No. 13
Bleeding HeartsMina had practically run out of his apartment. She ignored the fact that her heart was racing, that her excuses were entirely see through, and the smile on Baekhyun’s face. He made no effort to stop her. Instead he watched her leave with that same smile of his face, the promise that he’d see her later left unsaid. The entire drive home she thought of him. She tried to figure out exactly where she was going with this. Nothing made sense anymore. So when she arrived to the place that barely qualified as home and saw Sehun’s car sitting in the driveway besides hers she could only sit in her car and stare at it.
He was home early again. Why?
She reminded herself that he had done far more than kissed someone, that he had hurt her far worse, but it did little to ease the guilt in her heart. She let out a deep breath and placed her forehead on her steering wheel. She didn’t want to get out of the car, she didn’t want to face him, and she didn’t want to look at him. Not after what had happened with Baekhyun, not after what she was allowing to happen. The first kiss had been purely unintentional, she could not say the same for the second one. Not really. Suddenly she recalled the nights that Sehun had come home, unable to meet her eyes and wondered if he had felt a similar guilt. The similarity caused that ache in her heart to worsen.
She stepped out of her car and went inside. It was quiet as she placed her keys down and looked around. There was a small fragment of hope that she could make it to her room unseen that disappeared as soon as he rounded the corner. He stopped when he saw her and there was a silence that crossed between the two, he broke the silence first.
“I… cooked” Sehun said, “Have you eaten yet?” He asked.
He looked at her, but he wouldn’t meet her eyes. dried up, did he know? No, there was no way he knew of something that had only happened hours ago. She opened to make an excuse about not being hungry when her body betrayed her, the loud rumbling from her stomach echoed around them and she winced as she placed a hand on her stomach and stared at him.
“I’ll get you a plate” He said, his back already to her as he retreated back into the kitchen.
He had cooked dinner. Of course of all days to do anything even remotely considerate, it had to be on the day when she felt the guiltiest. Why? Why was she the one who was always getting the short end of the stick with him? When she had been patient, when she had tried to be kind, he had never responded to her.
She followed him into the kitchen and was momentarily surprised by how good everything smelled. The table had been set and Sehun was serving her plate, but she knew something was wrong. He looked calm but it just seemed fake. He set the plate before her and with a small thanks she waited for him to serve himself after she realized that he was getting another plate ready. He sat across from her and they both began to eat. The food was good, but she could only focus on stealing glances of Sehun. He was solely focused on his bowl, nothing else.
She hesitated before she spoke, gaining courage and bravery that she did not have, “I kissed someone today” She said when she was almost done. Watching as Sehun froze completely, food midway to his mouth.
Mina had to say it. A more noble part of her told her it was because the guilt would’ve bothered her too much, because she was better than Sehun so she wouldn’t hide it. The more petty part whispered that she wanted to see what he’d do. It begged for an answer. So she watched him, breath held as his jaw tensed and he slowly lowered his spoon down.
“I don’t know if I should apologize, I don’t have to, right?” She asked, there was a sad little part of her that shot a glimmer of happiness through her when his left hand balled up into a fist, “I only did it because B—“
“Don’t say it” Sehun said, shooting her a glare, “I don’t want to hear it, whoever it is, I don’t care” He snapped, standing up and taking his bowl to the sink.
How disappointing… she thought as she grabbed her bowl and set it on the sink besides his.
“Well, I’m not going to be like you. I’m not going to sneak around while we both pretend nothing is happening” She said quietly, standing beside him, “Though you don’t believe it, I don’t like to lie. Anyways, thanks for dinner, I’m going to my room”
Mina didn’t wait for him to say a word. Instead she walked upstairs, her back straight and her chin held high. She would not feel guilty for him. She would not be like him. He didn’t even care so it didn’t even matter what she said. All that mattered was that she didn’t feel like she was in the wrong. Not after all Sehun had done. He had started this cruel game of theirs. She had begun to forget, that she could beat him at his own game, by being happy regardless. She could try that she thought to herself.
As she closed her bedroom door though, she realized playing that game did not come without her own pain. The pain at realizing that he truly did not care about her because if he had he would have said something. She changed into a loose tank top and crossed her
Comments