“Ok, what on earth is going on? You avoid me at first and now you suddenly appear out of nowhere and actually yell at me?” Myungsoo was basically pissed. He wasn’t exactly envisioning his day to be anything like this. Then again he didn’t plan to see Sungyeol at all. Come to think of it, did this mean he wasn’t exactly avoiding him? This man was seriously going to be the death of him.

“Avoiding you? What? What are you talking about? Why would I be avoiding you for? Look, that’s not even important at this point, you really need to be more careful. If anything, don’t follow complete stranger even if it’s in broad daylight.”

“He said he knew you.” Myungsoo sighs, not even trying to argue. He was simply stating a fact. Plus, Sungyeol should know by now, how curious Myungsoo was on his account. His feelings being one of the many reason he cared enough to know but it wasn’t just that. Before Myungsoo fell in love with the man, they had been friends. At some point, Myungsoo would even say, Sungyeol was the closest to him. So of course, he’ll want to get involve with him. Even if it means being pesky.

“And so you followed him? Didn’t I tell you to not get involved with me?” Sungyeol snapped exasperatedly.

“You know what I think about that. Listen, you don’t want to accept my feelings that’s fine. But don’t try and shut me out. I’m not your enemy.”

“Myung, this isn’t a joke. The people I’m going against aren’t some cuddly bear. They kill. As in taking away your life.”

“So that’s why you can handle them better than I could?” Myungsoo retorts a bit too snarky but Sungyeol hyung didn’t seem to get that Myungsoo hadn’t always been a good guy. Even if it was back in high school, he knows how to deal with people who wanted to do more than hurt him.

“This is not the question.”

“Yes it is. It’s exactly because of that. That’s why you won’t consider me as a potential partner or anyone else for that matter. Because you think you can carry your burden alone. And maybe you can. Heck, you are the strongest person I’ve ever met emotionally but hyung, we’re all made of flesh and blood. We all need someone to lean on. Now that I’m actually in your world like you’ve said, why don’t you try and lean on me? At least, let me help you. It’s the least I could do for what I did to you.”

From the way, Sungyeol tightens his grip on the wheel, and his lips formed a tightly firm line, Myungsoo knew he was edging. Obviously, he didn’t like being cornered. Myungsoo did feel bad for the extra burden but he wanted to help Sungyeol. No ulterior motives this time. Myungsoo just genuinely wants to help the older man.

“Put on your seatbelt.”

“What…?”

“We’re being followed.” Sungyeol curtly explains before he steps onto the speed and changes lane with a sickening motion. Myungsoo was more worried about getting a ticket from the cop than getting in an accident though. So much for sorting out his priorities.

“How do you know that?” Myungsoo manages to ask after buckling up. Sungyeol doesn’t answer immediately, instead, he engages into an empty alley and just pauses there for a few minutes, the gas still spitting fire and his eyes glued to the rear view mirror. Just then two black fancy black cars appear thus, Sungyeol whispers blankly

“Does this answer your question?”

“I guess.” Myungsoo mumbles. His eyes widens briefly however when Sungyeol puts his hand on the doorknob and just when he was about to step out, Myungsoo asks with concern

“Hey, hey, what are you doing? Don’t just get out of the car.”

“If things get nasty, get out of here.”

“No way. Let’s get out of here now and together.”

“They’ve seen my face. So they know I came after you which puts you and everyone you love in danger. Look, I have a plan so you’re going to have to trust me. You wanted to be part of my world right? Well then welcome to hell.”

With that being said, Sungyeol steps out of the car and makes his way toward the first car. It doesn’t take long for the occupant of both cars to walk out. Upfront was the Chinese leader. Sungyeol still didn’t know his real name. But he’ll know soon enough.

“I thought you said you didn’t care about a simple fling. You seem to care quite a lot to have personally come to his rescue.” The man mocks quietly. Sungyeol grins wolfishly at the obvious jab

“Turns out I prefer to keep my possessions to myself. And like you said. He is cute. I’m sorry but I guess I don’t do well with sharing then.”

