A Markjin fiction
a chaptered fan fic

“Be productive and go out, Nyoung” Jackson said, chewing o the piece of beef jerky he was holding while casually resting his leg over the table. Mark had instructed Yugyeom and Jackson to keep Jinyoung company while he, Bambam and Youngjae are busy with the preparations. And here they were, at Jinyoung and Jaebum’s unit, trying to keep them busy. Jinyoung kicked Jackson’s legs off the table, “tables aren’t for the purpose of resting your legs over it, Jackson” he scolded, he was feeling annoyed at every little details and Jackson had noticed Jinyoung’s off attitude today.

“Calm down” Jackson eyed Jinyoung carefully who was busily cleaning the unit, clearing the windows rather harshly than usual, “Don’t tell me what to do, Wang” Jinyoung grunted, continuously sweeping the already clean window. “Are you alright? Why are you so pissed?” Jackson sat straight, eyebrows knitted together; questioning himself the sole reason Jinyoung was so off today, of all days it had to be today. This won’t be good. “It might be that time of the month” Jaebum came out fresh from the shower, drying his damp hair with a dry towel, leaning against the door frame whilst looking fondly at the people before him. Jinyoung bit the bottom of his lips, muttering an incoherent “shut up”.

“Dude” Yugyeom whispered to Jackson, “This isn’t good” earning Jackson to agree, “It’ll go well, let’s hope for that at least” he whispered back.

Jinyoung dumped the dirty cloth on the kitchen sink then walked to the separate sofa beside Jackson and Yugyeom, “I’m just not in a good mood today” he said, forehead creased as he folded his arms over his chest, “We noticed” Jackson stated. “What exactly happened to you?” Jaebum asked, half sitting himself on the armrest of Jinyoung’s seat as he calmly patted Jinyoung on the shoulder, “You woke up annoyed and you started sighing every ten seconds” he added. Jinyoung deeply sighed, ‘there you go again” Jaebum pointed, “What’s up?” Jinyoung shrugged, looking elsewhere away from the three pair of eyes observing him. Why does this feel all too familiar? “I just... have a lot on my mind” Jinyoung spoke softly, having no mood to talk, even a sentence.

“Why? Is this about –” Jackson instantly bit his tongue, almost slipping the words out of his mouth, aware of Jaebum in the room, he played it cool and faked a cough, “Is this about something?” the glint in Jackson’s eyes signalled Jinyoung that what Jackson was referring to was the exact guy he was currently thinking, Jinyoung heaved a deep sigh, leaning on the sofa as he said, “It’s something...” secretly telling the former that what he guessed or who he guessed was right. Yugyeom looked wearily at Jinyoung then to Jaebum who seemed unbothered at all, instead he softly smiled at Jinyoung, rubbing his had with his, “It’s alright. You’ll be okay” Jaebum said before kissing Jinyoung on the head then made his way to their bedroom.

The three were silent before Jaebum closed the bedroom door, Jackson was the first one to break the ice “You didn’t tell him?” he asked, looking Jinyoung sternly in the eye. Jinyoung slowly shook his head, Yugyeom softly shrieked, “What?! Why?!” “I don’t know. I’m just... scared, how he will react to it. He told me to do what I feel and what if he won’t expect it and he’d be devastated about the fact” Jinyoung softly spoke; he wouldn’t want Jaebum to overhear their conversation.

“What fact?” Jackson asked, forehead creased in confusion while Yugyeom silently observed how messed up Jinyoung is, “What fact, Jinyoung?” Jackson repeated but this time, a little softer, calmer.

“That I still feel something for Mark”

Jackson had to fight a growing grin on his face; Yugyeom faced the other way around as he also can’t contain the smile already plastered on his face. The thing is, all of them knew, even Jaebum knew already about it but Jinyoung was too complicated to figure out himself, a pinch of denial laid in himself for the past months and this time, this time Jinyoung accepted it in his heart and mind and was ready to say it, to his friends, to Mark and maybe to Jaebum. He was aware that it will all be difficult and hard, he still has to figure out what the next step was.

