~Chapter 41~

Searching for Answers

Taemin’s POV~

            Key hyung and I casually leave the Lunar Shadow clan after stirring up a huge mess. Arm in arm, we walk toward our horses and mount them pridefully. Let’s just say Key hyung and I successfully tore through the Lunar Shadow and burnt down a few areas with their supplies. Whoops~ I chuckle to myself.

            Key hyung and I ride our horse calmly, enjoying the tranquil night air. Key hyung and I haven’t really spent a lot of time alone. We usually hang out together as a group. I guess bonding with him is a nice feeling. I get him all to myself hehe. I look over at him, but notice that his once triumphant face is now etched with concern. “Is something bothering you? You can share your burdens with me if you’d like,” I offer, riding my horse beside his. e sihs He sighs and looks at the ground solemnly.

            “I wanted to go check on Minho so I can console Jonghyun hyung…he’s not really healing well because he’s full of guilt. I’m sure you also came here to check on Minho,” Key hyung confesses. “We are all worried.”

            “Yeah, I guess it was a bit foolish to think Minho hyung will be laying around for us to simply save him,” I sigh as well. “Although we thought it would be good to have Minho hyung keep an eye on the Peacekeepers, it’s just so unsettling. I just wanted to make sure he was okay and then go on with the plan. We can’t just imagine that he is doing okay…”

            “But unfortunately for us, the Peacekeepers’ hideout is unknown. This makes them a huge threat and a barrier between us and Minho. We can’t even find him, not to mention take him back with us to the palace.”

            “Hyung, I think I want to go see my master. He might have some answers for us. Maybe he even has some tips on what to do next.”

            “You think he will tell us? He might not want to since it messes with the future. Whenever someone who can foresee the future helps people out, it may change the destiny and that can cause some major consequences.” Key hyung’s words reminds me of what the master told me when I decided to heal my face… ‘Changing your face back will open the door to even more calamities. Are you willing to face the consequences? I cannot ensure anything in the future.’ I chill runs down my spine as I remember his words.

            “Well it’s worth a shot,” I say, ignoring the ominous warning. “You don’t have to come with me if you don’t want to.”

            “I’ll follow you,” Key hyung decides. “I don’t think I can face Jonghyun hyung yet. He might still be upset with me.” 

            “What for?” I ask, pretending that I haven’t caught on their tension. I want to hear this from him personally. Last time, Gun Tae and I were just trying to put the pieces together.

            “Honestly, I’m not too sure myself…After Jonghyun hyung complained about not being paired with me, he started acting coldly toward me.”

            “Wait, that’s it? He was just upset about not being paired with you?” I ask, trying to help him think it through.

            “I mean when he was upset, he was calling himself a fool and I just don’t know.”

            “Anything else he mentioned during the conversation before he acted strangely?”

            “Uhh…” Key hyung thinks for a while and tilts his head. “He said we were the only couple that weren’t paired up and when I questioned him, he got really awkward and left.”

            “So, you’re telling me you rejected him?”

            “Wait what?” Key hyung’s face shows complete confusion. Oh, Key hyung, Jonghyun hyung clearly saw you two as a couple and the fact that you questioned him shows that you don’t feel the same way and that he was just leading himself on this entire time…Jonghyun hyung called himself a fool because he was so upset over the fact that he thought you two had a special bond…Aigoo how do I explain this to you? I say in my head, not telling him aloud. I really don’t know if it’s my place to explain this to him…

            “Hyung, can you tell me what Jonghyun hyung is to you? How did you two develop your friendship?” 

            “Seriously? Now?’

            “Hey, we still have about an hour until we reach my master. Come on, tell me~ Besides, I never got the backstories of you all.” Hey, the White Masked Hero technically doesn’t know anything prior to Taemin’s death, so it’s not like I’m completely lying. I want Key hyung to talk about Jonghyun hyung…maybe it can help him see the truth.

            “Fine,” Key hyung says in defeat. “Jonghyun hyung…at first when I met him, I thought he was being a creep since he kept staring at me. I even thought he was Minho’s servant. Also, he kept rambling about things I didn’t understand. I mean now that I know he’s from the future, it makes sense now, but back then, he was nuts.”

            “I believe that,” I chuckle. “Jonghyun hyung loves talking too. I’m sure he was excited to have met up with you all.”

            “Right,” Key hyung smiles while thinking back at the memories. “I guess I paid more attention to him after I realized how much he cared for Taemin. He was always blaming himself for the tension between Onew hyung and Taemin. He also was so emotional. Punching walls, rambling, crying…I knew it was all because he cared. I was really touched at the love he had for the two,” Key hyung chuckles to himself. “I even went into the palace to steal tea to cheer him up!

