(Song: Skylar Grey - "I Know You" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ECRRRcXycjI&index=4&list=FLRX9FGu_NmU0ATT9kK16XZA)

 

 

 

 

“I believe, I believe there's love in you,

Gridlocked on the dusty avenues,

Inside your heart, just afraid to go.

 

I am more, I am more than innocent,

But just take a chance and let me in,

And I'll show you ways that you don't know.”

 

 

 

I am frozen by her touch, and her flickering eyes. It feels just like before. It feels like we are who we were, before everything happened.

 

 

And I am scared somehow. As if she is going to devour me any second. Which is practically impossible. I am the ghost here, and she is just another weak fragile human.

 

 

“Joohyun-ah.” I call her, I call her in the way I used to. It sounds much weaker than I intended to. Like a prey trying to make one last cry. 

 

 

 

She doesn’t bother to budge. She closes her eyes. Only her eyelids fluttered a little, for a split second when I parted my lips. I should know better what this is leading to. But I don’t know why I want to ignore, to escape, to disappear from our ambiguous situation. 

 

 

I keep my eyes open, watching her closing in inch by inch. Maybe I should at least do something except sitting duck on the same bed with her.

 

 

So does it mean I am still feeling something for her? God damn it Son Seungwan, can’t you make up your damn mind? She just tried to kill herself for you.

 

 

I am still trying to sort out my messy thoughts and she is not wasting any time. Her hands keep me in position and I am powerless to move.

 

 

Our lips brush. 

 

 

 

I land my head on her shoulder and lock my arms around her tiny waist.

 

 

“Joohyun.”

 

 

I call her for the second time, I call her name on her shoulder through her shirt. This time, my voice grows even more feeble. She senses it and puts her hands on my back as a response. 

 

 

It eases me every time. It sends something into my body but also drains my strength from my limbs at the same time. Just unexplainable.

 

 

“I am tired.”

 

 

 

She hums and caresses my hair with her fingers, those delicate slender fingers. I feel like a little kitten, I feel safe, I feel loved. And her soft voice rings, “I’m here.”

 

 

“I know.” I try to inhale her scent into me.

 

 

“You know it doesn’t count as a kiss.” She slightly chuckles. 

 

 

“I know.”

 

 

“Then why?”

 

 

“I am figuring out things. It ain’t easy.”

 

 

“Can I help?”

 

 

“You just helped.” I pull away and stare at her looking up, our noses touch.

 

 

 

She tilts her head in confusion, out of habit. It looks really cute, and it doesn’t match her age at all. And I almost forgot she just attempted suicide hours ago.

 

 

It feels just like before. Everything. Those feelings I thought I had lost it long time ago. Or I had hidden them too deep that I thought I could not dig them out again. But I am feeling them all over again right now, in this very moment.

 

 

Now I know what should I do. I should give it a try. I should take control over things in my life again. So that I could really live again. 

 

 

“Enlighten me, Wendy.”

 

 

“I found out something doesn’t change. And, something kinda crazy happens to me. It sounds crazy but it’s true.”

 

 

She lifts a smile, “What is it?” 

 

 

I always love her smile. I mean, she already looks very beautiful just standing there. But it’s a totally different story when she freaking smiles. It blinds me.

 

 

 

I carefully hold her hands in mine as if they are the most fragile things in the world, and let my fingers trace those lines craved into her palms. I wonder if my part of the story is there when they could really foretell a person’s life.

 

 

I get a little shy with the words I am going to say.

 

 

“It’s your hands. There is electricity in you, and your hands.”

 

 

 

“Don't complicate it,

Don't let the past dictate.

I have been patient, 

But slowly I'm losing faith.

 

So please, I know you baby,

I know you baby.”

 

 

 

She then laughs. She laughs so hard that she even jerks her head back. If it isn’t me holding her hands, she would fall flat on the mattress.

 

 

So I laugh too. I haven’t laughed like this for a long time. It feels awfully good. It feels like living again - all warm, fuzzy and tingling. I feel it in me.

 

 

And I pull her close.

 

 

Her lips land on mine and I kiss her.  We stop laughing but our smiles don’t fade. She smiles against my lips.

 

 

“I thought you won’t kiss me again for the rest of my life.” She mutters.

 

 

“I can’t.” 

 

 

 

She stares at me for a while before opening again. She is not exactly the talkative type. She hides her emotions well with her pretty smiles and she doesn’t like to talk about them. She could be such a difficult person to understand sometimes.

 

 

But then, she says, “I love you.”

 

 

I didn’t expect her to be so direct and I blink, “I know.”

 

 

“Come back to me.” She says again, sounding more like a whisper, like a plead. “I am not going to live alone, in this house. No.”

 

 

I give a solid firm nod. “I am getting there. Just a little more. I mean it.”

 

 

“You’d never lie to me.” She grins and her nice white teeth show. She could be such a perfect person sometimes. “It’s just me.”

 

 

Then she suddenly hangs her hand low, hair falls from the side blocking her face. Her mood swings strikes again. 

 

 

 

I know her lips would be slightly jutting out, forming an unfit childish pout; her cheeks would be slightly flushed red, puffing like a cute little animal. I just know it without looking. I know her.

 

 

And I scoop her scarred wrist to my lips, “Leave them behind.”

 

 

“You mean-” She jumps a little, earning another smile from me.