“Jinyoung” Jackson started, finally in composure “We know”.

Heartbeat fastened its pace, hand going cold, eyes staring right to the person in front of him as he was speechless to form a single word, “What?” bewildered, he asked for Jackson’s words again.

“We know” Jackson repeated, “We know you still felt something for Mark, I don’t know what that something is but at least there is something about Mark still inside your heart”

“You no longer have to deny it, hyung. I guess it is better for you to let it all out” Yugyeom added, glad that he was here to witness something so moving and Yugyeom hoped everything will settle in to place just like how he pictured it.

“Okay, that is just not fair. How do you look so good basically in anything and I still have to wear makeup and style my hair, wear something expensive just to look good” Bambam whined as Mark tried putting on his dress shirt, cuffing his wrist and buttoning the shirt up to his chest, exposing his neck to reveal another gold necklace, “I look basic, shut up” Mark barked, dusting his black, fitted pants.

“Hyung, you’re trying to be humble but you probably love the compliments” Bambam snickered before Mark threw his Yeezy footwear towards Bambam’s direction, “Nope! No! You can’t just throw an expensive shoe” Bambam exclaimed, picking up Mark’s shoe and dusted non-existent dusts before placing it beside its other pair, “But to be honest, you look good! Really handsome”

“Thanks, Bam. It’s a special day after all, no matter the outcome is, it’s still a special day as long as I can see Jinyoung in person” Mark softly smiled, looking at himself on the mirror, “Is this okay? Shall I get rid of the denim?” “No, that’s alright, hyung. Denim over stripes, you look so boyfriend”

“You’ve been on Twitter too much, Bam” Mark rolled his eyes, fixing his collar, “Don’t speak twitter language to me” earning a snicker from Bambam.

Mark puffed a breath, feeling the sudden rush of nervousness, “I’m nervous” he said, dabbing the forming sweat on his forehead with his handkerchief, “I’m perspiring”

“Bro!” Bambam exclaimed, “You’ll ruin your hair” s he turned the AC to a cooler temperature, refraining the older from perspiring too much.

As Mark was about to complain and turn the AC to its normal temperature, Youngjae fast walked towards Mark in a bee line from his own separate room “Mark hyung” he called, Mark raised his eyebrows, “What’s up” Youngjae placed his phone inside his pocket jeans before replying “I talked with the management and everything is all set and ready. Closed the rooftop exclusively for you” he grinned, looking at his hyung like he was most excited compare to Mark.

“Well that is good news!” Bambam exclaimed, grabbing the handkerchief from Mark’s hand and slowly dabbing the remaining sweats from Mark’s forehead and nose, “We have nothing to worry” Bambam added. Mark nodded, “But I wonder how Jackson and Yugyeom are doing”. “Hyung, I’m going to text him” Bambam suggested but Mark had another thing in mind, “Let me” Mark said, extending his hand, Bambam handed him his phone and then Mark started typing.

To: Jackson Wang [16:43]
What’s going on in there? Doing fine? – Mark

From: Jackson Wang [16:47]
Mark! Yes, everything is good here. Just waiting for your go signal

To: Jackson Wang [16:48]
Okay.

“Everything is good” Mark exhaled, sitting on the couch to calm himself down as he handed Bambam back his cell phone, “Thanks” Bambam sat right beside him, he faced Mark with an expression he couldn’t grasp but there was hesitation in Bambam’s eyes, he was sure.”Bam, you better spill it out” Mark commanded, Bambam widened his eyes in shock, a chuckle leaving his lips, “That’s what he also said” with a slight smile playing on his lips. Mark tilted his head, “Who?”

