“Give my phone back!!”

You yelled in desperation, both hands hovered in the air in a futile attempt of snatching your cell phone back from your older brother who now had it held high above you. Too bad you mother’s gene didn’t give you much advantage on the height.

“I can’t believe this…” He growled, voice eerily low and filled with rage. Eyeing the tightly clenched jaw, you could easily tell how he was trying to hold back his anger. How he tried his best not to snap in front of his own little sister.

“I trusted you, ___… Yet look at what you did…”

He jerked his hand to the front, showing you whatever displayed on the phone screen. He had read everything. And that was your fault for forgetting to lock your phone.

“I-I didn’t do anything!” You wailed, “I… I mean— I didn’t do anything wrong! I’m just checking on them… t-that’s all!”

His eyes darkened, and with a single swift move, your brother shoved your phone into his pocket, “Yes you did, young lady. It’s beyond wrong and I hate it. Way a lot. And it seems that you’ve been underestimating me all this time, because unfortunately, I’m not as stupid as you thought…”

He soon headed for the door, but you managed to stop him, “No, oppa! Give me back my phone! P-please! Don’t take it away from me! Don’t further separate me from the boys! They’re the only ones who could make me happy! I… I just can’t live without them!”

“Is that so…?”

His stare quickly turned into a glare, “Then what am I to you? Are you saying that I can’t make you happy? Does me being here mean nothing to you!?”

You didn’t even mean to offend him, yet your bad choice of words further lit your brother in fire. And now you couldn’t see anything but hatred in his eyes.

“O-oppa… that’s not what I meant! Of course you mean everything to me—but I need them! I need the boys…! They’re—“

“STOP!! STOP TALKING ABOUT THEM!! LIVING SECRETLY WITH SIX DIFFERENT MEN… DID YOU EVEN REALIZE THAT YOU’RE MAKING YOURSELF LOOK LIKE A !?!?”

Your brother’s temper had never been the sweetest. He flipped out a lot in the past and you knew how bad things could be whenever he snapped. But just now, he did something that he had never done before.

Something that he would end up regretting for the rest of his life.

Something that eternally scarred your heart.

O-oppa… D-did he just… He just called me a—

You staggered backwards, tears already b out. You couldn’t believe what just happened and neither could he. And in fact, your brother was just as shocked as you. He saw your pained expression and soon had guilt slapped him back to his senses.

“___… I-I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to… I-I was—“

That second, you pushed him out from your room and locked the door right away. Slumping to the floor, you soon brought your knees to your chest and cried loudly.

“___! W-wait— open the door! Please!!”

You heard frantic knocks on the door, but you were too broken to even care. A wall was once again appeared between you and your brother, and this time it was because of his own fault.

“___……” He whispered.

“…I’m sorry.”

December 29th.

Your brother’s lips briefly parted as he sighed. His tired eyes darted at the empty snowy road below the window of his bedroom. The road seemed lonesome with no one passing by, and it somehow made him felt even lonelier. Even emptier.

He should have been happy to be home again. To finally see his precious little sister after a whole year of parting. Yet now he was far from happy. And it surprised him how the longer he stayed, the more suffocating it became for him. 

What should I do… What is the right thing to do…?

While his frustrated mind lingered around randomly, a buzzing sound came from behind. Leering his eyes back, your brother nearly cursed the second he found out that it came from your cell phone.

Again…!? Doesn’t those ers even know how to give up?!

The noise eventually stopped in less than a minute and he soon took his steps to check on the small device laid on his bed. For a moment there, he mentally took note how he was technically lucky because you never changed your passcode, not even when you were changing your cell phone. And that further gave your brother the freedom of rummaging through your private gadget.

[83 Missed Calls]

[37 Unread Text Messages]

[262 New KakaoTalk Notifications]

Annoyed, he quickly deleted the notifications on the top-bar, not even bother checking them out. He was about to toss the phone back to the bed when a new Kakao Talk notification appeared on the screen.

[Unread]

21:25 [Hyukkie] Where in the world are you?!??! Why didn’t you read our chats?? Are you okay?! You’re scaring us!!!!

Staring intensely at the brightly lit screen, your brother nibbled on his lips. He had his thumb hovered in hesitation when another notification popped out.

Should I reply? Or… should I just turn the phone off??

He gulped, soon decided to open the unread chats. Scrolling through the chat history, his parted rim gaped even wider when he learned how the chat room was literally in complete chaos. All of the chat bubbles were full with questions about your sister. And the same happened when he checked on your text messages. All of the missed calls had their names on them, and now your brother was struck in sudden realization. He was torn between continue despising the boys or believing in how they sincerely cared for you.

How you were just as important as they told him.

Should I… believe in them…?

