Song Recommendation: I Will Go To You LIke The First Snow - Ailee

Seokjin. 

Ever since that night Jungkook hasn't looked my way. Have I done something to hurt him or make him upset in any way? Yoongi assured me that I did nothing and Jungkook was just going through puberty, which honestly doesn't make much sense since he's basically an adult now. Also for the fact that the only person he seems to be avoiding was me. 

I've replayed the events that took place in the bathroom over and over again, I don't understand what happened. I don't know why he left all of a sudden. Sometimes I wish I could read minds, so I knew exactly how the other person was feeling and I could help them. I can't seem to do anything right I guess. It's terrible that fate wasn't on my side.

At first dancing was something I couldn't seem to do well and I always fell behind the rest, constantly making mistakes. Then it was singing, compared Taehyung's husky voice, Jimin's amazing high notes and Jungkook's beautiful warm notes, mine seemed just average, barely average singing next to them. Despite being a singer in the group, the rappers sounded much better then I did, which probably explained why my lines kept declining. Recently it was my looks, I knew my average looks weren't anything compared to the rest, I didn't have natural bronzed skin like Taehyung, defined muscles like Jimin, a blinding smile like Hoseok, cute dimples like Namjoon, crescent shaped eyes like Yoongi and I don't even know where to begin with Jungkook. From being named the visual in the group to only appearing a few mere seconds in our music videos wasn't dong my confidence any justice. I wasn't complaining, I knew everyone deserved it just as much and I wouldn't want it any other way. I want what's best for Army, and unfortunately it just happens to not be me.

Cooking seemed to be the one thing that I was good at, and I took pride in it. I made sure that all of the Bangtan members had a home cooked meal once in a while, everyone missed their families and their brothers and sisters, so i was glad that I could put smiles on their faces every once in a while, it was the least I could do since I constantly weighed them down.

Jungkook was the one who always worried me the most, he was the youngest of us. He was only a child when I first met him, and my heart melted at his bunny like smile. He was so innocent, he still is, I pray for anyone who sees him without his make up on because he looks so innocent like a child. At times I feel bad for stealing his childhood away from him, stuck in a dorm of boys for years, practicing, singing, dancing and constantly worrying about appearances, I don't know how