my destiny"
"Jae..."
"I know you for 9 years, Yun, and you're still able to survive with my childish attitude and selfishness, you're so great, Yun" I said trying hard to bear my tears
"You're not tired with me Yu-"
"Jae... Listen to me" Yunho turned me around to face him
"I will never leave you and will never be tired of you, whatever you are a spoiled or selfish I don’t care. Show all of yourself to me and I will always accept anything about you"
"Yun-ah" I started crying in his warm embrace
"Jae... The death of your parents is not your fault; they go because God has called them. I also don’t have parents now, but I have you Jae. We will be strong when we are together, haven’t I often told you"
"Yunho I'm afraid, I am afraid Yun. I'm afraid that one day you too will leave me just like them all"
"I will never leave you, you're not alone you have me, remember that"
"Yunho... Thank you. Thank you so much" is the only word I can say to reply to every things Yunho gave me
"Now you just take a rest, but you have to eat first, your body is very skinny like I'm hugging a piece of wood rather than the human body"
"Stupid" I said and smiled
"You know Jae, I like everything about you, but I like your smiling face the most"
"Thanks"
"Let’s eat, I've try to cook for you" Yunho pulled my hand
"You cook?"
"Of course"
"I'm not sure" I said mockingly
"Well though not as good as yours but I've tried"
"Well I'll eat a lot to appreciate yours" I said and we walked to the dining table with him
"That’s my beautiful, Jaejoong"
"Yunho. Are 9 years still less for you to realize if I am a man?"
"Nope, but to me even though you are a man, you still beautiful"
"You should be proud because you are the only one I allowed to say that I'm beautiful"
"Really? Oh... I'm feeling thrilled" he said as he looked at me then smile mockingly
"You really the stupid one" I said and extended out my tongue to him
"This delicious Yun, you're a good cook" I'm amazed at Yunho effort to please me
"Really, then eat much"
"Yes" I continued to eat the dishes his made in front of  me until the food runs out then stared at him slowly
"Yun, the food on your plate still full, you not eating?"
"I'm already full, Jae"
"But you're not eating at all"
"I'd rather see you eat, Jae"
"Aish- Mmmmm... Yun "
"Mmmm..."
"May I" I pointed to the food in front of him
"You want my food" Yunho said after know what I mean
"Umm..." I said while nodding
"Take it" Yunho gave his food to me
"Thanks" I smiled and took the food
"You should smile more often, Jae"
"Mmm... Why?"
"Because your smiling face is very lovely"
"Ok... Ok… For your sake, I will smile more often now"
 "My Jaejoong indeed a cute man" he said
"My Yunho also a good man" I replied
"Change your clothes after eating and resting, okay?"
"Okay" I continue to eat this delicious food until exhausted
"Ah- I'm very full" I said, patting my stomach
"Rest, let me a wash the plate"
"Umm..." I walked into our room. Yes, I slept with Yunho in one room. Every night I'm always had a nightmare and ends with crying, but then Yunho always come to my side and comfort me
"Dressed it with a more comfortable one" I said and took favorite Lily pajamas then lay my body in bed. It feels very comfortable
"Jae you were asleep?" Yunho opened the bedroom door before me
"I just want to close my eyes, Yun" Yunho walked toward me
"Sleep tight,  I’ll go shower"
"Umm..."
"Good night, Jae-ah" he said and kissed my forehead gently
"Night" I said and fell asleep
%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%
"Morning" Yunho's voice startled me
"Ah- Morning,Yun" I said while turn around and see him still in a mess after wake up
"Wash yourself first, Yun. You are messy, breakfast is ready soon" I said try to get up but I felt his muscular hands around my waist from behind, ordinary things he did to me
"Mmmm... Here is more comfortable" he said and put his chin on my shoulder
"No, you have to take a bath"
"How are you?"
"Don’t change the topic"
"I don’t change the topic, I just ask how are you?"
"'I’m okay, Yun. Thank you"
"Your welcome"
"Now goes shower" I said and let go of his arms
"Yes... Yes... You are very fussy"
"Yah!" I want to hit him but he had run away
"Yunho stupid" I muttered while smiling then go to the kitchen
"Sushi and Takoyaki for breakfast no problem, right?" I asked to no one in particular
"No problem, Jae" I heard his voice again
"Finish your bath already?!"
"Yes"
"That fast?"
"I was always fast when bathing"
"I don’t believe you" I squinted my eyes sharply
"Yes, I am" Yunho says tousled my hair and smile
"Meals are ready? I'm hungry"
"Yes, let's eat" I bring the food the dining table
"Jae, what if today we go out"
"Where are we going?"
"We've long not going around, Umm... How about Tokyo Tower?"
"I'm bored always going of there" I still eat the food before me
"But you've never been to the top right?"
"Hell yeah, but I'm lazy to get out today, Yun"
"No, you must come with me"
"But-"
"You should get out more to walk around Jae, so mind more fresh" he begged me
"Okay" I said resignedly
"Now finish your breakfast and we will leave"
"It's still early, Yun"
"Precisely because it’s still early"
"Why?"
"Because it’s still quiet, so we could go top with ease"
"Okay. I’ll be ready in a minute"

