A Markjin fiction
a chaptered fan fic
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He gulped before reading the neglected letter between his fingers, it was written on a messy, manly handwriting and Jinyoung could not deny that it was Mark’s penmanship, he is positively sure of it. Slowly reading the letter, it says:

Contact this number 408-094-223 if you are ready.

An hour had passed and Jinyoung still couldn’t grasp reality, was this really Mark? Mark, his first love? Or was his eyes playing tricks on him? Mark didn’t seem like he wanted him back but a part of him wanted to make sure of everything and what more than to actually contact the given number and meet him, his secret admirer face to face.

Jinyoung was still rooted on his place, never even bothering to move because he was afraid that if he does move it’ll all disappear and realize it was all just dream, so he stayed rooted on his place, letter still in between his fingers and the necklace still resting inside the box over his shaking palm. He raggedly breathed, exhale then inhale and so on, slowly swallowing on his saliva, he then slowly moved, closing the velvet box after placing the letter inside. He shut his eye, releasing another ragged breath before slowly walking to their bedroom. He is mentally drained and still has to figure out what lie to make up when the boys would ask, and Jaebum, oh my god, Jaebum, how will he react to this? He knows he had to be honest to his husband, that he doesn’t have to hide it from him but again, he was afraid, “I’ll just deal with this tomorrow” Jinyoung muttered to himself before covering himself with a blanket, ready to drift off without thinking to change to a more sleep suitable wear.

The next day, Jinyoung woke up with a hissing sounds coming from the kitchen, it was probably Jaebum making breakfast for them since he woke up later than he actually does. He made his way to the shower room to rinse off the unwanted feeling he had yesterday.. yesterday. Jinyoung gasped, remembering the events that happened last night, how will he ever deal with it, then Yugyeom’s words played in his head “Just remember to think twice and think it overtime before making a decision” and that’s what Jinyoung will do, he will think about it really hard and well.

“Good morning, babe” Jaebum greeted him, settling their breakfast down their table, “You kind of slept it, that rarely happens”

Jinyoung was left speechless for a second then decided to speak since he wouldn’t want to look and sound strange or weird in front of Jaebum, “I was tired and Jackson took us out for a couple of drinks” he replied, trying to act calm but he was never actually calm ever since he remembered about the present, the letter and Mark. He walked to their table and silently devoured Jaebum’s made breakfast, “So what did you do last night?” Jaebum asked, also devouring his breakfast after asking Jinyoung.

“Work as usual and the boys, nothing new really” Jinyoung avoided looking at Jaebum in the eyes because he might sense his unsettling emotions, so he darted his sight anywhere but Jaebum’s, “How about the meeting? How did it go?” Jinyoung asked, mildly curious how it went.

“The meeting!” Jaebum exclaimed, a grin plastered on his face, “We are having a big project soon. The details weren’t revealed yet but they said it’s a really big one”

“I’m happy for you” Jinyoung’s smile grew, this time looking Jaebum straight in the eye to see how happy he was for his husband, “It’s going to be a good one, trust me” he beamed.

“Now let me eat fast before I get late” Jaebum lifted his utensils before he went back and ate the breakfast, Jinyoung nodded then did the same.

“Umm” Jinyoung sat silently tensed in a café around his block with two boys smiling weirdly and looking rather strange at him, their eyes filled with impatience and excitement, “Stop that” he knitted his bros together feeling like he is slowly swallowed by a black hole.

“We just want to know what was inside” Yugyeom beamed, Mark didn’t tell him what he gave to Jinyoung but knowing it was personal, Yugyeom was a hundred percent curious, “Come on”

Bambam nodded, agreeing with Yugyeom, “What was it? A picture frame? Wait, no, that one is cheap. What was it, hyung? Huh?” Bambam nudged at him several times, trying to let him spill the beans, “Seriously, we won’t stop it until you tell us or… to let us see it” Bambam wiggled his eyebrows.

