"Last year, everything was so different.”

**

Finally stepping on Korea again after two months Ryeowook felt that there was really no place like home. He got the permission to go home earlier than expected in which he didn’t tell anyone to surprise his parents and even Kyuhyun. He survived alone in a foreign country and is quite proud of it. He knows he can live by himself now, anywhere and anytime.

Finishing his mission in Japan, he is now a step closer to his graduation. Just a few exams and recitals and he can be marching his way to his diploma. He can’t wait until one of his dreams finally happens.

 Being in Incheon, Ryeowook decided to stop by his parent’s home first before going back to his dorm in Seoul. The cab arrived in front of their small house. His excited grin can’t be erased on his face as he knows that his parents aren’t expecting him to knock on their door anytime now.

Seconds after he pressed the door bell he was greeted by his mom who was worn-out from doing the work in their backyard.

“Wookie!! You’re here?” his mom said confused to seeing her son at their doorsteps. She hugged him anyway, missing her only son for several weeks.

“Yup. It’s me,” Ryeowook hugged his mom so tight that he can inhale the fresh scent of flowers his mother was taking care of. “I’m finally home,”

“You didn’t tell us you’re coming back! We could have fetched you from the airport,” she said after they pulled apart, both of them now going inside the home. Ryeowook took off his coat and settled it on top of his luggage.

“It’s okay mom. I planned to surprise both of you,” he said taking a seat on their sofa. “Where is dad by the way?”’

“You really did surprise me. Dad is at work. I’m sure he will be so surprised to see you when he comes home later. Are you going to stay or you’ll head back to Seoul?”

“I’ll wait for dad first.”

“Good. Now why don’t you go upstairs and take rest while I cook a delicious meal for us later?”

Ryeowook did what he was told and went to his room which left untouched for weeks. He changed first into comfortable clothes before rolling into his bed. Instantly he fell asleep from exhaustion.

When Ryeowook’s father came home late at night, he knew that he wouldn’t be able to go back to Seoul right away so instead he pushed back the plans for tomorrow. He decided to spend the night with just his parents who missed him so much that they keep on feeding him with stories that he missed. Even if it’s just a short time, he could grasp the difference of living in two different countries even though he only spent two months there.

He missed the familiar feeling of home that Korea gives him. It’s not about the culture but the people that surrounds him. Now he knows that he will stay here after he graduates. After all he knows that his parents will be disappointed if he goes farther than Seoul.

**

Kyuhyun wondered why the time seems to run so slow during class hours. He stares blankly at the professor talking in front of the class. He didn’t bother listening to the old man since he was already confident that he understands the lesson. Advance studying gives him benefit to daydream during class hours.

He thinks of Ryeowook whom he believed was still in Japan right now. He wonders what he is doing at the moment knowing that there is no time difference between them. He misses him badly and all he wants to do is to see Ryeowook. He wants to talk to him about all the unsaid things he can’t directly say on the phone. He knows that the distance is creating a possible conflict between the two of them. If they don’t talk and keep silent about it, he’s afraid it would worsen.

The regular emails they’ve sent to each other over the weeks were a little too friendly-like for him. Or was he imagining things since he was too preoccupied with his research papers? If only Ryeowook was here, he could read the emotions through his eyes and not through the words on the screen.

His thoughts were interrupted when a hand linked to his arm. He turned to his left to see one of his annoying classmates.

“Hey, Kyuhyunnie the professor was gone minutes ago. Let’s go to the library now,”

He looked at her in annoyance. Kyuhyun wondered why he needs to go to the library with her.

She seemed to read his confused expression so she said, “We are going to do the revisions for chapter four, you forgot?”

“Oh… right. You go first, I’ll follow,” Kyuhyun said faking a smile while untangling her hand from his arm. Their groupmates called her and they went to the library without Kyuhyun.

Suddenly Kyuhyun heard someone chuckling beside him. “Kyuhyunnie… tsk tsk tsk,” Minhyun went to stand in front of him crossing his arms. “Seriously?”

