It was a warm morning, I could feel it on my skin even through the thin white sheets that covered my bare top. I slept in today and it felt good to wake up without that impulsive feeling of haste.  There was no communal siren to awaken the men before dawn nor was there a man to drag you out of bed if you staggered behind.The quiet nature of solitude made me feel at ease for once.

I was then settled in my new apartment and worked at the auto-shop here and there to help out a friend. Baekhyun eventually took over the shop because Suk’s parents declared him unfit to manage such a business. They thought it would be good for him to go back to school; so there the punk resided.

After getting out of bed, I threw on a musty odored t-shirt that I found laying around. Then I got myself a glass of water to moisten my dry insides.

I soon made my way to the front door and opened it so that I could step out for a bit of fresh air. I closed my eyes as I began the intake of invigorating pureness into the lungs. Everything was just great.

I was content, not happy.

Minhee’s door was just right there, adjacent to mine and it was closed. My glance over to her side lingered as uncertain thoughts dispensed;  about whether Minhee was still inside or if she was already gone. What could Minhee have been doing on a Saturday morning? Perhaps a stroll in the park with her son? Or another trip to the library. My second guess would be more accurate.

I wanted the strength to not care, to put the matter aside and spiritually live a happy life. So I looked away and continued down the stairs to the first floor.But deep down inside, I knew that I wanted  to see her.

I headed to the large box that contained each resident’s mail in separate compartments. And while I was in search of mine, a figure barely passed the corner of my eye. How could I not recognize the dude? The same black hair, thin lips and small chin… the fool had a bouquet of carnations in his hands.

He’s here to see Minhee, I figured.

Just that thought made me burn inside like I wanted to burst into flames. I almost forgot that he was there. Not physically but he was ‘there’. Damn right, I was jealous.

He stopped and saw me as well. The expression on his face was of surprise and resentment. I could tell by the way he pursed his small lips and narrowed his eyes to confirm the individual. He was right, it was me.

I  temporarily broke the supposed  tension with a greeting of fake enthusiasm. “Why hello.” I greeted. I waved at him with the white envelopes in my hand. Minhyuk raised his brows and forced a smile as well but his was utterly revolting. “I believe this is our second meeting.” I spoke again.

“Indeed, quite the  coincidence isn’t it?” Minhyuk responded, looking chic as he inserted his hands in his pockets.

“Coincidence is if we were to be here for the same reason.” I responded.

“Oh? Are we not?” Minhyuk questioned heavily.

“Ah, certainly not.” “With my military benefits, I was able to acquire an apartment here. Hence,this is where I live.” I told him. Minhyuk gasped lightly and his expression of hatred returned.

We were back to this glaring game that he started. I had to admit that I was absolutely satisfied by his reaction, in fact, I would’ve  provoked him further but it was unnecessary and a waste of time.

“I must go. My fiance is waiting.” Minhyuk announced as if I didn’t already know. Fiance, scoffed. ‘Minhee’ was a much easier word to say. He straightened his shirt as if this was just a casual greet-and-go before heading up those stairs.. Even if he were to try something, I was considered a trained killer; I could think of a hundred ways to prevent him from going up those stairs but I’d rather not try it.

I averted my attention back to the mail and let him leave.

◊

Three consecutive knocks were on heard from my front door as I lay on my couch reading the newest novel I had recently picked up. I put the book aside and stood up to get the door.

I was greeted by my bestfr-iance, Minhyuk. It was kind of hard to get used to the idea. He looked indecent when I looked at his face. Minhyuk just stood there with his eyes on me and flowers on his side. He didn’t bother to give them.

“Are those for me?” I asked. Then he snapped out of whatever the hell phase he was in and extended the bouquet to me. He didn’t even smile, in fact, he was expressionless when he came to sit on the couch.

“Where is Hyunwoo?” He asked. I closed the door behind me and occupied the cushion next to him.

“He’s in his room, sleeping. May I ask what you’re doing here?” I questioned.