 

 

“Wait for me.” I flash her a smile, the smile she likes.

 

 

And, she is finally happy.

 

 

 

 

 

-

 

 

 

 

 

“I believe, I believe you could love me,

But you're lost on the road to misery.

And what I gave to you,

I could never get back.

 

Don't complicate it,

Don't drive yourself insane,

Say what you will,

But I know that you want to stay.”

 

 

 

“So we are having a little talk with the mayor?” Xavier turns around as I arrive at the roof of a huge mansion.

 

 

“He must know something. Like why his daughter broke up with Marius.” I look down and spot a swimming pool as predicted. 

 

 

“How’s Irene?” He asks quite casually while looking around as I do. I think he might have the superpower of reading minds. Although we share most of the abilities as a spirit. I don’t know him that much after all.

 

 

“She’s fine now.”

 

 

“You talked?”

 

 

“Yeah, we talked.” 

 

 

He takes a few steps backwards to take a good look at me, “You have found your reason.”

 

 

“I think it’s worth a shot.” I spare a glance to check on his expression - expressionless as always. “After what just happened. So thank you.” 

 

 

“My job is to help you, Wendy.” He lifts the corners of his mouth. “I’m happy to help you. I’m happy to meet you. I mean, you’re a good person. Not that I’m happy that you’re dead. Just so you know.”

 

 

“I get your point, Xavier. Nice to know you too.” I chuckle patting his shoulder.

 

 

“Let’s go and meet the mayor now, shall we?”

 

 

“My pleasure.”

 

 

 

 

 

-

 

 

 

 

 

“Stop it now sir or we might use force.” Xavier shouts as he chases after the old man.

 

 

“I will cut him off.” I head towards the other wall as he nods.

 

 

 

I emerge from the other end of the corridor, ready to scare the out of him.

 

 

And I see him running towards me yet looking back while reaching something out from his back. 

 

 

 

A shot is fired. Loud and bright. But it doesn’t hit anyone, just another wall. Poor walls. 

 

 

It goes through Xavier. And the old man looks like he has just ted his pants. I shrug and grab him from behind, knock him unconscious.

 

 

 

“What the did he just try to shoot me ?” Xavier pats the dust off his suit before dragging the man back to his study room.

 

 

“We were talking peacefully a minute ago and he suddenly took out running.” I frown. “So he lied. He knows about Kwon.”

 

 

 

“Sounds fishy enough to me.” He throws him on the chair and adjusts his limbs to look natural. 

 

 

“Perhaps he tried to cover up the behind his daughter’s death. Look, his wife isn’t even around at home at this time.” I conclude.

 

 

 

“Possible.” He wipes his hands on his neatly-ironed trousers. “I didn’t know he has a gun.”

 

 

“Do you think he is threatened too ? Carrying around a gun like that ?” I inspect the said object one last time before placing it on the desk.

 

 

 

“The mystery guy his daughter was seeing seems to be our next clue.” 

 

 

“But also thanks to him.” I fish out a phone from the unconscious man’s pocket. “He did mention about the club’s name right ? Let’s search for anything related in his phone.” 

 

 

 

Xavier stands beside me fixing his collar, “You’re smart. I can tell we’re getting there.”

 

 

“You too.” I smile and start another investigation with my ghost or spirit or whatever friend. “I couldn’t do this without you.”

 

 

 

 

 

-

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Chemicals rushing in,

I know it's you that I belong to.

I'm fighting like a cannonball in the air,

Crashing into who I belong to.

 

The shadows of your heart are hanging in the sweet, sweet air,

The secrets that you hide, control us and it's just not fair ……”

 

 

 

“Unnie, I believe you because I can’t find a better reason to explain all these.” I watch Joy heave a sigh after pacing back and forth in my house after Wendy left.

 

 

“We are here to accompany unnie, not to judge her.” Seulgi scolds the younger girl and gestures her to sit down. “Ay… I know it since they’d never found her body.”

 

 

Yeri blinks her big eyes and tugs my shirt, “Unnie, does it mean Wendy is coming back soon?”

 

 

So I turn to her and pat her hand, “Yes. She’s coming back for us. All of us.”

 

 

 

“Unnie,” Joy softly calls fiddling with her fingers, looking nervous. “Please don’t do it again….. We, w-e love you too.” 

 

 

“Shhh, Joohyun-unnie is alright now. Wendy-unnie saved her. If Wendy-unnie is coming back, Joohyun-unnie isn’t gonna leave us, right ?” Seulgi drapes her arm over the girl’s shoulder and a tear drips on the back of her hand. 

 

 

Yeri bites her lips as tears forming in her eyes too, “Unnie, we are here for you too. Please also tell Wendy-unnie so. We want her back too.”

 

 

 

I look at the girls and they all nod. I feel ashamed all of the sudden.  “I’m so sorry. I made mistake first. But I won’t make it again. I promise.”

 

 

They all adore me, look up to me. Still, I am not always a good unnie for them. I cheated. I messed up my own life, Wendy’s life, and his life. They all still love me the same, especially Wendy. Who I am to deserve these.

 

 

The girls gather around me and hug me. I enjoy this little peaceful moment. I’m glad I have them.

 

 

Yes, she said leave them behind but I would still keep them in mind. I know Wendy. She is too precious. I already hurt her once. I know she would forget them easily. I have to win her back.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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