Dear Diary,

I am so confused right now.

Today was…one of those really bad and super weird days I guess.

I seem to be having a lot of those days recently for some reason.

I wish I knew why my life was so retardedly difficult compared to other people’s lives.

I have so many things going on around me already that I really don’t need any more drama in my life.

Today is the beginning of our Thanksgiving holiday.

And Angel, Jackie and Cyndi came over at about 10.45 am but I got home at about 11am because I had to drop my sister off at her friends place seeing as she’s staying over night at a friends house too.

So anyways, the first thing when they came inside my house was to put their things in their rooms (obviously) but also, they sat me down and told me something that I really don’t want to recall but I think I should.

At least get it out on paper.

So, they had brought along Jason Kim’s phone with them.

I had sat in front of them and they played an audio.

I don’t particularly remember most of the conversation so I can’t rewrite it all on paper, sorry, but I do remember one thing.

Darren wants to “play” with me.

He’s using me…

Maybe not necessarily to gain popularity amongst the student body but to add me onto the list of his girlfriends…

I can’t believe how I had trusted him!

Although, when I first heard it, I didn’t believe my friends.

And I even shouted at them!

Now that I think about it, I should really apologise to them tomorrow morning about shouting at them.

So anyways, I ended up running out of my house.

I don’t remember exactly how long I had run for; I just remember having run and then stopping.

And then well, Darren called me.

He asked me how my Thanksgiving was beginning.

And I can’t believe myself, but I actually believed that he would never do anything like that to me.

Or at least I believed him for the first few minutes, until I saw him sitting under a tree, two girls flanking his sides.

I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M SO NAÏVE!!!

See?

This is why guys SHOULD NOT BE TRUSTED!!!

So anyways, and then this guy went up to him and he asked Darren who was calling and he actually said “my play toy”.

O.M.G!!!

TALK ABOUT HUMILIATION!!!

I repeat once again, GUYS SHOULD NOT BE TRUSTED!!!

Man, my hand hurts from writing all the caps…

But I’m not done yet!!!

So anyways, and then I ran away crying and Cyndi found me on the ground half way to my house and she took me back.

I told my friends what I saw that they didn’t say anything.

I love them.

Their just so understanding…

I now feel really bad about having not been hanging around them lately (you know? I said that in the last entry!).

So, after that, the day started out pretty normal, we went to a centre called South Centre (weird name I know = =) and went shopping the whole day!

Basically, South Centre is like a large shopping mall!

We came home at like, 10pm?

Lolz~

Its Thanksgiving yes, and I can’t believe the centre was still open but, yeah, whatever.

So, we went to bed at about 11.30.

So, it’s 1.30am at the moment and I’m writing in you in the kitchen.

Yes, the kitchen.

Cyndi’s sleeping in my room.

I had to wait for her to start snoring (lightly for that matter!) before I could sneak out with you and write this.

Anyways, just before she fell asleep, she was asking me some things that I REALLY have to talk to you about!

She asked me if I loved Darren.

I answered her I don’t know.

And I honestly do not know.

But then Cyndi told me that I DO like him…

Obviously I denied.

But then, using her annoying logic, she explained to me WHY she thinks I love Darren.

Apparently, it was because I was bawling when I saw Darren with the two girls and calling me his “play toy”.

I guess that’s logical…sort of.

I mean seriously, wouldn’t anyone cry if the guy you thought was your friend was just using you to gain popularity?!

I’m pretty sure I won’t be the only one…so that doesn’t mean I love him right?

I mean, care for him, yes, that’s obvious but love? Are you sure?

I don’t think so….

But then Cyndi, Angel and Jackie all think that I love him…

*SIGHS*

I’ve been sighing a lot lately with Cyndi.

She’s just so logical that it sometimes get’s on my nerves!

But then again, because she’s so logical, she keeps the three of us on track, especially me!

I should go now…

My head hurts from all this Darren business…

I need some good rest time with my friends.

I’ll deal with him when the time comes to deal with him.

I don’t want him to ruin my Thanksgiving!

Night!

*YAWN*

Hella tired!

Byee!