“It’s not my fault anymore… she’s too annoying!”

“She doesn’t know what she is doing. She’s a transferee before we all got into the same class,”

“I don’t want details about her. I’m not interested and you know why,” Kyuhyun rolled his eyes as he began to pack his books inside his bag.

“I know but it amazes me how different he was before. I thought he is one of those shy-type girls. Seems like she is a little too friendly with you,”

“You better not tell Ryeowook about this until he is arrives or else he will be distracted there,” Kyuhyun said knowing how Ryeowook can over think sometimes. The last thing he wants was to make him jealous with nonsense people. “I would be the one who tells him not anyone else,”

“Sure you do, but are you two having problems?” his friend noticed the seriousness in Kyuhyun’s voice.

“There’s none…so far as I know,”

Minhyun only stared at Kyuhyun before excusing himself to join his own group mates. He knows his friend wouldn’t do anything stupid to ruin his relationship with Ryeowook.

**

Ryeowook was awakened by his mom early in the morning. He would be taking the bus back to his dorm since he refused his father’s offer to drive him. Driving to and back from Seoul would be tiring so he preferred to have his parents rest at home.

His heart can’t contain the nervousness of seeing Kyuhyun again so he planned to go as early as he can so he can settle down first in his own room before going out to search for his beloved. Actually he didn’t email the other last night when he read Kyuhyun’s before he fell asleep. It would be a pure surprise for him.

So when he finally arrived to his dorm, he walked in nervousness towards his door while taking glances at the next door. He wondered if Kyuhyun was inside, but knowing his crazy schedule he probably was at class right now.

Ryeowook entered his quiet room and immediately figured out that Kyuhyun was frequently here due to the law books stacked on his table. In fact, he didn’t know that Kyuhyun had spent most of the nights sleeping on his bed.

He quickly arranged his stuffs and put the clothes in his luggage to the cabinet. He then went to make something for Kyuhyun to eat when he arrives from school. He must be living with take-out and instant foods while Ryeowook was gone. He wouldn’t trust Kyuhyun to cook for himself. After finishing a simple dish, he planned to go and search for him in the university. He can’t bear to wait for him to go home in the evening so after that he got a quick shower, changed clothes and went to find him.

**

How do you concentrate working with something while tolerating the people around you? Kyuhyun didn’t want some of his group mates but what could be done? He needs to accept it and just go with the flow. The sooner they finish this research then he could get away from them.

However, he couldn’t miss the uncomfortable feeling whenever he senses Hyeri stealing glances at him. Kyuhyun busied himself with the books and revising the paper he holds. He doesn’t want to start a conversation with her. But wow, this girl is so persistent to talk to him and keeps on asking him simple questions which she obviously knows the answer.

“When is the deadline of the final revisions of this again?” Kyuhyun wanted to roll his eyes out of annoyance. The professor clearly announced the details before. It’s not his problem anymore if she wasn’t paying attention before.

One of Kyuhyun’s friends might have noticed his behaviour so he answered her instead. “Next Saturday,”

“Oh… so we really need to finish it tonight,”

“Hey! I don’t want to spend the night here again. We pulled to many all-nighters already,” another group mate said.

“Hyeri why don’t you just find some reference books there,” a friend said pointing at some books on the shelves. Disappointed that she’s being thrown by her group mates, she frowned walking away. Kyuhyun muttered a silent thank you to his friend.

“You aware that she has a crush on you?” he whispered.

“It’s so damn obvious. I can’t take it anymore,”

“You can just tell her off if it irritates you that much,” his friend suggested but Kyuhyun isn’t the type to tell those things straight to someone. He knows that he will hurt some feelings too. And he never knows how to handle girls having not much experience with them.

“How would I do that???”

“Tell her directly. If I were you I would do that,”

“I can’t. I’m not that rude. Can you do it for me??”

His friend looked at Kyuhyun like he was joking. “Are you serious? Now way!”