Jinyoung rolled his eyes, when will he ever have an alone time with just himself, ALL ALONE. He slowly regretted agreeing to meet up with these nosey boys, “I-It’s nothing” He pressed his lips together, debating whether he’d reveal the admirer’s identity or just mention the necklace, they didn’t probably notice Mark’s gold necklace with a cross during the four years of college, Mark’s precious necklace that he dearly treasured, the necklace they tiringly searched for in the woods when Mark lost it during their camping activities. They wouldn’t probably know, right?

“We don’t care, hyung. Just let us see” Yugyeom eagerly asked, earning a defeated sigh from Jinyoung, “Okay. J-Just…” Jinyoung gave up while fishing for the velvet box inside his business bag, “J-Just tell me if this is familiar to you” he said, placing the velvet box over the table before opening it, revealing what’s inside.

Yugyeom tried to compose himself from the shock he felt, “Gold! Can we just sell that if you’re not planning on meeting this admirer?” Bambam teased, Yugyeom knew it, both of them knew it belonged to and they knew how important the necklace was for Mark, his mother gave it to him when he graduated from high school. Yugyeom eyed the shining necklace that made Jinyoung’s anticipating expression evident on his face. “N-no. Not at all. Not familiar” Yugyeom shook his head, denying its familiarity. “That’s one fine necklace. But nope, not very familiar at all” Bambam did the same, deny. Jinyoung sighed in relief, “Really?” he smiled, earning a nod from two boys.

“Now, mind telling us who the admirer is?” Bambam asked, wanting Jinyoung to reveal it himself. Jinyoung fumbled with his fingers under the table, will he? Will he not? He had to make a decision right now.

“It would be better if Jackson is here. I’ll tell you who he- the admirer is when Jackson is around” Jinyoung mentally slapped himself from slipping it from his tongue, Yugyeom and Bambam on the other hand were having a great time of their lives, they have to compose themselves from the wide grin that is itching to crack in about a minute, “What about Jaebum hyung?” Bambam asked.

“I-I’ll talk to him alone” Jinyoung bit his lower lip, he was nervous about where this will end up. He could no longer deny to himself that he has still this lingering feeling for Mark, this longing and empty feeling he has been feeling ever since Mark’s departure. A void inside his chest and he is standing in the middle of nowhere with not knowing what to do.

“How about a hint. Maybe what the admirer is to you. Classmate? Dorm mate? Batch mate?” Yugyeom asked.

“Familiar to us. That is all I can give you guys. Let’s meet another time with Jackson” Jinyoung said, sipping on his iced Americano, “I hope you’re okay if I reveal it to you soon, guys. I don’t want you three to despise me” a sad tone evident in his voice.

“Don’t worry, hyung. That would never happen” Yugyeom replied, “Believe in us” as he threw a thumbs up in front of Jinyoung’s face, “Just worry about whether you want to meet the admirer or not. Just don’t regret it once you make that decision” Bambam warned, he’d rarely be this serious but when he is, he totally is especially when it’s about his loved ones. Jinyoung nodded.

During that night, Yugyeom and Bambam crashed to Jackson’s apartment knowing he’ll be there around that time. They punched in the code to his apartment then settled comfortably on Jackson’s sofa by the living room. Jackson shrieked in fear when he left his bedroom to the living room and seeing two heads on his sofa, those two heads looked at him and beamed, “Hyung! Hey! We have tasty news for you!”

Jackson threw his slippers at them, “You almost killed me!” he squeaked, earning a snicker from the two boys, “Keyword. Almost” Yugyeom laughed before pulling Jackson on the couch, they were itching to tell the news to their hyung.

“What is this news about?” Jackson pouted, still hasn’t recovered from the shock, “It’s about the gift” Bambam chanted, making Jackson’s eye widen and grin at the mention of it, “Then? Then? What happened?” Jackson excitedly bounced on his seat.

“You have no idea how lowkey shocked we were when we saw the present was” Bambam said, “We were so lowkey surprised too and of course we didn’t make it obvious because Jinyoung might sense the betrayal”

“It was so shocking” Yugyeom added and Jackson got himself prepared for the reveal that is about to happen, “S-so what’s inside?” Jackson impatiently asked.

