~Chapter 8~

Face Your Fears

Onew’s POV~

I hold Taemin’s hand and stare at his pale face, etched with pain. “O-Onew hyung…please…” Taemin says in his unconscious state. I furrow my eyebrows and look at him. Why is he calling my name? Does he need me? I tighten my grip on his hand and touch the little scars that remained on my dongsaeng’s once flawless skin. I touch his scarred wrist attached to the heavy chains. I don’t know anymore. I’m scared. Taeminnie has always been a great dongsaeng. He’s cute, cheerful, and resilient. Jonghyun and Taemin have been with me through thick and thin, going face first toward obstacles to fulfil our dream of becoming a star. He never showed me weakness and never made me disappointed in him. But why, why does he have to be the one destined to hurt my Joon? Why is he the one that is labeled as my enemy? He’s my enemy, isn’t he? I don’t want him to be my enemy.

“Taemin’s only a kid. He needs you hyung; we all do. The Warriors can’t be the same without you. He’s scared, alone, and desperate. Don’t you hear him call you name? Even in this state, he’s still reaching out for you.” Jonghyun places a hand on my shoulder.

“Please, don’t…Onew hyung…” A tear slips from Taemin’s closed eyes.

“Look what you’ve done!” Jonghyun suddenly yells and pushes the shoulder he just touched. “You put so much pressure on him that he’s like this.” He takes a breath and tries to calm down. “I don’t blame you, but I’m so upset with you. How can you not trust Taemin? He’s like your brother. He wants you to live happily with Joon hyung as much as I do or you do. How can you think that he’ll hurt you?” I turn my head and look at him with questioning eyes.

“If you don’t blame me for thinking that way, then why are you upset with me? You saw our past lives as angels and demons Jonghyun! How do you think I feel about it? Yes, even back then, Taemin was trying his best, but we all said it was Taemin’s fault Joon died! No matter how innocent, how alone, how sad, how scared he may be, he still is going to be the one that ruins my future with my love one!”

“Aren’t we here to change history!?” Jonghyun places both of his hands on my shoulders and shake me roughly. “If you treat Taemin like that, how different would the past be? If you act like this, how different are you from a demon that separated us all in the first place?! If you treat him like this, ruin the SHINee Warriors, and be unlike the Onew hyung we all loves and respect, then I might be the person that’ll kill Joon!” He lets go of me in shock. “I-I didn’t mean that hyung. I-I’m sorry I’m just as frustrated as you are! I don’t know what to say or do to make you trust Taemin and treat him like how you use to. You’re distancing yourself from me as well. How do you think I feel? If you don’t trust Taemin, at least you trust me right?” I nod despite what he just said to me. I know Jonghyun didn’t mean it. “Then trust what I say. Taemin is your friend; he won’t do something so terrible to you. Please, trust me. Taemin needs you.”

I close my eyes and take a deep breath. What should I do right now? I open my eyes and look at the unconscious person on the bed and sigh. There’s no point in keeping this mistrust up. Taemin is my friend and like a brother to me. We go as far as three lifetimes! Taemin-ah, please don’t make me regret trusting you. “Please, don’t do this…Wae? Wae!? Onew hyung please don’t!” Taemin jerks up and looks around frantically. When his eyes meet with mines, he screams and backs up into the back corner of his bed.

“Taemin, you’re safe! Your hyungs are here for you. You’re safe!” Jonghyun tries to calm Taemin down, but he covers his ears and shakes his head.

“Get away from me!” Taemin pushes Jonghyun’s hand away and starts crying and screaming. “Leave! Stay away from me! Please don’t come near me!” I try to hug him and he starts throwing random items at us, hoping we’d leave. I stand there and accept his attacks. “Don’t come here! Get out! Leave!” He sobs hysterically and holds his head, shaking it back and forth. He whimpers and curls his body into a ball. “Please don’t kill me.”

“Taemin, please don’t do this. We’re your hyungs. Why would we hurt you?” Jonghyun glances at me. “I’m here for you—”

“No!” Taemin throws a pillow past his face and nearly hits Key and Minho who just entered the room.

“Out!” Key drags Jonghyun out of the room and Minho motions for me to leave as well. We close the door behind us, leaving the panicking Taemin alone.

Minho’s POV~

“I-I don’t know what got into him,” Jonghyun says between gasps. He’s is crying so hard right now, I think he’ll pass out soon. Key hyung tries to comfort him by rubbing his back. He must be blaming himself for Taemin’s actions.

