He paced past the door, peeking in every now and again, only to find the two heads engrossed in deep conversation about the intricacies of Newton’s Third Law.

Hoseok ruffled his hair in frustration, as he mentally recited what he was about to say.

Youngmi, you are the most beautiful and amazing person I’ve ever met in my life. I am so thankful that I have met you, and so honoured that you would consider me one of your friends, and I have something to say to you. I’ve loved you since a few months ago, and I know you only recently got out of your relationship with Jungkook, but I want you to know that I really care for you as a man.

The door cracked open as V tumbled out, grinning euphorically.

“Your turn, lover boy,” he chuckled, slapping him on the back.

Hoseok blanched. It was time. He forced himself to walk in slowly, not to go too fast.

She was tidying up her area, putting away her textbooks. She was hooked up to a few IV lines, her skin was pale and the reminders of the bruises that the Minho had put on her were still patched all over her body.

But honest to God, Hoseok thought she was beautiful.

She looked up and then glanced away from him, a telltale sheen of red splaying across her cheeks.

Hoseok found it nostalgic. It seemed just like so many months ago, when he first discovered her real side. When she’d run from him from the nurse’s room, and he had run after her, determined to find out what exactly was up with her.

“Look, if you don’t wanna talk, then I gotta pack up,” she muttered brusquely, eyes dark with liquid emotion.

And now was when he’d finally cornered her, ready to administer some friendship.

“I like you,” he felt his mouth move as the words to his confession flew from his mind. “There’s so many things I like about you. Heck, I can’t even list them all, because there’s a ton. I like the good, the bad, the ugly, the pretty, I just like you. A lot.”

---

“Really?” I could barely hear myself over the fireworks exploding in my brain.

It was weird how I didn’t really feel that the boy liked me until he actually did confess to me.

I could feel the blood rush to my cheeks and my lips upturn into an involuntary smile.

He nodded his head stiffly, flushing like a tomato.

I felt my heart thud slowly as warmth shot through my limbs like fireworks. My stomach was churning, but not in an unpleasant way. It felt warm in my abdomen and my cheeks ached from smiling.

I wanted to kiss him.

Unconsciously, I leaned forward, eyes closing and lips landing somewhat messily onto his as my hands reached up to cup his face. My heart galloped like a racehorse, as my senses became extra heightened. I could acutely feel every single wrinkle in his lips. His familiar piney-woodey smell enveloped my nose, melting me into a puddle of goo. My stomach felt like it was in a warm bath, and the warmth spread to the tips of my fingers and toes as blood rushed to my head, making me a little giddy. 

I tried to communicate all the feelings I had for him into the kiss. Happiness, gratitude, love…

We kissed for perhaps 3 seconds, though it felt like an eternity.

Finally he disconnected from me, his bashful grin and reddened cheeks greeting my opening eyes.

“So that’s a yes?” he asked hopefully.

“No, I kissed you because I hate you,” I rolled my eyes at his ery. “What do you think, smartass?”

He answered me by leaning in, touching our lips together a second time.

This time I smiled.

---

“So… what are we now?” he asked quietly, playing with my splayed fingers.

He seemed almost childlike and hopeful, speaking about the big ‘Us’ word. What were we?

I mean, I’d dated one of his best friends for almost half a year. And we’d broken up for a month now.

Was I ready for a relationship? The raw burning sensation from my breakup with Jungkook had faded, but still… I felt hesitant to go into another one. What if it ended like Jungkook’s and my relationship?

We did part on friendly terms but still… the fact that we parted at all was already a bitter hint that maybe I wasn’t so good at the relationship thing.

“What happened between you and Jungkook is in the past,” he held my face in his hands gently, directing my eyes to his passionate ones. “Let’s start afresh, just the two of us. Don’t let your past hold you back. I’m not letting mine.”

“Your past?” I echoed curiously.

“Nakamori Aya,” he flicked his eyes away. “She was a street dancer from Miguk Secondary School. We met during the infant years, when Namjoon, Yoongi-hyung and I first started out together. I got into a dance battle with her and lost, miserably. And that was how I got my first girlfriend.”

I kept quiet as he went back into history, painting a picture of this Nakamori Aya with his words.

“She was one of the best dancers I’d known,” he spoke. “We used to dance together, all the time. Then suddenly one day, she stopped returning my messages or calls. I tried to get back in touch with her, but one day when she finally did answer, it was a male’s voice, who told me to stop bothering his girlfriend. And that was when I knew we were over.”

