~ Chapter 17 ~

It's like nothing in this world matters to me right now, all i can feel is how soft his lips were, how truly sweet his taste was and how it moves perfectly on mine. i never in my life thought of kissing someone especially Kim Myungsoo, never in my mind crossed the bittersweet possibily of kissing him not even being able to touch him, but right now this man infront of me sends fireworks all over my body, it's like an unexplainable feeling, how funny they say that you will never forget you first kiss ever. well, this proves it. 

"What are you doing to me? Nam Yuki" He whispered as he lean his forehead into  mine. all i could do was looked at his dark hazel eyes as they were focused into mine.

My fingers were still tangled into his hair, i never realized how soft his hair was, how smooth his hands and how his lips make wonders into mine. 

I gasp at my sudden thoughts. Why am i thinking about those things? 

"Well, we better get out of here before anyone sees us?" Myungsoo smiled and held into my hand.  I was still shocked and surprised, whatever you called it. I was not okay.  i was flustered.

When we entered inside we were both soaking wet, great. Now how can i go home looking like this? 

"I have spare clothes at my locker" L looked at me and i noticed that we were still holding hands, i meekly nodded and he flashed his cute smile at me, we silently make our way to the boy's locker room/

Once we were inside Myungsoo handed me a clean shirt, wait. his shirt? i will wear his shirt. I don't know why but i am smiling like an idiot. L might have noticed it because he chuckle.

'Uhmm... th-thanks" I said as i rushed to the nearest shower room and quickly changed.

Neither of us spoke about that kiss but i just can't forget about it, can i ? after all it was my First kiss...My very first kiss.

What if he was just playing with me ? what if that was an accident? Sure, he's well known to be a player at school, what if that was just a game.. his game? I silently stared at the mirror looking at the fragile girl before my eyes, did got played? a tear silenlty rolled down on my cheek and i began to tremble.

I closed the shower door behind me and keep my eyes focused on anything except for this man who makes me confused and well.. used.

"Hey, are you alright?" He said while taking a step closer to me. Of course Im not alright! Kissing me ledike that and making my feelings get mixed up, Im not alright you idiot, im not alright because i think i love you.

"Yes" I said, almost a whisper. I wonder if he can hear how fast my heart beats right now. Standing so close to him that i can almost smell him, his scent that lingers on my body.

"I s-should go" I tried to avoid looking at his intense stare on me. he didn't speak a word, maybe he was waiting for me to leave, yes i think he wants me to leave. 

Before i could take a step he suddenly grab my wrist, I feel sudden heat creeping into my body like wild fires engulfing me, weakening me, How come a single touch of him makes my legs go wobbly and for a second i forgot to breathe.

"About earlier.." he said, his voice holds no emotion that it suddenly hurts me to hear the words that are about to slip on his lips.

"Don't worry, i take it as an accident, Im sure you didn't mean that and-and" I was breathing heavily as i said those words, i know that he regrets it and it menat nothing to him, but why do i feel so betrayed and hurt. i tried to yank my wrist and bit my lips to control these tears that are threatening to fall.

"What?!" He said, surprised. He let go of my hand and looked at me with eyes that contains a lot of emotion that sends shiver into my body.

"You.. regret it?" he said, taking a step closer to me, he sounded as if i just said the most unexpected thing he heard in his whole life but why does he sounded hurt.

I nodded and looked at him. Maybe i shouldn't do it because when his hazel eyes met mine i can see that they are full of pain,anger, and..sadness.

I don't know what to do, how am i supposed to react? why..why is this complicated, it's just a freaking kiss. A kiss. 

'I-I don't know" im lying. I liked it and it was the most amazing thing that ever happened to me and i want to do it again. I don't regret it.

i kept my mouth shut but those words are threatening to spill it. to tell him that i didn't and will not regret it.

He chuckled and he lifted my my eyes making me meet his hazel one. 

"I don't think you ing regret it" With those words his lips captured mine once more and i melted into this gushing emotions that sends fireworks into my body and makes me want to melt into his arms. 

The playboy stole my very first kiss.