            “Hmm I remember then we were with Gun Tae looking for Taemin and that was when I was able to see into the future. It was so scary seeing his body in the future. He looked like a corpse…and that was when I realized that him and I are from different time periods…” Key hyung’s voice trails off as he spaces out. The horse jerks a bit as it avoids running into a tree. Key hyung focuses again and steers the horse correctly and continues. “Then he comforted me when I was having flashbacks of my dark days,” Key hyung sighs. “You know all of this time, I’ve seen many sides of Jonghyun hyung and surprisingly, he always faces things with his heart. He makes sure everyone is okay and he torments himself whenever he’s worried. I guess that’s what’s similar between Taemin, Onew hyung, and Jonghyun hyung…they always seem to take the blame for everything and they simply are such kind people who want the best for everyone.”

            “Hyung, I have a question…”

            “What is it?”  

            “When you saw Jonghyun hyung’s future form, did you feel like you should keep a distance from him?”

            “What do you mean?”

            “I mean this entire time you’ve been saying great things about him, but when you talked about the reflection of his future self, it’s almost like you set up a barrier for the two of you. You’re afraid he’ll leave you one day, right?”

            “We are from different time periods. I would be foolish to think that my holding onto him would keep him from going back. The image in the pool reminded me to stop fantasizing the future with the three of them and it even frustrated me. I knew that one day, I won’t be around him and no matter what danger he would be in, I wouldn’t be able to give him a hand.”

            “I see…” I nod and stop talking. Key hyung must have held back this whole time because he’s been a spy for the king for a while. He got close to Jonghyun hyung quickly, but he must’ve realized that the two were relying on each other too much. He knows that there isn’t anything that is everlasting and that one day they too will be separate due to the time difference. I can tell that he really appreciates being around Jonghyun hyung…but I don’t know if he loves him back or not. I’d like to think that he does, but that’s just because I know their future forms will fall deeply in love. “So, what are you planning to do with him now?”

            “I don’t know,” Key hyung replies honestly. “I just want him to be happy with me again. I don’t want to see him upset, especially now. Minho is gone and he’s injured. Jonghyun hyung is going to blame himself more than anything.”

            “Well here’s a tip,” I say. “Jonghyun hyung really loves singing. Maybe if you sing for him some time, he’ll be happy.”

            “Sing for him? Never,” Key hyung says. “It’s too cheesy.”

            “Don’t knock it until you try it~ anyway, I hope that you two make up soon. I don’t like seeing him upset.”

            “Right,” Key hyung agrees. “My turn to ask you something~”

            “Sure thing!”

            “What’s your back story? I honestly don’t know much about you. I know that you trained with your master and killed monsters, but nothing more.”

            “Right,” I nod. Crap, now I need to make up a story on the spot? I never thought I need to make up a backstory. “I mean that’s all there is. My master taught me everything I know and I slayed monsters. Eventually, I joined the clan to help out. That’s it.”

            “Darn that was too boring. Let me ask you another question.’’

            “Haha, okay hyung,” I laugh.

            “What are your thoughts on Lee Taemin?”

Jimin’s POV~

            “Something wrong?” Taehyung sits down in front of me, offering me a fruit to munch on. I smile, but reject it, as I am too full of all the meat from earlier. Taehyung ordered meals with extra meat to share with us in honor of the victory a few days ago. Although he is treating us nicely, I can’t seem to settle down.

            “How can you be so happy now that Minho hyung is gone? Before you went on the mission, you privately talked to Minho hyung…don’t tell me you and he planned something.” His eyes waver just for a moment, but his face remains calm.

            “Things didn’t turn out the way we planned…”

            “Don’t trust me enough to tell me?”

            “Never,” Taehyung reassures me. “I told Minho hyung to protect the people of our country.”

            “And what was your underlying message? I’m sure you didn’t think you needed to tell him that, now did you?” I ask skeptically.

            “Honestly, they keep denying it, but Minho hyung is clearly the same Minho hyung from many years ago…I had a feeling that he was bottling a lot up and I just wasn’t just what he was planning to do during the battle. I just wanted him to know that I leave the people’s safety in his hands and if I die, I know that he will be there to take my place.”

            “So, you did try to die during the banquet! No wonder you were so reckless. Taehyung-ah, are you crazy?!” I stand up, looking at his blank face.

            “It’s his rightful place, Jimin-ah,” Taehyung smiles bitterly, “You can’t expect me to never give it back, can you?”