“Jinyoung hyung. He also said those exact words but he was talking to Jackson, not me”

“Oh” Mark paused, “Of course, we were similar in some little ways”. He looked back at Bambam who still have the worried expression on his face that made Mark grown more curious, “Okay. Tell me what you’re thinking” Bambam stared at him, closing and opening his mouth, debating to let it out or not but he settled on shaking his head, “There’s nothing” Mark gave him a judging look, crossing his arms over his chest, lifting one eyebrow, he was so done with Bambam’s fake , “Then what is that expression you are wearing?” Bambam puffed a breath, he can never hide anything from Mark, even if it’s far or near, Mark will always know the change in mood of his friends. Bambam slowly constructed his words in his mind, “It’s just...hyung! I don’t want to see you hurt and I know you waited a long time for this to happen. I really don’t want to see you hurting again and maybe the result would be even graver than what you expect it to be. Seeing you hurt, hurts me too and I’ve been feeling this way ever since the moment Jinyoung announced you both had broken up and I was devastated for the both of you. I know what you both were like together, I was there and we were there and ever though I kept saying to ‘get a room’ I was genuinely happy for the both of you, the both of you were at the happiest I have ever seen and hearing the announcement felt like it was April Fools, well, I hoped it was but it happened. And I was sad, devastated as so was Yugyeom and Jackson, especially Jackson”.

Mark slowly nodded, “I know. Jackson called me that day”

“And then suddenly Jinyoung and Jaebum started dating and I though Jinyoung dated Jaebum to fill in the empty hole inside his heart and I still think of it still. And then suddenly the announcement of them getting married and I was more devastated, we waited for you and we expected you like it was bound to happen with you bursting right through the church door and stop it all, it sounds so cliché and maybe so dramatic but we did. And I know that you won’t do something as horrible as that but you loved him and still do and you’re willing to do anything for him, right?”

Mark lifted his eyes, meeting Bambam’s desperate eyes then he slowly nodded, softly saying “Yes”.

“That’s a big risk, hyung. You, are you ready to take the risk? I don’t want to see you hurting again” Bambam was really so worried for his hyung from the start and as much as Mark was looking forward for this day, Bambam felt Mark might break down and thinking about it made his heart churn.

Mark softly smiled at his younger friend’s worried face, scooting closer, he gently hugged Bambam, patting his hand over the younger’s head, “You’ve always been so worried of your hyungs, you don’t need to worry. I know what I’m getting into” releasing the hug, Mark patted his head again, “I know what my chances are and I’m still willing to risk it all and you know why? It’s because I love him”

Bambam snickered, “You’re truly inspiring, hyung. I have to write a novel inspired by your strength and maybe sell it and get rich” Mark playfully smacked Bambam across the head and chuckled, “You are something too, Bam”

“Hyung, you should mentally prepare yourself” Youngjae called, peeping from the kitchen, “It’s almost time” he squealed, excited about what’s going to happen before retreating back to the kitchen.

Mark heaved a deep sigh, leaning himself on the sofa, trying to calm himself down. “We’ll be waiting for you here, hyung” Bambam gave him a reassuring hand over his shoulder, “Okay?” Mark nodded, silently praying to himself that nothing would go wrong. He asked for Bambam’s phone again then texted Jackson.

To: Jackson Wang [17:50]
It’s almost time. - Mark

From: Double B [17:50]
It’s almost time. - Mark

Jackson mentally read then gasped at the content of the message, nudging Yugyeom who was munching on the bag of Lays by the ribs, yelping in pain he whined “What?” clearly annoyed. Jackson quickly handed him the phone to prevent Jinyoung from noticing who was reading by the couch in front of them. Yugyeom softly gasped and eyed Jackson then at the phone once again, he mouthed “Oh ! Showtime!”

“Should we ask Jinyoung out now?” Jackson mouthed
“Shall we?” Yugyeom mouthed back
“I don’t know. Shall we?”
“I don’t know with you, you’re the older one”
“Shut up! It doesn’t matter. Shall we?”

“Jinyoung hyung” Yugyeom called Jinyoung, he lifted his eyes from the book he was reading and raised both eyebrows, “Yes?” “Jackson hyung has something to ask” earning another nudge from Jackson. Jinyoung trailed his eyes towards Jackson, “What?”

“Uhhh” looking elsewhere aside from Jinyoung’s gaze, “I don’t have all day, hyung” Jinyoung said which Jackson grunted in reply, glaring at Yugyeom before replying Jinyoung “Uhh. I- I want to ask you out on a dinner?” As Jackson spoke the words, Jaebum came out of their room and eyes Jackson questioningly “What did I just hear?” “He’s asking me out. Wait, Jackson. Are you secretly in love with me?”