“What is he really to you for you to take such risks just to save him? You do realize that you've just walked into our trap.”

“Oh wow, seriously? I would’ve never guessed if you didn’t tell me.” Sungyeol sarcastically replies. From the corner of his eyes, he could see the other lackeys slowly surround him but he wasn’t one bit worried. He’s been through far worse.

“Tell you what, let’s make a deal ok?”

“A deal? Do you really think you’re in position to make any right now?”

“Why not? It be fun don’t you think?” The man hesitates for a brief second but eventually he said

“Ok do go on. What is it you can offer us?”

“Whatever you want.”

“Really? Whatever? That’s a pretty bold suggestion.” The man replies a bit flustered yet impressed. Sungyeol equally grins at him and admits still as confidently as before

“Yeah I know. That’s why I expect a lot from you in case I get out of this alive.”

“Really? And what would it?”

“A message. I want you to pass a message for me to your master.”

“That’s all?” The man raises a questioning eyebrow. He looked skeptical to be honest. Sungyeol couldn’t blame him. This type of negotiation were usually more demanding. So the fact that Sungyeol were being so modest even though he had beforehand stated to be expecting a lot from these negotiation should confuse him like hell. Sungyeol couldn’t be happier because of it.

“You know what? We don’t even have to get at hands because of it. Let’s just make it simple. Get me an appointment with your boss.”

Slowly, but surely Sungyeol will get his point across.

“It doesn’t work that way kid. Don’t you see that you are in a predicament right now?”

“So what? I’m offering you a more civil way to get this over with. You must know who I am. All I want is to solve my family’s massacre. Whether you or the company you’re working for is behind it or not, I’ll find out. Even if it costs my life. But just so you know. If I go down, I’m not going down alone.”

“You’re pretty arrogant Lee ssi.”

Sungyeol shrugs.

“So what’s it going to be? Are we going to do this civilly?”

Just then, the men who had been surrounding him from the beginning of the conversation, suddenly began to move thus Sungyeol knew there wasn’t going to be any easy way out of this. Without even looking, he could tell that Myungsoo had just stepped out of the car. He signals him to stay put whatsoever. For his plan to work, Myungsoo had to stay still. The less resentment Myungsoo brings on himself the more focus, the company would be on Sungyeol. Thus, Sungyeol will be able to shift their attention away from Myungsoo. At least long enough for him to find out all he needs to know.

“The hard way we go.” Sungyeol sighs.

In his many years of training, Sungyeol had had the chance to master more than one fighting style. He was more comfortable with using his body rather than weapons whatsoever. Probably because he didn’t quite enjoy the feeling of cutting someone or shooting them. In truth, he didn’t want to take anyone’s life. But there had been some instances where he hadn’t had a choice. That was a part of his life, he promptly tries to bury. Alas, crime such as what he had done in order to survive or defend himself ran too deep for him to simply be able to bury them. But at times like this, those monsters returns. So does the monster inside him he had learn to fear? Every human had a demon inside them. Whether it was in the sense where it wishes to harm someone physically or simply put someone in a long torturous emotional ride, we all have to learn how to tame those pulsions. Sungyeol however had been taught to let it out. Thus every time he lets that part of him go loose, it was basically as if he was numb from everything. No punches hurt him. No cut pained him. He was simply delivering punch after punch like a mad man without any sense of regret.

Sungyeol hated but loved that part of him. He loved it for the simple fact that it made him feel more powerful. The feeling of fear he used to feel every time he thought of losing someone he loved weren’t there anymore. Because he had now the power to protect them. Nonetheless, he similarly hated that part of him. Because at the end of the day, he will see himself for what he really was. Someone that was no different from those that murdered his parents and destroyed his life. Brutes. Despite being a bit roughed on the edge, Sungyeol was the one standing by the end of the confrontation.

