Title: Blondie
Pairing: Hunhan
Genre: crack/comedy/ Harry Potter AU
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1685
Summary: Luhan hates Zitao for getting him into this mess and Blondie is an attractive .

For Lily because she's master editess and a wizard at life :)
 

Luhan doesn't hate muggles exactly. He just hates a certain muggle born idiot that goes by the name of Huang Zitao.

Luhan scowled, staring at the scrap of paper in his hand that was supposedly a map. Tao had invited him over for winter break to his house in suburban London, but instead of traveling together like normal people, Tao had given him directions by bus and this map. Meanwhile, Tao was busy meeting up with a friend first. Luhan wasn't quite sure when "snogging the Slytherin prefect by the suit of armor on the second floor" became considered meeting a friend, but that wasn't the reason he hated Tao so much. 

No, the hating Tao part came from the Tao gave him direction to his house by bus part. What part of I'm a wizard did Tao not understand, Luhan thought bitterly, clutching Yugi's cage closer to him. Had it never occurred to Tao that giving Luhan an address to apparate to, or floo network to or even ride a broom to would be so much simpler? Or if you had to pick some bus, at least pick the Knight's bus? Instead, Luhan was standing in a crowd of muggles, all whom were waiting for the bus and all whom were giving Luhan strange glances. Luhan glanced down at himself and realized why, flushing slightly. He was still wearing his thin school robes because he forgot to change into jeans. 

Luhan glared down at the map once again. And no, Tao couldn't have gotten him an actual map. Instead the Ravenclaw boy had decided to draw the map himself. The so called map consisted of a dotted line, a few squiggles, a red X and a star. "The X stands for the bus stop and the star is my house!" Tao had explained quickly before rushing off to "meet up with friends." The directions Tao gave him were written in Tao's chicken scratch handwriting and were of no help whatsoever. 

Finally the bus arrived and Luhan cautiously walked up the steps into the heated bus. Prying two coins from his pocket, he dropped it into the slot and ignored the judging looks that he and Yugi were receiving, The seats were already filled so Luhan reached up to take hold of a handle hold, leaning slightly against the back of a chair for balance. 

That was when one idiot behind him had the audacity to laugh. Turning on his heel, Luhan glared around looking for the one who laughed and saw the culprit. Unlike Luhan, the said boy had found a seat and was currently leaning back and smirking at him. 

"What do you want, asswipe" Luhan snapped. He wasn't usually this snippy but it had been a long day and this blonde haired boy was grating on his nerves. 

"Be careful," the blonde haired boy warned with a smug smile two seconds before the bus started moving and Luhan jolted causing the blonde boy to burst into laughter. Thank god he was holding onto the handle hold. Looking up to glare at the obnoxious blonde boy, Luhan snarls, pulling his lips back to show off his pearly whites. The action only causes the blonde boy to laugh even harder, causing the other passengers to stare at the two of them warily. 

The bus skids to a stop and Luhan thanks Merlin that there are only 5 stops left before he can leave this hell-hole. Wait, Luhan squints at the scratches on the paper and realizes no; its not 5 more stops. Its 15 more stops in this swaying metal thing with a blonde guy laughing at him. Luhan reminds himself to go kill Tao later, or at least use the tickling charm on him. If Luhan had thought the Knight's Bus was bad, he didn't anymore. That squeaking bus with Stan as the driver was as docile as a kitten compared to this muggle driven device. The bus kept on swerving bringing Luhan with it, Yugi's cage just narrowly missing someone's face.

The bus doors slid open with a creak and an old lady walked in, crane in hand and Luhan debated against warning her against riding this torture device and keeping his mouth shut so that the pumpkin pastry he ate on the Hogwarts Express would stay in his stomach. He decided that the latter choice was much smarter and watched helplessly as the old lady clambered up the steps, not bothering to slide two coins into the slot. Oh, right, the senior citizen privilege, Luhan thought. Free rides in a torture device.

However, he's even more annoyed when Sehun suddenly rose out of his seat before ushering the old lady in, charming her with his sweet smile and lilting voice. No, not sweet smile, more like an evil grimace, Luhan thought with a grimace of his own. 

The grimace turns into a scowl when he feels someone standing behind him, close enough so that if leaned back just a little bit, his back would be pressed flush against their chest. Luhan turns his head around slowly, trying hard at subtlety. Of course it doesn't work.