 
After finishing our breakfast, I immediately ran to our room and opened the closet to find clothes that fit me, because it was spring so no need to wear clothes that are too thick. I took a loose white shirt and jeans with matching color.I really liked white color, is perfect with my skin, although eventually even look pale

"I'm ready" I said while walked to the kitchen and Yunho still there wash the plates
"Ready? Let's go" Yunho said and cleans his hands with a napkin

We walked to the car and Yunho opened the door for me, well sometimes indeed he often treats me like a girl. Immediately after Yunho entered our car we headed to Tokyo Tower.  The way was not too far from our home. Arrived there, soon I pulled Yunho's hand to get straight to the top of Tokyo Tower. Not take too long time we've already at the top. The view from up here is very beautiful especially in this spring, Sakura flowers are blooming beautifully, the entire city covered with pink color that’s very interesting

"Yun... Look! Sakura blossom" I said and point to the whole city down there
"Hmm .." he smiled
"You like it?" He added
"Of course I like it" I answered without seeing his face
"Good"
"Eh... Why?" I asked, confused
"Because finally I saw you smiling like that again"
"Yunho-ah thanks, thank you so much" I felt my tears seem can’t to flow back
"I bring you here is not to make you cry" he said and hugged me
"Sorry" only that word I can say

I lay my face in his chest while still holding back my tears. Yunho is very gentle to me, too gentle even. I always felt protected when in his embrace like thi; it feels very cozy and warm

"Yunho thanks, I don’t know how to repay you" I muttered quietly still in his embrace, we continue to embrace each other while staring at Sakura flowers falling in the wind

"Ano..." a voice made me wake up and slowly release Yunho’s hug
"Jaehan!" I said shocked
"It's really you, Jaejoong" he said with a cheerful tone
"How are you? I didn’t think we will meet here" she added
"I- I- yes" I said stiffly and I felt Yunho's hand holding me. I looked at his face then he smiled at me. I smiled back
"What are you doing here?" she asked again
"Going around" I aswered
"With Yunho, you guys was still together" I raised both my eyebrows just hear her words, why did she say like that
"What do you mean?" Yunho asked before I could ask
"Did not intend anything" she replied with a forced laugh
"Then we excuse" I said after feeling uncomfortable with this meeting and walked away still intertwined my finger with Yunho's
"Jaejoong wait" the woman yelled and ran towards me
"What is it?" I turned to look at her
"Can we talk for a minute?"
"About?"
"It... " she lowered her face
"Jae.." Yunho squeezed our hands and looked at me
"I wait in the car?" He said while smiling to me
"But Yun-" Yunho cutting me by putting his finger on my lips and go away. I saw him go until his body disappeared in the elevator
"Jaejoong..." I turned to face the woman before me
"What is it?" I asked quietly
"I actually was looking for you recently"
"Eh...?" I said shocked
"Jaejoong, I- I want to apologize to you"
"For what?"
"About that time, I walked away without waiting for your words" I just shut up and hear her words
"Jaejoong... I-" she hesitated
"Can you come back to me?"
"Do you mean?" I said confused
"Like it used to be, I am yours and you were mine..."
"But didn’t you already seeing other man?"
"I was wrong Jaejoong, he only took advantage of me, you are the best for me, you are the one that understand me and love me" I was just stunned to hear her words
"Jaejoong I beg you" she added, and hold my hands
"Jaehan... Sorry but I feel like this is better"
"Better?" she asked and looked at me
"Yes, after you had left me, I discovered what really makes me happy and it not with you"
"You- you mean?"
"Yes. I know what happiness I want now and I will have take it, so I can’t get back with you"
"Who is she?"
"There are no woman here, there is only Yunho"
"I see. I was already expecting that" she said and looked down
"I’m sorry" I replied and go away, go to Yunho