“N-no! No! I didn’t mean that!” Jackson furiously disagreed, shaking his head aggressively and waving his hands in front of him, “That is not what I mean! I just want to have dinner!” he exclaimed.

“And then what?” Jaebum crossed his arms, enjoying the scene in front of him silently. He knew what will happen and he wouldn’t get in the way but seeing Jackson in sheer panic made him enjoy the small opportunity. “And then we’ll talk! We’ll talk, Jaebum. You know I don’t settle for nerds!” Jackson defended himself, earning a flying book, hitting him straight on his temple.

“Hey! I’m not a nerd, you organic-obsessed Johnny Bravo!” Jinyoung retorted, Yugyeom laughing beside Jackson, enjoying the sight before him.

“Only the both of us?” Jinyoung asked, rather curious why Yugyeom and Bambam or even Jaebum wasn’t invited, “It’s exclusive. Just for dinner, c’mon!”

Jinyoung looked at Jaebum for approval which earned him a small nod from Jaebum. “Seriously, you don’t have to ask for Jaebum’s approval. It’s only me, I’m not a stranger” Jackson said.

Jinyoung then stood up and readied himself for dinner. “Dress well! I’m treating you somewhere fancy because I just got my pay check” Jackson called out earning a ‘whatever’ from Jinyoung.

A great timing was when Jinyoung accidentally poured hot water over Mark’s brand new pair of Air Jordan’s, though it wasn’t ideal. A great timing was when Mark and Jinyoung fought for the last banana milk and Mark gave it up for Jinyoung. A great timing was when both were acquaintances with Jaebum and it was fate when they ended up in a small circle of friends in a huge university in Seoul. A great timing plus fate meant there should be a next step and Jinyoung wondered if what people said about the ‘slow motion’ were true, a slow motion exists when you meet the love of your life, Jinyoung waited and waited for his own slow motion to happen or has it already happened from the other person’s side? He waited for his slow motion to happen with Mark but all he saw was Mark waiting for him at the end of the altar, an expensive suit on and all his friends gathered together and a priest at the middle of the altar, smiling at him. He haven’t had that slow motion he asked for not until Jackson left him by the Bay View Restaurant on his own, then the slow motion happened, what he had asked for a decade ago was granted. Mark turned around and Jinyoung knew he was under the slow motion phase, time went still and it barely moved, he barely breathed afraid that everything will move back to its normal pace, hitching his breath, mouth ajar as Mark, very slowly, let out a shy smile and his eyes, glistened in happiness. Jinyoung knew every emotion etched on Mark’s face and he was sure it was happiness he saw in Mark’s eyes.

“Jinyoung” Mark breathed out, everything stopped for Jinyoung. He had forgotten where he was and the reason why he was there, on top of the building, overseeing the bright city below.

Then suddenly, the moment moved on a normal pace, Jinyoung’s eyes panicked, afraid Mark might disappear before him, afraid that this will all be a dream and afraid that it’ll be the first and last slow motion that will happen between him and Mark.

“Jinyoung” Mark called for him again, now in front of him, he didn’t disappear, it wasn’t a dream, “I-It’s not a dream?” Jinyoung breathlessly spoke. Mark smiled, a toothy smile he let out before shaking his head, “This is not a dream” he chuckled.

“Why don’t we eat first?” Mark guided him by the table, hand hovering ever so closely on Jinyoung’s back. Jinyoung wanted to hold Mark and ask a lot of questions. Why did you leave me? Why didn’t you stay? Are you dating someone? Have you ever stopped loving me?

Mark pulled out a chair for Jinyoung to sit and made his way to the other side of the table, in front of Jinyoung. “Are we just going to eat?” Jinyoung asked, staring at Mark who was cutting his steak into pieces already as Jinyoung just sat down, didn’t even dare touch his utensils.

Mark nodded, “Let’s eat first and then we’ll talk” Mark carefully said, he was trying to calm himself down and prevent things to get messy and with him stuttering wouldn’t be a good combination.

