-I can’t believe they’re back in Japan! – Hyunmi cried – it’s so unfair!

I laughed.

-Why would it be unfair? It’s their job! – I chuckled.

-Yeah but why can’t they have all of their concerts in here?

-Oh come on! They’ve been in Korea for quite a while.

She pouted and shook her head, I laughed, then sighed.

-I miss them too – I mumbled, looking at the sky.

They were back on track, they had their Korean promotions, and then they had been constantly going back and forth from Korea to Japan, from Japan to Korea…I rarely saw them, and it big time, I, the same as Hyunmi, couldn’t help but wonder why they had to spend so much time overseas.

-Awww look at them at the airport – she whined – CUBE is making them work too hard, they just had that concert at Manila and now they’re off for the Secret Diary concerts in Japan…look at Minhyuk, he looks so tired.

She basically threw her phone in front of my face, I stumbled to keep it from smashing my glasses, taking the phone on my hand and pulling it away to be able to actually see something, and stared at his photo, he did look tired, he had that expression on his face he only pulled out when he was worn out, and I could see the bags under his eyes, which even if cute, worried me.

I suppressed another sigh.

-Well it’s their job, it’s what they love doing – I muttered.

-Yeah, yeah I know-she said, quickly taking her phone back.

We walked for what was left of our way to the university in silence, and I had that unsettling feeling on my chest which I knew wouldn’t go away until I was able to speak to Minhyuk.

That is what I hated about Hyunmi being a hardcore BtoB melody, it was hard for me to handle the whole distance thing, we lived in the same city, but it sometimes felt as if we were having a relationship in the distance, it , a lot, and the only way I could handle was keeping my mind from them, especially away from Minhyuk, I didn’t want to think about how hard they had to work, or how tired they had to be, it only made it  more difficult to handle.

-Hey, you alright? – Hyunmi said, as we climbed up the stairs.

-Huh? – I mumbled absentmindedly – yeah, yeah I’m fine.

-Eish look at you! You were thinking about BtoB right? You act as if you don’t care but you’re as much as a crazy fan as I am – she said, hitting my ribs with her elbow.

-Ouch, ah! Stop it! – I protested – yes I’m a fan and you know it, and for God’s sake stop hitting me, I’m going to sue you!

-There, there crybaby – she said, stretching her arm to try and reach the top of my head (quite a feat given the fact I was way taller) – and don’t you worry about our boys, I will use my contacts to make sure you get to meet them all.

I bit my lip to keep myself from bursting into laughter.

-Yeah, I’m sure you will – I giggled.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

-Aaaah I’m tired – Eunkwang said as he stretched on the airplane seat.

-Hmmm – I nodded, my earphones still on.

-Yah, Minhyuk-ah – he protested, poking my side with a finger.

-Whaaat? – I said while yawning.

-Why are you being so antisocial? – he pouted.

-Stop pouting please, it’s disgusting – I begged – and I’m not being antisocial.

-Yes you are! You’re always on your phone – he continued.

-I’m just trying to beat this game – I mumbled, as I started playing the said game.

-Yah, Minhyuk-ah – Eunkwang said, this time in a more serious manner, taking my phone from me.

-Yah!

-I’ve been waiting for you to tell me willingly, but since it doesn’t seem like you’re going to do that I will ask, what’s going on between you and Ha In?

I stared at him, brows furrowed.

-What’s going on between Ha In and I? – I asked confused.

-Don’t play fools with me! – he protested.

I kept looking at him confused.

-Come on! You two are very awkward around each other lately!

-We…haven’t been around each other lately, Eunkwang-ah.

-Eish come on! You know what I’m talking about – he said, wiggling impatiently on his seat.

-Shhh! Don’t be so loud! People are staring at us – I told him.

-Then? Tell me!

-Tell you what?

-What happened between you two? You know what I’m talking about, you’ve been so awkward around each other ever since the MV shoot!

I’m not exactly sure how my expression changed, but it must have, in some way, because I saw Eunkwang smile grow wider, knowing he had hit homerun.

-Sooo?

-We…Well – I moved around my seat uncomfortably, the plane was already taking off – alright but this can’t get out of here, really, nobody can’t know this, especially not Peniel.

He looked at me expectantly.

-Jesus Christ you’re a king of gossip…That night…when we went back to her flat…well, one thing led to another and we ended up…

I waved my hands, blushing furiously and trying to make Eunkwang guess the rest.

He raised a brow.

-Oh! – he said smirking – so you finally did it huh?

He patted my arm.

I shook my head.

-No…we…we almost did, but…aish – I brushed my hair with my fingers furiously – Hyunmi called, and while she talked to her I fell asleep so…

Eunkwang started laughing.

