I am writing again after some 2 moths of staying in the hospital. I am better than I was

before. Staying so many days in the hospital has weared me out and nw thedoctor told me

I needed to recover, I needed to go to the rehab. Ws that even necesaary? I don't want to

go. What's the purpose of going there? I would not be able to walk. I could not even have

my own child. I will never be able to conceive. Is that what I will be fighting against? I

don't want to...I..I don't...I don't....

 

The nurse said I was suffering from depression. I could harm myself....

 

What harm would I do to myself when I am already in this condition? My life...It's over,

finsished. What's left in it? I could not even enjoy my married life with Siwon, give him the

happiness all men, all husbands want. Before it even started, I lost everything.

 

One thing they all told me was not to lose hope. Hope...it did not exist in my heart

anymore. And they wanted me to go the rehab.

 

flashback

 

Shreya POV

 

"Your rehab sessions will start soon. Aren't you excited? They will help you live once again. You

will learn to walk and to work." Siwon was telling me. I did not respond. I looked at the cut on

my hand. It was still fresh and it still hurt. It felt good. And this was the reason I was going to

the rehab.

 

The doctor had checked my body. He said I was suffering from Depression and it would be

good if I went to the rehab. It would help me.

 

 They did not know that everything inside me had died.

 

"Let's go." Siwon pushed my wheelchair and soon we were downstairs. Lifting me up, he seated

me inside and the drive began.

 

I was thinking what had happened to our life after the accident. Siwon had not gone to his office

for around 2 months and he may not go for a few more, because of me. I had become

paralyzed, for life. I would not be able to work anymore, so I lost my job. Siwon was on the

verge of losing his, but then our boss had told us that he won't. And bad news had flooded our

lives. And the biggest scar to my happy, married life, I could never be a mother.

 

As I was thinking of all this, we had arrived to the Rehab centre. Siwon helped me down and

then took me to the head doctor. He briefed us with what all would be taught. There were

psychiatrists who would help me come out of my depression. There were other nurses who

would help me walk and train me to do small chores. Then we were guided by another nurse

who took us around the place. I was introduced to all the different doctors. It took some 2 to 3

hours and it was soon time to go home. Something important was going on in my head which I

had to tell Siwon. I had to end this.

 

When we were home, Siwon gave me something to eat. We had a silent lunch. When he was

about to get up, I called out his name.

 

"Siwon-ah, sit down. I want to say something..."

 

"What happened?"

 

"Siwon, I want to leave you. Let's have a divorce."

 

"What the heck do you mean by that? Are you in your senses."

 

"I have thought thoroughly about it. I am just being a burden in your life."

 

"Shut up Shreya..."

 

"Can't you face the truth Siwon-ah? I have become useless. I won't ever be able to please you. I

won't even be able to bear a child."

 

"Shreya..it's enough...now stop..."

 

"I will always stay a burden, it's better you leave me and move......"

 

And a hard slap hit my face. My cheek was burning with what he just did.

 

"DIDN'T I SAY YOU TO SHUT UP? DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?"

 

And that was when the wall broke. I started crying, he hugged me the next instant and both of

us cried.

 

"I am sorry Siwon, I said...I said..all that...!!"

 

"It's ok Shreya..I understand. Now listen to me. Whatever happens, I am not leaving you. It

doesn't matter to me in what condition you are. I will always be there for you and support you

throughout. I am always there for you, remember that."

 

If I did not get that slap that day, I guess I would never have come to my senses. I am so

sorry Siwon, I said all that to you. I promise I will give my best in this. But you have to be

with me throughout, as you promised. You will be with me right....will you...???

---

I am so sorry for such a late update. I had been busy for a while and I am still busy....!! long update for you guys...!! please keep up your support. My exams are in a few days so I dont know when I willupdate next. If I am able to update, I will surely do it, I promise <3