Kyuhyun just scratched his head and continued with his work frowning.

“Kyu, you should really do what he said. If Ryeowook knows about this he will surely be unsettled especially that you are both away from each other,”

Of course Kyuhyun knows this. He had been trying his best to avoid Hyeri but couldn’t since they both belong to the same group. Kyuhyun know that he only wants Ryeowook in his life and he hopes that the other have enough trust in him as much as he does.

Hyeri comes back to their table holding a lot of books. She opens one of them and asks Kyuhyun about something related to their topic. She leans undeniably close to Kyuhyun which made him uncomfortable again. He tries to scoot away but if someone will be staring from a distance they look so close to each other.

And it’s unfortunate the Ryeowook had to see it from a distance. He had guessed that he will find Kyuhyun in the library since he likes to stay there a lot of times.

He really found Kyuhyun in the library with his classmates but they looked so busy that Ryeowook decided to just go back in his dorm. Besides, he didn't like what his eyes were seeing at the moment but he doesn't want his mood to be ruined.

He walked back to his dorm with a heavy heart.

**

It’s 7pm when Kyuhyun reached his dorm so he walked inside not noticing that it wasn’t locked like before he left this morning. He threw his bag on the couch and went straight to the fridge to get him something to drink when he noticed it. There was a medium-sized container which wasn’t there before. He closed the fridge and went to his bed to find the person he wants to see for weeks now.

Kyuhyun can’t believe his eyes so he just stood there staring at the small figure lying on his bed. A few minutes passed before he moved to sit on the side of the bed. Carefully, he caressed Ryeowook’s hair before gently kissing his forehead.

The movements awakened Ryeowook and as he opened his eyes he was greeted by the warm and loving eyes of Kyuhyun. He immediately sat up shocked that he fell asleep and didn’t get to surprise him.

“Kyukyu!!”

“Why are you here?? I thought you – ” Ryeowook cut him off with a warm hug. He smiled hugging him back as tight as he could. “When did you arrive?”

“Yesterday. I’m sorry I didn’t mention anything, I thought I could surprise you but you see, I fell asleep,”

“You really did surprise me though. I didn’t expect to see you here. I thought some thief broke into my room,” he said.

Ryeowook faced him studying the face he missed and then he grabbed both of his hand and entwining it. “How have you been?”

“Still the same… surviving this course,”

“I expected that… by the way have you eaten? I made something since I know you spent a lot of money on take outs before,” he pulled him out of the bed and into the small dining table to eat their dinner.

"I missed your cooking. I am lonely living alone here without you," Kyuhyun said smelling the homemade dish Ryeowook brought. He happily digged in to the food while Ryeowook told stories about his adventures in Japan. He was so excited recalling all the new things he learned and all the experiences he had at his first time travelling abroad.

"You made a lot of friends there..." Kyuhyun commented.

"Hmm...they were so nice to me. One time they even let me have a mini tour of the city. How I wish you were there with me. We could have tasted the Japanese foods together,"

“We could do that someday. I want to travel the world with you,”

“Funny you’re saying that after you’ve given up your dream of being an artist. You could do a world tour if that happens,”

“It’s not possible for me but for you it can,”

“I don’t know…” Ryeowook said while watching his boyfriend eat. He also wants to know what Kyuhyun had been doing these days. Or rather he wants to know who the girl he saw before was. But he doesn’t like to open the topic afraid that he would sound jealous of her. He trusts Kyuhyun, he surely does but there’s something at the back of his mind that wants to break this trust. If only he wasn’t away fro weeks, he wouldn’t be this anxious.

“Ryeonggu,” Kyuhyun touched his hand after calling his name several times. Ryeowook realized that he was too preoccupied with his worries that he forgot to pay attention to him.

“You look troubled. Is there something wrong?”

“No—nothing. I was thinking of something. Don’t worry it’s not important,” Ryeowook flashed him a smile which erased the frown on Kyuhyun’s face. He missed seeing his beautiful smile.

