Chapter V
All My Feelings For You|| 8.25am Roof Top ||
The sky was a blanket of white fluffy clouds that blocked out the sun. Rays of light shone euphorically through the pockets of space it could find through the foliage of clouds.
Two girls sat aside each other on the roof top, one asleep and one awake. The girl wearing a brown paper bag was resting her head on the other's shoulder, fast asleep. The other stared blankly into space, lost in her own thoughts.
"가슴이 너무시려 Naengmyun Naengmyun Naengmyun~"
J snapped awake and answered her phone. She apologised profusely to the other party, repetitively saying that it was her fault. Being it the first time Taeyeon had heard J speak more than three words, she realised that J actually had a really sweet voice. The sweet saturation of it could even be likened to the goddess whom she so admired. That aside, there was a tinge of desperation in J's voice, even fear. The shouts that emanated from the cellphone was so loud, Taeyeon could conclude it was male.
"I need to go now, sorry." J got up and hurriedly started for the door.
Without thinking, Taeyeon stood up and grabbed J's hand, stopping her in her tracks. Pulling J around, Taeyeon threw her arms around J's shoulders and hugged her. For the first second, J's body stiffened up and she weakly tried to break Taeyeon's grip. For the second, J conceded and rested her head on Taeyeon's shoulder. Five seconds later, J broke the hug, and after making momentary eye contact with Taeyeon, she ran out of the door.
Taeyeon's shoulder was damp. Under the paper bag, J had been crying.
Rooted to the ground, Taeyeon could only stare at the red door that was swinging back and forth. Her mind was a whirl, she wondered what happened, wonder why she hugged J, and above all, wondered why J had been crying.
In the distance, a brown paper bag spiralled through the air carried by a gust of wind.
The rest of orientation passed in the blink of an eye. Taeyeon was too preoccupied with her thoughts to be engaged in the actives, she was caught up in her thoughts to the extent that she bumped into countless people while walking through the corridors.
The day ended quite swiftly, with the people around her revealing their identities, she couldn't help but wonder how J looked like. The only thing that amused her during the revelation was the fact that the husky voiced girl disappeared right after seeing the boy's pimple scarred face.
|| 12.03pm Taeyeon's apartment ||
Taeyeon decided that she would send another message to the goddess. A message a day keeps the doctor away! Or rather it makes air easy to choke on.
"Annyeong! Sorry if i sound silly, but what does atm mean? O: You don't need to thank me! Thank your talent ^^ And really, thank you soooooo much for replying my message, it means a lot to me! <3 -TT"
|| 3.09pm Taeyeon's bed ||
Taeyeon tossed and her bed.
She was above the clouds, all alone. All she could see was endless miles of pearl white clouds. A sphere of floating light appeared in front of her. There was a faint outline of a person, a silhouette… A silhouette of an angel. The angel held it's hand out towards Taeyeon. There were muffled whispers in the background, loud enough to hear, but too soft to decipher. There were so many voices they coagulated into a single incessant tune of melodious voices. Taeyeon stretched her hand out, but before she could reach the angel, the clouds parted and she was falling… falling…. falling….
A scream. This time, Taeyeon remembered what she had dreamt of. The dream seemed so real, but it was just a dream, wasn't it? At the beginning of her dream, she felt so right. So comfortable. The plumes of clouds
felt like home to her. Yet the way she had fallen terrified her. More than the fear of falling, she felt lines of pain shooting through her body, from her back to every part of her body. She subconsciously felt that being in the air was right, yet the fact she was falling disturbed her. It was as though she used to be able to float in the clouds, but for some reason she couldn't anymore.
Her dream confused her, she felt like she had to make sense of the dream, yet it was like she already understood it in the deep recesses of her mind. Taeyeon laid on the bed deep in thought, her gaze seemed to bore holes in the ceiling above her.
|| 7.09pm Taeyeon's bed ||
Taeyeon eventually pulled herself out of bed and ambled towards the kitchen, following the drool inducing scent of pancakes.
Sooyoung was in the kitchen, humming as she flipped two pancakes over. Behind her was a stack of freshly made pancakes. Stealthily, Taeyeon grabbed three pancakes off the top of the stack and proceeded to escape. Unfortunately, she kicked a carton of milk that was lying on the floor and Sooyoung turned around. She started to chase Taeyeon brandishing a spatula. Laughing while sticking out her tongue at Sooyoung, Taeyeon swiftly ran behind the couch and both girls circled it cautiously. Eventually, Sooyoung just jumped across the couch with her long legs and hit Taeyeon on the with her weapon.
Taeyeon was punished by being forced to eat the two charred pancakes that were ignored during their short scuffle. She prodded the pancakes with her fork, grimacing.
"But Soooooo they're black!" she exclaimed while pouting.
"It's your fault for stealing my food" Sooyoung nodded approvingly, leaving Taeyeon to finish the blackened pancakes on her own.
"I got a boy, meotjin! I got a boy, chakhan!"