Let’s just calm down, Mark. Don’t let your emotions control yourself  he told himself mentally whilst chewing slowly on the medium rare steak he and Youngjae had all planned, including the hanging light bulbs and the empty spaces, all reserved for him and Jinyoung.

Jinyoung glanced right and left, noticing there were no customers around, “There are no people around” he said to himself. “I reserved the place” Mark looked at him and Jinyoung looked at him. And for a minute there, they just locked eyes, barely breathing, moving and speaking. Jinyoung broke the contact first, faking a cough and darting his eyes anywhere away from Mark’s tempting eyes, “the lights are beautiful, too” “Youngjae and I planned for that” “Youngjae...” Jinyoung spoke of his name, a pinch of jealousy growing inside his chest. Mark softly smiled, “Yes, Youngjae”

“How is he?” Jinyoung asked then slowly chewing on the steak, he wasn’t hungry but then there was nothing else to do and he couldn’t just stare at Mark eating.

“He is better than ever. A great co-worker” Mark smiled and Jinyoung felt another jealousy inside his chest, why was he jealous at every mention of Youngjae’s name? And he lost his will to even chew a piece of meat now; he placed the utensils beside the plate and wiped his mouth with a napkin, “I’m not hungry anymore”

Mark mirrored Jinyoung and told the waiter to clean their table, “Are you alright? Did I upset you?” Mark looked at Jinyoung in panic, afraid that Jinyoung might stand up and leave.

Jinyoung angrily exhaled, “I don’t know, Mark. Am I?” he bit his bottom lip, wondering where all his anger had come from but it’s all happening now and  now, he need answers, “Am I? After all these years? Do you think I’m alright?”

“You’re happy, right?” Mark asked, confused with Jinyoung’s sudden change of mood, “You are happy with Jaebum. I know you are” Mark insisted, he insisted because that’s what he knew.

He was shocked, seating right in front of the man he thought he would spend forever with and now the concept of forever without him scared him, scared him that Mark may leave him once again. He won’t let that happen for the second time. He stared at Mark, feeling betrayed from what the latter said, “I am” he confessed “but it’s different”.

“Jinyoung” he started, knowing he won’t be able to talk once Jinyoung will start talking and the only reason why he is here is to talk to the person he is longing to meet again, “I’m here to talk to you. Please just hear me out” mark shut his eyes, exhaling deeply then slowly opened them, meeting Jinyoung’s lost eyes who nodded nonetheless, “I’m always here to listen to you” he softly replied.

“I-I just want to let everything out, for the five years I spent running away not facing the problem that hasn’t met its closure and I’m here to tell you how I feel and the reason why I left” meeting Jinyoung’s gaze once again, he continued, “Years may have gone by, five years, ten years, eighteen years and feeling for you won’t change, Jinyoung. I know what I expressed to you was totally different but please do believe me when I tell you that I do still care for you, I deeply care for you and I know this is wrong. I’ve been talking senses out to myself; believe me so when I say my heart won’t listen. I’ve been waiting for this moment to happen and now, you’re right in front of me and I feel so accomplished because I’ve been thinking about it for five years and I just had the guts to make the move and it happened. Trust me when I say I do still care for you and I don’t care at all if you won’t return that care because I deserve that. I deserve to be hated and despised and I would still be caring for you even from afar, even when you get rid of me” Mark breathed out, eyes looking at Jinyoung’s intently.

“Mark” Jinyoung softly said, afraid his voice might betray him and would come off croaked, “Do you still love me?” tone soft,, yet a pinch of determination and reassurance.

Mark lowered his head, nodding while chewing on his bottom lip “Yes”

“You love me yet you left me. I don’t understand, please let me understand. I can’t move on knowing nothing from your side” Jinyoung begged an explanation from Mark, eyes pleading as he looked at Mark’s eyes, telling him he deserves the truth.

