Have you ever thought of starting over with your former lover?

But then realized that it was already too late to patch things up?

Yet here I am, trying to fit myself in those spaces of his life thinking we could be back to the way we were before.

“Baekhyun-ah!”

“Minyeon don’t follow me!”

“Baekhyun! I’m sorry!” I apologized because of the plan.

I didn’t mean to make him mad. I just want him to realize that the girl he’s currently dating is a . Even if he told me not to follow, I still did because I know how hurt he was. Yet, it feels awkward for us to be comforting each other now.

How did we broke up?

Errr… it was my fault. Yep. Just for a stupid reason I had let go of the first guy that I truly love.

_______________

“I’m sorry Baekhyun…”

“Why are you apologizing?”

“…because…”

He held both of my hands and sandwich it between his.

“Baekhyun ah…” I slid my hand off from his and placed them to my pocket.

“I’m…” I gulped before I could finish my sentence. “Breaking up with you.”

His eyes widened. “What!? Why?”

“I’m going to China for 2 years for an exchange program.”

“so what!? We can still see each other after 2 years!” he was already yelling at me and he realized it a bit later. He bobbed his head down and breathed in deeply. “I’m sorry for yelling. But can’t we have a long distance relationship?”

“I don’t know if I can keep up with that…” I looked away from his face and stare at my feet all the time.

“At least let’s try…” he pleaded as he took my hands again from my pocket and squeeze them to his. I nodded half-heartedly.

Do I really want this? Breaking up or staying connected?

____________

It was the day that I’m leaving for China. My family and Baekhyun was there to see me leave.

“remember to call once or twice a day or just a simple sms will do since calls are expensive,” my mom reminded me.

“and be careful while walking there at night alone. China isn’t as safe as you think. Remember the taekwondo move you learned okay?” my dad patted my head and I gave him a warm smile.

“Yes dad.” I gave them both a warm long hug before I walk to Baekhyun to bid him farewell.

“Min-ah…” nickname that he created. “just be safe for me…” I hugged him, he pulled away and kissed my forehead and whisper,

“I love you….please don’t forget.”

____________

When I reached China, my  priorities were changed as for the subjects that I have weren’t as easy as I thought it would be.

1^st is to study

2^nd is to study

3^rd is my family

And the rest is history

I was not alone since there were some other Korean students there for the program. and I’m paired in a room with one. Song Chaerin. She is really nice and petite and has a really strong personality. I think I could get close to her with just one night of girl talk.

“Oh, you also have a boyfriend back in Korea!? Me too!” she seems enthusiastic as I told her about me and Baekhyun. “My boyfriend is really cute! He always makes this ‘O_O’ face.” She said as she widened her eyes with her fingers. I envy her for the part that she really love her boyfriend and doesn’t seem to have a problem with long distance relationships.

______________

“Hey! Minyeon, your phone.” Chaerin commented as she saw my phone blinking. I was about to press the receivers button but the call stopped. I checked the log and saw Baekhyun’s name. It wasn’t the first time that I’ve missed his call. It was like the 5^th time already. It wasn’t in my intention to ignore his calls it’s just that I’m too busy. And as time goes by, we just passed each other without even knowing.

2 years had passed in a glance and I’m back in Korea. Chaerin still have a year before she could come back but she had made friends and had a new roommate who is also from Korea.

I walked across the terminal and there saw my parents but no Baekhyun in sight.

Of course he won’t be here. He doesn’t even know because you didn’t tell him. My thought scolded me.

I opened my phone and look at the message archive. The last message that I’ve received from him was… 5 months ago!? Oh goodness…

[Minyeon-ah…
 I don’t think I can go on with no call or messages or greetings.
 I guess I should have agreed to what you have suggested before you left…
 I’m sorry for pushing my feelings on you. ..]

I hadn’t realized that we’ve broken up until I’ve read this message again. I felt a sharp pain in my chest. It’s my fault that he left me. I shoudn’t be sad since it used to be my decision before.

As my parents approached me I took them in my arms tightly and cried. I’m so selfish that I cried to them because my heart aches for Baekhyun and not for the times that I missed them.