“It’s…” Yugyeom started, “It’s his cross necklace, hyung!” Yugyeom exclaimed as he, himself was surprised again for the second time around.

“Gold? The gold one?” Jackson’s eyes widened in shock causing him to stand up, “Oh my god. That necklace?!” earning a nod from the boys, “Damn, that necklace that almost put us in danger during camping” Jackson flopped back on the sofa, combing his hair from the shock.

“I also remembered that time” Yugyeom said, “Mark must’ve really love Jinyoung to reach that extent when he gives his treasured necklace to Jinyoung hyung” Bambam nodded, “then we should do our part to convince Jinyoung hyung to meet Mark hyung. He has to. Mark’s probably worrying at this hour”

“Knowing Mark, he would kill himself from overthinking and worrying. We should really do our part and convince Jinyoung” Jackson said, “and hyung” Yugyeom remembered about the three of them meeting Jinyoung soon to reveal the admirer’s identity, “Jinyoung’s going to meet with us soon. He’ll reveal the admirer”

“He still hasn’t?” the boys shook their head, “Nope, not yet” Bambam replied, “He’s waiting for you before he announces it” Yugyeom replied, “How about Jaebum?” Bambam shook his head then replied, “He’s going to talk to him alone”

“Wow. I’m worried for Jaebum. He’s also our friend, guys and seeing him react to this would also break my heart. I know this will really affect our friendship but everything is already happening and we can’t back away from it” Jackson loves each of his friends and it’s not easy to see them hurt especially from the situation they are facing currently. If things were to remain as it is, his best friend Mark will remain hurting and alone and if things were to happen and if Jinyoung decided to meet Mark then Jaebum will also get hurt. And Jinyoung will also get hurt from the choices he’ll make and pain is inevitable, it’s only a matter of time for Jinyoung to choose on which end will be left in pain.

“Plus, Jinyoung wasn’t honest about how he felt” Bambam said, “We know how he still loves Mark hyung despite how many years has gone and seeing him a while ago, his expression wasn’t an expression of a man who had already on”, “It’s for the triangle to decide. Jinyoung’s isn’t only one in control of the decisions. Mark and Jaebum could also decide for themselves and the means of their feelings and logic itself” Yugyeom added.

Three men had grown in to a deep conversation about the situation their other friends are tied in, they thought a lot about and made a conclusion that they won’t be meddling between them but to support and give them honest opinions about it and not forcefully make them do things that aren’t comfortable with.

The night after was the night where all four of them had gathered at a Japanese restaurant inside one of the VIP rooms Jinyoung reserved the day before, “Japanese cuisine. Nice taste, hyung” Bambam teased, earning Jinyoung to rolling his eyes, “Just be thankful I’m treating” he replied.

Different dishes were placed before them, before they could talk about what they will be talking afterwards, they still had to eat because we never know what might happen, he doesn’t want one of his friends to lose their appetite, “Let’s eat first” Jinyoung smiled before lifting a piece of sushi then shoving it inside his mouth.

After they were done with their meal, Jackson cleared his throat, “So…” he trailed, “What about this admirer?”

Jinyoung had his palms sweating in a matter of seconds, “Yes. That’s why we are here to talk about that and maybe help me?” he was unsure of his words but nevertheless was met by a nod from the boys.

“You’ll be making the final decision, hyung. We are just here to state our opinions and comments, it’s all up to you in the end” Yugyeom seriously said. This wasn’t a mood for all jokes and teasing after all because with the decision they will make, it will affect the future and they have to be careful about it especially when Jinyoung and Jaebum are lawfully married and it won’t be easy to break it since it was holy and breaking it meant you have to suffer for the consequence, breaking any marriage under the law will also be a hard and difficult process.