I felt myself placing my hand on his comfortingly as he let out a deep choked sigh.

“But now, I want to move forward,” he directed that passionate gaze at me again. “With you. Give us a chance, Youngmi.”

He was right. The fact that he was here already proved his feelings for me, and I knew how I felt about him.

“Okay,” I shot him a small smile, as he relaxed into a big grin.

“Is it too soon to say I love you?” he cocked his head cutely.

I blushed dark red in embarrassment as he chuckled, wrapping his arms around me tightly.

I shyly leaned into his embrace, acutely aware of my thudding heart and the flush in my cheeks.

---

Jungkook paused outside the room, hesitant to go in. He knew Hoseok-hyung would be inside, and part of him felt conflicted about seeing the two of them together, after all that had happened within the three of them.

But the month-long break from the relationship had given him time to heal and thoughts to think. He knew now that Youngmi would be safe in Hoseok-hyung’s hands. And what was more important was that she would be happy, and honestly, all Jungkook wanted was for her to smile.

Even if it wasn’t for him.

It had been painful, excruciating at first. To even think of her would suffocate him. The memories of that small smile she’d reserved just for him, the awe she had when he performed…

But now he’d opened his eyes, and realised the truth. They were not meant to be together, not forever at all.

And he at least owed her her happiness.

He was indebted to both her and Hoseok-hyung. Without the two of them, he wouldn’t have even considered performing again, after all that had happened. He probably wouldn’t even be able to talk to girls at all. Yet here he was, slowly but surely healing. He owed them both his life, and he was eternally grateful.

Time to face the music.

With a resolute knock, he twisted the door knob open.

Hoseok-hyung was lying against Youngmi’s small frame, their hands slightly touching. Their heads were nestled against each other, both the picture of peace with their eyes fluttered closed and their lips perked into small smiles.

Jungkook was surprised by how okay he felt, seeing the two of them together. It felt almost bittersweet, like the juice of sour plums. On one hand, he missed doing things with her that would make her smile, but on the other, he knew she would smile brighter if she was doing those things with Hoseok-hyung.

And he was actually happy for them. It felt a little weird, but when the two of them were happy, he felt a little lighter, a little more cheerful. It made him wonder if he would have been this… content, if they had not broken up.

Likely not.

“Ready to go?” he asked gently, shaking Lee Youngmi out of her slumber.

She blinked sleepily, eyes travelling to Hoseok-hyung, then to Jungkook, then to Hoseok-hyung again, before they widened in horror as she shoved the poor boy off of her body.

Hoseok-hyung tumbled to the ground, knocking his head as he let out a yelp of pain.

“Relax,” Jungkook smiled at her. “I’m okay with it.”

“You sure?” she asked hesitantly as Hoseok-hyung peeled himself off the floor, grumbling under his breath.

“What matters to me is that the both of you are happy. That makes me happy too,” he nodded resolutely. “We’re still friends, right?”

“Of course we are!” she sat up rigidly, looking almost offended. “Why on earth would I want to drop you as a friend? I only have like, 3. Not a lot of option to drop.”

Jungkook let out a humoured chuckle as she relaxed into a grin.

“Hey hyung,” Jungkook greeted. “The chauffeur’s out front, so I’ll just make the payment and we can go.”

Hoseok shot a glare at Youngmi, before shooting him a cheerful smile.

“Thanks, Jungkook,” Hoseok-hyung said gratefully, and Jungkook knew that it was for more than just giving him a ride home.

“No problem,” he smiled wistfully at his loaded words. “Let’s go.”

---

Somehow it seemed a little awkward being sandwiched between both my ex-boyfriend and my new boyfriend, but if they felt any of the tension, they clearly didn’t show it.

The two of them were joking and laughing with each other, trading barbs as we drove down the streets of Seoul, occasionally directing some comments to me, which I answered robotically.

I guess I just had to get used to it.

“Oh, you haven’t been to practice in ages, right?” Jungkook asked.

I nodded. Seeing as I’d been cooped up in the hospital for the past month, I really couldn’t go down to watch.

“I have some great news,” he grinned toothily. “We’re going to hold a mini-showcase in six months’ time.”

I felt my mouth fall open.

