I closed the photo album pretty much as soon as I opened it.

I took a deep breath inhaling as much air as my lungs could handle.

Six years ago I made a promise to myself. A promise that I broke a thousand times.

Never cry Chaerin~

Why did I have to be born?

I should have suicided years ago, when I wasn’t sane enough. But I can’t do it now.  Too many responsibilities. How ironic. Wanting to just drop dead but not being able to because I have this delusion that things may turn better.

Yes, I tend to fool myself actually believing that things will get better. Of course they won’t. It’s my life that we are talking about.

I had to be born ugly, poor, awkward and painfully shy. Don’t get me started about the unpopular thing.

They say that whatever goes around comes around right? Well not in my story.

I checked my phone.

Time to leave from this place I frequently like to call home.

I slowly stood up as I dusted off my clothes.

Totally black.

Exactly the way I hate.

Then why exactly am I wearing them? Well there is a reason to mourn. But I can’t tell you why just yet.

I took my bag as I checked my reflection on the mirror.

Ugly as always.

I quickly locked the door and headed down the stairs.

I could use the elevator but I highly doubt that it will take me down any faster.

I stopped at the bus stop and waited impatiently.

I sat down on the bench as I took out the pack of cigarettes I had on my jacket.

I don’t smoke but today is a special day.

A really hard day awaits me.

The bus finally arrived and I took off.

I kept looking outside the window, blocking everyone out.

I tried not to think of what awaited me but I couldn’t help it.

I got off the bus as I finally arrived at the station. I walked for about 10 minutes when I finally arrived at the house.

It was actually a huge house and I wondered if I had come at the right one.

I took a step forward as I rung the bell.

“Who is this?” I heard an electronic voice ask.

“It’s Chaerin. Lee Chaerin.” I replied.

“Come in.” I heard the voice say as the gates finally opened.

 I walked through a garden filled with pink roses.

A forced smile took the place of my previous blank expression.

I was pretty sure that this is what I would see.

I took some slow steps, my breath suddenly becoming uneven.

I placed my hand over my chest.

Calm down Chaerin. This is not the time, nor the place.

I lightly knocked on the door as I tried to smile.

The door suddenly opened and here was the person I really didn’t feel like seeing ever again.

“Hello Chaerin.”

I breathed out as I took a step closer.

“Jiyong”