"Hey there princess," a husky whisper sounds behind him and he flushes maroon.

"Blondie," he snaps back, not half as quietly. His insult is met with soft laughter.

"You'll have to try harder than that to rile me up darling," the blonde guy murmurs, lips just a few centimeters away from Luhan's ear, exhaling a warm breath over Luhan's face and despite everything, Luhan shivers. 

Then the moment is broken when the body behind him moves away and Luhan lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "," he mutters, but he can't muster up enough venom for the insult to sting.  His jibe is met with soft laughter and pale hands wrap themselves around Yugi's cage, taking it away from Luhan. Luhan turns, looking at the blonde boy questioningly and he just gives Luhan a soft smile.

Its a genuine smile this time unlike all those smirks and smug grins Luhan had seen before and Luhan can't help but think that Blondie is actually somewhat attractive. Then of course, the moment is ruined once more. The bus swerves around a corner and Luhan is flung backwards into Blondie and the two of them crash onto the ground, Yugi's cage clattering down with them. Luhan really hates busses but he can't deny the small tingling sensation in his stomach when Sehun stands up and gives him a hand up also. He thinks its called butterflies. (Screw Jongin and his huge collection of romance novels Luhan cursed)

Coincidentally, the two got off at the same stop, 13 stops later. It was now snowing and the cobblestone road was slippery with ice, the streetlamps dimly lighting up the dark street as the bus drove off. Without a word, Blondie, as Luhan had taken to calling the guy turned right and began walking. Luhan's eyes followed his dark silhouette before the figure disappeared completely out of view. 

 he thinks before he turns the opposite direction and starts walking, squinting quizzically at his map. Looking up and around to see if anyones around-- there's no one-- Luhan takes out his wand and quietly mutters Lumos under his breath. The tip of the wand lights up faintly before glowing brighter and Luhan turns the map around and around and around. Nope, there is no way he's going anywhere with this map as his guide, Luhan thinks bitterly as he turns off the light on his wand and settles for just walking. He can't tell if he's on the dotted line or one of the squiggles surrounding the red X and he doesn't think it matters anyways. A few left turns later he hears someone calling his name and this someone sounds remarkably like Tao.

"Here!" he shouts back, looking around for the person shouting for him and finally he sees two figures walking towards him. Two figures? When they're close enough and Luhan sees the second figure's face he pales considerably because its him. Its Blondie. 

Blondie seems equally shocked to see him and that comforts Luhan somewhat.

"Tao," Luhan squeaks out, still clutching Yugi's cage tightly in his hand. He can feel himself tensing up, "what is he doing here."

"Have you two met?" Tao asks oblivious to the glares Luhan is sending his friend and completely missing the smirk his friend is wearing. "And why are you still in your robes, Lu?"

"We've never met," Blondie cuts in smoothly, running a hand through his hair. "Introduce us Tao?"

Tao looks at the two of them questioningly but obliges, introducing the two, "Luhan, this is my friend from Beauxbaton, Sehun, and Sehun, this is my friend from Hogwarts, Luhan. I invited both of you over for winter break."

"Pleasure to meet you, Luhan," Blondie- sorry, Sehun purrs, smirking as Luhan visibly stiffens. "We'll have so much fun this winter."

"The pleasure is mine," Luhan spits back, ignoring the confused glances Tao is sending him. 

Like a chivalrous gentlewizard, Sehun gently unclasps Luhan's hand from Yugi's cage and carries it himself as they start walking and Luhan contents himself with staring at Sehun. I'm just making sure he doesn't throw my owl away, he convinces himself. Its not because I'm imagining how his shoulders will look dressed up nicely in a fitted dress robe. 

Luhan groans as Tao babbles beside him about jinxes and unicorns or something. Yixing? Lay? What does that even have to do with unicorns, Luhan thinks bitterly, still staring at Blondie. 

Blondie-- no sorry, Sehun turned around to find Luhan blatantly staring and just chuckles. "I'll let you see my wand if I can see yours," he teases making Luhan flush again before he retorts, "In your dreams ."

Blondie just laughs and winks at Luhan, making him drop his jaw on the ground. Blondie is not attractive he convinces himself and the he isn't going to pop in the middle of the street.

It was going to be a long winter break.