CHAPTER EIGHT

At 10:45pm on a Thursday night, Chanyeol, Baekhyun and Kyungsoo find themselves at Hongdae for supper. They’re at that deotbokki place that Chanyeol likes best and Kyungsoo isn’t really in the mood for it, but he’s just glad to be able to wind down in the company of his best friends again. 

It’s been a week since the three of them have been able to hang out together. He’d last seen Chanyeol two nights ago when he came over for dinner and he saw Baekhyun every day (for obvious reasons) but he had missed being able to hang out with them both as a trio like this. 

The end of yet another month was fast approaching so this naturally meant that Kyungsoo and Baekhyun were hard at work on EXO’s next issue. Chanyeol, on the other hand, was exceptionally busy lately because Jongdae’s debut teaser was going to drop next week and being the music producer—for the first time—he wanted to make sure that everything was nothing short of perfect. 

Everything is the same as it usually is, Chanyeol and Baekhyun are exchanging jokes while Kyungsoo quietly listens as he always has. Yet, he can’t ignore the subtle differences in the atmosphere tonight. Overall, it’s cordial but there’s an underlying tension that’s rolling off of Chanyeol in waves. 

Throughout the meal, Baekhyun is engaged but obviously distracted. His phone keeps buzzing beside him and Kyungsoo notices every time Chanyeol visibly twitches (with annoyance?) each time his screen lights up and this puzzles him. 

For the n(th) time that night, Baekhyun picks up his phone to type out a reply to a message. Chanyeol’s brow twitches, but he doesn’t react… at least not until Baekhyun suddenly bursts into a fit of laughter and that appears to be the last straw.  

“Who are you even talking to?” Chanyeol’s tone is sharp and this gets Kyungsoo’s full attention instantly, eyes darting curiously between his friends as the mirth quickly slides off Baekhyun’s face. He could tell that Baekhyun too was surprised by Chanyeol’s reaction. 

It had been such a long time since Chanyeol had openly displayed any kind of displeasure, much less anger, sometimes they honestly forgot that Chanyeol could get hostile if he was unhappy. He had always been the mood maker, dubbed as the “Happy Virus” for good reason because that’s just how he had always been. Even when he did get upset, he always reigned it in to avoid dampening a jovial atmosphere and he had only ever confided in Kyungsoo privately once the moment had passed. Even then, he only ever did so if he really couldn’t cheer himself up (which didn’t happen often either). 

Baekhyun quickly slips a grin back on his face when he replies. “Jongdae.”

Chanyeol fowns at the name and this reaction surprises Kyungsoo. After all, Chanyeol had been the one to introduce the two to one another. 

In general, Chanyeol got along with everyone. It would actually take a fair amount of effort to feel ill at ease with the smiling giant because he literally radiated warmth everywhere he went with his bright disposition and genuine interest in everyone that he met. 

However, while he was usually able to quickly become friends with anyone as long as he set his mind to it, his friendship with Jongdae had been sparked off from the moment they met. Like Chanyeol, Jongdae was a big ball of sunshine and even Kyungsoo had quickly warmed up to him from their first encounter. 

Needless to say, Chanyeol got along swimmingly with Jongdae and for that reason, he had introduced him to Kyungsoo and Baekhyun a couple of weeks ago. Kyungsoo got along well enough with him, given his quiet personality at least, but Baekhyun and Jongdae were another thing altogether — their chemistry was electric. It could even be suggested that the pair hit it off even better than Chanyeol and Jongdae did. Kyungsoo remembers how amused he was watching them that night, having been reminded of beagles from seeing how they were so excitable that it almost seemed as if they were running circles around each other. Much like popping chasing after one another’s tails playfully, Kyungsoo had thought that they were kinda cute. 

“I’m meeting him tomorrow actually!” Baekhyun continues, sounding characteristically chipper as he reaches over to grasp Chanyeol’s hand with both of his. “We’re gonna catch Jang Soo Shop, do you wanna come with us? You said that you had a craving for chicken, we could get some of that after the movie! What do you say?” 

“If you want to get in Jongdae’s pants,” he snatches his hand from Baekhyun’s grasp. “I’m sure you can do so easily even without my assistance.” 

Kyungsoo winces at the expression of hurt that crosses over Baekhyun’s face.

As Chanyeol fusses over buckling Kyungsoo’s seatbelt for him, the latter can’t stop thinking about how strange Chanyeol’s behaviour was tonight. 

Supper came to an abrupt end after Chanyeol’s unprecedented outburst rendered conversation feeling terse and contrite, and Kyungsoo took it upon himself to spare everyone from further discomfort by announcing that he wanted to sleep (and both were quick to agree that it was “getting late”). 

After footing the bill, Baekhyun had quickly bid them both good night before bolting off, saying that he had somewhere else to be. Kyungsoo had waited for Chanyeol’s reaction then, expecting him to stop their friend or at least apologise for what he had said earlier on, but Baekhyun was already dashing off in the opposite direction from where Chanyeol’s car was parked. 

Kyungsoo had sighed at this but Chanyeol had probably heard him, but chose not to acknowledge it, slipping his hand into Kyungsoo’s instead as they began walking towards the parking lot without so much as a backwards glance at Baekhyun. 