“Can’t I visit my soon to be wife?” Minhyuk took my hands in his and caressed them. I took in a deep breath and nodded.

“I guess. I just thought something might have come up.” I told him.

“You mean so much to me, Minhee  I don’t want to lose you. I love you” He said.  Minhyuk was looking me in the eyes but I wasn’t looking back. Why did I feel like I was lying to him every time I looked him in the eyes, like I was unfaithful. I didn’t want to feel that way, I didn’t want to hurt the guy.

To love Minhyuk was something I couldn’t do just yet.  

“Minhyuk.” I said and took my hands back and placed them back on my lap. “I want to thank you for taking care of me, especially Hyunwoo…”

“But it’s not enough isn’t it?” Minhyuk muttered.

“It’s not that, I just-” I tried to say it but I just as Minhyuk angrily slammed his fist on the coffee table in front of him. I was afraid that the bang would’ve woken up my son.

Because I was frightened by his sudden action, I stood up and backed away.  Minhyuk was breathing heavily and the way he was staring at me with bloodshot eyes. He was mad and I was scared.

He finally stood up and I was going to run to Hyunwoo’s room when Minhyuk suddenly caught me and grabbed hold of my shoulders. Minhyuk pushed me against the wall so that I was trapped between him and the wall.

“Let go, Minhyuk!” I demanded as I struggled in his hold.

“You’re mine, Minhee. Godammit, you’re mine!” Minhyuk yelled but his voice cracked in the end like he wanted to cry.

Instead, I cried. I cried because I couldn’t give him the love he needed and the fact that Minhyuk knew, it hurt me inside.

“I’m sorry, Minhyuk.” I sobbed. And just when I thought this was all over, he slammed his fist again but this time next to me on the wall.

“It’s because he’s back, am I right?” Minhyuk asked. I remained silent because I thought that  his jealousy was ridiculous. Accusations usually ticked me off, especially in this situation. But I think that the fact that I was being  defensive contributed to my anger. “Answer me!” He yelled and shook me in animosity.

“Stop, Minhyuk! You’re hurting me!” I cried. I tried to grab the vase on the shelf near me but it was barely in my reach, my fingers slipped and the vase came crashing onto the floor. soon, I could hear the cries of my child from the other room.

It was like a wake up call for Minhyuk and he suddenly let go. Hyunwoo came running out of his room crying and as soon as I saw my little boy, I ran to him, crying with tears of my own.

I saw Minhyuk stare at his hands as if he didn’t know what he had done. Then he looked at me with eyes of remorse. “Minhee… I-I’m sorry. I was just being jealous.” He apologized.

Minhyuk started to move forward. “Don’t.” I said and so he accepted that he’d done wrong. Minhyuk nodded and headed for the door.

As he opened the door, there was Chanyeol. He saw me and Hyunwoo and then glared at Minhyuk, who then looked pitiful. As much as Chanyeol looked like he wanted to punch Minhyuk in the face, he rushed directly to my side.

“Are you guys hurt?” He asked  and I shook my head. Minhyuk only looked back before disappearing from the scene. “ I heard sounds from my side.”

Chanyeol saw my face drenched with tears. I didn’t want him to see that. He shouldn't have seen any of this. I wanted him to have the idea that I was living happily without him, like I didn’t need him.

But at that moment, I felt like I needed him the most. He came closer and wrapped his arms around us. The warmth from his arms protected us like a child’s security blanket. I began to sob feverishly for no apparent reason.

“Shhh…It’s okay. I’m here.” Chanyeol assured me. Just for a moment, I let my walls down and accepted his company but I knew that it wasn’t over with Minhyuk, just yet.

Hyunwoo fell asleep in my arms and we didn’t take notice until Chanyeol pulled away to wipe my tears. We soon chuckled at the sleeping child.

“Your son sure is something.” Chanyeol said with a grin. I caressed Hyunwoo’s hair and then looked at Chanyeol. He takes after his father, I said in my head.

“He takes after me.” I told him the opposite.

Hi guys! I know it's been a while. 

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