"If she were a drink, she'd be a single barrel bourbon on ice. Smooth with a kick, a chill & a burn all at the same time." - Brad paisle

Chapter 1

“Where the hell am i?” Jaejoong cursed when he open his eyes the room had changed,his bedroom become so weird and smelly, where is his comfortable room? He wondered.

Suddenly just like a hammer hits his head with full of power with reality, He realized that he is in fact in his new apartment.

He rubbed his eyes and fixed his bang, his body feels like hell, he moved to this “new” apartment by himself, he had to carry all his stuff alone, arrange the furniture to the way he like and put the food he bought from the nearest market before he collapse in his bed because unbearable exhaustion.

----@@@@--- Jaejoong's POV ----@@@@-----

I kicked my shirt away, I always sleep shirtless,I walk limply to the fridge, the cold morning air makes me tremble , my leg is shaky, i’m damn starving, i open my fridge and shove my head in it, i like the sensation, the cold makes my head calm,ah, food, !, nothing i can’t really eat here, what was in my head when i bought it, i take 2 ramens , yeah, i have to struggle with the need to eat something before my ramen finish to cook, I took the cocholate and shove it in my mouth.

One the ramen cooked, I eat my ramen madly, I even didn’t care about the heat that could burn my tounge. I look at empty bowl in my hands, I regret that I just cook it two. I should make it four.

I look around,my heart is aching, I’m alone now, I left my dad, I decided that I’ll live by myself, I don’t want to have any contact with him anymore, let him lives his own life miserably with his bourbon.

I don’t need to bother my mind anymore about his life style, I don’t need to get into a fight with him everytime he comes back home in drunk condition, I don’t need to ing care about his condition, I am ing tired to try to fix him, I am still to young to get pulled into his black hole.

I hope he will move on, like me, accept the reality. Do I accept about it now myself?  I don't really know the answer but I am sure as hell I didn't destroy myself with that damn liquor.

why in this earth he just had me as his son, why he didn’t love anyone else except my mother? why he couldn’t believe  the truth that he couldn't change the fate. I'm done with all of this,I don’t want to get involve anymore, I’ll start from the beginning with myself, I’m done with him,I don’t wanna know anymore.

I reach at my phone near me, check a message from someone , nothing, of co