Note from the author: To save confusion, everything said in ENGLISH will be in BOLD font.

Listen, can you feel it?  My heart is racing (My heart is breaking).  With an angry heart, I cried and I shouted, “HA!” 

*What an appropriate song*, you tiredly observe as you roll over to turn Kai and Baekhyun off, *It’s like they know…*

Over a month has passed since your last night at EXO’s dorm, and things still have not progressed any further with Kris.  When you’re together it’s like the kiss never happened, but two can play at that game, right?

“Aigoo”, you groan as you swing your legs off of the bed like a ninety year old woman and let your feet welcome the cool floor.  Summers in England are absolutely nothing to compare with those in Seoul, and it’s safe to say that you’ve been struggling to acclimatise.  Heading to your kitchen you turn on your new Nespresso machine and wait for the green light to stop flashing.  Once it’s ready you pop the capsule in and let the smell of fresh coffee engulf you.

*There’s nothing better than fresh coffee first thing in the morning*, you smile to yourself before letting your erted side run free, *Unless it’s Lee Minho bringing me fresh coffee in bed shirtless after spending the night*.  

Munja Wa Shong.  Munja Wa Shong.

Your text tone brings you back from your daydream and you struggle to find your phone within the depths of the covers on your bed.  It’s Minhye.

'Only five days until I get to see your face again!'

That’s right, Minhye arrives on Thursday.  *I should probably head out to buy a futon and some spare sheets*, you consider as you send a reply: 'I know!  I cannot wait!  I had better stock up the snack cupboard ready for your descent!'

Throwing your phone back onto your bed, you fetch your coffee and add a generous splash of hazelnut milk.  You riffle through the bottom cabinet and pull out an open box of ‘Hello Panda’ biscuits.  *I should probably hide these somewhere else*, you muse as you tip a nearly full packet of cigarettes and a lighter out of the box, *Minhye would not be pleased*.

After pulling one free from the packet with your teeth, you grab your coffee and head outside.  Even though it’s only 8am the sun is already beating down strongly, so you cling to the wall in an effort to retain as much shade as possible.  Taking a long toke of your cigarette, you watch the hustle and bustle of shop workers preparing to open.  *I’m so glad I get weekends off*, you inwardly sigh in relief, *I love the children, but having a little break from their antics is good too*.  You close your eyes and let the now familiar sounds of the city engulf you.  You can’t believe you’ve already been here for over half a year.  Taking another toke, you begin to compile a shopping list in your head: milk, food, lots of snacks, futon, bedding, towels, a cheeky stop in Etude House.  Perfect.

Munja Wa Shong.  Munja Wa Shong.

Hearing your phone once again, you stub out your cigarette and head back inside.  As you unlock your phone you take a sip of coffee, but before you have swallowed it you see that the text is from Kris, causing the coffee to end up splattered across the floor instead.

“Aish!”, you exclaim as you grab the closest towel and use it to mop the floor, “What’s with that reaction?”

Taking a deep breath you look at the message: “I’ll be at yours in ten minutes”.  Nothing more.

“Why is he still playing it so cool?”, you ask your Rilakkuma bear in despair, “A little more information would have been nice”.

Instead of replying you chuck your phone onto the closest surface and quickly slide across to the closet.  Feeling strapped for time you grab the combination you’ve been wearing the most these days - distressed dark wash denim shorts with cream lace detailing around the bottom and a plain cream baggy see-through shirt with pleats across the back that dip to below your shorts.  For jewellery you keep it simple and fasten a thin gold chain with a ring attached to it around your neck and shove on a couple of your favourite midi rings.  Making your way into the bathroom you decide to tie your long dark hair into a messy top knot, completed with a cute muted pink and cream polka dot bow underneath the bun.  For makeup you predict that waterproof mascara and tinted lip balm are enough because anything else would probably melt off your face within minutes.  Finally you spray yourself with Etude House’s Cherry Blossom Body Mist and clean your teeth.

“Jae?”, you hear Kris’s voice calling from outside.

“It’s open”.