“Maybe the beating scared him?” Key hyung suggests.

“No, he said something in his sleep that meant something else…” Onew hyung shakes his head.

“What did he say?” I ask.

“He was begging me to no do something, but I don’t know what.” Onew hyung replies.

“He also said something else…I just can’t understand.” Jonghyun hyung sniffs.

“What was it?” Key hyung asks.

“He told us not to kill him,” Onew hyung says quietly.

“Taemin seemed like a strong person. I don’t think the fight led him into thinking that you’ll kill him,” I say.

“It doesn’t matter why he’s acting this way. I just want him to calm down and heal properly. I want us to be friends again. I want him to recover.” Onew hyung says and Jonghyun hyung nods as well.

“Key, you’re great with talking, why don’t you go talk to Taemin?” Jonghyun hyung says.

“I think right now, it’s best for him to be alone. Maybe I’ll come back tomorrow and see if he calmed down.” Key hyung looks at the tray with cold porridge.

“He must be weak right now. I think I’ll reheat the porridge. I’ll be back. Key hyung, console Jonghyun hyung, he’s close to losing his sanity as well,” I joke and leave. After reheating the porridge, I knock on Taemin's room’s door. No answer. I open the door slowly and see Taemin curled in a ball, staring at the floor blankly. I place the porridge slowly on the table in the center of his room. “Eat this,” I say, and leave.

“He hasn’t eaten or drank anything for two days. If he keeps this up, he’ll die,” Key hyung sighs. “I didn’t think he’d be in shock for this long. I tried to talk to him and then he threw a fit again. Shouting at me and crying…I really think he must’ve seen something when he slept. He must’ve had a nightmare and thought that is was real or something.”

“What should we do? I can’t have Taemin die like this. Why is he doing this to himself? I just don’t know what to do to help him.” I leave Key hyung and Jonghyun hyung in the room and walk toward Taemin’s room. I jump up the roof and take my flute out. Although I didn’t perfect it yet and don’t have the song completed, I play “A-Yo,” the song Taemin performed to cheer Gun Tae up. I hope he’ll understand what I mean. We’re all here for him. I’m here for him. He’s not alone. He never was.

I hear a crash in Taemin’s room and stop playing. I jump down and enter his room without knocking and see him struggling to hold his sword. I check my face covering and step into the room. He sees me and tries to attack me. “Stupid assassin, you finally came back to kill me,” he says weakly. He swings his sword at me, but the weight of the sword is too much for him to handle right now. He topples over and I catch him. I remember what Key hyung would always do when he or I was upset. Maybe I should fight with Taemin and try to relieve his stress.

I pick him up and help him stand upright. He swings again and I hold his hand, guiding him to attack properly. I lean his back on my chest and help him fight around. I spin in front of him and hold him up while letting him attack me. Taemin’s body is weak and flimsy, if I didn’t support him, he’d be on the ground by now. I back hug him and carry him up so he can be on his two feet. I then release my grip around his waist and place it on both of his arms and help him fight.

Eventually, Taemin ends up leaning on me completely and breathing heavily, nearly depleted of energy. His sword slips out of his hand and I support his frail body. “You have to eat, or else, you can’t protect anyone, not even yourself,” I say. “Can you trust me?” I ask him. He nods weakly and I carry him bridal style, placing him on his bed. I grab the bowl of porridge on the table that Key hyung brought in when he tried to talk to Taemin not too long ago. I sit down onto Taemin’s bed and lean his body on mine. I blow on the spoon of porridge and feed him. I repeat this process until the bowl empties. “Did you sleep the past two days?” Taemin shakes his head, indicating that he hasn’t. “Well, you have to rest and get some energy back. Let me help you.” I lay him down and cover him with a blanket. “Rest well,” I say and turn around, ready to walk out.

“I-I’m still scared,” Taemin says, nearly inaudible. I turn and look at his frightened, pale face, and immediately sit down beside him. “Just until I fall asleep is enough.” Taemin closes his eyes and holds onto the end of my clothing, like he’s afraid that I’d leave him while his eyes are closed. I ruffle his hair, take out my flute, and play “Symptoms.” Goodnight Taeminnie, you did well today.