            “Okay, but dying it not the answer. The emperor loathes Minho hyung. You think he will give him the throne after you die? He can find another person to cover your place and the minute the king figures out Minho hyung is alive you think he will let him live?! He was charged with treason. He was to be beheaded that year. Need I remind you that?”

            “I’m just so tired of this, Jimin-ah!” Taehyung shouts frustratingly. I pause for a bit, bewildered by his explosion. “I’m scared of that throne.” His voice shakes. I pull my chair over next to his and lean him on me, comfortingly. “That throne blinds you. It makes you heartless. It makes you manipulative. Minho hyung wasn’t sent to death because of his crime, but because of that throne. It forced a father to sentence his son to death. What will it do to me? I don’t want to lose myself any more than I already have.”

            “And you think Minho hyung is going to react any better than you are right now?” I ask him, knowing how painful it is for him to hear it. “We need a good king up in that throne, Taehyung-ah. If you’re scared of it, I will be there to shield its darkness from you. If you want to abandon it, I will be the strength that will help you leave it behind. If you want to put all your hope on Minho hyung, then I will be the one to help make your dreams come true.” I embrace him. “I wanted to hear the truth from you, because I want to understand you, so I can be here for you. You can shield yourself from anyone in this world, but please, at least let me in.” Taehyung sits up and looks at me in the eyes. His cheeks are dampened by his tears yet his face is still emotionless. My heart drops as I kneel down, apologizing for speaking out of line. I should be beaten or even killed for such wishful thinking. I should have never thought that Taehyung regards me as his close friend. I am his subject after all.

            “The more you cherish me…the more you look up to me…the more pain I feel,” Taehyung says and kneels down in front of me. I bow my head lower, begging him to stand up. “How can I trust you, if you can’t treat me as an equal?” He takes my face in his hand and raises it to meet his. “Once you learn how to treat me more like a friend and less like your king, I will open myself up to you.”

Taemin’s POV~

            I tense up as I hear the question, “What are your thoughts on Lee Taemin?” No matter how much effort the White Masked Hero puts in, the void Lee Taemin left behind is much too large for him to complete. I bet Key hyung is concerned about the White Masked Hero’s feelings. Honestly, I thought Minho hyung moved on from Taemin when he started bonding with the White Masked Hero more, but I knew I was just making myself believe so to feel better about lying to him.

            Minho hyung’s ‘you’re not him’ echoes in my mind. The fact that the Peacekeepers’ fake soul fragment of me has shaken Minho hyung up so much, I should’ve known that he hasn’t moved on. The more conflicting matter is that I am Taemin and the White Masked Hero. It’s not like I can be jealous of myself, now can I? Should I be happy that Minho hyung fell for me so hard that he can’t move on? Or should I be upset that now that I’ve returned, I can’t win his heart? It’s ridiculous honestly. “The fact that everyone remembers him as a kind and talented person, I respect him a lot. Although he is gone, he left many things behind for his friends. If I were to compare myself to him or try to surpass him, wouldn’t that be nonsensical?” Key hyung nods and smiles.

            “You indeed are a wise,” Key hyung reaches over and pats my back. “I commend you for that. Minho is also an intelligent person. I’m sure he will see your heart sooner or later.”

            We reach my master and he shakes his head and sighs at the sight of us. Last time I came, I made him turn Gun Tae human and I even took a peak into the present time, making him worry. “Every time you come here, I don’t know if I should be happy to see you or worried for myself? Are you going to give me another headache?” He chuckles as he his long beard.

            “Master~” I whine and start massaging his shoulders. Learn from the best kids, this is called kissing a$$. I can’t expect him to help me out for free, am I right? “I can’t help relying on you so much~ what can I do without you~”

            “Ahh stop it do you think I don’t know what you’re up to?” He pats my head and I sit down in front of him. He gestures for Key hyung to take a seat and he obliges. “Here’s the thing, little one. I cannot simply tell you everything, as each thing I say can either lead you the wrong way or even mess up with fate has planned. I can help you, but if I help you too much, I will have to face consequences myself.”

            “We assure you that we will not ask for too much,” Key hyung says. “We surely do not wish to bring you any harm, sir. If it is not too much to ask, would it be possible for you to locate Minho? He’s currently with the Peacekeepers and we want to make sure he is safe.”

            “Of course you came to ask for that,” my master his beard once more. “Little one,” he looks at me. “It seems that you made some friends during the battle,” he says knowingly. I nod, thinking back at the dragons I saved. “They shall provide you an answer, but it will come with a price.”

            “Thank you for the guidance, master,” I smile. “When time permits, I will definitely come back with some maids and eunuchs to help you cook and clean around here!” Key hyung and I bow and head straight to the forbidden forest.

~Comments are loved~