CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Baekhyun’s hands are so clammy, it’s ridiculous. He’s a grown man, for ’s sake, he had no reason to be nervous. 

But yet he was. Very much so. 

“Why are you so tense?” He nearly jumps a mile in the air at the sound of Jongdae’s voice. It’s bright and sonorous, very pleasant to the ears and befitting for a person like Jongdae, what with his warm and outgoing personality. 

He pads into the living room with two mugs of hot tea in hand; camomile with two teaspoons of honey, the way he knew that Baekhyun liked it. Not that Baekhyun had ever explicitly said so, but Jongdae has always been more observant than most. He gingerly makes his way towards the sofa where Baekhyun was sitting, albeit unnaturally. His back was ramrod straight and his knees were pressed firmly together, hands folded neatly across his lap. Baekhyun’s manner was like a student who was awaiting punishment from his homeroom teacher and this thought made Jongdae laugh because he knew for a fact that Baekhyun was far from that… if their activities from earlier that afternoon was any indication to go by.  

For as long that Jongdae could remember, he had been hard at work preparing for his debut. However, with the big day looming closer and closer, the hours at the studio also got longer and longer. As a natural consequence, he hadn’t had much time—or any, really—to see Baekhyun that week, and Jongdae missed him. A lot. Far more than he had ever expected to miss someone that he had been seeing on and off for the past three or so months. In many aspects, they were practically a couple… but yet at the same time, they were not? Jongdae hadn’t the faintest clue what he was to Baekhyun or where he stood with him. 

To say that Jongdae was pleasantly surprised when Baekhyun showed up at his door step earlier that afternoon (with a box full of cookies and a small bouquet of roses, no less) was an understatement. He couldn’t hide the thrill in his voice when he greeted Baekhyun and pulled him into a hug. When he feels Baekhyun’s hands sliding around his waist to hug him back, Jongdae is overcome by the happiness that always seems to wash over him whenever he’s in Baekhyun’s presence. 

Instinctively, he knew that his increasing attachment to Baekhyun was going to be a cause for concern. In practical terms, he was going to kickstart a hectic promotion cycle soon and the last thing he needed was to be distracted by an ambiguous relationship. But more urgently, he needed to find a way to manage his feelings. If his affections for Baekhyun were to continue growing, he would inevitably come to start yearning for things that he knew Baekhyun wasn’t ready to give. After all, given that Jongdae has always been more observant than most, he wasn’t blind to the fact that Baekhyun was in love with someone else. Frankly speaking, if one paid enough attention, it was actually painfully obvious. For one, Baekhyun had never spoken of them in future tense. Jongdae couldn’t shake off the feeling that Baekhyun was waiting for someone else and that he was but a substitute. Whatever it was between them was just for Baekhyun to fill the void at present; it was becoming increasingly clear that he didn’t envision this arrangement lasting longer than that. He couldn’t lie, the thought stung a little but not that much, at least not yet. He wasn’t in love with Baekhyun right now, but he knew that if they continued this song and dance any longer, he would be. In the back of his mind, Jongdae knew that at best, whatever he felt about Baekhyun would be cumbersome; but in the worst case scenario, he would end up heartbroken. 

However, Baekhyun doesn’t give Jongdae an opportunity to think too much about his reservations. In fact, Jongdae can’t think of anything once he feels Baekhyun’s mouth hot against his, tongue slick as it over his lips. The kiss takes him by surprise and is far too risqué for a greeting, but Jongdae has no intention of questioning it; having been so busy for the past couple of days, Jongdae is more wound up than he had realised and the prospect of sweet release coming in the form of a very attractive Byun Baekhyun was impossible to resist. 

As such, Jongdae lets himself be led from the door to the sofa in his living room, all the while being expertly stripped by Baekhyun without once breaking their lip-lock. Baekhyun teases with his mouth, evading his lips then capturing before escaping again. It riles Jongdae up in the best possible way, how Baekhyun’s tongue traces the contours of his lips, nibbling playfully. When they finally collapse onto the plush cushions, Jongdae is half hard and the sight of Baekhyun’s swollen spit-slick lips when he pulls away to gasp for air only fuels his arousal. He wastes no time in pulling Baekhyun over him by his neck and inviting him in-between his thighs, urgently trying to shed Baekhyun of his clothes whilst planting feverish kisses over newly exposed skin.

