Wanting the Selfish Chase
What Does Distance Really Mean? (Sequel 2)It's nearly a month and Mark's been filming day and night for his drama. He would come back to the dorm early in the morning or super late in the night. Got7 members almost rarely see him nowadays and being Mark, he's quiet about his days so no one really knows if he's exhausted, happy, or sad. He was good at keeping in his thoughts and feelings with a plain, straight face. Other than s, Baek Ji was around him often since they both were continuously filming together.
"Baek Ji-shi, can you help me run over these lines?" Mark asked as he twirled his pen in one hand as the other held onto the script.
"Drop the formalities and just call me Becky. I'm from New York." Becky told him.
"Oh, okay sure." He sweetly smiled.
Becky was easygoing with Mark and that loosened him up a bit. She was going to be the only one around him for the next couple of months so he thought it wasn't a bad idea to befriend her after all.
They began to practice their lines.
"I promise to remain by you through our toughest times. Can you just stay with me?" Mark recited.
Becky's character came to play, "Look, I don't want you to pity my luckless life. You saved me from my death and thank you, but you have your life too and I have mine."
Mark stuttered with his next line, "I lov-....I love-"
Suddenly he plopped down on the nearest chair and ruffled his hair. Becky was confused by the fact that Mark couldn't recite the 3 words. They were the easiest to say, weren't they?
"Mark, you only have 3 words left. What's wrong?"
Everything is wrong. Saying 'I love you' is specially for my wife only, no one else. He spoke to his own brain.
"Nothing. I think I just need some rest. Just give me time. I'll get it right eventually."
Becky examined Mark's weak posture and with her sharp vision, she zoomed in on his ring finger. She questioned herself if he was married. Becky was new to the Korean celebrity life so she doesn't know much about idols who became actors.
"Are you by any chance, married?" She didn't want to sound nosy, but she did want to know who she was working with.
Mark straightened up himself in his seat. "Yeah......I am. How....did you know?"
She looked at him questionably, "Was I suppose to not know? You sound like you're hiding the fact that you are."
"No, it's not that. I was only surprised that you know."
She let out a small laugh, "I didn't know, I just assumed since you can't seem to say the lines correctly and the I saw your ring. It sort of clicked for me."
Oddly, Mark looked at his own ring and moved his hand to the back of his neck, feeling uncomfortably that someone noticed is ring.
"Are you not proud or your marriage or something? Usually people flaunt that they're committed." Becky folded her arms, leaning on a nearby wall of the white room.
"I am......but as of right now.....its a bit tough.....marriage life is tough and to act a character who thinks he knows about love is too fake for me," Mark spilled.
His co-star occupied he empty chair next to him and ran her hand on his back. "Look, no one knows the true feeling as much as you, so add the raw feelings you know about love to this character. It'll make it all more realistic."
Mark moved his eyes to the girl's porcelain face to think that she was right. How could he have not thought about that? If he added his real emotions to it, maybe he'll feel more intact with this character of him.
He dipped in closer to Becky's face and stopped when his breath was close enough to her cheeks. Mark whispered, "Thank you."
With that appreciation, Becky felt her skin awaken by his minty breath and for that split moment, she had wished for his lips to touch her. She but her lips at the thought, forgetting that he's a taken man.
Mark had gotten up, unaware of his previous action that led the female to sin.
"Wait Mark, where's your wife?"
Wife shook Mark and so did the question. He knew where she was. She was back at home in LA, but he did not know where she was with life. Was she okay being alone without him there? Was she living and eating well? He couldn't answer those; therefore, he didn't see that it was worthy of him answering Becky's question thoroughly and honestly.
He replied, "I'm not sure."
"You're not sure? Perhaps, are you two still even married?" She carefully butted in.
"We are. It's a complicated marriage."
Truthfully, Mark didn't know what was so complicated. Really, it wasn't at all because all Kate and he had to do was talk their hearts out then they would be fine. Neither of them were mad anymore, but it's the fact that they are so far apart and to see each other is difficult. If anything, Mark blamed the distance for making him bitter, yet within him he knew love was strong enough to outweigh that separation, but he blocked that out. He was too stubborn because he felt the hurt was what made him feel alive. He partly liked how he was hurting because of his wife. That sounds awful, but he felt it was his turn to be selfish in testing his wife to chase after him because ever since his youth, he was worried about Kate no longer being there for him if she found someone who could tend her needs much better than him. His jealous heart thought of the first time his wife rejected him when he had asked for it, back at the airport years ago. He always felt like he was losing her and now, he wanted her to at least fear that she could also lose him.
Becky's voice tuned in, "Well, is she also here in Korea?"
"No," his answer was the simple truth.
"Then forget about her.....for now. If she's really your wife, she would understand you."
