He wasn’t ready for the bomb.

If truth be told, Hanbin doesn’t know what to feel—to be happy because finally after three years, or to feel sorry because that means I have to step over my hyungs just to win, or to feel both at the same time because ugh oh my god what why why is this happening I’m not sure if I’m sad or if I want pizza or soft pretzels.

He can feel the tension rising among the other ten boys in this room, and in the back of his head he knows CEO YG is enjoying this. That basta- oops. Ha-ha.

But the show must go on. Yes, it must.

However, the evaluation is different this time. Both teams have gathered determination and concentration in them to win; the other team won’t let them get off the hook that easily, that’s for sure, because whichever group loses may disband. He can’t allow that to happen. Not ever. He’s got five lives in his shoulder, and he’s vowed to lead them ‘til the end.

They start to perform minutes later with Team A singing their chosen song. They’re good, he thinks. They’re always good. Mino hyung is a threat to him. They’ve got Seungyoon hyung, Seunghoon hyung and Taehyun hyung in the team—what do they have to lose? Seunghoon makes a mistake in the first few seconds, and Hanbin unconsciously bites his lips and eyes the man sitting at the center.

Damn it.

The team continues though, and they act as if nothing happened, and now it’s began.

Sooner or later, it’s finally their turn. We can do this—he’d always say, and his team never fails to back him up.

They win this round. Hurray to that, but there’s something else Hanbin is itching to do: see Hayi.

Once everything was over, the staff members (YG has left first, thank God) and the camera crew arranging and packing up stuff, he excuses himself from his team and from his hyungs and from everyone else and dashes outside. The other ten boys exchange glances, fully aware of why Hanbin was in a hurry.

He finds Hayi at the recording studio with Soohyun and Chanhyuk, probably working on a new song together or something. Seeing this, both Soohyun and Chanhyuk offer mischievous grins and I’m watching you looks at him before leaving the place to give the both of them some privacy. Hayi merely laughs.

When the two left, Hayi stands up, turns around and faces Hanbin, who, on the other hand, looks as if he's seen a ghost and out of breath.

“Are you okay?” Hayi asks, concern shadowing her face, as she watches him catch his breath.

“Something”—pant—“happened.”

She furrows her eyebrows, obviously worried and curious but she doesn’t press on him further. If he’s ready, he’ll tell her, of course. So, she reaches out instead with one arm, placing it on his shoulder, and she gazes at him anxiously. She slowly pulls him to her, and seconds later, he brings himself close to her, his head nuzzled against the crook of his neck.

He's sweaty and probably smelly but she doesn’t really care right now because she’s worried and she badly wants to know what happened but let the poor boy catch his breath first. Her hands rub and make soothing circles on his back, and his once stiff body has relaxed bit by bit, molding himself against her.

“We’re going to debut.”

“Well, we’re not exactly going to debut.”

Hanbin begins to explain while the couple hang by the couch, Hayi sitting elegantly with his head on her lap. Her hands unconsciously run through his hair while he animatedly summarizes what happened earlier.

“I mean, we have to win this thing so we can debut,” he continues, pursing his lips every now and then. “He says he’s going to call the winning team WIN, which stands for Who Is Next, and then the losing team might possibly disband. It’s just, wow, this is surprising. I can’t- I don’t know. It felt like life was flashing before my eyes.”

Hayi starts to hum.

“Other than that, I feel like I was splashed with cold water or something. The evaluation earlier didn’t feel the same like the last three years anymore. Everyone was tense, competitive—we all had one goal: to win. But it’s just, to me, it’s not just that. It’s bigger than that.

“I have five lives on the palm of my hand and they’re not just trainees. They’re teenagers, kids, who skip school just to come and practice. They sacrifice field trips and homework and average sleeping hours for this hell. They could’ve dressed in tux and attended prom or parties.” He frowns. “But no, they’re here because they want to debut. So if I don’t win this thing, if I fail to lead them to the end of the trail, I have myself to blame for this my entire life.”

“Don’t say that,” says Hayi. “You think your team would want to hear you say things like that?”

“And the fact that we have to compete against our hyungs.” He let out a long, whiny sound. “I hate that. I feel like we’ve become enemies or something, but then we smile and wave and say goodbye to one another, acting as if this was nothing when it’s not—ugh.”

She smiles.

“The weight multiplies,” he sighs, grabs her hand and plays with her fingers. “I feel like I’ve gained weight or something.”

She chuckles. “Should we order pizza?”

He fakes-glare. “Are you trying to make me fat?”

“Is it working?” She grins.

He grins back as he takes hold of her hands and places it on his face. “Do you know you make my days better?”

“Greasy sap.”

ew fluff ahahahahah