As you watch the door open, you are surprised to see a pirate Alpaca plush and a huge bouquet of beautiful dark red roses rather than Kris.

“What’s all this?”, you ask, still rather confused.

Kris steps in and flashes his gorgeous smile: “I thought Rilakkuma could use a friend.  His name is Ace 2.0”.

“2.0?”

“Well, I wasn’t about to give you mine”, he smirks before handing the roses to you, “And these are to say sorry for being so quiet lately”.

No one has ever bought you flowers before, so you don’t really know what the correct reaction is.  You don’t even know if you have a vase to put them in. 

“Thank you, Kris”, you beam as a sense of warmth encloses your heart and their mesmerising smell fills your lungs, “They’re beautiful”.

“Just like me”, he playfully winks.

For now you simply fill up the sink and rest them in it: “I’ll buy a vase for them later.  They should be okay like this for now, right?”

Kris shrugs.  Clearly neither of you have spent much time with flowers.

“So why are you here?”, you question, even more confused by his impromptu early morning visit now.

“Can a guy not just bring a girl flowers because he feels like it?”

You think about this for a moment, but you know Kris, this is definitely not ‘his style’: “Kris…”

He goes quiet, as if at a loss for words.  You worry that what he’s about to say will hurt you, so you casually take a sip of your lukewarm coffee in an effort to hide your face.

“I’m leaving for China on Wednesday and won’t be back for a couple of weeks”.

You don’t respond.

“We’re appearing on a show called Happy Camp on the 21st and the company have decided to give us a week break with our families after”.

*I can’t really be mad at him for being busy with work or family*, you frown slightly before continuing with a smile: “That’s good then.  You haven’t visited them in ages”.

“Yeah, I don’t think I’ve seen my family for over a year”, he affirms whilst surveying your face, “You’re upset we won’t be here whilst Minhye is visiting”.

You nod and let out a small sigh: “I was looking forward to us all hanging out together”.

*And her meeting her future husband*.

“EXO-K will still be here”, he points out in an effort to cheer you up, “Plus, Chen and Xiumin will come back once we’ve finished filming”.

Thinking about this for a second, you feel your heart lighten.  *At least Minhye will get to meet her Mr. Right*, you try to think positively, *And we can still have fun dancing with Kai*.

“It’s okay, Kris”, you reassure him with the biggest smile you can provide, “I’m sure the two of us girls will manage just fine”.

Munja Wa Shong.  Munja Wa Shong.

“I really need to change that”, you chuckle lightly before retrieving your phone from the desk.

‘Usual spot for an early brunch?  The rest of us are already on route’.

You haven’t been out with the girls for a couple of weeks, so you quickly reply: ‘Be there in 10!’

Turning to look at Kris you can’t help but notice that he looks more tired than usual.  *Having a short break with his family will do him good*, you lovingly conclude, *Besides, Minhye will no doubt be keeping me on my toes*.

Kris notices you quietly observing him: “I should probably get going… They’ll wonder where I’ve run off to”.

“Me too”, you warmly smile as you grab your sunglasses and burnt orange satchel, and slip on a pair of leopard print vans, “I’ll walk you down”.

            *    *    *

“Jae, over here!”, Eunseo waves from the other side of the small cafe.

“We’ve already ordered your usual”, Serah affirms once you’ve sat down, “Cool?”

You smile and push your sunglasses up, “Cool!”

As you place your bag neatly under the table, you can’t help but feel like you are being watched.  Glancing up you see that you have four pairs of eyes analysing you with a mix of concern and curiosity.

“What?”, you lightheartedly laugh as you lean back in the chair, “Do I have something on my face?”

Yunghee leans across the table and squints suspiciously at you: “Something happened”.

Feeling flabbergasted, you remain quiet and instead let the waitress that has just arrived with your order change the subject.

“Thank you”, you beam as she places the avocado and friend egg toast in front of you, along with an iced rose latte, “Just what I need”.

After taking a quick sip of your latte, you turn to Eunseo: “No work today then?”

“Not in till one”, she responds as she cuts into her blueberry pancakes, “But don’t try to change the subject”.

