VII.

It was a Thursday evening and Jongin, Sehun and Baekhyun were lounging in the minimal living area; all three feasting on greasy chicken ordered on the second youngest demand. They were loudly watching gag-shows that seemed to never end. Only Kyungsoo were present of the two inmates and was rather anxiously sitting by the bedroom desk trying to figure out a way to stop his headache from increasing as the rowdiness a few feet behind intensified. Sighing he dragged a hand through his hair while throwing a frowned gaze back at the guests shouting out in laughter. He had known and even approved of their arrival but due to a paper refusing to be finished was now bitterly regretting such decision. Chanyeol was at his parents house and would not come for least another 24 hour stretch. A soggy sense of longing turned within him despite his hard work on hindering feelings for the older to continuously mock him. 

He had tried to join his friends in front of the television but failed miserably to make himself comfortable enough to remain seated, for as their hands and words obliviously and unintentionally seemed to touch more inappropriate things than he tolerated. He wasn’t a saint per say but surrounded by boys at their peak of teenage rudeness he found it all too tiring; especially since the jokes were more than often to ridicule each other with names not too seldom tied to certain ualities. When they left to take the last train home he let out a sigh of relief. Picking up the greasy paper bags torn to be used as plates, he began cleaning away the evidence of others in their little haven; somehow it made him feel better. Shielding himself in the name of procrastinating he drowned the thoughts of wanting the apartment to be neat and tidy for the older’s return.

The following morning Kyungsoo gathered his things and got on the buss with sleep still stinging his eyes. It was cold outside; horribly so and no matter material nor thickness he could not seem to manage to make any gathered warmth stay. It was a busy day; lecturers piling even more workload on the already instabile academic tower. Despite the consuming stress Kyungsoo had a hard time caring much; he did not strive to enter SKY and therefore might as well spare himself the most raging pressure. Throughout the day he got small messages from the older who had been granted days off for home studies; the lettering would remain short yet precise in ways only Chanyeol could along with a few too many emoticons. Again Kyungsoo was invaded with an urge to see him; hear his voice and watch his stupid face change into that stupid eye-wrinkling smile. Dismissing the creeping wishes he buried the phone deep in his pocket where it remained the rest of the day; he knew it was a pointless act for as his mind was already caught up with nothing but his lanky roommate. 

Being home in the whole sense that home initially meant Chanyeol was unable to feel at peace with any of the warmth surrounding him. Home wasn’t home anymore; not without Kyungsoo that is. He longed for going back ’home’ almost immediately; causing a bad conscience to tear at his soul for not being able to appreciate his mother’s smile well enough. Eating her food and chatting with both parents were healing in the ways they should yet he wished for time to pass quicker. The coming day he did in fact leave several hours earlier blaming school and other musts. Nodding his mother had sent him a puzzling smile and later in her hard embrace she had chuckled lightly wishing him good luck with it all. Sitting on the bus he sent the younger several messages yet without revealing his small change of schedule. Soon enough he snoozed off; pulling his large coat closer to his body; it was awfully cold. 

Kyungsoo was cooking by the time keys faintly unlocked the frontdoor. Wide eyed he watched the taller hastily slam it shut behind him to not let all the heat escape out in the staircase. He put down his bag and ripped out the white earbuds from his wild ears before turning to the younger.

”Kyungsoo-yah!”

He boomed with an unmistaken excitement laced in his voice. Kyungsoo couldn’t help the wide smile that appeared as the older trampled inside; half kicking off his shoes, half ripping off his coat; all with limited grace. Though the air was almost knocked out of  the smaller as Chanyeol’s long arms encircled his body with a firm grip.

”I missed you!” The older exclaimed making the already flustered Kyungsoo more flustered. Chuckling he untangled himself while evening out his now creased clothing.

”It was barely two days.” He huffed with eyebrows raised but was instantly interrupted when hearing the dubujjige over flow the weak daiso-pot; Kyungsoo hurriedly turned to stop it from getting wasted. 

”What are you making?” Chanyeol asked after some drifting moments of watching the younger work with quick steps.

”Food.” Came bluntly and rather stressed; he stirred slow and sighed. Snorting Chanyeol closed the space between them to look down into the pot; his body pressed up against the tensing Kyungsoo.

”Your ’food’ smell nice as always.” He nodded before yawning soundly and with a deep voice mutter. ”It’s cold.”

Trespassing Chanyeol couldn’t refuse his heart from giving the younger a back hug and Kyungsoo was too busy with cooking and not leaning back into his touch to push him away. Burying his nose into the smaller’s soft nape Chanyeol closed his eyes in both comfort and despair; Kyungsoo's scent and warmth dizzied his already disoriented inner. Shivers involuntarily roamed across the younger’s body as Chanyeol’s warm breath brushed against his skin; finally getting rid of the icing cold he was now melting.

So they stood until Kyungsoo hummed he had to check the rice. Letting go Chanyeol’s eyes followed him closely; forever looking for clues in the mess that remained.

Their intimacy was even greater these days than before the rise and fall and it was hard to point out the biggest villian for as the one who initiated it was never stopped. Kyungsoo was uncertain whether the taller’s heavily increased affection was out pity due to the breakup and in a humble gleam would grow to always allow Chanyeol’s touches. He knew the older was in another spectrum and therefore lacking agendas pointing towards forbidden directions; something he himself wished he could execute with equal ease. He tried to remain indifferent whenever Chanyeol would come too close but was beginning to wear out dealing with such exhausting task; with a pounding heart he would try to swallow as soundless as possible and pray that his blooming blush would go unnoticed. 

They ate and Kyungsoo forgot to ask the older why he came earlier; too caught up in listening to his baritone voice filling the void of emptiness that managed to grow once left alone. They sat on the couch yet refrained from turning on the TV and with emptied bowls covering the coffee table Chanyeol leaned back into the squeaky furniture with a sigh. The sun had set outside leaving them with nothing but the weakened yellow light of old lamps. With a hand soothing down Kyungsoo’s back he thanked and complimented the food. Snorting ever so slightly the younger got up and began collecting the dishes only to be stopped by Chanyeol’s wide hand grabbing him.

”I’ll do that later.” He complained while ushering the younger to sit once more. "Help me get warm instead.”

”But you just ate warm food? And there is a blanket right there beside you — ” With a frown Kyungsoo merely tried to struggle out of Chanyeol’s grip as the taller drew him closer.

Chanyeol chuckled as he placed Kyungsoo's back comfortably flushed up against him; semi tangling their legs in process. ”But I am big and need loads — Besides I am tried from traveling and missed my roommate!”

Feeling a blush threatening to break out Kyungsoo turned and cleared his throat uncomfortably. He tried to come up with things to say to ease the situation but failed miserably as Chanyeol's exhale softly warmed his ear. Relaxing ever so slightly he too slowly enjoyed the shared proximity altering the coveted heat.  

”It’s been so cold outside these days.” Chanyeol hummed as if realizing he would have to cover up some of his utter inability to stay separated from Kyungsoo. When the younger remained silent he shifted slightly. ”But if you get too warm or want me to let go; tell me — okay?”

A small silence appeared before a faint sigh; ”Yeah.”

Noticing the hint of wavers in Kyungsoo’s voice Chanyeol felt a stab of uncertainty. He clumsily cleared his throat. ”You okay?”

Relaxing a tiny ounce more Kyungsoo closed his eyes. ”Yeah — I just, I’ve been cold too.”