“So soon? But what about your condition? Can you take it? Are you sure you’re able to handle so many people at one-”

“Chill, Youngmi,” Superhero-sunbaenim laughed, massaging my tense shoulders. “Ever since you were in the hospital, we’ve been pulling in more and more people to watch. And since we practise almost every day, we’ve managed to increase audience members to more than 30 people! Jungkook’s really making leaps and bounds in improvement.”

“I needed something to take my mind off…” he trailed off awkwardly, “that, so I focused my energy on practice.”

And just like that, the atmosphere had become thick with tension.

“Look, I’m really okay with you two dating,” Jungkook sighed after a while. “Youngmi, I still have some residual feelings for you, but I know you’re going to be really happy with Hoseok-hyung. Hoseok-hyung, I know you’ve loved her since a long time ago, and I’ve already told you that I want you two to date.”

Superhero-sunbaenim and I exchanged glances, but the boy barrelled on.

“And honestly, it makes me happy to see you two together,” he nodded fiercely. “I took a lot of time to sort through my feelings and thoughts, and I realise now that I love both of you, and I want both of you to be happy. When you’re happy, I’m happier. You’re both really important to me. Please don’t think of it as awkward, because even though I treasure my memories with you, Youngmi, I don’t want it to hold you back.”

I felt tears gather in my eyes as I felt a bubble rise in my chest. The fact that Jungkook was being so thoughtful…

“Thanks a lot, Jungkook,” Superhero-sunbaenim’s voice was hoarse with emotion. “I’ll take care of her, don’t worry.”

“I know you will,” Jungkook shot him a grin as I blinked away my emotion.

“Anyway, back to the topic,” he cleared his throat, all businesslike. “We’re going to hold our first showcase in May next year, after Hoseok-hyung’s and Namjoon-hyung’s graduation.”

Speaking of his graduation, the poor boy paled.

“I’m barely passing anything,” he wailed miserably. “My parents don’t even approve of me dancing, and if I screw up the CSATs, they’ll never let me dance!”

“Why are you so worried?” I cocked a devilish smirk. “Your girlfriend is the highest in the level for 4 subjects. And I’ll do whatever it takes to get your parents to approve.”

Superhero-sunbaenim blanched at the look on my face, no doubt imagining the sort of torture I’d put him through to get that score.

“I’m in trouble, aren’t I?” he groaned as Jungkook and I shared a laugh.

---

As the car slowed to a stop, Superhero-sunbaenim got out first, holding the door open for me and offering me a hand.

I rolled my eyes at his “gentlemanliness”. He knew I never really cared for chivalry. I pointedly ignored his hand and his chuckle at my actions as I made my way out of the car.

“I’ll head home first then, Hoseok-hyung,” Jungkook rolled the window down, waving his hand goodbye as the car drove off.

Left alone, I felt kind of… shy?

Memories of his bold confession had me quaking in my boots. I couldn’t believe he liked me to this extent, or that he even liked me at all. He’d seen all my ugly parts, the bully who loved to torment others. He’d seen every part of me, scanned through me like an X-ray… and he still liked me.

And now that I was aware that I liked him too, it seemed to amplify every little thing he did. Every second my hand brushed past him when we were walking up the street to my house tingled with electricity. Every sound he made was amplified like a loudspeaker, from the shuffle of his sneakers to the sound of his breathing.

I felt acutely conscious of his presence, drinking it in, yet wanting more.

I wanted him.

Boldly, I grabbed a hold of his hand, the motion causing blood to rush to my face. He grabbed back just as tightly, our fingers snaking around each other.

I snuck a glance at him, oddly triumphant at how red he was too. At least I wasn’t the only one feeling jittery in this relationship.

“So… girlfriend and boyfriend huh?” he whistled, nose bridge still awash with red.

“Got a problem with it?” I snarked brusquely, trying to hide my shyness with bristles.

“No, just…” he trailed off. “I have to call you things now. Like yeobo. Or jagiya.”

I made a face as he let out a guffaw.

“Yeobo~” he aegyo-ed, causing me to flush in embarrassment.

“Oh my god, shut up,” I groaned, even the tips of my ears flushing red.

“Yeobo yah~” he danced around me, swinging our connected hands together as I let out an unwanted laugh.

“Ah, you smiled,” he teased lightly as I smacked him. “Yah, that’s not how you treat your boyfriend!”

“That’s how I treat mine,” I bared my teeth jokingly. “Want more?”

