“You don’t know?” Hoya asked and couldn’t help but how shocked he was. He wasn’t expecting to hear such a thing. Sure, he wasn’t expecting the older man to throw himself in his arms and confess his deep love, but at the same time he wasn’t expecting Dongwoo to say he didn’t know how he didn’t felt. How was that possible?  Like…It wasn’t the hardest thing in the world. He just had to say ‘I love you too’ or ‘sorry but let’s just be friends’. How hard could that be? It should be something obvious, not something that was hard or painful. “How can you not know?”  Hoya asked and the older just looked down to his hands. What was he suppose to say and do without making the younger kill him? He was pretty sure Hoya was ready to explode, and honestly, he couldn’t remember him and he really wasn’t going to. Especially after hearing “I love you” so many times. It still made him rather uncomfortable, but he didn’t know what to do against it.

It just made him feel lost and like his heart was going to burst. Dongwoo felt so lost at that time. “I love you.” Dongwoo looked to the younger man and Hoya just raised a brow not understanding a single thing. “What did you said?” Dongwoo asked and the younger man just rolled his eyes. “I asked you if you hate me! And you clearly do.” Hoya stopped holding the man’s hand and just started walking back and forward inside the room. He was pretty sure that if he did that for a long time he would make a whole. Dongwoo looked down to his feet and tried his best to think of the right words he should tell the younger man without making him go insane or crazy. “Can’t you…give me time?” He asked. He needed to think, he needed to put his thoughts in order before he could give an answer. “You shouldn’t need time. You should just know!”

Dongwoo could hear the pain in the younger man’s words.  “You have to understand my side Hoya. This is all unexpected. I mean…you…of all people? That is something I would never think of.” Hoya just rolled his eyes. It didn’t matter. All that the older man was saying didn’t matter at all. Not one bit. Because it wasn’t what he wanted to know.  “I’m pretty sure it wasn’t easy for you to admit that you…that you love me.” Dongwoo said with a serious face even thought he was feeling his face burning. He wasn’t sure of how to deal with all of this. He was sure the younger man was probably saying things he shouldn’t. Maybe he wasn’t in love at all. Maybe he was just feeling something else and he thought it was love. “It wasn’t.” Hoya said bluntly.

“It wasn’t hard at all.” Dongwoo was sure that now he was feeling worse than before. God, why was Hoya being like that? He wasn’t used on having the younger man being so…direct. It was weird, uncomfortable and didn’t felt as right as many people thought it would be.  All women wanted a love confession from Hoya. But he wasn’t a woman. “It was hard to say it out loud.” Hoya paused and passed a hand through his hair. “God Hyung…who knows for how long I’ve felt this way. For all I know, I’ve been feeling like this since the first time I saw you.” The older could feel his cheeks burn. God, why couldn’t Hoya have said that before? That alone was a way better love confession than the previous one. At least now, Dongwoo didn’t felt like he was the worst thing that happened to mankind and he would feel a little lighter.

But even like this, Dongwoo was feeling horrible. “But fine…if you don’t want me I get it. I’ll just leave you alone and pretend we never had this conversation and that I never confessed.” Hoya opened his bedroom door and took a deep breath. The older didn’t need to hear anything. He knew what this was for. He knew why Hoya was standing there holding the door. He looked so crushed, he looked so sad that Dongwoo lost all his strength to move. “I’m” before he could continue Hoya spoke. “Don’t say you’re sorry. If you do I swear I’ll break your face.”

Well, at least the same old Hoya was still alive and wasn’t completely gone. “Because that is even worse than saying you want to be just friends.” Hoya wasn’t the most experience person when it came to relationships but he knew what the usual lines a person used to dump someone else. He had used them. Usually he would say he was too busy with his career or was glad to be alone and didn’t want anyone to bother him because he could get distracted. One time he said that he was young and had to be single to enjoy life. But now he was feeling the exact same thing all those people he rejected felt and even more. Maybe it was Karma. If it was, he finally understood why people said Karma was a .

“I’m just asking for a little bit of time Hoya. Is it that hard?” Dongwoo asked not even realizing what he was saying. “Yes it is!” The younger was on the verge of exploding and right now, he didn’t really care if Dongwoo got upset at him or not. “How can it be not hard? You’re telling me to wait! You’re telling me to wait so you’ll know if you love me or not. I don’t want to wait. I want you now. I want you to say you love me back now. I want to rub in Woohyun face that we’re way better than the ing annoying Woogyu couple.” Hoya could feel his cheeks burn as he talked. He had no idea why he was saying those things. And to make it worst, he didn’t seem to care he was saying all of those things. He didn’t even know he felt like that until the words came out. “I just want to be with you. I want you all for myself. Is that wrong?”

Dongwoo swallowed hard and took a couple of steps closer to the younger one. He never imagined that a small room could feel so big. Hoya was just messing with his brain and he hated it. He couldn’t think, he couldn’t speak. Why did things have to be so darn difficult? They should be easy. They should be as easy as breathing. “Why do you want me?” Dongwoo managed to ask and he couldn’t help but see the embarrassed face from the younger one. The last time he saw him like that was when Woohyun publicly said Hoya behaved like a baby next to their noonas to get some attention. “How should I know? I just do. I just want you to be with me. I don’t want you to be with anyone else. Specially Myungsoo. I swear, if you touch him again I might lose it and kill him with my bare hands.”

“Do you hate Myungsoo?” Dongwoo couldn’t help but ask. He really wanted to know. It wasn’t normal someone act like that. Or was it? “No. I just hate when you two are together and act like a ing couple. Do you know how disturbing it is? Do you know how  disgusting you two can be?” The older man couldn’t help but raise a brow and smirk when he heard that. He moved a little closer and slowly, with his hand shacking a little he grabbed Hoya’s shirt and pulled the younger closer to him. “No…are we that obnoxious?” He asked and the younger nodded with a very angry face. He didn’t even realize the older was moving closer until their noses bumped together. Hoya was confused but he didn’t want to jump to conclusions.  The last time he did that he regretted it really bad. “Yes. You two annoy me so freaking much…I envy Myungsoo so much.”

Dongwoo couldn’t help but be surprised with that even thought he really shouldn’t. “I want to be that obnoxious, I want to be that disgusting with you…I want Myungsoo out. I want to be the one you hold. The one you laugh with, the one you read stupid things online…” Hoya noticed he was saying too much so he just stopped talking and  just looked to Dongwoo with hopeful eyes. He didn’t know what to expect, he really didn’t. Anything could happen now.  “So? What’s your answer?” He asked as he closed his eyes, not being able to stare to the older. “My answer is…”