“Hey, Minyeon-ah, are you okay?” my mom asked but I can’t tell them my selfish reason I just mumbled, “I miss you.” Then my dad brushed my hair and his warm hands made me remember Baekhyun’s kiss on my forehead.

____________

A week had already passed since I arrived in Seoul.

I miss Baekhyun…

No. I musn’t. he might already have a girlfriend. But I want to greet him…

I took my phone from the end table and started to compose a message.

[Hi! It’s been a long time!
I’m already in the country.
do you want to meet up for a drink?-Minyeon]

I was examining my message over and over. Being careful of my spellings and grammars. I don’t want to be embarrassed. I waited for half an hour ‘til he replied to my message.

[Sure! I also want you to meet Sungyu.]

“Sun…gyu?” I just send him an “Okay”

“Sungyu…is that his new girlfriend?” I dug my face to my pillow and screamed,

“AHHHHH!”

___________

Yep. I’m right. That’s his new girlfriend.

“Minyeon! How have you been?” Baekhyun arrived and hugged me, I was a bit surprised but then someone behind him coughed. It was a petite girl that looks like a model.

“Oh, Minyeon, This is Sungyu.”

I offered my hand amd gently she took it. “…my girlfriend.” I almost choked from air at what he had revealed.

“sorry! I think I had too much coffee.”

Nah, it’s okay.” Baekhyun waved it off.

“Sit. Sit.” I offered the chairs that was in front of me.

“So… how did you guys met?”

“Hmm…” Baekhyun thinks.

“At the ice cream shop oppa~” Sungyu reminded Baekhyun.

Oppa!? My eyes widened as I almost choke at the latte that I was drinking.

She calls him oppa!? I don’t even have the guts to call him that since I’m a few months older. But still-!!!

“Right. I met her at the ice cream shop.”

I didn’t want to pry more about their relationship so I tried to change the topic.

“Hey baekhyun, remember that you wanted to see the great wall? Here I got a picture with some of my classmates.” I scanned my phone gallery and opened the picture.

“Here.” I held it in front of them. Sungyu was in awe but Baekhyun doesn’t seem to anticipate it.

Is there something wrong?

“I…I’ll get us some drinks.” He said to Sungyu before leaving the table.

“Hey unnie,” Sungyu called.

Unnie!?  “Yes?” i tried to smile but I can feel my temple beat and my eyebrow twitch.

“I know that you used to go out with Baekhyun, but I don’t think its appropriate to see him anymore since he’s going out with me now.” She said as she closed her arms on the table and held her chin with a hand.

Mwoh!? Is she trying to tell me to back off? Not seeing Baekhyun even as a friend?

“But he is my bestfriend before he became my boyfriend.”

“But still unnie~ don’t you think its inappropriate? Some may think you’re seducing him again from me.”

What the!? That does it!

I bolted up from my chair and about to yell at her who was surprised at my action.

“You-!”

“Minyeon? Is something wrong?” Baekhyun arrived back before I exploded.

“Nothing.” I gritted under my teeth while I fake a smile again. I looked at my watch and lied, “Ooops! Look at the time.” I tried to think up of something. “I told my mom that I’ll be with her after 30 minutes.” I picked up my stuff and placed them inside my bag and saw the gift that I was supposed to give to Baekhyun but I don’t think it’s the right time so I quickly left the place with my head flaming in furious.

Calm down Minyeon. You’re not there to compete. You just want to check on Baekhyun.

Baekhyun… I placed a hand on my chest. It hurts and feels empty.

__________

Again, a week had passed after the coffee shop incident. I was walking back from school when I saw Sungyu. I was about to call her,

“Sun-“

But then I saw her walk towards this tall guy and heard her call him “Oppa” as she locked arms with him.

“That two timing ! And she even told me that I couldn’t see Baekhyun anymore!?”

I followed them until they reach her house. I was at the alley and to my surprise someone else was also watching them. She seems serious and I didn’t want to bother her so I just creped above her to watch them also.

“Uhm… I don’t think I can go out with you anymore. I’m sorry! But I really like you! It’s just that…”

The guy’s eyes widened cause of the shock.

“Sun…gyu?”

“I’m really busy! That I don’t think I can still give you enough time!”

