i already used the "wake-up song" reference, so here's another SHINee morning-clip :)

ref: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_bYQbUB54s

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When I call Minho it’s late at night in Seoul but lunch-time at his photo-shooting in Buenos Aires.

“You okay, Hyung?” he wants to know

“Please tell me about that night”, I ask him without preface, “tell me what you remember.”

“Jinki”, he says concerned, “what happened?”

“Please, Minho, just tell me”, I beg him, “I’m trying to remember but there are still blanks in my mind.”

He sighs and then asks “what do you want to know?”

“The shot”, I say, “did you notice, or did you just catch Taemin, when he was hit.”

“I heard the shot but I couldn’t see the girl shooting, because Kibum moved and got in the way. “

“He moved?”

“Yeah”, Minho confirms.

“But ...” a revelation is forming in my mind, “... but Kibum saw her, didn’t he?”

“Yes”, Minho says, “at least that’s what I think.”

“Then he knew ...?”

Minho sighs again.

“I’m not sure about this, Jinki, but Taemin swears Kibum knew.”

Before I can think any further about what that means there’s another thing that comes as a surprise.

“You talked to Taemin about the night?”

“Of course we talked about it, Hyung. We talked and talked and talked.”

“But, why did he never talk to me about it ... and why didn’t you?”

“Jinki ...”

“What?” I’m angry now, I feel betrayed and left out.

“Jinki”, Minho says softly, “you were in psychiatric care because you couldn’t talk about it, because you couldn’t bear to even think about it. Don’t you remember that?”

I swallow hard. Of course I know that, I just ...

When I start crying Minho is really worried and offers to come back as soon as possible. But actually the tears feel like a release. I can’t even explain it, but it’s like I finally began to open a door that I didn’t dare open for a long time.

I say “no, no, I’m okay, I guess. Thank you for telling me” and hang up. Got to call him again in the morning I think.

---

I can’t sleep. I toss and turn and at six I give up, take a shower and dress.

It’s an early visit but I hope Taemin doesn’t mind.

“Hyung”, he says and gives me a big smile and an even bigger hug when he opens the door. I’m surprised to see him downstairs. But he shows me that he can handle the stairs to the second floor on crutches now. His parent’s got him another chair for the first floor so he can go around the house on his own.

He’s alone so we sit in the kitchen and he’s making breakfast. It reminds me of our days in the dorm again, but it’s a good memory.

“You talked to Minho?” Taemin asks, “he called me in the middle of the night and told me that you’d probably come by.”

“Yeah, I talked to him. What else did he tell you?”

He takes his time while laying the table but when we finally start eating he says:

“You’ve started to remember, he said.”

“I’ve always remembered”, I answer, “it’s just ... well, there are blanks I need to fill and I’m not sure, if I understand everything.”

Taemin scratches his head and I involuntarily wonder if he will ever cut that hair again.

“Ask away”, he says, “what can I help you with?”

It feels awkward to expect help from Taemin. Shouldn’t it be the other way around?

“Can you talk about everything?” I want to know.

He gives me another one of his precious smiles.

“Hyung, YOU were the one who wouldn’t talk. Don’t you remember how you always avoided to mention Key Hyung? Once you almost screamed when they played “can’t leave” on the radio in the sanatorium and shoved me away when I tried to comfort you. And it wasn’t even us singing.”