“Believe me when I say I did it for us” hearing Mark’s words made Jinyoung scoff, “For us? Look where it had gotten us now, Mark” voice raised as he stared at Mark in disbelief, “Your decision broke us apart, Mark”

“I was young back then, Jinyoung. I didn’t know what I was doing. I wanted to excel, I wanted to take my father’s position and he was glad about my decision and I spent the rest of my free time imagining how to would look if I finally could take my father’s place and the be with you, live in a better life with the person  love most in the world. I had it all planned out but things weren’t going on my own pace, things were fast and the last thing I knew was they dragged me to the plane for California, leaving everything in Seoul but my documents and my cell phone. And I’m sorry for not explaining it very well to you, I thought it would go the way I wanted it to but suddenly my dad cut all ties, telling ,e you guys were-“

 “A distraction?”

Mark nodded, “I’m sorry” he whispered, lowering his head in shame as his tears were threatening to fall “I tried for how many weeks to convince my dad but he’d just shrug it off. I did try and contact you but I had guards and assistants watching my every move, Dad didn’t want one failure from me”

Jinyoung took a sharp breath out, “That’s too much to take in”, he bitterly chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief once again, “We didn’t even had a proper goodbye or even a breakup”

“I know you had suffered a lot and it’s my entire fault. Jackson, Jaebum, Yugyeom, Youngjae and even Bambam were there with you and that made me feel at ease a little bit, knowing you have them beside you”

“It’s still all so different, Mark. You weren’t there. You know how much I relied on to you, you were everything that I ever wanted and you were my comfort and then like a bubble, you were gone. Everything is just unfair”, tears threatening to fall, quickly wiping his eyes so it wouldn’t fall down his cheeks.

“I’m sorry”

“Mark, no, it’s not easy. My life was normal, finally normal like everything fell in to place like it was peaceful and calm then gifts started coming and coming daily. Everything normal and calm had shattered and then I started questioning myself, who this admirer was, I shook the trough of you because I knew you may had forgotten about me and won’t even have the courage to do the things you, surprisingly, just did”

“I just wanted to make you feel love and appreciated, Nyoung”

“No. You don’t get to call me that! Everything I built, everything I worked hard on might shamble into pieces, and you don’t get to do that to me. You’re not authorised to call me that”

“What? Work hard on what?” Mark asked, confused at where Jinyoung’s conversation had fallen to, “What have you worked hard? Why would it shamble to pieces? I don’t understand”

“I-I. Don’t! I’ve been building this wall, okay?! I refused to love you again. I tried forgetting you, all the thoughts of you, I threw everything, Mark. I threw them away! Those photos, those couple shirts, those sweaters, everything that reminded me of you because I don’t want to think of you, to even remember you because it only gave me pain and even the good memories we had now were painful memories to me”

“No, Nyoung. You can’t love me”

“Don’t call me that! I know! I can’t, I won’t love you but I do! I still do! And I can’t deal with it; I don’t know how to deal with it. I can smell you and your usual smell that hasn’t changed drives me crazy, looking at you drives me insane and I don’t know how to deal with all of them, I already have Jaebum, Mark. I m married and this is bad for our marriage and hell! I haven’t spoken to Jaebum about all of this, the gifts, meeting you”

“You haven’t?”

“Oh my gosh! I am a disappointment! Jaebum must really hate me right now. But I can’t stop what I’m feeling and I’m so confused right now” Jinyoung’s expression was filled with confusion and panic, Mark wanted to talk everything out, insisting Jinyoung that he doesn’t love him, Mark. That it was all the memories he had fallen in love with. “Mark, I do still love you but I don’t know how to deal with this love and this love had never faded and I’m getting out of my mind” Jinyoung whined in sheer confusion, ruffling his hair with his hand.

“I-I need to go now” he scrambled, standing up and walking fast towards the door, afraid Mark might chase after him.

“J-Jinyoung, wait!” Mark also scrambled to stand up, dashing towards Jinyoung and grabbed his arm, spinning him around, “Let’s talk it out. You can’t be in love with me”

“No, Mark! We can’t talk my feeling out. What is exactly your purpose coming here?! Are you purposely stirring my feelings and then leaving after that?!” Jinyoung furiously faced Mark, anger and confusion was never a good combination and those were what Jinyoung was feeling, “’Cause that’s what you’re good at huh? Running away from your problems?”

