Hongki's Point Of View

After the awkward situation that had occurred just moments ago, Taeyeon decided that we would wait the rest of the time watching Tv in the living room. Probably because she started seeing me as a threat again and wanted to avoid being with me near our bed as much as possible. I shouldn't have played that joke on her! I didn't think she would take it so seriously!

I wanted to show her that if I didn't do anything to her was because I was someone who could be trusted, and not because I was afraid of being caught by the camera.I have respect for all woman, and I wanted to make her know that. For that reason, I decided to joke about it, but instead of getting her to trust me, all I've got was the opposite.

For the past 30 minutes, she had been quiet and avoiding making eye contact with me. I needed to do something about it if I wanted to get back that little bit of trust she had for me before I decided to ruin it. I need to explain her my real motives for my actions but with the cameras around us, the living room is not a safe place to speak outloud. I need to find a way to talk to her without breaking the bubble in where the audience is floating, but how? 

As I struggle for an answer, it appears right on the screen. A commercial of the new Iphone5 and how it makes it fast to send messages it's going on on Tv. I can text her! How couldn't I think of that before?! I bring my headphone out of  my pocket immediately, and start typing a message for her. Before sending my message, I check again for any errors that could lead to bigger misunderstandings and when there's nothing, I click send. Her phone rings and I just stare deeply at the Tv to not make it look suspicious.

Taeyeon's Point Of View

My phone goes off, kicking away the silence that had spread into the living room. I bring it out of my pocket and Hongki's name pops in my lockscreen. Without turning to look at him, I unlock my phone and read the message to myself.

"Are you scared of me now? Please trust me, I won't hurt you, I promise. I'm not that kind of person. I respect all woman, and that includes you. Here's my little secret, I'm too, and I want to stay that way until the right girl comes, and I think you aren't that girl. When I played that joke on you, It was because I wanted to let you know that If I don't do anything to you it's because I'm not a bad person, and not because I'm afraid of being caught by a camera. So don't worry and look at me as if I was your human pillow, okay? PS: Don't tell anyone about my ity, okay? keke", I feel ashamed for treating him coldly all this time, when his motives were good. I start typing a message to show him that I'm not afraid of him, and if I didn't speak all this time was because of embarrassment.

"I was not scared of you. If I didn't talk to you all this time, it was because I felt stupid for falling for your joke and not because I was scared of you. I trust you, it's okay. PS: I will keep your ity to myself, thanks for the unnecessary info." , I send the message and watch as he recieves it at the speed of lightning. Honestly, in this very moment, I was terrified. But it wasn't because of him, but because of my own heart. A moment ago, when he was about to kiss me, my heart felt something It had never felt before. Was that feeling love or desire? Since the first time I saw him, questions like 'What if he falls for me?, What if I fall for him?" filled my mind. But now, after reading his message, I know that I'm not the girl for him. But, one question is still there, and this question makes me scared: Is he the boy for me?

"Taengoo! I'm going to take a little nap! Wake me up when they come, okay?", He says with a smile, and before I know it, his head is resting on my legs. Hey! I was expecting him to sleep in the room, but he decided to rest in my legs?! Who does he think he is?! But maybe, maybe I should just let him rest for a little while.. He looks like a harmless kitten when he sleeps, how cute!  My inner self screams at me and without noticing it, I start to smile like an idiot.

Ahh, so this is what it feels when you have a boyfriend resting in your legs, huh?, My inner self talks to me and I blush at the scene I've only seen in movies and that I've always dreamed of being part of. So this is it, huh?

An hour pass and my legs start to feel numb. Now, his head gets heavier and heavier by every minute, and even when he looks so peaceful, I decide to wake him up. "Yah! Wake up?! Wake up?!", I shake him a little as I whisper into his ear, but when he doesn't respond, I decide to wake him up in the hard way. "Wake the up!", I scream in his ear and he jumps, and almost hits my head in the process.

"Are they here already?!", He looks at me with a sleepy and confused face as he stretch his arms freely.

"No, they aren't, but my legs were starting to hurt from holding your big head for an hour. I bet your head weights half of what you weight!", I say sarcastically as I stand up and walk around to make the numbness go away.

"Okay, calm down! How about you make me feel the same pain, come here and rest!", He lies down in his back, and points at his chest and I stare at him with coldness.  Does this guy loves skinship or is he just doing it as fanservice? At the end, I fall in the temptation and rest my head in his chest. With my head in there, I can clearly listen to his heart. I wonder if he is as excited as I am..

"Is it comfortable?", he asks and I think about it for a moment. Is it really comfortable? I've totally forgot about that, and focused in his beating heart instead. Honestly, it's kind of hard and flat, but I like it. I really like it..

"It's hard like a rock.", I answer honestly. 

"It looks like you like it!", he teases me and laughs, making my cheeks blush. Is it really that obvious?

"Shut up!", I say before the silence returns. Instead of a cold silence, I get a warm silence this time. The only sound that fills the room consists of our hearts beating at the same rhythm, and this makes me feel peaceful and less empty. I close my eyes and before I know, I'm unconscious. 

Hongki's Point Of View

 Right now, I was regretting suggesting her to rest her head in my chest. Doing that, was like opening my heart and showing her my feelings, and if she did understand them, she would probably discover that I was flustered. My heart was beating so hard against my ribcage, making it a little painful to breathe while she just rested there, like a statue.

"Yah? Are you sleeping?", After hesitating wether I should get her of off me, I asked but there was no answer. I gave her face a glance and what I saw surprised me. The flawless girl that appears on Tv, had disappeared, leaving behind a girl that drools when she's asleep. So perfect to many, but so imperfect in reality. But for some reason, this girl resulted more attractive to my eyes. What if she is the right woman? No! She can't! She won't stay with me forever! I don't want to fall for someone like that! I need to avoid that at all costs!

I turn to look at the screen and find her there.

That imperfect girl that smiles to cover up her wounds, just like skin covers up flesh.

Hiding the truth and replacing it with a lie, because that seems to be a less painful option.

Being a fraud just like me and other idols.

Because at the end, that's what idols are... frauds..