And it hurts, and it hurts so bad
Our heart and lips say different things, must be hurtful
And it hurts, and it hurts so bad, forever in my heart
You're the only one, why don't you know, why don't you know, and it hurts

Shinhwa - Hurts

Recently, because of the extreme weather in South Korea, Minho has been feeling unwell and his head often feels like spinning around. He staggers making his way towards school and looks like as if he were going to slump onto the ground.

Of course, Taemin doesn’t fail to notice it. Of all things he always recognizes first, it is always about Minho.

He quickly notices the red face and heavy breath whenever Minho walks past him. Probably because he doesn’t easily get adjusted to the weather, but when Taemin looks it deeper, he assumes that Minho may have caught cold.

“ You should not push yourself too much,” Taemin mumbles, “ You’ll really get sick.”

“ I am fine,” Minho replies, “ It’s just.. the weather is really cold and I need longer time to adjust.”

Minho always has been the stubborn one here.

He massages his temples softly, feeling dizzy and he gets up. “ I am gonna sleep.”

Taemin gazes at the sweaty forehead and stands up. “ Wait – let me take care of you first, I’ll bring some medicines and hot wet cloth – “

“ I am okay,” Minho states again, his voice sounds so cold and full of rejection, “ Just leave me alone.”

Taemin slumps back into his seat and ducks his head, feeling upset.

He doesn’t know what Minho meant back then about they could start over again as ‘friends’.

Perhaps, perhaps, Minho didn’t really mean it, or he said that to make a certain boundary between them that Taemin can’t cross it more than he has done.

Yet, to Taemin, it feels unbearably painful too.

He has realized his feelings are completely different from Minho. That guy despises their ‘relationship’, and by using that way, he has created a line to keep himself from gone further to their engagement.

Being friends will never be the same for Taemin because he carries these feelings along with him – yet he has to accept. He wants to stay beside Minho, to watch over him close – and love him properly without looking creepy.

Or maybe he is, but after all, is it weird, wanting to stay beside him?

Taemin glances at the other side across him, pondering quietly.

Just when.. Minho can look properly at my eyes..

The next morning, everything has gone into chaos – as if Taemin had woken up on the wrong side of bed.

Mrs. Choi shrieks when Minho finally collapses because his temperature has gone really high – and Mr. Choi isn’t at home. She can’t skip her work because the deadline is today’s afternoon (she is an editor) and she also has a very important meeting. Taemin is fully troubled with the breakfast he has to make because Minho is finally sick now and he comes up with a decision to make porridge. He is quite good at cooking, but he doesn’t know the taste because this is the first time he makes porridge.

So when he ascends up to Minho’s room, he has found Mrs. Choi has been waiting for the porridge.

“ Ah, Taemin,” Mrs. Choi seems relieved, “ Can you help me to feed him?”

Taemin hesitates. “ I don’t think I..”

Mrs. Choi looks at him pleadingly.

“ Please?”

Taemin doesn’t know how much he is putting effort to refuse Mrs. Choi’s open request.

When Minho finally cracks open his left eye after three hours long, he is greeted with the warm sunlight pouring down through the window and wet towel on his forehead. He rises up slowly, dizziness hitting his head at instant when he tries to comprehend with the situation.

Right.. This morning, he just fainted.

He slowly gets off of the bed and goes downstairs, only to find no one in the house.

Mom has taken care of everything, I see..

Around this time, his parents should have gone to work and Taemin already went to school too. That’s why the house is really quiet now, and somehow, peaceful.

Minho sluggishly rests his legs on the couch and leans back slightly.

Speaking of which.. That guy.. What is he doing now, I wonder?

He always smiles softly whatever answer is given to him.

Does he always accept everything like that?

When Minho said that they could start as ‘friends’.. He doesn’t know where this will lead them, to be honest.

He can’t accept same engagement and marriage – so he decided to put them aside and maybe they can be friends first.

Yet again, it feels so hard for him to look at Taemin now.

Like.. if he meets his eyes, he will never be able to go back again.

For some reasons, Minho feels that those eyes contain so much longing feelings and small dejection. He doesn’t dare to look back – he still thinks it is really weird to have that kind of feelings towards a guy from a guy too, so he guesses that it’s because he’s straight.

Minho doesn’t deny that Taemin is really beautiful, too pretty that even most of girls lose compared to him.

It’s just that.. everything confuses him and feels awkwardly weird now.

Thank God he is sick today so he can have entire house alone for himself for the next five hours.

At least he needs a good space to calm his mind, first of all.

“ Do you feel heavy carrying those books alone, Taemin?”

A warm voice greets him from behind so Taemin turns around. If he doesn’t fail to recognize the name, that guy is Kai, his classmate. Taemin politely smiles and shakes his head. “ It’s nothing,” he replies, “ I can do this alone by myself.”