-Only you would have fallen asleep in a situation like that – he chuckled.

-Yah! I was knackered! – I blushed.

-Okay so what?

-Well, I lost control in such a way that being close to her after that…I’m just scared of losing control again and scaring her away or something like that….

He laughed.

-You sound like Hulk – he said, still laughing.

-Eunkwang-ah! I’m not telling you this so you can laugh at me! I’m being serious, I’ve never lost myself in such a way! And whenever I see her, even just thinking about her I just…

-Aww look at you, like a teenager gone berserk – Eunkwang mocked.

I glared at him, and sat straight, staring at the seat in front of me, clearly showing my intention to ignore him.

-Minhyuk-ah – he said, pulling at my sleeve – Minhyuuuuk!

-Shhhh – I hushed.

-You shouldn’t worry about scaring her – he said, now straight faced, as if trying to demonstrate he was taking the issue seriously now.

-I can’t help to do so, she’s so…

-Pure? – he said smiling, clearly trying not to laugh again.

I glared.

-She is, I don’t know Eunkwang, she means so much to me, I just want to do this right.

-I know, I know, you’re a hopeless romantic, but the more you delay it and try to plan it, the worse it will be, it should just flow naturally – he advised.

I sighed and rested my head against my seat.

-I guess you’re right, anyway it’s not as if we’re going to be together anytime soon – I muttered.

-You’re right, we’ve been way too busy, still I can’t believe you haven’t found any time to talk about this and…

-You’ve said it yourself, we are so awkward around each other, when we are alone I mean, that’s why I’ve never dared to…you know give it a try again, she looks so nervous…

-Yeah sure… - he said giving me a weird look.

-Why are you looking at me as if you knew something I don’t? – I asked annoyed.

-She told you she was ready, and I saw her the day after, she looked agitated, but not as if she was scared, I’d say what you call nervousness it’s actually anticipation.

He gave me a know-it-all look and I stared at him speechlessly.

-Would you please stop messing around with my mind? Especially now that all I’m doing is putting kilometres between us!

-Alright, alright – he said, laughing while holding his hands up.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

The rush of the concert, the adrenaline which came from being onstage with all the Melodies chanting our names, helped me forget all the things Eunkwang had gotten inside my head.

Still, as always, she still was present in a corner on the back of my head, she was always there, and I couldn’t help but wonder if Eunkwang was right and I had just been a complete idiot, and given the fact Eunkwang had already been right all along last year, when I wouldn’t even dare to imagine Ha In could return my feelings, now I was going crazy.

The talk with Eunkwang and the fact I had been away for so long already was making me miss Ha In way more than usually, I itched to see her, to hear her voice, to hug her and look at her face…

I looked at my phone, she had to be home already, I went inside Instagram to check her profile, I didn’t follow her in any social media, just to be discreet, but I did check them regularly, especially when I was away.

I saw she had posted a picture with Hyunmi, they were in her university’s cafeteria, Hyunmi was pulling a silly face and Ha In was laughing, I loved it when she posted pictures like those, with her laugh captured to be kept forever, I could almost hear it. Then I went to Twitter, just to check, she had tweeted something a few seconds ago:

“Ahh such a tiring day, I lied on my bed and now I can’t get up to wash my face T.T”

I laughed, she still had to be online, so I rushed to tweet:

“Ah it’s annoying to remove makeup…”

I pressed send and waited, normally, if she saw I was on my phone she would message me, and we would talk for a while.

“I will try to put more heart”

My phone beeped.

“Good night! How was the concert?”

I smiled and answered.

“It was incredible, what about your day?”

“Eiish you could give me more details…It was long, boring and tiring -.-“

“Yeah I know, saw your tweet”

“Were you being stalkerish again?”

“….maybe, you looked gorgeous today by the way”

“Don’t say that stuff like that, it freaks me out!”

“Whyyyyy? I’m just making a statement, you’ve also seen pictures of me right?”

“Well yeah, but that’s different, you’re famous and my best friend is a huge fan of yours, she shows me pics of you almost every day”

“Yeah well I’m your boyfriend, who hasn’t been around for weeks, I just wanted to see you T.T”

“Go and take your make up off >.<”

“What about you?”

“Already did, I’m on bed right now ^^”

“Do you want me to let you sleep?”

“Nooooo! I want to talk to you”

I laughed, and stretched to take some photos. Then went to Twitter once again.

“I’ll go to wash, darling wait for me while looking at these photos ㅋㅋ”

I dropped my phone on the bed on my way to the bathroom and proceeded to wash up and get ready to go to bed.

I dropped on my bed and scrambled around to get under the covers.

“I’m back!!”

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