“So here’s what’s going to happen now.” Sungyeol begins in a ragged voice, stepping on top of the Chinese man, he later on learn was named Gu Weng Lin

“You’re going to go see your boss and tell him I won’t be taking this so kindly anymore if he attacks my people. Also if he wants me to stop investigating on his company, well, that ain’t going to happen so he’ll have to deal with it. Or he could meet with me. Making it simple for both of us to get what we want. Me answers and him, if he has nothing to do with the Lee massacre, the chance to never hear of me again. Can you tell him that?”

“Go to hell.” Gu Weng spits painfully under Sungyeol’s foot pressure. Sungyeol frustratingly grabs the pocket knife he had intercepted earlier from one of the lackey he fought against, bends over the man’s figure and grazing dangerously the blade near the man’s face, he warns

“I’m already in hell. Listen mate, I’m giving you the chance to get out of this with your tongue intact. Or should I cut off this useless tongue of yours instead?” Sungyeol wasn’t joking. He barely did when he did these type of threat. He was after all a man of word despite what people might think of him.

“You wouldn’t dare.” Pushes the man, exasperating further Sungyeol who was getting more and more impatient by the minute. With a dark strike of emotion crossing the good looking man’s feature, Sungyeol pushes a point at the older man’s throat which gets Gu Weng to open his mouth widely and as Sungyeol grabs firmly onto the other man’s tongue, the blade cutting through a bit of his skin, he finally hears the older man drop the act and plea miserably for stead. Sungyeol doesn’t stop at first. He did however when he finally gets an affirmative respond from his victim. With a small smile, Sungyeol releases his hold from the man

“See. That wasn’t so hard.” Sungyeol told him with a sense of accomplishment. As he watches Gu Weng being tended by his lackey, he throws the blade onto his feet and with a blank tone, he said

“Here, if you come after me, use that. But make sure, you keep your promise. I did spare your tongue after all. Get me a meeting with your boss.”

Sungyeol was going to walk away but he suddenly halts, turns around and adds

“Oh right. By the way, spread the word. No one touches my partner. Or like you like to say, my lover. Should anyone try, he’ll deal with me.” Sungyeol didn’t really look at Myungsoo’s reaction. Honestly, with the blood dripping down his cut from his right eyebrow, his vision was a bit blurred. Thankfully, Myungsoo was the one who was going to drive. In the state he was, he couldn’t do much besides taking a cold shower to cool his used muscles.

When they finally pulled out of the alley and got back on the main road, Sungyeol was having a massive headache. He didn’t let it hinder him whatsoever as he pulled out his phone to check up on Alex. The kid really had to have good news for him. Sungyeol will be in deep if not.

“Hey, can i… Can I ask you something? You weren’t really going to cut off his tongue right?”  Myungsoo asks him out of nowhere. Sungyeol was taken aback. How was he supposed to answer that? He settled for the truth whatsoever.

“Of course not. Would you believe me if I said that?”

Myungsoo doesn’t answer nor does he look into Sungyeol's eyes. They stayed in a long silence like that. Both deep in their thoughts. Myungsoo feeling overwhelmed by the situation and Sungyeol a bit lost to what to do. Neither had any real clue as to what was going to happen from now on.

“Do you know what real pain is?”

Silence. Sungyeol continues

“To not feel anything. To feel completely empty. Ever since that night it's like I’ve been stripped out of all my feelings. Like being paralyzed.To make up for that, i started being angry with everything and everyone. Angry to the world at first, then with my fate and finally with myself, it was like being under water with your hand out on the surface but you can never get that inspiration your lungs need so much. Still, I wanted to feel something. Anything other than this emptiness that grew bigger and bigger. Thus, I accumulated every ill emotions i could think of. Anger was the most obvious and easiest way out of my empty shell. But it came with a price. Everytime i give in to one of my pulsion, i lose a part of me a little more each time. Yet solving my families’ case helps me vent my anger. My methods aren’t always orthodox I admit but it keeps me from going completely insane. Weird but true. That was why I asked you to stay away from me. I’m not the same guy you used to know.”

Oblivious to Myungsoo’s scrutinizing gaze on him, Sungyeol continues in a whisper, his eyes fixed on the view flashing before his eyes

“I don’t even know myself anymore.”