“Can I see the present, first?” Jackson asked, Jinyoung fished for it inside his bag then placed it in front of Jackson before revealing the content. Jackson softly gasped, he didn’t want Jinyoung to give him a suspicious look, he stared at it longer then eyed Jinyoung, “Wow” he simply said, he was left speechless from the sight of the gift. Mark really went all in on this and that meant Mark was committed and firm about what he is going to do.

“H-He must be really rich”

Jinyoung looked up at Jackson with a confused-slash-shocked expression, “Why do you think so?” he asked as he kept playing and fumbling with his fingers under the table while cautiously eyeing the three boys in front of him.

“That person literally gave you a 24 carat golden necklace. That would mean something, right?” Jackson said, he want to hear Jinyoung reveal the identity soon and he was looking forward for it.

“Who is it, hyung? Now that we all are here” Bambam said, he could no longer hide his excitement, he too need to look convincing that he’s shocked from the reveal.

“Are you sure this necklace isn’t familiar? Take a closer look” Jinyoung pushed the velvet box further in front of them, wanting them to take a closer look of the item, “You have to know” pleading tone quite evident in his voice. He didn’t want to verbally say the name of the admirer, it makes him anxious just by speaking it.

The three shook their head all at once, “Nope. Who does this belong to?” Yugyeom pointed at the box, a convincing questioned look plastered on his face as he faced his oblivious hyung, “Really? Not even familiar?” Jinyoung pushed the question further, earning another shake from the boys’ head

“Who does it belong to?” Jackson asked, staring right into Jinyoung’s eyes, “Stop hiding around the bush, Jinyoung. Just spill it” Jackson really wanted Jinyoung to say it, say it in front of him and in front of their friends. Bambam and Yugyeom were surprised at Jackson’s eagerness, they expected it to come nonetheless. “Hyung” Bambam pleaded, his eyes showing the emotion he tried to express.

“It’s…” Jinyoung started, three boys leaning closer towards him to clearly hear the words directly from his lips, “It’s…uhh” Jinyoung dragged yet again but the boys leaned further as their ears directed towards Jinyoung’s way, “Mark” he whispered but barely enough for the rest to hear, earning an exaggerated gasp from Jackson but Jinyoung hadn’t noticed since he was busy staring at nothing, “The admirer is Mark” Jinyoung spoke again, in a tone of disbelief because he couldn’t believe everything that happened and if it was even possible.

“It doesn’t make any sense” Jinyoung spoke to himself and Jackson wanted to tell him everything is real and everything makes sense. Jackson lifted the necklace and clearly examining it, “Now that I thought about it, this was totally Mark’s necklace” as he eyed Jinyoung who was left speechless. No, he wasn’t dreaming and yes, everything is real. “Really?” he asked, earning a nod from Jackson.

“What are you going to do now, hyung?” Yugyeom asked, the other were also curious. They want Jinyoung to make a choice, a choice that he wouldn’t regret choosing. Jinyoung shrugged, he was lost as to what to do.

“I thought long and hard about it. And this question will always end up making me wonder”

“What question?”

“What will happen next? What will happen then? If we are to meet” Jinyoung said with a tone of longing and wonder in his voice, he was curious. And he needed to be prepared on what’s going to come, he needed to prepare his heart and his senses. Poor Jaebum, my husband Jaebum who is oblivious of it all.

“Mark hyung may be clumsy but he is smart” Yugyeom said, a face stoic that seemed like he was trying to prove Jinyoung a point, “He wouldn’t ruin you marriage with Jaebum. He isn’t that kind of man, hyung” he continued on as he was looking Jinyoung straight in the eye. Yugyeom was forever loyal to his Mark hyung and Jinyoung understood that, Yugyeom made Jinyoung realized that he was apparently true, Mark would never do that, he isn’t a bad person. But the question is, will Jinyoung waver when he meets Mark, will he be the one to break their marriage off? And that other question scares the out of Jinyoung.

“Then what will he do? When I’m ready to see him?” Jinyoung wondered, staring Yugyeom back like they were having a battle of convincing each other but knowing what kind of person Yugyeom is, Jinyoung would lose this battle, “More or so, you’ll talk. Or he’ll do the talking” Yugyeom replied.