Your brother paused for a good few seconds before shaking his head. He was about to turn the phone off when another batch of chat bubbles filled the chat room. Some were saying something like ‘you finally read it’, ‘what happened to you’ and ‘why are you doing this’. And your brother soon found a way to stop the chat bubbles from popping.

21:50 [___] I’m okay. But everything is messed up so please stop sending me texts. Don’t call me and don’t even think of coming here. I will contact you guys again as soon as things get better.

He tapped the ‘send’ button with his shaking thumb. Later blew out a deep sigh when the words ‘read by 6 people’ appeared on the left side of the chat room. But what surprised him was the fact that the chat instantly stopped. None of the boys wrote a reply. Not even an ‘ok’.

Whoa… Have they always been this obedient to her…?

He waited for another ten minutes but the chat room remained static. Still nothing from the boys and it further left your brother in awe.

“So they listen to her, huh?”

Putting the phone on the night table, his attention soon shifted to a frame perched on it. It had a picture of you and the boys inside it, all smiling happily in front of what looked like the entrance of Lotte World. Taking a better look of your smiling face, tears soon found their way out from your brother’s eyes.

When was the last time I saw her smile…?

His eyes soon scanned the whole bedroom. It still looked the same, but something forced your brother to feel that it was no longer his. It wasn’t because of the bags and other stuffs scattered on the floor. Neither it was because of the small photo frames that magically appeared on his desk. And instead of getting angry because he had strangers taking over his room, your brother felt strangely in joy. Like he was getting new younger siblings to care for.

Walking to his desk, he grabbed one of the frames. A thin smile curled on his lips as he saw a picture of the seven of you sitting inside a pretty-looking café with cakes decorating the table. On the bottom of the picture, a ‘Happy Birthday Leo’ was added in bright pink letters. Everyone was laughing and he saw how you got your head leaned on one of the boys’ shoulder; whom he assumed as the ‘birthday boy’. You were grinning from ear to ear, showing nothing but happiness.

Running a hand to ruffle his dark locks, your brother closed his eyes. Last night he played detective and thoroughly checked on your phone, hoping to find anything indecent in it. But much to his disappointment, and also relief, the result was negative.

Just when he thought he could use whatever he found in your phone to send the boys to jail, he got himself staring at lots and lots of selca of you and them. Some were taken at cafes, malls, Lottle World and Jeju beach. There were even bizarre-looking pictures of sleeping Ravi; mouth gaped wide and with N trying to pour chili peppers into it; and Ken with a deer-like anime character hat on his head.

He didn’t even get to feel happy when he found some videos in it, because they all turned out to be videos of Ken singing, Ravi’s fail raps and N dancing to girl groups’ songs.

Have I been wrong all this time? Do they really mean no harm to my sister? Are they really going to protect my sister? Can they really make her happy?

He opened his eyes and starred at his locked door. The scenes from last night reemerged and he could feel his heart sinking as he recalled what you told him.

“—They’re the only ones who could make me happy! I… I just can’t live without them!”

Your brother nearly choked on his own spit when the word ‘’ he lashed out to you rang inside his ears, haunting him. Your scarred expression became the next to come up and up to this point your brother wasn’t sure if he will ever be forgiven for that one.

— I totally messed up this time… Calling my own sister a ‘’, I’m definitely the lowest… The worse brother ever. Didn’t I promise mom and dad not to ever hurt ___ again…? Yet look at what I did……

That instance, he walked out from his room, making his way to yours. Knocking on your door softly; your brother wailed, calling your name. But there was no answer, exactly as expected. Yet he knew that you couldn’t be sleeping. More like because he knew that you’d spend your whole crying instead of sleeping.

“___…”

Taking a deep breath, your brother continued, “I know you’re still awake. And I know that you’re listening to me now…”

He made sure that his voice was loud enough for you to hear, “I-I’m sorry… I’m so sorry… For everything I said last night… I’m truly sorry……”

No response.

He didn’t hear answer.

But it was too late to turn back now.

It wasn’t forgiveness he sought.

But for you to hear the truth.

“I… I’m confused… I can’t even believe myself… But I won’t lie that I was really angry with you… Words can’t describe how disappointed I was when I found out that you’ve been living together with those boys… B-but—“

He bit his lip, feeling the sting on his eyes grow, “A-Actually… I’m… I’m scared…”

Your oppa paused for a moment, tightening his balled fists before promptly continued, “I’m scared that you’d leave me alone… That they’d take my position away— replacing my role as your ‘brother’… It was hard for me not to be jealous when you said you couldn’t live without them… That they’re the only ones who could make you happy… I-I…

“It hurts…”

“…So much…” His hunched body began to tremble, “I’ve failed as a brother… I realize that I can never bring you happiness, just like mom and dad did in the past… I’m the only family you have left— yet I left you alone… And last night I let my temper take the best of me… I hurt you… I made you cry… I broke my promise to our parents……”

“I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have done that…” He let out a series of hitched sobbing, trying hard to hold back the tears.

