What Are Your Feelings?

Hearts Will Never Change

Lila couldn’t believe it. Boyfriend. That word kept replaying in her mind. The friend that she made upon her first week back in Korea was dating her ex-boyfriend, but she pretended not to know him. It hurt her to say that she didn’t know who he was, but it just came out and she couldn’t stop it. Lila figured that she couldn’t just announce to Eunji that she and Sandeul used to date. That would make everything awkward and she figured she might have lost the first friend she made coming back and end up with no one again.

            “Hello,” Sandeul said awkwardly shaking her hand. He was confused as to why Lila would say that she didn’t know him. He knew and remembered perfectly well of their past, but he wondered if something happened to her in the past two years that would result in a memory loss. For the two years of not seeing her, he wondered where she went and wondered why she never attempted to contact him. Sandeul knew that it was him that broke up with her, but he thought that they would be able to maintain their friendship and keep in touch. Sandeul returned to the school after two weeks but Lila was nowhere to be found and no one was exactly sure where she went. That was when Sandeul never saw her again and he didn’t know where to find her.

            As Lila and Sandeul shook hands, Lila felt the same warmth that he always had in his hands. The same feeling was there and it took everything in her to keep shut about knowing him knowing that it would hurt someone else. Eunji looked happy and Lila couldn’t destroy that.

            “Well, this is the rest of the group,” Eunji said breaking the silence and Lila and Sandeul immediately stopped shaking hands. “Why don’t you guys introduce yourselves?”

            “You already know me,” Gongchan said with a smile.

            “You just met me,” Sandeul awkwardly said.

            “I’m Shinwoo, vocal and rapper.”

            “I’m Baro, rapper and squirrel.” Lila smiled at the squirrel statement, she thought it was different and wondered why he would call himself a squirrel.

            “I’m Jinyoung, leader and vocal,” the last guy in the line said as he looked at Lila. Lila found his stares as something different and wondered why he was looking at her in that fashion. In the end, he ended up giving Lila a gentle smile before she turned her attention back to Eunji.

            “Well, this is the whole group,” Eunji said to Lila. “Their name is based off of their blood types. Baro there is type B while everyone else is A.”

            “Oh,” Lila said nodding her head.

            “Now, we already know that Eunji is type B along with Baro,” Jinyoung said looking straight at Lila. “What are you?”

            “Me?” Lila asked pointing to herself.

            “Who else would I be talking to?” he joked.

            “Um…I think I remember someone saying that I was an A. I donated blood in high school and got this card that said what blood type I am,” Lila stated as she attempted to recall the moment back in America. “I think I’m positive I’m A.”

            “Yay!” Gongchan said jumping up and down. “Welcome to the club.”

            “We have to get going,” their manager said coming up to them. “We don’t want to keep the fans waiting.”

            “Are you going to stick around?” Sandeul asked Eunji as he put his arm around her waist. He found it slightly difficult to be a loving boyfriend to Eunji when Lila was standing right there, but figured that if she didn’t know him, then what was the point of worrying about it.

            “No, we’re going to go back home. Lila here is tired, but if you guys have time you can stop over later.”

            “Maybe,” Sandeul said shrugging his shoulders and quickly kissed Eunji on the cheek. “I’ll call you if we’re going to come over later.”

            “Okay,” Eunji said smiling.

            “It was nice meeting all of you,” Lila said as she politely bowed to them and they did the same.

            “Maybe we’ll see more of each other,” Gongchan said.

            “Maybe,” Lila said laughing at his adorableness. With that, the boys disappeared to go get ready for their fansigning and Lila and Eunji made their way out of the building and back to Eunji’s car. “I didn’t know that you just wanted to go there for that,” Lila said as she got into the passenger’s seat.

            “Well I haven’t seen him for a while and I missed him,” Eunji simply replied. “So when he told me that he was going to be going to this mall, I wanted to come, but I didn’t want to come alone so I dragged you along.”

            “Oh, thanks,” Lila said showing Eunji a smile, but in reality, she didn’t want to smile. She just saw Sandeul again after two years of separation and it was more difficult than she thought, but then again, Lila never thought that she would see him again. If life had worked in her favor, she would’ve never seen Sandeul again, but it didn’t and she had to meet up with him when it turned out that he was her best friend’s boyfriend.