“What are you thinking about?” 

He looks in Chanyeol’s direction but says nothing. 

“You’re awfully quiet, won’t you talk to me?” 

Kyungsoo’s stare bores holes into the side of Chanyeol’s head and the elder finds himself getting increasingly nervous with every second of silence that passes between them. 

After what feels like a horribly long time, Kyungsoo finally asks, “why did you react that way to the prospect of Baekhyun being close to Jongdae?” 

“React in what way?” He asks, throwing a smile at Kyungsoo that doesn’t quite reach his eyes, feigning ignorance. 

“You’re never selfish about anything.” Chanyeol stiffens. “Yet you’re being possessive about your relationship with Baekhyun?” 

It didn’t make sense to him how Chanyeol was being jealous when he had been the one to introduce him and Baekhyun to each other in the first place. Chanyeol hadn’t been bothered in the slightest when they started getting close. In fact, Chanyeol had been thrilled about the prospect back in the day, because it meant that they could hang out together and now Baekhyun was one of his best friends. 

“Don’t ask me questions I don’t know the answer to…” Chanyeol sighs in surrender.

Kyungsoo doesn’t miss the way his knuckles whiten as his grip tightens on the steering wheel. 

“Perhaps it’s something you might want to consider?” 

Chanyeol doesn’t say anything and the rest of the ride continues in silence. 

He only replies when they finally pull up at Kyungsoo’s apartment complex. He takes Kyungsoo’s hand in his again—and is relieved when he doesn’t pull it out of his grasp—and walks him to the lobby. 

“I’ll think about it, okay?” He mutters, sounding almost petulant as his thumb rubs circles into Kyungsoo’s palm. “But only because there’s nothing I wouldn’t do if that’s what you wanted.” 

“Apologise to him by the end of tonight, alright?” His voice in muffled in the cashmere of Chanyeol’s pullover, but he hears him anyway. 

“For you,” he whispers into his skin, nuzzling into Kyungsoo’s neck. “I’d do anything for you.” 

Before he can say anything to set him straight, Chanyeol is pulling away and marching back to his car, hearing Kyungsoo’s exasperated sigh behind him. 

He sees Kyungsoo still standing where he left him when he drives off, but he doesn’t dare make eye contact for fear of what he may see on his best friend’s face. 

He knows it’s probably selfish, but he doesn’t want to stop. Even if it weighs down on Kyungsoo’s conscience, Chanyeol is going to keep loving him because it’s always been Kyungsoo. Loving Kyungsoo is a part of him and has been for years now. 

But Chanyeol couldn’t deny had Kyungsoo had brought up a good point. Why had the mere thought of Baekhyun possibly preferring Jongdae’s company over his leave him feeling so sore on the inside? He doesn’t blame Kyungsoo for being confused because even he was baffled by his own reaction. 

Kyungsoo wasn’t wrong in his description of Chanyeol earlier on because he too never considered himself to be a possessive person… Yet here he was, feeling a sense of dread at the prospect of Baekhyun and Jongdae’s blooming friendship. The question is… why? Could it be that he… had feelings for Baekhyun?

But then how could he be sure? He had never actively considered that possibility with anyone but Kyungsoo before, least of all Baekhyun…

…not because the idea of dating Baekhyun was repugnant to him, but simply because he had never considered it to even be plausible before. Even though he hadn’t been head over heels for Kyungsoo yet when they had first met, Baekhyun had always seemed out of his reach and that something he accepted as a fact right from the start. 

After all, Baekhyun was the personification of a “social butterfly” and if that wasn’t enough, he was so damned beautiful. 

Baekhyun had been dating someone else when they first met and he continued to date his fair share of both boys and girls throughout their undergraduate days. It wasn’t surprising that, with his lethal combination of good looks and a wicked sense of humour, he had no shortage of suitors. For as long as he could remember, Baekhyun was always pursuing someone or being pursued. Whether or not he was actually in a serious relationship was secondary, the point was that Baekhyun always had a suitor. Moreover, he had fallen for Kyungsoo shortly after they’d met and Baekhyun had been the first to know. These factors made it difficult to even begin to think of Baekhyun in a romantic light. 

Even then, he couldn’t deny that Kyungsoo was right: he did feel possessive over Baekhyun. 

The fact was that even if he hadn't considered falling in love with his best friend as a possibility before, Baekhyun did make him feel things that he felt with no one else… not even Kyungsoo. Baekhyun was always this special person in his life and he hadn’t a shard of doubt in his mind that he did love him… he just didn’t know in what capacity and it would be hard to explain it, simply because he hadn’t tried to rationalise it before. 

Distressed by the ambivalence of his thoughts, Chanyeol eventually settled for tucking that thought away in a box in his mind labelled ‘pending’ and suspended all consideration for another day. 

They slip into some sort of a routine. Kyungsoo doesn't question how or why it happens, it just does.

He starts seeing Jongin more regularly, as they meet up for coffee (at least) once a week (sometimes more). Jongin is always the one asking him out, and though he tries to play it cool, Kyungsoo never says no.