What I said before, everything from my heart. Yes, although I just noticed it now but I'm confident with what I feel. So far only Yunho who always come to my side and do anything for me, he could be my strength; consolation even he could have done something stupid just to please me

Yunho taught me the true meaning of love, love is where we understand the feelings, needs and weaknesses of those whowe love and Yunho have all of that. Yunho was the one who understands me and knows my weaknesses, I can never cover up my feelings when I with him and I know this is the love that I need

Actually the way home not too far away, but it feels very long time, no one spoke at all, the atmosphere is very quiet and Yunho focus only see the street in front of him. I don’t know how to start a conversation. Why he was keep silent so sudden?

"Yun..." I said to start the talk
"Hmmm..." he replied without looking to me
"Why are you?"
"Nothing"
"Then why you keep silent"
"I'm only just concentration to the way, Jae"
"Eumm... Okay" I said softly with a little disappointed

After arriving at home, Yunho directly out of the car without saw me and passed me go inside the house, usually he would open the door for me. Why Yunho like this, but when we saw Sakura flower together he was still fine

"Ah- what it is because Jaehan?" I asked myself

I ran into the house immediately looking for Yunho. I'm looking into every corner of the room, from the living room, kitchen and dining room, but Yunho was not there. I immediately ran to our room on the second floor and sure enough Yunho there. I walked toward him who sits in the side of our bed, covering his face with his both arms

"Yun..." I said touching heis shoulder and sat down beside him
"Jae..." he replied and looked at me with sad face
"Wh-"
"I'm sorry Jae, I don’t know why but I-" he said quickly but I put my fingers on his lips to make him stop
"You didn’t do anything wrong, Yun"
"But Jae-" I just smiled and lie him on my chest. I Yunho's hair gently to calm him down
"Yun..." I called after I think Yunho started a little calmed
"You know Yun. I made a song" I continued
"Mmmm..." Yunho lifted himself and stared at me with strange eyes
"Umm..." I said and nodded
"You want to see?" I asked and gave my small notebook that I always put in my trouser pocket. Yunho took the book and read it

About the time when the sun set my footsteps took me

Opening my eyes to a place I thought I had forgotten

Whether I still have some hatred towards you

I want to be free now

I believe time would solve everything

Was that in itself a foolish belief?

Now, I want to just go with the flow of things

It doesn’t matter to you anymore

After reading the contents in that small notebook, Yunho lifted his head and looked at me again

"What do you think?" I asked him
"This..."
"Yes, but it's not finished yet" I said and took back my notebook from his hand

Actually I didn’t want to continue this song anymore, but I got the idea now. Let me write" I add and take the pen on the table beside our bed then I continued to write the lyrics of the song. I felt Yunho just staring at me

"This" I handed the book back to Yunho
From the start a person like you never existed to me
The way I didn’t to you
Remember one day you'll hurt as much as I did
From someone other myself than
You'll experience the same pain

I'm sorry this is all I can do
It's the only way, it cans be really
For that day to come when I can start over like you
For me who can’t love you and can’t help but hate you
"Jae..." he called
"Hmmm..."
"This..."
"Yun...  Jaehan asked me to go back with her" I started to tell