            After arriving home, Lila immediately went to her own separate apartment after bidding goodbye to Eunji. She really was tired and her head was pounding from the overanalyzing of the current situation. How in the world would she be able to face Eunji knowing that she was dating her ex-boyfriend? Then reality took a hold of Lila and she realized that friends probably dealt with that issue all of the time. One friend’s boyfriend could easily become an ex-boyfriend and the current boyfriend of another friend. Things like that happened all of the time in America, so why should things in Korea be any different?

            Lila took a painkiller and lay in her room as she stared at the ceiling. More than she would want to admit, she was kind of curious about how Eunji and Sandeul had first met. Was that the whole reason that he left her in the past? Did he meet Eunji and found out that he liked her more than Lila? Still, after those two years, Sandeul never attempted to contact her and Lila thought that he would have tried at least once, but nothing ever came. It wasn’t like she attempted to contact him either, maybe they just weren’t meant to be.

            Slowly, Lila felt drowsy and drifted off to sleep.

 

“Hyung, why didn’t you tell us that noona had a friend?” Gongchan asked as they were driving back to their dorm.

            “I-I didn’t know,” Sandeul admitted. His mind was still placed on the words that Lila had said. Did she really not remember him? Her words kept replaying in his mind throughout the whole fansigning, too. Sandeul felt a little regretful towards the fans, but it was just bothering him too much. The other members knew nothing about Sandeul’s past relationships that he had with girls so they had no idea that Lila was one of Sandeul’s ex-girlfriends, really, his only ex-girlfriend.

            “You know, Lila, she seemed kind of cute,” Jinyoung admitted looking at all of his dongsaengs. Immediately upon hearing that, Sandeul’s ears perked up and suddenly he felt anger boiling, but he did his best to control it since he was no longer dating Lila, he was dating Eunji and it would look suspicious if he started caring about another girl, but he never stopped caring about Lila.

            Whenever times were tough in the past, he always wondered what she would be doing and he would be wondering if she ate and if she was keeping her body healthy. His mind naturally started to worry about her and so many times in the past he wanted to call her, but every time he restrained himself knowing that something good might not come out of it if he had called her.

            “You think she’s cute?” Baro asked Jinyoung quickly hopping onto the question.

            “You don’t?” Jinyoung asked looking in disbelief at Baro.

            “I will admit that she doesn’t look that bad,” Baro said.

          “I don’t know,” Jinyoung said shrugging his shoulders. “Maybe I should see if this feeling takes me somewhere.”

            “Hyung, this is the first time that I ever heard you say that you liked someone,” Gongchan said in shock.

            “Hey, I’m a man too,” Jinyoung said defending himself.

            “Manager-hyung,” Gongchan said attempting to do aegyo to their manager that was driving the car. “Can we go to Eunji’s apartment? I’m sure no one will recognize us, please?”

            “Will you guys behave?” their manager sternly asked.

            “We promise,” Jinyoung said. “I’m the leader and I’ll make sure that they don’t do anything wrong.”

            “Well, since you guys have no schedule, there is really nothing that I can do to prevent you guys from going, so I guess I can drop you off. You deserve a nice break anyway.”

            The car quickly took a turn and made its way towards Lila and Eunji’s apartment as Sandeul took out his phone to tell his girlfriend that he was coming.

 

Lila awoke to a loud banging at her door. “Hmm?” she asked as she opened the door with half open eyes and scratching her head. “Eunji? What are you doing here?”

            “Sandeul-oppa just called me and said that he and the other guys are coming over here soon. We’re all going to hang out in my apartment, you’re welcome to come.”

            “No thanks,” Lila said. “I think I’ll pass. I have a headache.”

            “Are you sure?” Eunji asked with wide eyes. “Do you want me to tell them to come another time?”

            “No,” Lila said shaking her head. “You can hang out with them, just pretend like I’m not here and I haven’t moved in yet.”

            “But it’ll feel weird being with them without you.”

            “How would it be weird?” Lila asked seeing no reason in that. “You hung out with them before without me. What would make this time any different? And you said that they’re coming soon, so go hurry yourself up. I’ll be sleeping.”

            Lila closed the door and breathed a sigh of relief. She was slightly worried that Eunji would have forced her into coming over, but she didn’t. Luckily, even though the headache was already mostly gone, Lila was able to get out of seeing Sandeul again. She wasn’t sure if she would be able to see Sandeul two times in one day without being able to say something about how she knows him to Eunji.