“I should be the one to protect you… Yet I was never there when you needed me. It’s my entire fault… I’m sorry that I can’t be the best brother for you… I’m sorry that I can’t be like mom… o-or dad. But I promise I’ll do my best… I-I promise I’ll never hurt you agai—“

“…I know.”

The soft voice had your brother instantly looked up; watching as the door slowly opened and revealed a smiling face behind it.

The face of the one person that he’d never give up on. The only subject of his affection. The only love of his life that he’d sworn to protect and to look after for the rest of his life.

You.

“___… I-I’m sor—”

Without saying a word, you pulled him into a hug. You let your hand travelled to his head, caressing the soft locks.

“Sshh… Don’t cry.”

He hugged you back almost immediately, finally letting the sobbing come out loud, “B-but I….”

“There’s no need to apologize, oppa. Well, aside from calling me names, I’m actually glad that you’re being honest with me… And this is what I’ve been waiting for.”

You whispered to his ears and felt his hug on you tightened, “And no… you didn’t leave me. Because I know the reason why you left…”

You slowly pushed him back, staring right into his eyes, “It’s because you want us to have a better future. To live a better life. That’s why you studied hard to get a scholarship in Japan, so that you can get a proper job. Because we can’t depend on mom and dad’s savings forever… Right?”

He was loss for words.

Everything that you just said was right. He never wanted to leave you alone. But his responsible as both your brother and the head of the family didn’t give him much of a choice. Yet he was beyond surprised to have you knowing that he’d been doing all of this for your sake. For your future.

You smiled, brushing your thumb against his cheek to wipe the falling tears, “So… Am I right? Hmm…?”

He sniffed briefly, later flashed a weak smile at you. Your brother retorted back with a soft hum and you pulled him back into another hug afterwards, “You see… I’ve been thinking for the whole day too…”

You snuck your arms to his sturdy waist, “I’m sorry about the boys… But believe me, they didn’t do anything wrong or bad to me. So please, stop hating them… I don’t expect you to believe their stories now, but— I’ll wait. So… yeah, I’m sorry for being so childish too— for being so selfish.”

You let your fingers grip on his shirt tightly, “So let’s patch everything up together, oppa…”

He blew out a chuckle, caressing your head, “Can you give me some time to think about it? I… I’m still not sure on what to do with them. Maybe I’ll accept them later, well— maybe… But for now, I just want to spend my time with you… Deal?”

“Deal.”

You giggled, playfully squeezed him before releasing the hug. “Now go wash your face and fix me something to eat because your sister is starving.”

He laughed, wiping dried tears from his face, “Yes, Ma’am…”

You were about to close your door when your brother suddenly took your wrist. “W-wait…” He said hesitatingly.

“Umm… Want to go out tomorrow? You know… to ‘patch everything up’?”

December 30th.

“Aishh… Where is he?!”

You grunted, scanning the crowded street. Roughly two hours ago, your brother took you to the forever-bustling Myeongdong, saying that the two of you would definitely have fun together. Yet the last thing you remembered was the image of him running away while screaming something like ‘that store is holding a big sale’. But wherever he had gone to, you brother had clearly skipped the part that you weren’t following him. 

Huffing angrily, you stopped in front of a shop to feel your sore legs, “Aishh… ‘to patch everything up’ my …! If I knew that this’d end up as another shopping spree I would have turned him down yesterday! Hmph!”

You continued walking while whirling your neck around, looking for any signs of him. But he was nowhere to be seen.

“Geez! He really reminds me of N and Leo—“

That second, your steps met an abrupt halt, with your annoyed expression drastically changed into a sad one. Memories from your first visit to the shopping district with the boys resurfaced, reminding you of all the joy and laughter you shared with your dearest voodoo dolls.

I wonder what they’re doing now… Have they eaten? Are they missing me as much as I do…?

You once again rescanned your surroundings, pathetically hoping that you might see those faces that you missed the most. But no matter how far you looked, your eyes caught no one but strangers.

Chuckling to yourself, your gaze shifted to the café across the street. It was the very same café from when Leo went missing. The place where you finally got to learn Hyuk’s intolerance to milk and N’s secret obsession to banana milk. A place full with irreplaceable memories.

Stay strong, ___… You will meet them again soon… Probably…

Holding back overwhelming sadness, you brought yourself to another memorable spot in Myeongdong. Squatting in front of the big glass window, you eyed the small creatures on the other side of the solid surface, watching as they wiggled their tails happily at your presence.

“Annyeong, little ones…”

Your smile widened as you stared at dozens of