“I love you,” he blurted out suddenly, causing me to flush red again.

“I love you too,” I muttered, eyes flicking away from him.

The silence was more than comfortable as the two of us walked, connected hands swinging together.

I couldn’t help but feel at peace with this arrangement, yet oddly at war too. I felt the rage of my emotions wash over me as electricity and sweat coated our palms, but I also felt strangely okay with it. Like I was okay with him.

Without him looking, I shot him a small smile, wondering to myself how I’d gotten myself someone who cared for me so much.

Finally, all too soon, we’d reached the front of my house. I winced at the state of it. Even in the dark, it looked almost ominous, with the weeds growing thigh high and the bin overflowing with bottles, again.

It felt weird, like something was wrong, somehow.

I wondered numbly to myself how much the old man had drunk this time, now that I hadn’t been around for him to take his anger out on. Evidently, it’d been a ton, seeing as the bin was filled to the brim with those amber glass bottles I’d grown to despise.

“I’ll walk you in,” Superhero-sunbaenim said definitely. “And maybe bring you up to your room, too.”

Something about the house’s strange aura made me unable to disagree.

As we walked up the front lawn, I couldn’t help but shiver as the wind blew past us, whispering nasty words into my ear.

Superhero-sunbaenim opened the door quietly, making his way in and leading me inside.

I fumbled about for the lights, kicking over even more bottles in my attempt before I finally flicked them on.

I turned around, wanting to thank Superhero-sunbaenim for fetching me home, and let out a blood curdling scream.

My father was lying in a pool of dried vomit, face down in the gunk.

He was not breathing.

---

It was past midnight. The clock was ticking slowly, quietly, ominously.

It was freezing cold in the waiting room, but I had no reaction to it. My mind was jumbled; I had to sort out my thoughts.

1. I was being walked home by Superhero-sunbaenim.
2. We went into the house, because he was afraid my father would do something.
3. We found my father’s body lying down on the floor, not breathing.

I felt a chill run down my back when I realised my father could die. The man I’d lived with my entire life. The one constant who had never abandoned me, dead.

I would have fainted right then and there had it not been for the warm presence of a bigger hand clenched tightly around mine.

I didn’t believe in a God, but I thanked the heavens now that I had him with me. If it hadn’t been for him, both father and daughter would be lying face-flat on the ground, unconscious. He’d been the one to call the ambulance, to do CPR (but without the mouth breaths), to comfort me in the ambulance as we rode back to the very same hospital I had just come from.

The surgeons had gone to work immediately, seeing as it was an emergency case. My father’s face by then had gone pale blue, as they immediately hooked him up to IVs and oxygen and rushed him into the operating theatre, the doors swinging in front of my forlorn self.

I hid a sob as I realised again how close I could come to losing my only family. Superhero-sunbaenim stayed quiet, but his ever-present hand was still clenching tightly to mine, as if reminding me that he was here.

All of a sudden, I felt a warm hug envelop my figure. I looked up in surprise to find Mirae hugging me tightly, whispering consoling words to me.

I collapsed onto her, beyond worry for what was going to happen to my father.

He was my only family left, I couldn’t lose him too! I’d already lost my siblings and my mother, if he went too… I’d be alone.

The truth hit me like a wrecking ball. I slumped into my seat, as that phrase took the breath from my lungs.

“Are you okay?” I heard Jungkook’s voice above me.

I looked up blankly, tears in my eyes as I recognised the rest of BTS surrounding me. It seemed as though they now considered me one of their own.

I shook my head mutely, the tears rolling down my cheeks as the boy gave me a sympathetic look. Normally I would have hated that, but I couldn’t really give a at that point.

And then the doctors came out, pulling off their gloves and their face masks. I stood to my feet shakily as they shot me a glance, as if trying to prepare me for what came next.

“Can we have Mr Lee’s guardian or point of contact please?” they asked, but all I felt was dread.

“Lee Youngmi, daughter,” I started hiccupping as tears continued to fall. “82-6-523-”

“I’m the point of contact,” a new unwelcome voice came from beyond us.

I raised my head and looked to the voice.

Nurse Jeonmi strode confidently towards me as my eyes widened, stomach plunging into the depths of my abdomen. I felt my world grind to a halt.

What did she mean, point of contact?

“Yoo Jeonmi. 82-5-0808-25010,” she stated, walking up to us. “Wife.”

And my world crashed.