“ Nah, no,” Kai laughs and suddenly he takes a few books, “ I’ll help you. Let’s go.”

Taemin’s lips jut out a bit when he thinks that he is currently being treated as a girl – but it can’t be helped, though. He has to admit that these stuffs are pretty heavy, and he’s just glad that someone finally lends help.

“ Come to think of it,” Kai frowns, “ It’s rare to see Choi Minho isn’t present now. I heard he is sick.”

Hearing Minho’s name being said, Taemin gulps a little. Even though they are a year apart, Taemin successfully managed to jump one grade in the middle school because of his excellent brain, and somehow they end up being in the same class. Taemin guesses that it might be because of Mr. & Mrs. Choi’s work for putting them together.

“ I think so,” Taemin mumbles, “ The weather condition is not really nice, recently. Everyone can easily get sick.”

Kai giggles. “ Truthfully, Minho is one kind of strongest men here. We have P.E class tomorrow; I think he doesn’t want to pass it because we’ll be having soccer. I hope he’ll recover soon.”

“ You’re fine already?”

Both Taemin and Mrs. Choi are looking at Minho in amazement as the tallest man buttons his uniform one by one. “ Yeah, I had a sleep for exactly four hours yesterday when you were all out. Apparently the weather didn’t match with my body condition so I needed to rest.”

“ Whoa, good thing then,” Mrs. Choi bats her eyelashes amusedly, clearly thinking if she actually has a son whose strength is as strong as buffalo. “ I can’t even tell that you’re already well now.”

Minho glances at his mother and ignorantly continues dressing up. Taemin, who has been standing behind Mrs. Choi, watches the older man in awe. Perhaps no one should underestimate his stamina..

“ Today we have soccer in P.E class. It’ll be a pity if I skip that.”

.. and what a sport freak he is.

Mrs. Choi uncontrollably chuckles. “ Oh God, no wonder – wait a minute, I remember something..” then she runs towards her room and takes something out of a drawer. It is a small box engraved with ‘eternal happiness’ words on it.

“ Here,” she smiles, “ Your dad and I got this couple days ago, because we haven’t really found perfect things for your engagement, and Taemin’s parents have agreed too, so..”

The box turned out to be one containing two necklaces with silver rings as the pendants.

“ I know that you can’t wear jewelry at school, so we chose this, in case once you’re graduated, you can use the rings around your finger freely..” she explains, “ for each of you.”

Taemin’s eyes turn wide when he witnesses the gorgeous jewelries in the box. He gulps – it’ll be a lie if he says he hates this; because they look really pretty and shining.

But how about Minho?

“ Wear these, kids,” she coos, “ I insist.”

Minho quietly takes one and wears it around his neck, followed by Taemin. The younger boy looks at his fiancée and sighs inwardly.

He must be feeling incredibly awkward now, to think that we’re counted as new ‘friends’.

Taemin wishes how he could escape to somewhere and hole up.

He still thinks it’s better to stay away from Minho – or to put this simpler, not being too close with him.

It’s awkward, terribly. He can tell that Minho doesn’t really want any existence that makes him feel uncomfortable. Through silence, Taemin understands what is happening in Minho’s mind. Regardless how seldom they speak to each other, Taemin has been watching Minho quietly until now. Somehow, he can guess what Minho is thinking now.

Even though he said that they could be friends, but again, Taemin knows that he still doesn’t approve what has been decided.

And now, Taemin is anxious about what should he do now.

“ I’m going to school first,” Minho breaks the silence and walks past Taemin, “ See you later, Taemin.”

He nods responsively and gazes at the walking boy ahead him.

Unconsciously, Taemin clenches the necklace in his right hand and pulls it closer against his chest.

His heart is throbbing mad – yet he feels really warm, even though he is quite upset now.

Taemin thinks he should bear this feeling again for a while.. maybe.

Ever since he got P.E for the first time, he has never liked the subject. It’s not like he flunks, but because of his feminine appearance, people look at him while underestimating his skill. He’s not bad – well, he at playing soccer, but he’s good at running.

Unfortunately, today’s P.E is soccer so he needs to deal with his dislike.

Taemin sighs and looks down at his shoes, wondering if he can pass soccer now but to no avail. He walks sluggishly towards the field and sees Minho warming up, about six meters away from where he stands. Taemin smiles slightly to himself, not allowing anyone to see this expression.

They are not supposed to know about their engagement nor Taemin’s feelings, aren’t they?

And so, after some time taken for contemplating, the soccer match between two groups divided in the same class has started.

Taemin is in the opposite group with Minho, so the young boy is trying so hard to avoid the jock. He doesn’t want to have a match with him because a) he will make himself look fool b) that awkward feeling whenever he’s around Minho.

Taemin truly concentrates on the game (or avoiding Minho) that he can even forget to notice where the ball is now.