            After Lila got changed into more comfortable clothes and made some ramen for herself, she heard the doorbell ring and someone knock. Being sure that it was probably Eunji begging her to play, Lila didn’t answer it and continued eating her ramen until the knocking continued. As it went on for quite some time, Lila figured that it couldn’t have been Eunji since Eunji would have just called Lila and said something about waiting at the door.

            Going over, Lila opened the door and was surprised to see Jinyoung standing there. “You’re…Jinyoung, right?” Lila hesitantly asked.

            “So you do remember me,” he said with a smile.

            “You have red hair,” Lila said pointing to his head. “Who wouldn’t remember you?”

            “I’ll give you that,” he said with a light laugh. “Can I come in? Eunji said something about you feeling unwell.”

            “But don’t you want to be over with Eunji and everyone else?”

            “I’m with them all of the time.”

            “I guess if you want to get sick you can come inside,” Eunji said as she opened the door wider.

            “Okay then,” Jinyoung said laughing as he stepped inside. “I see that you’re one for just wearing clothes.”

            “Hmm?” Lila asked turning around and looking at him and then she realized what she was wearing, although it didn’t really bother her a lot that she was wearing just a pair of shorts and a gigantic t-shirt that went down to her thighs. “Oh, this outfit? It doesn’t matter.”

            “You are something different.”

            “Something different?” Lila asked as Jinyoung took a seat next to her.

            “Normally girls would be concerned with what they’re wearing,” Jinyoung began, “and after seeing that they’re not wearing something that is suitable for the opposite , they immediately run and change your clothes, but you…you don’t care do you.”

            “Why should I care?” Lila asked. “I mean, if the guy doesn’t like what I’m wearing now then why should I go out of my way to be uncomfortable if it only means pleasing him? That guy is no longer worth my time.” Lila looked over at Jinyoung and noticed him intently staring at her. “Um…are you hungry? I was about to eat some ramen. Here, I’ll make some for you.”

            “No,” Jinyoung said grabbing her wrist and sitting her down. “There’s no need for that, I can make it myself.”

            “Are you sure about that?” Lila hesitantly asked.

            “I’m sure I can make my own ramen. Just tell me where everything is.”

            Jinyoung spent about fifteen minutes making the ramen and finding everything he needed before returning to the living room with Lila.

            “So why did you come over here?” Lila asked. “You could be playing with the others but you decide to come over here and spend time with boring me.”

            “I don’t think you’re boring,” Jinyoung said as he took a big bite of his ramen.

            “You’ve only just met me today, how can you make such a decision?”

            “You don’t seem boring. I want to get to know you more.”

            “You want to get to know me more,” Lila said repeating Jinyoung’s words. She had an inkling as to where Jinyoung was going with it but wasn’t entirely sure if what she thought he was going to do was actually true.

            “You are a very interesting creature,” Jinyoung said giving Lila a smile. “And I have good feelings about you. I just want to see where these good feelings take me.”

            “So you’re toying with me?” Lila said, half joking and half serious.

            “I’m not toying with you, I promise,” Jinyoung gently said. “I have good feelings about you and we can start out as a friendship, but Lila, do you have good feelings about me?”

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What will Lila's answer to Jinyoung be? Will Lila ever be able to see Sandeul again? Will Eunji ever know the truth?

 

Here is Chapter 2. Hope you enjoyed :D

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Comments

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jinyounglove
#1
Chapter 2: Oh mo Jinyoung has a feelings towards Lila. By the way i really like the story
chocolategirl
#2
Chapter 31: I like Lila a lot better now, because she had the guts to actually talk to him. I wonder Jinyoung should had talked to Gongchan, I mean hello, Jinchan , not to change the plot or anything
sungkyunnie
#3
Ooooh I like this a lot
tiffani123456 #4
Chapter 28: Don't make eunji sound bad !!!!!!!
chocolategirl
#5
Chapter 30: YESSSS LILA HAS TO BE WITH JINYOUNG!!!!!!!!!!!!
tiffani123456 #6
Chapter 11: I want sandeul and Lila back together but jiyoung and eunji together too
xchessthebest
#7
Chapter 28: I kinda want Sandeul and Lila back together..
I mean Lila already kissed him on the cheek after asking Jinyoung for a break so0o..
Dnguyen
#8
Chapter 28: I hate having Sanduel and Lila together I like having Jinyoung with Lila
Jinla<3