Song Recommendation: Breathe - Park Hyo Shin

Jungkook. 

It's been a couple of weeks since I've talked to Seokjin properly, only talking to him in times when I had no choice, or during interviews to make sure no one catches on. It's also been a couple weeks since I've touched him properly, except for photo shoots when I'm directed to place my hand on him or around him. Every time I made contact which his skin my hand was left burning, like I had just stuck it in the oven. 

At first Seokjin had tried to talk to me or make conversation with me, but I avoided him. I just told him I was busy or I had to do something and he didn't question it, letting me go do whatever it was that I had to do. I knew I hurt him every time I walked out of a room when he entered, I hurt myself too. It was hard being in the same room as him without guilt about hurting him constantly breaking my heart.

I know everyone noticed the sudden tension between the both of us, but none of them had the balls besides Yoongi and Namjoon to confront us about the whole issue. Namjoon personally came to me a couple of days after we had come back from MAMA. I shrugged it off as I still wasn't feeling well, he bought it and didn't press matters any further. 

Over the past couple of weeks it had felt like life had lost a little bit of its light. Performing wasn't as fun anymore, singing wasn't fun anymore and honestly food didn't feel like it tasted the same anymore. All I felt like doing was sleeping with the curtains closed and never getting up. At one point, I didn't come out for a whole two days, even for food. 

At one point Namjoon and Yoongi both took a foot and dragged me out to the kitchen to feed me. When they had opened the fridge, there were multiple containers with my name written on them in black vivid, all of them filled with my favorite foods. There was only person in the dorm who knew how to cook them and only one person in the dorms possessed that particular style of writing, Seokjin. I cried when I ate it, it felt like home, it felt like I belonged somewhere and for the first time in a while I felt warm instead of cold.

Namjoon and Yoongi watching my every move, not questioning my tears. If Namjoon hadn't figured it out already he probably did when I burst into tears like a newborn after eating Seokjin's cooking. None of the members really pressed on my behavior, I guess it was thanks to Yoongi and Namjoon, but I knew I was being a brat and making them worried.

Some nights I would lay awake in bed driven by lust and desire to go see Seokjin. Nights like those I wouldn't be able to sleep, but thankfully I stumbled across Namjoon's not so secret stash of alcohol. The nights when he was staying late in the studio with Yoongi were the nights I got to drown myself in bitter vodka and strong soju. 

Namjoon had figured out that I was the culprit of the slowly emptying bottles and decided to ban alcohol from the dorm. He had a talk with me that night. 

"Jungkook what are you doing." It wasn't a question, it felt more like a statement. 

"Nothing Hyung." He sighed at my response and came over to sit down beside me on the bed and placed a hand on my shoulder, giving it a tight squeeze. 

"Jungkook, it's obvious that you're going through someth