“J-Jinyoung, no. That’s not what I had intended to do-“

“But you did it anyway! I can’t just come back from the person you broke, Mark. I was broken and Jaebum was there for me. He made me feel better and look forward for another day, well, that was after I locked myself inside my room an starve myself, trying to reassure myself that you would come back but you never did”

“I know I made some wrong decisions before and I can’t change them back and that’s why I’m here”

“Here what? To confuse me? To elope with me? Steal me from Jaebum?!” voice become louder as Jinyoung stared at Mark right in the eye.

“N-no. Jinyoung, I would never do that to Jaebum, to you. I won’t” Mark shook his head, saving himself from Jinyoung’s questions, alert as he denied, never wanting to stir something between the married couple.

A glint of disappointment in Jinyoung’s eyes but was fast enough that Mark thought he was just seeing things, “Jinyoung, I won’t do that” he spoke softly, walking closer to the raven haired boy in front of him, “I love you but I won’t, I can’t do that”

Another glint in his eyes but it was no longer disappointment but rather dangerous and Mark noticed those glint in Jinyoung’s eyes, “You love me?” Jinyoung softly asked, the tone in his voice was strong

“Jinyoung, don’t”

“You love me. You love me, right?” Jinyoung spoke louder and strong, “You’d do anything for me, right?”

“Jinyoung please, don’t do this”

“You’d do anything for me? Mark” he repeated, Mark defeated, stared at him in the eyes then nodded, “Jinyoung, I do but-“

“Then kiss me” Jinyoung commanded, knowing Mark had no other choice because he knew him and Mark knew Jinyoung wouldn’t stop, “Jinyoung, I can’t”

“I love you, Mark and I would do anything for you and I’m asking you just one last favour ‘cause we know what is right and this isn’t. The only thing right and good about this is our undying love for each other and I love you and I never stopped loving you because I knew from the very first time I laid my eyes on you that we were meant to be together and we were destined for each other, fated to be together but the timing was just off and I would’ve flown to California then everything would’ve been different. I love you and I’m dying inside because you’re right in front of me yet I can’t touch nor hold you. And you feel the same way”

Mark’s breath hitched and at that moment Jinyoung had another slow motion for the second time at that night, Mark walking towards him, slowly resting his hand at the back of his head and the other hand settled on his cheek, he experienced another slow motion and now Mark was looking at him dearly in the eyes, then to his face and finally, pair of eyes landing on his pillow lips and what happened next felt like an explosion of emotions and the highness of need, needing each other’s touch.

Mark crashed his lips on Jinyoung’s, apologizing to Jaebum mentally before feeling Jinyoung’s lips on his own, feeling Jinyoung’s arms both wrapping his neck as he slid his other hand on the back of Jinyoung’s hips. Grunting and sighing as Jinyoung aggressively nipped on Mark’s bottom lip before exploring his tongue inside Mark’s cavern, Mark sighed at the feeling as Jinyoung pulled Mark even closer, leaving no space between them, chest to chest, nose to cheek. Mark Jinyoung’s bottom lip which had earned a satisfying sigh from the latter before Mark bit it by his sharp canine teeth earning another gasp from Jinyoung, “I love you, Mark. I love you, I love you” Jinyoung whispered again and again in between kisses, “Me too. I love you, Jinyoungie” And as Mark spoke those words, Jinyoung couldn’t help but tear up, closing his eyes tight as tears fell down on his cheeks a he rested his forehead on Mark’s, breaking the kiss and leaving them breathless.