Key’s POV~

Jonghyun hyung is crying again. I hate it. I know it’s none of my business, but I just had to check on him! I knew he wasn’t going to be okay. He thinks he’s Taemin’s protector or something. Yes, Taemin is younger, but really, at this state, what can Jonghyun hyung do to help him? Nothing! And because he can’t do anything he’s blaming his uselessness and his inability to help on himself. It’s so hard. I want to comfort him, but what can I do? It’s already hard for a man to show his weakness to his friends once, but multiple times like this? I have to spare him some pride. But…how can I stay quiet looking at him blaming himself like that? I want to help him so bad…because I don’t like it when he cries.

Call me crazy, whatever you want, but I’m doing it. I know. I know it’s crazy, but I just want to make him happy okay? Yes, I’m doing it. I’m sneaking into the palace and stealing tea. What? I’m not going crazy! I just want to make him happy and maybe if I fulfil the promise about giving him awesome tea that he’d like he’ll stop crying and focus on the tea instead. Look, it’s not like I’m not trying okay? Last time when I tried to comfort him it was so hard to choose the rights words and I’m not planning to go through that again! Well, at least I hope I won’t have to do that again.

I reach for the back of my head and tighten the knot for my face cloth. I am in full back with my face covered. I can’t really enter the palace since I’m not meeting the king. I am a palace warrior after all. I’m supposed to greet him to show respect. Pshh, forget the king; Jonghyun’s tea is more important right now. “Who’s there?” I hear a voice behind me. I turn around and quickly dodge a punch. The person attacks me mercilessly. Who in the world is this person!? I try to see the fighter’s face from the little light the moon supplies.

“J-Joon hyung, it’s me, Key!” I yell and he stops fighting.

“What the hell? Why are you disguised as an assassin?” he asks me.

“I was just trying to get something…”

“But you were too lazy to greet the king first?” He chuckles.

“Shh,” I hush him embarrassed.

“Are you going to head back soon?”

“Yeah, why?”

“I just finished packing. I was about to look for you, but luckily you came here.”

“What do you mean?” I ask.

“His Majesty was very proud of me for leading the country to victory in the past war and he allowed me to ask for a gift and I happened to just ask him to join the martial realm investigation.”

“So you’re going to join us in the martial realm? Why?” I ask. “What, couldn’t stand being away from Onew hyung?” I laugh.

“Don’t mock me,” he blushes.

“Alright, let me get my tea first and I’ll lead you there. I’ll tell them that you’re my close friend that has a lot of talent and is willing to help the clan.” We both head to my room and I grab all of my tea. We wave the palace goodbye and exit it the fun way—jumping off the roof. What? It’s really fun! Don’t judge me~

“So, what’s the clan like? Any people against the king?” Joon hyung asks.

“Not from what I’ve seen. They’re really into getting better at martial realm. The Heroes don’t seem like they do anything else either than train the younger Heroes. It’s almost like it’s a training camp.”

“Have you met the clan leader?”

“Strangely, no, no one has,” I replied. “Well, all except Jong Kook hyungnim of course, he’s his brother.”

“Maybe you should get close to him to find out the truth?” Joon hyung suggests.

“I was planning to, but so much drama has happened lately that I couldn’t even concentrate!” I look at him wearingly. “Don’t tell His Majesty I’m not focused on the mission!” I say, although I know he wouldn’t.

“How’s Onew?”

“I knew you would ask about him!” I mehrong. “He’s doing really badly actually.” Hyung’s face suddenly shows concern and he puts a hand on my shoulder.
“Chill, it has nothing to do with his health or anything! He’s just treated everyone oddly so we all think he’s losing trust towards us. He even called out his dongsaeng for being his enemy. Like, who does that?”

“What did he do?”

“He has this dongsaeng named Taemin and he’s been saying—”

“That he’ll kill me,” Joon hyung complete the sentence for me.

“How did you…?” I raise an eyebrow.

“Onew has told me everything, from his current life to his past life along with all of his dongsaengs and me,” he explains. “Apparently Taemin is a threat to my life. They all believe Taemin is the reason I’ll die and become a demon. Has my angel made Taemin that upset over that fact? I mean, we are just assuming that Taemin will do something bad, but since they are all here to change the past…”

“Wait, what? Am I missing something? They came from the future?” I ask in shock.

“What, no one told you?”

“No! Minho doesn’t know either! They have always said ‘hometown’ so we all assumed that their home is so far away they live differently and have different inventions. I should have known! No wonder Taemin said ‘my time’ when he was giving Gun Tae a gift from his ‘hometown.’ Damn them, not telling me anything! W-wait…does that mean Jonghyun hyung is from the future as well!?”

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