So when his name is being yelled – he fails to notice it quicker, and the next thing he knows, his head gets hit with the ball.

“ Oh God, I’m sorry, Taemin-sshi!” the culprit, named Chanyeol, expresses his guilt by rushing forwards. The beautiful boy winces in pain, but he quickly calms Chanyeol. “ No, I’m fine, see – “ but when he tries to prove, he stumbles and is about to fall, until Kai catches him right in time. “ Taemin!” Kai begins panicking, “ are you okay?!”

“ yeah, I’m just – “

But before Taemin can finish his answer, Kai has turned to the teacher and says, “ Sir, I’m going to take Taemin to infirmary so we can check if there’s something wrong.” And in second blink, Kai has lifted him and rested the skinny figure on his shoulder, then brings him away.

While, on the other hand, Minho has been watching silently from afar, and his expression slightly twitches at the sight.

“ I was really scared if something bad happened to you, Taemin.”

Taemin laughs at Kai’s childish tone. “ What the hell, Kai? Don’t worry, despite my appearance, I am not as weak as I may seem.”

“ But still..” Kai turns around and put a warm cloth, which has been wetted with hot water, on Taemin’s bump on the temple. “ I should have been around you so nothing would have happened.”

Taemin shakes his head and smiles. “ I am okay.. why are you so worried of me?”

At the question, Kai glances up and stares into Taemin’s brown orbs deeply – as if he were going to pull Taemin any further and draw him closer, and closer – but Taemin, on the other hand, just moved his fingers ever too faintly.

He doesn’t know how to response the deep stare, and the silence is broken when suddenly Kai Taemin’s cheek tenderly.

“ Isn’t it obvious?” Kai whispers, and Taemin raises one of his brows slowly.

“ About what..?’

Kai stops the and cups the apple cheek gently, full of affection and warmth, hoping that they can be delivered to the boy before him.

“ I like you.”

Taemin’s eyes widen at the sudden confession.

And as if it weren’t enough, suddenly the door flings open widely.

Both of boys in the infirmary turn their heads together and of course, the beautiful boy’s jaws are almost hung open.

He can’t believe at the sight in front of him – and how that sight is apparently looking at the position Kai and Taemin are doing now.

“ M – Minho Hyung..”

Kai turns at Taemin now. Even though Minho is older than him, Taemin never calls his classmates ‘hyung’ even until now – even towards anyone, although Taemin is literally younger than the others.

‘Hyung’?

Taemin clearly looks shocked when Minho steps in.

As if he wanted to tell Minho that, it’s not like what you see!

Taemin holds his breath when Minho quietly approaches them. He is still expressionless as ever, but to Kai – maybe they’re both naturally men with same instincts, unlike the naïve Taemin – that..

He notices something changed..

Taemin stands up immediately. He stutters. He staggers a bit when he tries to stand upright.. and his adam apple bobs up and down as Minho is gradually getting closer to him.

“ This is from the teacher,” he speaks, “ ointment for the bump. Still hurt?”

The beautiful boy shakes his head slowly, anxiously, but Minho keeps standing still on the same spot and his gaze is cloudy – Taemin can not read Minho’s mind at all. He doesn’t understand.

Or maybe, he’s too scared to understand.

“ Thank you..” he stutters a little as he accepts the ointment shakily.

That time, Kai notices something has been going really weird since he came.

“ Okay then,” Minho nods once and turns around, about to leave the shocked boy behind him.

He just takes a few steps forwards when suddenly Kai stops him.

“ Choi Minho!”

The jock halts his feet without looking back. Kai, at first, hesitates a moment but he throws away his pride and decides to confront right now.

“ What is your relationship with Taemin?”

Taemin stiffens, looking very taken aback at the question.

How should he answer?

Right – ‘friends’.

Taemin should be able to answer like that.

But strangely, he can’t say anything.

Have I really accepted that we’re just ‘friends’ now?

“ Nothing,” Minho replies in a low voice, “ I am just his classmate, like you, and the teacher only told me to bring that for him.”

And just like that, it punches Taemin straight mentally – his eyes turn wider and his chest heaves up.

‘Maybe we can know each other better.. starting from ‘friends’.’

Just that, Taemin feels wrong, and dejected.

Which part of that answer.. that means ‘friends’?

He bits the lower lip harshly and clenches his fist tight.

Did he really mean his words when he said that we could be friends?

Or is it just a boundary he creates so we won’t cross any line further than this?

Taemin flutters his eyes close..  that he tries his best to surpass the tears.

He can feel the ring under the uniform he is wearing now, and it adds the loneliness and pain more in his heart.

And It hurts so bad..

a/n: WHOA 78 SUBSCRIBERS O___O Thank you so much T____T i love you all and i'll try my best not to disappoint my readers <3