Mark agreed, "You're right."
"Maybe even being away from each other is even better for the both of you to think about yourselves." She spoke as if she had the upmost knowledge.
Mark only huffed. "She did call me a couple weeks ago, but I let my bitterness take over."
He didn't know why he was telling Becky this, but at this moment, she was the only one making sense and the only one who cared to ask him about his personal life. Heck, even s didn't ask him about such things. Well, then he blamed himself for also being unapproachable the past weeks.
I have been calling Mark to make up for whatever mess that happened. Sadly, each time the phone rang, he didn't pick up. I thought I should change up the routine so I called Jackson this time in hope that Mark was near.
"Hello, sister-in-law!" I was surprised at how he knew. It was then I remembered I was using my phone to call this time.
"Hi Jackson, how are you and the rest?"
"We've been working hard and resting well. How about yourself?"
Oh my god, to hear someone finally ask about me felt beyond wonderful. Only if it was my husband asking then maybe I would be much happier. I smiled into the phone, "I'm okay." I didn't want to lie and just as I finished my reply, I started to feel like throwing up. I pushed in my lips to hold back any incoming vomit, if any.
"Sister-in-law, are you choking?!" Blunt Jackson was funny even at a time when I'm not in my best shape.
"No, I'm not." Good thing I was able to hold it back down. To make light of that question, I asked, "Is Mark around?"
He told me Mark has been out lately because of his drama and for me to not worry because the brothers will take care of each other. We were about to hang up, Jackson told me to hang on.
"Hey, sister-in-law, Mark just got home. You can talk to him."
I was so jolly to know I was close enough to Mark to hear his voice. I could hear the thump of Jackson's feet to transport the phone, then voices came in. Jackson didn't mute his phone so I heard everything.
"Mark hyung, your wife is on the phone. She wants to talk to y-"
"Tell her I'm too tired."
"But you look fine to me so here." I can visualize Jackson handing over the phone, but then it sounded like I was swatted away.
"I told you I'm too tired. Tell her I'll call her later. By the way, this is Becky." I heard Mark's voice introduce a female's name.
"Hi. I'm Jackson. Who are you to my Hyung?" Again, there was blunt Jackson.
"Oh I'm–" She was answering him back, but my ears were too red to sit by and listen over the line. I tried to not think negatively of this woman, but it was hard. I reminded myself that I trust Mark.
Jackson returned to his room and spoke into his phone, but the call had already ended.
"Shoot, did she hear everything?"
Jackson was furious and was going to give Mark hell after his guest leaves.
"So this is how idols live?" Becky sat in the living room.
"Yeah, but since we're all guys, we don't really care about the exterior. As long as we're able to sleep in it, it's fine."
She nodded as she peeked around from where she sat.
"So, why didn't you take the call from your wife?" She was too curious, but Mark didn't really notice that all she's been basically talking to him about was his wife. He didn't think of it suspiciously, nonetheless.
"She can wait, I have a friend over." He motioned his hand to her. She was amazed at how he addressed her as a friend already. No complaint.
With that, they talked about work and how celebrity life has treated them. Turned out, the understand each other and to Becky's opinion, it was going to help their work be much easier.
Jackson payed close attention to what's going on outside his door. When it grew quiet and obvious that Becky had left, he opened the door just in time to meet Mark who was about to enter the bedroom. With a cool face, he looked past Jackson and stepped in just to be pushed out by his roommate.
"Hyung, why was a girl over? Did we all promise to not bring any girls over besides JYP family members and possibly our wives if the rest of us had one?" The Hong Kong man spat.
"Jackson, she's considered a friend."
"A friend? Was she more important that you could excuse yourself for a call from your wife?"
Mark's jaw clenched at the hateful words he was hearing. For the first time, Mark lashed out on his reason.
"If Kate misses me, she's going to have to try harder."
Jackson mockingly laughed, "So this is what it's all about? You want her to miss you?"
Mark stupidly nodded like a little kid.
"What has gotten into you?! Is it not obvious that she misses you?! She CALLED you for heavens sake!"
Mark talked back, "Doesn't mean she sincerely misses me! She only does so because she feel it's her job!"
"Are you serious right now, Mark Tuan, the one who fans deem to say is the most romantic of Got7?! She's YOUR wife! You both are MARRIED! You both LOVE each other! Is that not enough to sway you?!"
"Look, ever since our feelings were confirmed and we got married, I've always done the chasing. Now, it's her turn," Mark said venomously.
Jackson didn't understand. Was his friend's marriage going to fall apart? It can't be. He had to inform the others for back up.
Author's Note: I said this was going to be a long chapter, but it didn't turn out that way. :( hope you guys are still liking it! I'll try my best to be more precise and in depth.
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