Because We're Not Like Others

Jun Hyung POV

            I know one thing for sure in my life is that I'm not suppose to feel the way I do right now here in this chest of mine. My eyes followed his figure silently as he walked into the kitchen. Swiftly, I got up from the sofa and followed his back, leaving the other members behind watching themselves performing, making fun of each other in some music award rerun.

            “What are you doing?” I asked. He jumped at my sudden voice.

            “Trying to make some warm milk. You want some?” Yo Seob lifted his head from the fridge to smile at me.

            “Mm. No. I don't really like milk.” He made  face then turn back to the fridge trying to find the carton of milk.

            “Milk is good for your bones. Don't be picky. Oh, a-ha!” he exclaimed and pulled out a carton of milk then proceed to the counter and poured it into a large cup before putting it into the microwave. My eyes followed his every move in silence and my gaze stopped at his face.

            A weird, foreign feeling formed in my chest when I saw there were dark shadows under his eyes from tiredness thanks to our endless schedule and his face was very pale. In just two steps I closed the distance between us. From where I stood, less than a foot away from him, I could smell his shampoo.

            “What's wrong?” he smiled. “Got a sudden desire for some milk?”

            Involuntarily, my hand lifted by itself and brush his cheek gently. He was slightly taken aback by my action and blushed ever so slightly.

            “Haha, what are you doing?” he asked not moving away.

            “You look really pale, have you been eating properly recently?” I asked, my hand still on his cheek.

            “I'm fine. I eat my meals on time everyday.” he took a tiny step backwards and bumped into the kitchen counter. He was trapped when I took a step forward, my eyes studying him. He looked up, his dark glassy eyes glowed in the dark.

            “Yo Seob ah, don't lie to me.” I mumbled.

            “Fine. Fine. I'll eat properly tomorrow.” he pouted turning away after staring at me for a few moments, his hair fell into his eyes in the process. Before he could do anything, my stupid hand with a mind of its own gently brushed it away and our touch this time was like an electricity shock. Both of us were stunned, mesmerized in each other's eyes.

            “What are you two doing?!” a loud voice interrupted us as we jumped away from each other. I turned to see Dong Woon giving us a funny look as he rummaged the fridge.

            “Nothing, just talking.” Yo Seob laughed nervously, carefully avoiding my eyes.

            “Has anyone seen the milk?” Dong Woon asked as he turned around to us. “Oh! There it is!” he exclaimed at the sight of the carton sitting not far away from us.

            “Dong Woon ah,” I said. “You don't need milk anymore. You're tall enough.”

            “Then why don't you drink some to extend your vertical size a bit.” he mumbled but loud enough for me to hear.

            And so, a chase was started around the kitchen with our little maknae screaming like a girl while Yo Seob laughed and laughed, his laughter that was musical to my ears.

            These feelings deep inside this chest of mine. I'm sure I'm not supposed to have it.

Yo Seob POV

            I couldn't remember when did it start that when I look into his eyes, my heart would do this funny jump in my chest and I would get all restless and nervous.

            Jun Hyung. Our group's rapper. People always misunderstand him by his cold and cool attitude. Deep inside, I know he is a sensitive guy with a very kind heart.

            The next morning we all woke up early. Well, it was Doo Joon, our leader, who woke us up to be exact. We had a performance in the afternoon so we had to stop by at the saloon for our make ups and hairs.

            It was a dull, gray winter morning when we loaded into our manager's van. The six of us were squashed together inside the small space of the vehicle. Hyun Seung who sat at the front with Gi Kwang and leader kept complaining loudly about how Gi Kwang's over sized and thick coat was eating up all the space and was squashing him while Gi Kwang kept shushing him or say something rude back to him. In seconds, the whole van was filled with their loud bickering while Doo Joon tried to stop them. Dong Woon who sat beside us had his head phones on and was singing along loudly without a care in the world.