Soon enough, Baekhyun is sinking down onto Jongdae’s slowly; hot, slick and willing. Jongdae unabashedly lets out a loud groan as he instinctively rolls his hips upwards into Baekhyun’s tight heat. It makes the latter laugh a little at his partner’s eagerness as he braces his hands on Jongdae’s sides to keep his balance. Jongdae is usually a very considerate lover; he always made sure that Baekhyun was adequately prepared for lovemaking before entering him (stretching him out throughly with slippery lubed fingers that somehow always managed to brush against his sweet spot to leave him hot, bothered and giddy with want) and once he did, he always gave Baekhyun ample time to adjust to his girth before moving (sometimes driving Baekhyun crazy with how long Jongdae took to be convinced that he was comfortable when all Baekhyun wanted was to be ed hard and fast) because he never wanted to risk causing his partner any pain (even if it meant having to exercise a herculean amount of restraint on nights where Baekhyun was being exceptionally y). Today was the first time he’s seen a crack in Jongdae’s usually iron-clad self-control and it turned him on more than he thought it would. 

Baekhyun’s brows are furrowed in concentration as he tries to take every inch of Jongin. Impatient, he moves too quickly and the sting of pain shoots right up his spine, causing his face to contort with discomfort. Jongdae notices this immediately and his hands move to massage Baekhyun’s back in hope that it would provide him some relief. With eyes glued on Baekhyun’s face, Jongdae waits for him to set the pace, watching as he rocks his hips slowly and his expression gradually changes into one of pleasure. Taking full advantage of his position on top, he plants both his palms of Jongdae’s sturdy chest to steady himself as he lifts up and then drops back down…. again, and again, and again. 

Jongdae can’t tear his eyes away because its so beautiful how Baekhyun looks right now, wantonly ing himself on Jongdae’s . The lewd sound of their skin slapping together fill the room as Baekhyun bounces on Jongdae’s harder and faster. Baekhyun’s is high pitched, his mouth hanging open as his eyes flutter, seeming to get louder and louder each time he sinks up and down on Jongdae’s shaft. If Baekhyun keeps this up, Jongdae’s neighbours are gonna be shooting him dirty looks the moment he leaves his house so he threads his fingers through Baekhyun’s hair and drags him down to exchange passionate kisses, if only to shut him up. 

Baekhyun’s riding becomes erratic and he starts to make needier noises, muscles straining in his thighs and collarbones coated in a sheen of sweat. Jongdae knows that Baekhyun is close, so he s upwards with even more fervour, profanities uncharacteristically spilling out of his mouth when he looks down to see his moving quickly in and out of Baekhyun because the sight is just so hot. Baekhyun was so ing hot. Jongdae closes his eyes and then opens them again to see Baekhyun’s face. He reads his expression and he knows what’s going to happen so he slams into Baekhyun with purpose and soon enough, Baekhyun’s release is coating Jongdae’s chest while his mouth sputters incoherent words. Jongdae doesn’t slow down. He continues rutting up into Baekhyun’s with force, shortly after just as Baekhyun slumps on top of him from the exertion, breathing heavily. 

Baekhyun wasn’t intending to seduce Jongdae at his doorstep, but he couldn’t help himself the moment he laid eyes on Jongdae in his wife-beater, which put his deliciously sculpted arms on display. But beyond carnal attraction, the truth was that Baekhyun missed him. That was what propelled him to show up unannounced but what he didn’t anticipate was that surge of longing that overcame him once Jongdae pulled him into his arms. He honestly didn’t think he would miss Jongdae this much. 

Truth be told, this revelation was terrifying to him. Baekhyun can’t remember the last time he’s gotten so serious about someone, about anyone. It had been Chanyeol and only Chanyeol for so long… “Baekhyun?” Jongdae’s voice jolts him from his introspection. Looking up, he is met by a pair of concerned eyes and brows that are scrunched together in worry. “You’ve been so out of it, are you okay?” 

