It’s a week more before the concert. Cap went  out early in the morning and move  to the beach. He just want to feel some peaceful moment. He take a deep breath while looking at the calm beach. The sound of wave.. so refreshing..

They have a practice today around 11 in the morning. Cap get in the lift and when  he opened the door of the dorm, he felt a weird environment. Nobody is seen. No voice, no earthquake, no smell of burnt cooking, no shout. It just silent and peace. He wondering where’s the kids.

He went to the kitchen and get something to drink. He take the bottle and went to his room. But he noticed something. Wait, why everyone is here???

“what are you guys doing in my room??” cap asking them and they look shock with the sudden appearance from his leader. Cap just stood there and looking one by one. why I felt something wrong here.

“no.. nothing hyung..” Ricky said while looking at the others.

“hyung… can we know what is this medicine use for??” the brave one, Niel sudden asking Cap and showed the medicine in his hand. Everyone faced look like they need an answer for that.

Cap eyes become bigger. Oh no, not that one. where they find it. Did I not save it well??  He run towards Niel and grabbed the medicine from him.

“oh, its just a normal medicine..where you find it?” cap save the medicine in his pocket. He just hope they don’t ask anything more. He get so nervous. No, its not the right time yet for them to know the truth. Im not ready to explain it yet.

“but, its not like a normal one..” Changjo try to ask Cap back. I think I have seen something like that before but don’t know where.

“we find it behind your pillow. Im sorry if we get in without your permission. I just want to find something that maybe I dropped here last night while we are fighting in here..”L.Joe explain the situation to his leader. He found that medicine before he ask the other if they know about it.

“its ok.. its nothing.. don’t worry anymore ok. Its just a normal medicine I take a few days ago. There’s nothing to think about.. now, lets hurried up.. we have practiced this morning right…” cap smile at his dongsaeng even he is very scared. He scared about the truth. He just praying that this conversation ended up here.

“stop lying Bang Min Soo hyung..” the sudden voice from Chunji make Cap down.. so down.. Chunji only called his full name when there’s something is wrong. Everyone looks down at floor.  Cap can’t feel his leg. He want run, run away from here.. he can’t get in this moment yet. Please…

“we already know the truth hyung..”L.Joe speaks while holding Cap shoulder. “we know what have you hiding behind us for all this time…”

Cap felt blank.. lost. Like everything infront him is  spinning. Everything become dark. He can’t think of anything.. the words ‘we know everything’ keep crossing his minds. He fell down and put his back lean on the wall. He take a deep breath and closed up his eyes.  Then he can heard Ricky crying, Niel asking him if he is alright.. he open his eyes and looks at one by one. Ricky and Chunji crying face, Niel worried face, Changjo blank face and L.Joe hang on tears face. ‘how can I face this situation’

Niel and L.Joe take him up and put him on the bed. While everyone sit around him.

“tell us hyung…tell that everything is not true…”Ricky begging Cap while hold on Cap’s leg.

“how do you find this out?” cap asking them without make any eye-contact. He can’t see their face now. He can’t and he don’t want to.

“we ask the doctor that give you this medicine. He told us everything. Why you make this decision alone hyung?? We need you..it’s almost one year you kept hiding this matter from us. You don’t believe us?? Why you don’t share this thing with us while almost everytime you advice us to not kept any secret between us. You know that if u already make the operation, you are safe now… but why… whyyyyy…” niel can’t continuing his talks when he bursed with tears. He wipe his tears that down on his cheek but it keep flowing. It can’t stop.

“I’m sorry guys…”Cap don’t know what else to say. He just can say sorry again and again and again. He don’t know how to explain it since everyone already know it. What must I do now. I can’t face them like this. It’s hurt for me to see them like this.

“if I did that operation, I don’t want to take the risk for you guys can’t make the tour concert. It’s important for us right. Besides, it’s not a confirm that I will survive from that operation. I still not ready to leave you guys. I’m not ready to make that decisions yet. I’m scared..” the words that come out from Cap make everyone more sad. It’s because of us, Teen Top he don’t want make operation. How come he still thinking of us while he is dying. And it almost a year he hold his pain alone.. thinking of that make me feel so hurt inside.

“cap hyung….why you still thinking of us while you are dying.. don’t you think about our feeling?? You will leave us hyung.. not for a while but forever hyung…forever.. whose Teen Top without our leader..please don’t leave us hyung… we need you… we love you…”chunji wipe his tears. He still can’t believe it.

“no!! cap hyung will not leave us!! Cap hyung will stay with us forever!! Tell me that this is joke hyung… tell me that.. he will not died!! He will survive soon….” The sudden shout from Ricky make everyone locked their mouth. They lost their words. They only can heard a voice of crying. Ricked hug Cap tightly. Cap hug him back.

Oh my little Ricky. .”yes Ricky, I will stay with all of you forever. Don’t worry. I will  survive.. I keep stronger day by day because all of you. Teen top is like a brother for me. You’re always there for me. You all cheer me up, every day in my life is a shining day because of you, because of Teen Top, my family and my ANGEL…”

“we will be strong for you hyung!!” L.Joe hold Cap hands and whisper “fighting”

“I love you guys so much….” Cap cry hard infront of his dongsaeng. He never cry infront them before. No matter how, no matter what, he will keep his tears  away from his dongsaeng and Angel. He don’t want anyone see his crying face. He is a leader, he must show the strongest side of himself. If not, how his group will be strong.

When they see Cap’s crying face, they noticed something. Our leader who always stay strong and never cry, is now crying. He must have endure so much pain. He must felt very burden alone. Angel, if you can see the leader is crying right now, I debt you all will be very shocked  same like me now.