            Jun Hyung closed his eyes and frowned in annoyance. While me? I just sat by the window shivering in cold. I had never been good with winter. No matter how many layers I wear or how many years of winter I’d already went through. I am forever cold.

            “Manager!!” I shouted over the voices to the front.

            “What?!” he shouted back in reply.

            “Turn up the heat please! It's so cold!”

            “Sorry Seobbie! The heater is broken! Wear a scarf or something and will the three of you at the front keep quiet?!”

            I leaned back to my seat and sighed. My fingers were so cold that I was afraid they would drop off. I looked out the window at the snow piling on everything in sight and sighed again. My heart cursed the season with every bad word I know.

            “Yo Seob ah,” Jun Hyung called me. I turned to meet his eyes.

            “Mm?”

            “What's wrong? You don't look happy.”

            “Because it's winter.” I mumbled. Jun Hyung raised one side of his eye brows at me.

            “You feel cold?”

            “Very.” was my short answer as he chuckled lightly. Jun Hyung took off his black scarf from around his neck.

            “Here. Put this on.” he handed me the scarf.

            “What? No, you'll get cold.” I declined pushing his hands away.

            “Tsk. I'm fine.” and with that, he wrapped the scarf around my neck. I realized Jun Hyung is not very good at tying scarf so the two of us battled with the black cloth until it was right.

            “Your hands feel so cold. Why aren't you wearing any gloves?” he asked sternly after our hands bumped into each other a few times in the process of wearing the black scarf.

            I shrugged. “I forgot I guess.” I mumbled into the scarf, catching a very comfortable, an indescribable scent from the scarf. I sniffed again and Jun Hyung caught that.

            “I just washed it last week and I had only worn it twice, excluding today.”

            “No,” I smiled. “It smells very nice. Smells like you.” I said without thinking.

            Jun Hyung raised his brows a little in surprise and smiled his rare smile. Without warning, he reached out a hand and caught mine.

            “Your fingers are going to fall off if you keep this up.” he said rolling his eyes though we both knew he was just exaggerating. Something in my chest felt weird. His fingers around mine felt very warm and comfortable. Warmer than any gloves in the world. I stared at our hands that were intertwined and were resting on my lap and wondered, how could this feel so good and look so right?

            Our hands together looked like they were born to be together. My heart thumped hard in my chest at his nice, comfortable smell from the scarf and the warm feeling from his hand and the heat from his body beside me. Before I knew it, I fell asleep.

Jun Hyung's POV

            I stared at our hands that were rested on his lap. How can anything feel and look so right and natural? From where I sat beside him, I caught a tiny scent of his hair and he looked so cute like a kid in my oversized scarf.

            Slowly, from the corner of my eyes I saw his eyes closed and soon he was fast asleep on my shoulder. My heart fluttered in my chest. A small smile lifted the corner of my lips as I watched our lead singer sleep peacefully.

            Dong Woon beside me suddenly sat up straight as though he was shocked.

            “What?” I asked him.

            “No, nothing. It's just so cold and I can't listen to my music in peace with the noise from the front.” he said pulling his ear phones out. He turned to look as us and peeked at Yo Seob and giggled.

            “He looked very comfortable sleeping.” he commented. “I guess I'll just make myself comfortable too.” he then mumbled to himself before leaning onto my other shoulder.

            I frowned. “Yah! Dong Woon ah!” but he was either ignoring me or already gone into his slumber world. So I spent the next hour with two lousy sleepy heads on my shoulders.

            We got to our performance destination after stopping at the saloon for a few hours. We all got to work as soon as we get there and workers rushed us here and there to do our rehearsals and clothes fitting and a thousand of other tasks. During lunch, Yo Seob was no where to be seen. Holding my coke in one hand, I walked around looking for that little lead singer.

            Much to my annoyance and worry, he was no where to be seen. Beside the stage was a little door. I stared at it for a few seconds and pondered. Could he have gone out this way? Following my instinct, I went out the door and cold slapped me hard. Snow was piled on everything in sight outside. I needed to squint to see that there was actually a playground. I sighed, watching my own breathe in the air and walked around a bit, pulling my large coat closer to my body.

