One day before Christmas, 2008

Seoul Hospital

“Miss Im, Dr. Kim will see you soon.”

“Dr. Kim? Where is Dr. Lee? He should be the one....”

“Dr. Lee is moving to Busan, Miss. Yesterday was his last day here.”

“Busan?”

Yoona stunned. She could not believe that Donghae was leaving without letting her now. Especially after what they shared few days ago, when she finally gave up to her infatuation of the nice and caring young doctor.

They went for dinner as ‘friends’ but different with the other dinner, Donghae brought her to a restaurant on the rooftop of a famous hotel. Yoona was astounded when she knew where he brought her to; a place that she thought was too fancy and expensive. But Donghae was only laughing and told her that she should not worry about it since he was going into promotion soon. That was the day of his half year of knowing her anyway, something that worth for celebration.

She remembered how her cheeks were suddenly burned with shyness of his cheesy remark, but yet she found it adorable and sad too, because that reminded her of Jonghyun.

They openly discussed about their respective past and dreams that night. He told her about his childhood and the hardships it went with. She brushed her eyes out when he told her about his father as she could see the amount of love and respect he had for his father who passed away just days before his graduation. Then he was clutching his hand over her when she told him about the day they lost Jonghyun, provided her with warmth and comfort.

After the dinner he took her to the alley beside the bridge at Han River. “You’ll love the colorful lights, they always bring a heartfelt feeling”, he told her when he took her hand to guide her to the spot where, he said, “my Appa’s favorite spot”.

She blinked several times when she recalled that minute, when suddenly he pulled her closer and whispered softly, “Appa was wrong, there is one thing that more beautiful than those lights.” She was so enchanted by his eyes and his smile that she did not aware that his lips was only inches from hers. “What?”  Then he closed the gap between them by pressing his lips softly over her, “You.” And he kissed her.

Her heart was still beating hard when she remembered the feel of his lips that night. It was soft kiss but firm, as if he tried to express all of his feelings toward her. They kissed once again and that second time she was the one who initiated.

Yet no words were exchanged after that, just simple but very wide smiles that accentuated both of their face when he pulled her close while looking at the dancing lights of the city of Seoul.

And a silent pray to God and Jonghyun, asked them to give her signs if Donghae was really the one that she’s been waiting to swipe her on her feet and took her to fly once again.

She woke up this morning with smile in her face. She decided to ask Donghae if he wanted to spend Christmas Eve with her and her friends on a small private party on the backyard of Hyukjae’s apartment building, the one that was facing the same dancing lights. She even giggled when she realize that she might not need to do so since Hyukjae was his cousin anyway.

She wanted that to be a surprise so she did not bother to call him before Kyuhyun dropped her on the hospital for her routine check-up. When she found out that he was no longer work at the hospital.

He surely would tell her what his plan was and where he went to after the kiss, right?

Something was not right with all of these, but she still could not figure out what. She called Donghae but all that she got was a message that his number was no longer active.

Then one thing flashed on her mind and she suddenly understood what was transpired there, and she felt cold.

They knew it. Her parents found out about them.

Frantic, she punched another number that closed to her heart.

“Oppa, I am sorry, but can you pick me up? I need you.”

Then she sobbed, the first time after she watched Jonghyun’s casket being buried with some of her heart.

*****

In front of the Library

“Joo, I have something important to do, can we postpone our session today?”

Joohyun frowned when she heard a worried voice of Kyuhyun on the caller’s end. They supposed to meet again on the same table, their table, to discuss about the play that she would be auditioning next week.

When he brought her home last night and walked her to her apartment’s door as always (“I need to see you safely close the door.”), he offered himself as her ‘tutor’ to help her understand better about the characters of the beauty and the beast so she could do her best interpretation of Belle. She was so happy when he told her that so she unconsciously kissed his cheek as a thank you gesture.

He was astounded, for sure, but his smile was never that bright when he looked back at her, and did something that she was not expected.  

He pulled her to a tight hug and then he kissed her forehead.

