Kai was holding my hand as we walked, and the feeling of walking all the way to Jongin’s grave with someone I love so much was something I wouldn’t exchange for anything… except maybe for the times that we would bask in nothing but silence filled with love… or anytime with Kai for that matter. Smiling, I started to sway our hands as we walked, and he chuckled as he enjoyed my childishness. And I didn’t care, I was happy on Jongin’s death anniversary for a change.

I suggested we stayed home and laze around when Kai asked me three days ago what I wanted to do on Jongin’s death anniversary. He was the one who asked if we could go to Jongin’s grave and I had agreed. And maybe because out of habit, I ended up cooking for two when I woke up that morning, and I only smiled in delight when I remembered I had someone I could actually share it with when I saw Kai sneaking an egg roll from the bag of food. He caught me looking at him and he quickly popped the egg roll in his mouth and shrugged. A chuckle escaped my mouth.

Kai fixed the blanket we brought where we could have our picnic by Jongin’s grave, I placed the bag in the middle and started to clean Jongin’s tombstone, placing the bouquet we bought at Joonmyun’s flower shop.

“Hi there, Soo! It’s been a long time and-wait, you guys know each other?” Joonmyun had asked when we entered his shop together, our hands interlaced.

We both nodded.

“Small world…” he commented and asked what we wanted to buy, I told him the usual for that particular day and he nodded as he started to fix the flowers.

Yes, small world indeed.

Kai plopped down beside me as I started to extract the tupperware of food we brought, I gave him his share and he started to munch on it right away. I fixed his crooked scarf and he smiled at me warmly with a thank you with his mouth full, complete with bits of food flying out of his mouth. I giggled how equally childish he looked.

And it started to snow again.

“I always wondered why Jongin decided to leave in the winter…” Kai said, and I looked at him puzzled as I brushed away a few snows that fell on his hair.

“Why? What season did you thought he’d be going?” I asked back, and he gave me a shrug. Just then a thought came, I chuckled at the memory, so that was how broken I was when Jongin died?

“You know…” I started and had a bite of the bibimbap I made. Kai looked at me in mid chew, and I quickly gulped down what I had swallowed. “After reading Jongin’s letter, I tripped in the middle of the road and the snow started to fall…” Kai’s forehead creased with worry, I chuckled. “…I called the snow Jongin’s frozen tears.”

“Why?” Kai asked; his eyebrows rose in surprise.

“Because I was crying so hard? I forgot really.”

“Why?” he pressed.

“My first love just died, who wouldn’t be crying then?” I was given a nod. A moment of silence swept around us before Kai was speaking again.

“You know…” Kai started, and it was now my turn to stare at him questioningly, a spoonful of rice halfway from my mouth, he chuckled and pushed my hand so I could eat the food the spoon had to offer. “…Jongin hated the winter.” My eyebrows rose in surprise. I didn’t know that.

“Why?”

“Because he knew how much you love the colorful spring…” and my cheeks heated up, I bit my lip.

“D-did he tell you that?” I asked and a nod was his reply.

“I love the winter though…” he said and offered me an egg roll with his hand. I happily accepted and he popped it into my mouth.

“Why?” I asked as I chewed on another egg roll.

“Because it was the season where I met you.”

And my heart automatically swelled with so much love for the cheesy man beside me, giving me that eating grin knowing he was now the reason I was blushing so hard. I playfully smacked his arm and shoved three pieces of bibimbab in his mouth.

“You’re so cheesy!”

“I know…”

I rolled my eyes and lips were pressing against mine. They were plump and slightly chapped, and they never felt so familiar until my lips were moving against them.

“I love you.”

Smiles were shared, both hands brushing off snows that started to collect on our thick clothes and jackets.

“I love you too.”

And those words never felt so real, and they never had such a huge meaning until they were heard from the person who gave you reason to feel it.

We were in love.

And we’ll stay that way today, and for the next days to come.