“Please don’t cry” Mark softly spoke, wiping the tears away from Jinyoung’s cheek, repeating those words again, “Please don’t cry, Jinyoungie. It doesn’t look good on you”

Jinyoung bust to tears again as he heard his favourite words spoken from Mark’s lips, “I miss hearing you call me that” he softly spoke, tears still cascading down his cheeks, “I miss how you speak my name”

Mark chuckled, “Jinyoungie? That one?” Jinyoung nodded his head, closing his eyes, trying to calm himself down. Mark chuckled then again, “You’re still a baby. You never did change” Jinyoung leaned his head back, looking at Mark with his red, wet eyes and pouted, earning another chuckle from Mark, “I never did change. The only person who has changed here is you and your disgusting hair”

Mark grinned, teeth showing as he combed his blonde locks with his fingers, “People get crazy over this hair, excuse me” Jinyoung rolled his eyes, scoffing “Guess they are blind. Your hair is ugly and dead” Mark widened his eyes, feeling offended then slowly forming his lips to a smirk, “But you love me. Explained pretty well from that kiss”

“You kissed me first”

“You asked for it”

Jinyoung’s grin faltered, remembering what situation they were in, Mark sensing it, sighed, stepping back a little as he buried his hand inside his pocket, chewing on his bottom lip as he eyed Jinyoung, “We can’t do this”

“I know” Jinyoung softly spoke, “But that doesn’t mean I no longer love you, Mark” sad eyes, staring back at Mark as he felt his eyes starting to tear up again.

“I love you and I’m sorry I was too late”

Mark went back to his condo late and as expected, the boys were there waiting for Mark to arrive home even if it was already past midnight. Everyone scrambled and dashed towards Mark.

“How was it?” “What happened? “You look like a mess!” “Oh my gosh hyung” “Did Jinyoung cry?”

“It was fine guys. Probably what you had imagined” Mark sighed, flopping himself on the sofa then tossing his shoes somewhere as he stretched himself, feeling the tension in his muscles.

“Wait! There was a make up ?!” Jackson exclaimed which earned a slap from Mark across the head, “No stupid. There was nothing like that”

“Then what exactly happened?” Yugyeom asked, followed by another question from Bambam, “You cried, right?

Mark nodded, “I cried a little. Yeah, of course. I explained everything from start to present. I told him I love him, still love him and then of course we knew it won’t work out, it’s all my fault but it’s okay for ma as long as he is happy and then we got ice cream after, talked, catching up. We basically are in good terms now and then I drove him home”

“So, there will no longer be awkward patches? Between you and him? How about Jaebum?” Youngjae asked. Youngjae and Mark knew what happened between him and Jaebum, they were already good but for the benefit of the entertainment, Mark answered, “I’m working on it” earning understanding nods from the rest of the boys.

“Did something happen other than talking? Did he slap you?” Jackson asked, Mark took long to answer as he was debating to answer it or not, he took a deep breath then answered in a calm tone.

“We kissed”

“WHAT?!”

Jinyoung came home, ready to hit the shower but suddenly remembered he still had another thing to do and that was to talk to Jaebum about Mark, of course he won’t mention the other part regarding about the kiss.

“Jaebum?” he called for him, “Here” Jaebum replied, coming from the kitchen, making himself coffee, and back facing Jinyoung.

“Listen, I have something to tell you” Jinyoung cautiously said, Jaebum took a sip of the coffee on his hand and faced Jinyoung, leaning his back on the kitchen counter.

“Shoot” Jaebum said, before replying, Jinyoung took a deep breath ‘It’s now or never’ he mentally told himself then said, “I met Mark and we talked and I’m really sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, seriously sorry. I was afraid”

It took long for Jaebum to actually mutter a reply while Jinyoung stood in front of him, Kitchen Island separating the both of them, “I see” was the only words muttered from Jaebum as he placed the coffee mug on the kitchen sink then made a bee line to their room.

Jinyoung bit him bottom lip in panic, he knew Jaebum won’t take this lightly. He chased for him towards their bedroom, trying to explain himself and defended Mark, “Let me explain, Jaebum please. Don’t get mad at him, blame it on me. It’s all on me”

a/n: sorry for publishing it late and please dont kill me. but you can hit me up on askfm and twitter and maybe kill me there? haha i had struggles about the flow of the story and i personally wanted this to be written so well like because this is the of the story and i want yall to be satisfied with the way i write and maybe its outcome for the story? haha please tell me what you all think and guess there will be a few more chapters till i finish this fic cause im going to focus more on the markjin fic fest omg if you want to join hit me up for details.