She was stunned and stayed still in his arms for some minutes until he suddenly groaned and stepped back so he could catch her eyes. “I see you tomorrow?” was his only remark. “I will be there at the usual time, Oppa.”

She was still smiling like a crazy girl when her phone ringing and his name flashed on the ID’s.

“Of course, Oppa, take your time. I’ll see you at the party?”

She tried to be an understanding dongsaeng, although her heart was strangely beating fast as if it recognized that something unusual was occurred on that very moment.

“Great.” He sounded relieved. “I’ll call again when I ready to fetch you.” Then he chuckled.

“What, Oppa?” She asked him when she heard that.

“Promise me that you will not try to strangle those boys who always dominated the ladder again, ok?” His tone was suddenly filled with laughter.

She blushed when she remembered that one hostile scene that he witnessed a few days ago, when she was losing her mind after a group of boys, the same boys that had made her waiting for hours on the day she first encountered Kyuhyun in the library, dominated again the ladder.

Actually, she was pledging to them politely to let her took turns on the ladder,  but those boys were only laughing and in return were trying to flirt with her instead. That act was boiling her to the point that her usual calm and wise self was hiding behind her other trait that came only when she lost her patient. She marched to the ladder and shook it with all her strength so the boy who was standing in it fell down with a thump. Then the rest of the boys were only able to look at her in awe when she glared at them. That would stayed for a little while if she was not being pulled aside by a familiar hand, she threw a glance to her side and met the glinted pair of eyes of Kyuhyun who was clearly trying to suppress his laugh.

“Oppa! I told you not to remind me on that!”

He chuckled again. “I can’t help it, you were so cute.” Then he whispered softly, “I’ll see you soon.”

She frowned again when he suddenly cut the connection. She could not understand why when she felt disappointed when he did not tell her what had been bothered his mind.

Keep dreaming, he only saw you as another dongsaeng.

*beep beep*

Her phone beeped again.

“Hyunnie? Where are you? Do you want to come with us to shop some groceries for the party?”

She smiled softly, Changmin was never failed to make her do that, even when she felt so guilty of keeping her tutorial session as kind of a secret to him. She was worried that he would criticize her for seeing someone else’s boyfriend that often. He was the other person beside his cousin and her family whose opinion was meant a lot for her.

“At the library, Oppa. I need to get some books for my audition. Then I have to go to the artist on the alley beside the river to take Yuri-Unnie’s portrait.”

She could hear him smiled, “Okay. I’ll meet you at the artist in about half an hour or so? Don’t say no, please, you know how is Youngie when she is shopping, and Wookie is basically giving in anything she wants.”

She laughed when she heard the whiny tone that always reflected in his voice when he complained about how he should be the third party when the three of them went out together. She remembered Kyuhyun told her that it was only a fair share as he used to be that third party when the trio was him, Changmin and Sooyoung.

Then suddenly she stopped her laugh. Wasn’t that what she was now? A third party between Kyuhyun and Yoona? But Yoona was with Donghae too, right?

“Hyun?” Changmin sounded worried when she suddenly got silent.

“Uh, sorry, I just remembered something that I need to do at the campus.”

“Do you need me to fetch you there?”

She shook her head, “No worries, Oppa. I can do that by myself. See you in half an hour? You know where the artist is, right?”

“Yeah, I do. I accompanied you when you dropped the order, remember?”

She slapped her head for being so forgetful. “Uh, yeah, that’s right. I see you later, Oppa!”

*****

At the market

“Yeah, I do. I accompanied you when you dropped the order, remember?”

Changmin frowned when Joohyun seemed to forget that he was the one that came with her to the artist when they ordered the portrait which would be Joohyun’s Christmas gift to her unnie.

“Uh, yeah, that’s right. I see you later, Oppa!”

And she closed the connection. Just like that. Made him wondered if she had something bothered her at the very moment. He wished she told him what, he had been trying his best to learn about her more, but she always able to hide things from him.

Just like the library thingy. He knew Kyuhyun liked to spend time at the library, and his gut told him about something fishy with that. But as always, his loyalty to  his cousin, his almost twin if not because of their different characters, brush