            I was about to get on the swing when I caught a figure sitting alone not very far away on a bench under a big tree. I took a few steps forward and squinted again and saw it was none other than our little lead singer.

            He sat hugging his knees to his chest and his face hidden behind his knees. His hair was waving gently in the cold bitter wind and I frowned. How could he come out in such a terrible weather dressed like that? In just a few steps, I was already standing in front of him. His hands were gripped in firm fists, red and shaky from the cold. Well, to be specified, his whole body was shaking.

            “Yo Seob ah, what are you doing here?” I called out to him. He lifted his face looking pale and miserable.

            “Jun Hyung ah” he moaned like a little kid. My heart melted into immediate concern.

            “What's wrong? Are you alright?” I squatted down in front of him. He pouted and shook his head.

            “It's too cold.” he mumbled putting his face back on his knees. I sighed. Such a big baby.

            “Of course it's cold out here. There's snow everywhere and you're not wearing enough.” I said sternly but he ignored me. I sighed again.

            “Yo Seob ah.” slowly he lifted his head again. “Let's go inside okay? I know you still haven’t had your lunch yet.”

            He shook his head. “I don't want to go back inside. It's too suffocating.” I was silent for a few seconds. I knew what he meant.

            “Alright then,” I finally said. “I guess I'll just sit here.” without waiting for any reply, I sank down beside him. I turned my head to study him. He was resting his chin on his knees by then staring out to space, around his neck was my black scarf. A gush of wind blew and both of us shivered.

            “Are you alright? Do you want my coat?” I offered while he violently shook his head. Of course he doesn't want my coat, he knew I'll be the one that will be cold if I gave him my coat. I rubbed my temples, praying to any God above to guide me to do the right thing. 

            I ped my coat.

            “Yo Seob ah,” I called.

            “Hmm?” he answered not looking at me.

            “Come here,” I said patting my lap as he turned to look at me.

            A red hue immediately colored his cheeks.

            “What are you saying?” he frowned in confusion and stood up as though wanting to run away. I grabbed his hand and pulled him onto my lap. He yelp and tried to escape but stopped when he felt warmth from my body.

            “Better?” I said softly. Instead of answering, he shifted sideways and rest his legs beside my hand on the bench and timidly rested his head on the crook of my neck like a baby.

            Without trying to, I felt my lips tugged into a smile. With my two hands, I pulled my coat to cover him too and hugging him in the process, pulling him closer to my body.

            My heart started to thump hard in my chest. Feelings inside me stirred when I once again caught the scent of his hair.

            These feelings, dear God, I know I'm not supposed to have.

Yo Seob's POV

            He pulled me into his lap. My heart jerked loud and wild and he pulled me back when I tried to escape. His chest, his whole body felt so warm, without realizing, I slowly made myself comfortable on his lap and rest my head on him.

            Until the day I die, I will never forget that moment when we were so close together, I could smell his smell so close to me. His broad chest and shoulder that I was leaning on felt so reliable and strong and comfortable. It was very confusing, yet so blissful. Staying there forever was all I wanted. Slowly, he pulled his large thick coat and covered both of us hugging me in process. I had never been that close to anyone other than my mum when she hugged and kissed me goodbye on my first day of primary school.

            The feeling of his arms around me. Strong and firm. Like they could shield everything bad away and let me feel reassured. Am I allowed to feel like this?  

            Love begins with a tiny spark of flame. It is warm and so magical at the same time. It brightens your life like a fire in a vast darkness inside your chest. Without realizing, these feelings will grow stronger and stronger, this fire will burn brighter and brighter. Too much of love, will we burn ourselves one day?

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 Hi! Author speaking here~ This is my very first JunSeob fanfic and befoe this, I'd only written anime fanfictions...Hope you guys enjoy and look forward to my new chapter... And please, excuse my crappy grammar... Hope you enjoyed this~