Sungyu starts sobbing.

“What the!? That flirt!” I can’t help but say it. I felt that the girl who is also watching is now looking at me. “Err…sorry.”

[Please use previous story(4TH DAY) as reference for this part]

we introduced ourselves and in an instant i could feel her and decided to help. i exchanged email with Seorin. she is a really nice girl and easy to be liked. too bad that that guy hadn't realized it yet.

While walking and exchanging mails with Seorin, i saw Sungyu again. but this time she's with a different guy. i moved in closer so i could hear their conversation.

"Oppa~ what about our 100 day anniversary?" She said as she ckutched the guy's arm.

"Let's just go to your favorite Ice Cream shop Sungyu-ah."

Now i have a plan. you just wait Choi Sungyu.

____________________

[Baekhyun! 
do want to go hang out? just the two of us!
i want to see the Ice cream place where you met Sungyu.]

So the plan was to get the boys to see Sungyu's true color.

We were walking along the road, already near the shop. i could see Sungyu seated near the window. Baekhyun hadn't noticed it yet but with a few feet away Baekhyun stops and looks at Sungyu. His expression doesn't seem to be like one in pain but rather shock. but i could see no pain. he walks near the window and tapped to get Sungyu's attention. He just tapped it with no word from his mouth. and when Sungyu noticed she mouthed, 'Baekhyun oppa?' and when she had noticed him, Baekhyun turned his back and left the shop. left me behind him.

__________________

So now here I am trying to catch him up til we reach the nearest park in the district.

"BYUN BAEKHYUN I SAID WAIT!" i yelled at him since i can't take it anymore. and it was effective since he stopped in an instant.

"I'm sorry for what happened." i apologized as i crouched on the ground hugging my knees. i could feel the tireness on my legs.

"It's okay. i already know that she's that kind of girl."

"What!?" i raised my head to look at him but his back was still on me.

"I...I went out with her because i thought that if I did... i could forget you... and she coulkd easily fill up these spaces in me." he opened his palm and spread it  in front of him to the bright sky. "Did you know that after you've left...it was like a part of me was missing. like how my hand covered these lights that's right in from of me."

i felt guilty. now I know the reason for his pained expression after seeing the picture. I looked like enjoying myself in China while Baekhyun was here struggling. i want to apologize. that's the inly thing that i can do. but i've already said sorry too much.

"i..." i don't know what to say but i'll just say what i feel. " i wish we could start over again."

He turned and now he is facing me. He smiled and said, "we can never go back..."

i felt hurt at what he said. because i wanted to go back to the way we were before. i could feel the tears flooding my eyes. as the tears fell, he caught it with his finger and said, "This is goodbye. but we can be a brand new person after this." he took my hand and sitted me on the bench and folded my hands on my lap and smiled, "Goodbye."

__________________

"Lu Han! Lay! Kris! Tao!" i called for the name of my friends from China who decided to visit Seoul. They were scattered all over the park curious about everything and partly sight-seeing. i sitted on a familiar bench and saw the markings almost erased.

[Goodbye Baek and Min. xx.xx.2012]

My fingers traced what's written and reminisce what had happen. 

It's been 5 months since then...

i closed my eyes and sighed.

"it's winter break right miss? why do you look so tired?" someone who sitted beside me said. i perked up since the voice is familiar.

"Baek-" i wasnt able to complete his name because he immediately held out his hand.

"I'm Byun Baekhyun." i stared at him for a moment, still stunned.

what do i do? should i take his hand?

Someone drew my hands out and clasped it with his. i turned to see who it was, Chaerin.

"I'm gonna go now. our tour group is on the roll." then she smiled at me and winked.

"uhh...I'm... Shim Minyeon..." i hope i didn't stutter.

"ahh... can I call you Min-ah?"

i can't help but blush. it was like fresh new start. I nodded at him.

"Seems like i have an affinity towards you. i can't help touching your hands." he said as he look at our hands. its been tanged for more than a minute then he flashed a smiled that could make anyone's heart sunk.

"It was like the missing puzzle had fit in." both of us said at the same time and laughed because we both knew that line when i first met him a few years ago.

"So Shim Minyeon. I think I'll be seeing you often."