Jinyoung raised his eyebrows because the only thing that Mark is bad at is talking and he couldn’t picture Mark talking the entire time while this time Jinyoung will be doing the listening. Yugyeom who saw right through Jinyoung, spoke, “Mark hyung had changed during the span of five years. I’ve seen it”

Jackson who felt the tension tried to insert his own opinion, “I mean, since he is the one who is calling for you then of course he’d be doing the speaking, right?” earning a quick nod from Bambam.

“Talking? Will it be all? Are you sure?” Jinyoung wanted to call the number and see Mark again, it will just be talking, right? Jinyoung wouldn’t have the voice to talk and he is sure of that. Mark only holds the power on making Park Jinyoung speechless, dumbfounded.

“I know my best friend, Jinyoung. The worst case scenario will probably Mark holding your hand. He know where he stands and once again, he isn’t that dumb” Jackson said, making Jinyoung convinced at his words. Mark respects everyone, that is how and what he is, he wouldn’t go over the line.

“Hyung, you believe us, right? And Mark. There won’t be any monkey business” Bambam finally spoke, his confidence slightly wavered but yes, Jinyoung believed them; they are after all his best friend so, Jinyoung nodded.

“Seems like you really want me to meet Mark. Whose side are you on?” Jinyoung gave them a suspicious look, Jackson quickly shook his head “We just want you to settle things. So there wouldn’t be any awkward patches in our friendship”

“Hyung, just think of this as something for the better. For your both sake and our sake” Bambam said, “It has been five years, hyung. Let’s not drag it for another year”

Jinyoung nodded, “You are right. I should just an up and contact the number… right?” he asked, unsure of the situation he is in. he needs assurance.

The boys nodded, “Just know that you’ll be in control of the decision. We won’t be making the decision for you” Jackson said.

Jinyoung fished for the card in his pocket, he lifted it in between his finger then looked at the impatient boys, “This isn’t his number, right?” Yugyeom shook his head, “Probably his secretary” earning and understanding nod from Jinyoung.

This will mark everything, his decision cannot be undone and he made up his mind. He needed to get this over with fast, a part of him wanted to fix everything with Mark and another part of him is afraid, afraid that he’ll fall for Mark hard this time and wouldn’t be able to stand up back again.

“So… I should just type a message, right?” Jinyoung’s hand was shaking, taking his phone out in his pocket and lifting it on his palm, it felt heavier this time.

“Know what you are deciding” Jackson reminded him, Jinyoung nodded as he began to type the message, “I’ve made up my mind” he said.

To: 408-094-223

 I’m ready to meet you.

“Is this okay?” Jinyoung let them read the message before he could send it, the three boys nodded – they were jumping up and down inside their head because it finally is happening. There will finally be a progress. Jinyoung in his breath before pressing send.

Message sent.

Jinyoung exhaled hard, this is it, and there is no backing down because sending something like “Sorry, wrong send” would determine him as a coward. He wouldn’t want that especially towards Mark. He is finally meeting Mark after five years and if this isn’t nerve wrecking then what is?

1 unread message

Open.

From: Park Jinyoung

I’m ready to meet you.

Youngjae gasped at the message he received, “M-Mark hyung” he called him from the kitchen as he was preparing something for them to eat before he received the message.

Mark replied to him from the living room, he was sitting comfortably on his sofa while sipping a glass of white wine when Youngjae dashed towards the living room, flopping beside him as he shoved the phone right on Mark’s face, “I’m ready to meet you” he read, he gasped and panicked looking at Youngjae who had settled the phone on his lap, “It’s time” Mark nervously smiled. He is finally meeting him, it wasn’t a dream and Youngjae made sure of that. Then they’ll fly off to Seoul tomorrow.

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A/N: I finally get to update after a couple or more months. I am so sorry for the delay guys. My laptop broke and then my phone broke, helpless. Haha. But here you go. I'll probably update every week now. Probably.