“Are you going back to class tomorrow?”

“Not yet… I want to rest for a few days,” They went back to their normal conversation, with Ryeowook forgetting the questions in his mind. “But I will go and see my professor tomorrow.”

**

As Ryeowook’s graduation draws near, the couple spent shorter time with each other. Although they live next to each other, it didn’t help that they spent most of the day in the university. Ryeowook joins the practice for the graduation ceremony while he prepares for his last recital. Kyuhyun, on the other hand spend every day buried in his books.

They only got to enjoy a day with each other during Sundays where both of them has free schedule.  However, it doesn’t happen all the time.

Few weeks before Ryeowook’s graduation ceremony, he busied himself cleaning his dorm. His parents will visit him anytime soon to get some of his stuffs back to Incheon. He needs to let go of this dorm in a few weeks so he will find a new one out there.

He was packing a lot of his unnecessary stuffs inside a large box while Kyuhyun was lying on the couch reading his notes for his upcoming exam. Kyuhyun new that he was moving and agreed to let him stay in his dorm until Ryeowook finds a new one. They had some talks about sharing an apartment before and truthfully, Ryeowook wants to find a permanent one. If ever they want to keep their relationship permanent, this is already the next step.

“I think I should let go of this one,” Ryeowook said to himself looking at the plates and pots that he uses to cook a meal to survive in his dorm life. He carried the kitchen wares into the box a little bit noisily which can’t be prevented since the wares are either glass or stainless steel. He looked guiltily at Kyuhyun whose brows were scrunched together in frustration.

“I’m sorry Kyu, am I too noisy? You can go and review in your room for a while if you want,” he suggested.

Kyuhyun waved him off and concentrated on the lines he was memorizing on his book. Reluctantly, Ryeowook continued what he was doing, this time carefully placing the items in the box. He was doing fine until his clumsiness worked out again and he dropped the pile of plastic containers he was holding.

“Kyu you can’t memorized those laws you’re reading if you insist to stay here. I’m busy and I will disturb you,” he said when he saw Kyuhyun scratching his head in frustration from his peripheral vision.

Kyuhyun put down the book he was holding before sitting straight to face Ryeowook. “Why are you already packing that stuff? Isn’t your ceremony still weeks away?”

“I told you already that I will be moving some of my stuffs earlier. Aren’t you listening to me before?”

“I was… but isn’t it too early? You can do that stuff tomorrow and let’s go out to eat somewhere…”

“But Kyu I have a practice tomorrow…besides, you’re in the middle of your exam week. You should be studying,” Ryeowook said surprised that Kyuhyun can even suggest things like that.

“Yes but we haven’t gone out to eat for what …months already! Let’s just quit this stuff and go out on a date,”

Ryeowook went to sit down on the chair opposite Kyuhyun. He could see how his lover had been stressed out by their lack of time with each other. He must also be pressured to do well in his studies that his mood is now affected.

“I can’t… we’re both have some stuffs to do right now. You should just concentrate on your exams. We can go out when we’re both free,”

“And when will that happens? Next year? You see my professors don’t even give us time to sleep,” Kyuhyun complained.

“After my graduation I have more time to be with you now,”

“Oh really? But you don’t even have time to spend it with me now,”

“Excuse me? I always try to find time for you but whenever I see you, you’re busy with your groupmates!” Ryeowook’s tone starts to rise.

“It’s not my fault anymore!”

“It’s not my fault either!” he retorted. “Look Kyu, you’re letting your stress ruin your mood. Go on and have a rest. I don’t want to fight with you about this nonsense,”

“And now you’re avoiding this,”

“I’m not avoiding it. I’m trying to understand the situation—“

“No you’re not,”

“Yes I am. Don’t you think I feel hurt when I see you spend more time with your group mates than me? I shouldn’t be saying this but I am trying to calm myself every time some of the girls go near you. I’m trying to think that they’re just your friends and I am the one you love. You don’t know how much insecurity in myself I battle everyday just to keep thinking positive,”

Ryeowook’s lips quivered as he tries not to cry. He stands up to go inside his bathroom. “I’m taking a shower. Lock the door when you leave…” he said in a flat tone.