"…….." Yunho just keep silent
"And I reject her" I continued
"You hate her"
"I really wanted to hate her, but it is very difficult, but... that doesn’t mean I still love her, it's just hating other people turned out to be so much hard"
"You're too kind, Jae" he commented
"At least she felt the pain I felt at that time" I replied
"Not very good, but good" he continued and I just smiled can’t help laughing to hear his words
"And, after all these past years I realized one thing..." I took a deep breath
"I love you" I said firmly
"Huh??" Yunho looked at me with shocked faces
"What you say earlier, Jae?"
"Yunho-ah, I love you"
"You're not playing with me, right Jae?" He asked I shook my head while smiling at him
"I love you too, I love you so much" he added then hugged me
"Mhmm..." I muttered to feel the warmth of his body
"But Jae why all of a sudden?" he said let go of our embrace and smiled at me
"Not so sudden, Yun, but I did just realize"
"Realize about what?"
"Youalways come to my side and take care of me. When I was sad, you can make me laugh and cheer me as well. When I'm happy, you can make me happier so many times. When you go away alone from Tokyo Tower before and leave me, I realized that I couldn’t if I am without Yun. I am weak and helpless, my strength and courage, you hold their entirety and now my heart, everything are yours. I- I love you, Yun" the tears began to drip again, I don’t know. I've always been weak when with him
"Jae-ah, you don’t know how much happiness you gave to me now"
"I love you" is the only word I can say now
"I love you"

Yunho continued to hug me with his muscular hands, the warmth that I will never let go and give it to anyone else. Just me, Yunho’s love just mine alone

"Jae..." Yunho let go of our embrace and looked at me gently
"Hmmm..." I stared back at his strong eyes

His face was close to my face, he lay closer and closer until I felt his lips gently touched my lips. My first kiss with him after 9 years I know him, it is the most wonderful feeling I ever felt when I am with Yunho. Feelings of love and be loved

His kiss deepened on me, he forced me to open my mouth slowly and insert his tongue into my mouth. Yunho push my body slowly to fall on the bed with him on top me. I never dreamed about this but this seemed far more than I imagined

"Yun-ah..." I tried to breathe when I felt there was no air space in my chest

As understood what I mean, Yunho immediately release his kiss on me and moved towards my neck. Yunho kept kissing my neck toward my adam apple and it gently. I can’t stand this much happy feeling, I like being above the clouds

While Yunho like not thinking about anything, he just kept kissing my neck in each corner creep up to my shoulder. I felt his warm hands began to lead into my shirt and tried to remove the buttons one by one until my body clearly visible in front of him. His kiss started down toward my chest, I think this time is no longer white skin in my neck because Yunho gave a red mark there

"Yun... I-" my words cut because of the pleasure that I feel

As realized, he immediately stop his kisses and look at me with worried face

 
"Jae-ah... I’m sorry, I- I" Yunho looked down
"Yun..." I brought his face with both hands and slowly lifted it gently while look at him gently
"Don’t worry, Yun"
"But I force you, Jae"
"You don’t force me Yun, I also want to do it. I want to give myself completely to you, but Yun, can if we do it when I feel ready?" I asked, hesitant
"Of course Jae, I don’t want to force you" he said and hugged me again

Yunho attitude never changed, even he more care to me and protect me. I always feel the love and affection in every touch he gave to me and words he said to me. I never once missed a day without feeling happy because Yunh,. even though he had to wait up for 3 months for the readiness of my heart and soul. The sincerity of love he given to me makes me can’t deny Yunho and I gladly give all myself to him.

Flavor of love like this is the first and the last one for me, even though Yunho was not the first to me he was the first that is able to enter into my heart as deep as I could without removing him and lock him there forever. I will always keep this love till I must release it with my life.

'I love you' magic words that changed my life


-END-

Thanks
For those who've stopped by and read this fiction
sorry for my bad grammar^^