Wishing your friends weren’t as sharp sensed, you stare down at the yolk of your egg as if it is going to tell you what to do.

“What happened?”, Serah asks, you can hear the genuine concern in her voice.

You pick up your knife and slice straight through the yolk that has just betrayed you: “It’s nothing, don’t worry about it”.

“Jae…”, Eunseo coos as she takes your left hand into hers and pats it gently, “I’ve been married for over two years already, so I have no choice but to live vicariously through you”.

Her statement makes you chuckle and you feel yourself relax a little bit: “That’s so sweet of you”.

“And that’s why you love me”, she beams, offering you a false sense of security, “Now, spill!”

“The last time we talked about he who should not be named was over a month ago!”, Yunghee pries, “Something must have happened since then”.

“And you know”, Jiyun interjects as she places her cappuccino back on the table, “I can tell when it’s guy trouble”.

You all look at her with raised eyebrows.  You know where this is heading.

“I mean”, she continues as she slouches her shoulders in defeat and raises her left hand, “Do you see a ring yet?  I sure don’t”.

Eunseo lets out a long sigh before attempting to calm down her friend: “I’m certain he will propose when he’s ready”.

“That’s easy for you to say”, Jiyun defensively asserts whilst pointing her fork in Eunseo’s direction, “You met Yuhan a year after you introduced me to Woonha, and you've already been married for two years!”

Not knowing what to say, Eunseo takes a sip of her chai tea and looks around the table for help.

“At least you’ve got a man”, her blonde saviour retorts through a mouthful of cinnamon toast, “Now, let’s focus on us poor single girls”.

“Here, here”, Yunghee delights, the wicked glimmer appearing in her eyes again as she looks at you, “Spill”.

Taking a deep breath you accept that there’s no way for you to escape this situation.

“We kissed”.

Suddenly the table of twenty somethings becomes full of high school students again.

“No way!  Where?”

“When?”

“Why didn’t you tell us?”

“How was it?”

You don’t know who to answer first: “It was only a couple of days after we last talked about he who should not be named.  He kissed me goodnight after walking me home”.

Everyone lets the new information sink in for a second.

“Why didn’t you tell us sooner?”, Serah queries whilst evidently trying to hide the small gouge in her heart.

Feeling like the worlds’ worst friend, you decide to lay your heart on your sleeve and confide in them.  They are your home away from home after all.

“Honestly”, you breathe as you try to make sense of all the words flying around your head, “I didn’t want to tell you guys about it because I didn’t want to get my own hopes up”.

“What do you mean?”, Jiyun asks as she coats her scrambled egg with pepper, “Is he still being Mr ‘Play It Cool’?”

You nod in agreement, “He goes from being super hot to being the arctic in less than twenty-four hours”.

Yunghee thinks about your statement for a moment before calling you out: “Does this mean that nothing has happened since then?”

“Ding ding ding, we have a winner”, you reply in bitter contempt before picking up a piece of avocado and popping it in your mouth.  You’re not even really that hungry anymore.

Silence falls around the table and you swear you can hear their jaws hit the floor in disbelief.

“Chincha?”, Serah quietly affirms, her fork still frozen in mid air.

“Well, he surprised me with an alpaca plush and a bunch of roses this morning”, you recall, “But no, nothing else like that has happened since then”.

Jiyun goes deep into thought as if assessing the situation: “What temperature was he this morning?”

“I’d say tepid?”, you consider whilst tapping your cupids bow with your index finger, “Maybe slightly warmer than tepid?”

“Any physical contact?”, Yunghee asks, making you feel like you’ve all returned to being fifteen again.

You shake your head.

“Not even a hug?”

“Not even a hug”.

They look at you gone out, and you can tell what they’re all thinking.  You busy yourself by stirring the remains of you rose latte rather than making eye contact.

“So….”, Eunseo demands your attention again as she rests back in her chair and wiggles her eyebrows at you, “How was it?” 

“EUNSEO!”, the others protest, apparently all shocked by her lack of tact.

“What?”, she innocently beams before picking up her fork and waving a chunk of pancake through the air, “I have to live vicariously through Jae, remember”.