“Ryeonggu let’s talk about this…”

“Tomorrow, nothing good will come out tonight if we’re both angry,” he said before closing the bathroom door.

Kyuhyun wiped his face in frustration. Now that he had angered Ryeowook he will surely think of him until tomorrow. He went to his own room knowing that Ryeowook will only get angrier if he sees if after using the bathroom. He also knows that his anger is short-lived and everything will be back to normal tomorrow but Ryeowook’s last words bothered him.

He didn’t know that Ryeowook saw him with the girls especially with Hyeri. As much as he tries to avoid the girl, he never mentioned anything to Ryeowook. One reason was he was afraid his lover would misinterpret it. Second, they really didn’t have a chance to talk about it. Ryeowook had been so understand to him and what did he do? He pushed him to the extent of revealing his worries.

He cursed himself for making Ryeowook cry. Surely his little lover is crying behind that bathroom door. He saw his teary eyes while saying those words at him. He wanted to hug and apologize for being so rash but Ryeowook sent him away.

As Kyuhyun lay on his bed that night, he couldn’t stop thinking of the person next door. He hopes that tomorrow everything will be alright.

**

Ryeowook didn’t get enough sleep last night. How could he sleep well when he had just a fight with Kyuhyun. To make things worse, he had just revealed him his harboured resentment over Kyuhyun’s classmate. He didn’t mean to doubt the other’s loyalty but his frustrations had overcome his mind last night.

So today, Ryeowook got up early on his bed to prepare for the day. He heard Kyuhyun leave his dorm a few seconds after he woke up. He decided to just approach him during his vacant time later to talk. He wasn’t angry now that he had some rest and he believes that they need to talk about it soon before it gets complicated.

After Ryeowook took a shower and ate his breakfast, he went to begin his mission.

Kyuhyun crossed his fingers and prayed that he will get at least a passing score for his exam. He didn’t get to review well after what happened the previous night with Ryeowook. He didn’t even get a decent sleep as he tossed and turned in his bed wanting to go to the next room and cuddle with his beloved.

During the examinations he tried with all his best to answer the difficult questions and thought about all the things he memorized before. And when he passed the paper to his professor he can only sigh and wait for the results to come out next day.

“Kyuhyun, why is your face like that?” Minhyun asked. “Smile, we have only two exams to go!”

“I can’t. Not until I see the results,” Kyuhyun frowned.

“Oh you have more chances of passing it than me even if you didn’t review!”

“You don’t know what happened last night...” Minhyun stared at him. “Ryeonggu got mad at me.”

“That is bound to happen I think? You two will work it out in the end,”

“I hope so Minhyun,”

The two were interrupted when more of their classmates rushed out of the classroom having finished their own exams. Hyeri went towards the two boys with a big smile on her face.

“Kyu, Minhyun let’s go and have a lunch now so that we can review for the exam later,” she said standing closer to Kyuhyun.

“I’ll pass. I’m going back to my dorm,” Kyuhyun said.

Poor girl, Hyeri didn’t notice that Kyuhyun doesn’t want to go with her. She wrapped her arms on Kyuhyun to beg him which surprised even Minhyun.

“Please oppa... I need some comfort food after that stressful exam,”

Kyuhyun groaned in irritation as he prevents himself from blaming the poor girl of his problems. It was rather another bad timing for him since he saw Minhyun’s worried glance at him.

That is when he realized that Ryeowook was standing from a distance holding something like a lunch box, probably it’s for him. But instead of smiling at his little lover, he saw the unreadable expression on his face. Kyuhyun untangled his arms from Hyeri to walk to Ryeowook but his lover started to run the moment he went near him.

He called his name but Ryeowook never looked back.

**