They were now seated side-by-side on Jongdae’s couch, freshly showered and fully dressed (Jongdae had kindly offered to loan Baekhyun a pair of track pants and a large t-shirt so he would be more comfortable). Jongdae had initially attributed Baekhyun’s strange behaviour to embarrassment, having gone at it like a pair of hormonal teenagers just moments ago despite being well past that age. However, as his uncharacteristic reticence stretched on longer than usual, Jongdae was getting worried. It was one thing to be embarrassed, but this was Baekhyun, after all, the same man who had once him off at the back of a dark cinema without breaking a sweat. 

“Yeah I am!” Baekhyun answers chirpily but then grimaces when he hears how croaky his voice is. Jongdae laughs good-naturedly and gestures to the tea he had placed in Baekhyun’s hands, which the latter drinks dutifully. He sighs in contentment after taking a sip. “It’s perfect, this is just the way I like it.” 

Jongdae beams back at him. “I know.” 

Baekhyun can’t help the smile that spreads on his face. He thinks back to what Kyungsoo and Luhan had said to him days ago about how he was smiling a lot more these days. His friends were right, he was happier lately and that had a lot to do with Jongdae. Kyungsoo had hit the nail on the head when he brought up how long it had been since Baekhyun had dated anyone for an extended period of time. What with being preoccupied with unrequited love for his best friend, he hadn’t been actively looking for anyone. Thus, the trajectory his budding romantic relationship with Jongdae had taken was proving to be very expected development, though a very welcome one. It seems almost ironic that Chanyeol, of all people, had been the one to introduce Jongdae to him. The more superstitious part of him wonders if this could be a sign that the time has come to finally put his love for Chanyeol to rest. But more importantly, it was a fact that Jongdae did make him very happy… and he seemed to make Jongdae happy too… and if they made each other happy,  wouldn’t it be nice if they could continue to stay like this and be happy together? 

Given his poor track record with being able to stay in a committed relationship over the years, Baekhyun is understandably nervous. Whatever he had going on with Jongdae had been progressing so well, the last thing he wanted was to it all up just because he wasn’t good at being a boyfriend. At the same time, however, he knew that keeping Jongdae on the hook like this was selfish—he either had to make a choice or let him go; and when he considered latter option, he couldn’t help but feel awfully upset. For this reason, he supposes that there really was no time like the present to take things ‘to the next level’ because the time has come for him to admit to himself that he wanted Jongdae to stick around in his life for far longer than “an extended period of time”. 

With new resolve, Baekhyun tucks away his nervousness and finally broaches the topic. “So…” He takes another gulp full of tea. “Kyungsoo is officially introducing us to his boyfriend this weekend.” 

“Oh?” Jongdae grins. “That’s great, I’m so happy for him! You guys must be so excited. Have you met him before this?” 

“Well I have, but at that time they weren’t… you know…” He replies, complete with hand gestures, before chuckling awkwardly. “Chanyeol has met him before since they all went to the same high school, but this would be the first time they would be seeing each other again after so many years I guess.” 

“I’m sure it’ll be loads of fun. Kyungsoo seems like a really great guy,” Jongdae says with sincerity. “I’m really happy that he’s found someone. Please convey my congratulations to him?” 

“We’re going to our favourite barbecue place. There’s going to be a lot of delicious meat and soju going around. It’s happening on Friday night.” Baekhyun is wringing his hands in his lap subconsciously and this doesn’t go unnoticed by Jongdae. “If you’re not too busy, maybe… you’d like to come? As my…” He looks down now, suddenly taking interest in the pair of bedroom slippers Jongdae had loaned him. “…my boyfriend.” 

Jongdae takes a while to reply, processing what Baekhyun had just asked of him. It makes Baekhyun nervous but he wills himself to stay put and wait for an answer… though his eyes inadvertently dart to the front door, his mind calculating the number of steps it would take for him to make a break for it if it turns out that he had just read the whole situation wrong and that Jongdae wasn’t looking for anything more serious with him.