Sooyoung re-entered the kitchen holding Taeyeon's phone up.
"You don't get it till you finish those pancakes!"
Pshhh, it was just a phone call. Taeyeon wasn't silly enough to eat burnt pancakes for a stupid phone call. Well at least that was what she thought until she looked closer at the screen. J was calling her. In four huge bites, she forced the disgusting tasting pancakes down while Sooyoung stared at her, mouth hanging open.
Taeyeon snatched the phone from the stunned Sooyoung and picked up.
The sound of glass shattering greeted her ears.
"Do you THINK, I'm GULLIBLE?" A man's voice boomed in the background.
More glass shattered. Thudding sounds. Objects being thrown on the floor. Soft sobbing sounds.
"YA! LISTEN TO ME!" The man roared and a chorus of hitting sounds followed. The man was hitting J.
Beep. Beep. Beep. The call ended.
Sooyoung's shock turned into confusion as she watched Taeyeon's expression change from happiness to that of anger and worry in a matter of seconds.
"Call Sunny for me. Now." Taeyeon managed to blurt out as her face paled.
Sunny was Sooyoung's unofficial girlfriend who had an uncanny way with computers. If you wanted to hack something. Call Sunny. If you wanted the answers for tomorrow's test. Call Sunny. If you wanted to stalk someone with just a phone number. Call Sunny.
After literally shouting the details to Sunny over the phone, Taeyeon was in her car speeding to wherever J was.
Please be okay. Taeyeon repeated those three words in her mind as she took sharp corners, cutting numerous cars and shooting through red lights.
She finally arrived at the building. Following Sunny's instructions and not even knowing why, she lied to security regarding which apartment she needed to head to. The guard stared at her suspiciously but eventually let her go on her way.
Taeyeon walked briskly towards the lifts, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. As the lift doors opened, a man stormed out, bumping into Taeyeon and without even apologising, continued outwards. Taeyeon ignored the man. Her heart was too choked up with worry to think about trivial matters. She didn't know why something in her chest hurt so much. But at that moment, she didn't care. She just wanted to know whether J was alright.
The lift doors finally opened at the 20th story. J lived in the penthouse, so there was only one door there. It was ajar. Even from outside, it looked as if a hurricane had ripped through the house, leaving little untouched. The sofa was flipped over, chairs were broken and even the table seemed to slant a little to the right.
The amount of shattered glass that was on the floor made it dangerous to even step into the apartment. Following the muffled sobbing sounds, Taeyeon found J sitting on the floor amidst the chaotic backdrop. J's back faced Taeyeon, but simply watching her small frame shake as she cried broke parts of Taeyeon's heart that she herself didn't know she had.
Taeyeon knelt down on the floor behind J and wrapped her arms around the girl in front of her. J stiffened as she fearfully tried to break away from Taeyeon's embrace.
Taeyeon held on firmly.
"It's TaeTae. I'm returning the favour."
Locking J in her arms, Taeyeon let her cry it out while constantly whispering soothing words in her ear. As the minutes went by, J stopped shaking so violently and the sobs slowly subsided. When J's breathing stabilised, Taeyeon let go and sat down on the floor, still behind J.
"I'm -hiccup- fine. You can -hiccup- leave now."
"You don't seem fine to me." Taeyeon furrowed her eyebrows.
Taeyeon tried to scoot in front of J, but it was almost impossible with J turning around whenever Taeyeon came close to seeing her face.
"I'm going to -hiccup- shower." Taking the greatest caution to cover her face, J hurried away towards the room with a bright pink door.
Seriously, Taeyeon was confused. She was worried that J wasn't okay, but at the same time she didn't couldn't figure out why she was worried for someone she had only known for a couple of days. She also couldn't understand why it hurt her so much to see J in pain. They were barely even friends. Also, why did J have to hide her face? It wasn't like people would die when they saw her face.
Taeyeon sauntered around the room. She cleared up the glass shards that mottled the floor. Taking a deep breath, she heaved, with much difficulty, the couch back to it's original position. After she rescued what could be rescued and cleaned up what could be cleaned up, the webpage that J's laptop was on caught her attention.
It was the blonde goddess' webpage. Oh so J was a fan too? It looked like J was about to post a comment.
"Atm means all the more! Doesn't it? Haha, i think it does! I'm not that talented, really. No no, thank you for continuing to support-
Taeyeon nearly fainted. It was a reply. A reply that seemed to reply directly to her question. A gazillion questions surfaced in her mind. Did it mean that she was standing in the blonde goddess' house? Jessica Jung's house?! On hindsight, she took back her words. People would die if they saw her face. If she was Jessica that is. She would die if she saw Jessica's face. She was choking on air and the air was the same air that Jessica Jung was breathing just ten minutes ago.
Her heart felt like it was going to beat out of her chest.
The pink door swung open.
**가슴이 너무시려 - kaseumi neomu siryeo - my heart is so cold~
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