They say most of the time it is better to listen to the voice in your head than that of that faculty that beats inside your chest. 

For once in my life I decided to listen to that little voice as I watched her sleep.

God, I love this woman.

But I broke her heart and she didn’t deserve it. She deserves someone else who would never even have the courage to hurt a single finger on her hand. And I did that— not only her finger but her whole being.

Those were the things of the past but the fact remained that I hurt her.

I made her like this.

I made us miserable.

I swallowed the lump in my throat.

It wasn’t really an escape but I wanted to give her the key to her freedom— the ring that was engulfed in my palm. I had given it so much thought. I was selfish—we were both selfish.

But it was time.

Whatever the outcome is… it was time.

I love her.

And I wouldn’t get tired of repeating that all over again… in my heart.

Kissing her closed lids, I whispered softly, “Hyun, wake up…”

Her eyes opened and settled on me for a moment before her hands covered her face, “What time is it?”

“2:22…”

“Hmmm… why?”

She sat up. She knew I have something important to say. I released a tensed breath and opened my palm. Her eyes travelled back and forth from my opened hand to my face.

It seemed that she was searching for something in my eyes.

I smiled nervously, “Let’s get married.”

The moment of truth.

Seohyun folded her legs up to her chest and embraced them dropping her chin on her knees.

“Hyun… I love you.” I waited for her reply. My heart seemed to stop. I breathed almost raggedly.

I knew… I just knew…

Silently, she looked back at me and shook her head.

“I… can’t.”

It was confirmed. I could almost laugh out loud.

My world crushed.

“Do you want to break up with me again?”

She didn’t answer.

“Hyun, do you want another time… away… from me?”

She shook her head.

“Is it—“ The words choked me that they didn’t get out.

The ring slipped off my trembling hand when I saw her nod gently. “Is this your revenge?”

Her eyes widened when I said those words. Unable to process the question. Then, she didn’t answer as she held my gaze as if telling me something I didn’t know.

I continued, “Hyun, I love you, I always do but I’m lost. I just feel like I’m imprisoning you.”

“Or is it the other way around?” She finally asked, “Do you feel like I’m just imprisoning you?”

I shook my head, “No never, I don’t see it that way. I deserve it, the way you treat me, I deserve it… but Hyun, you are hurting me…”

Her eyes flashed right at me.

Surprise. Utter disgust.

“Hurt? Do you even know that word? Do you know what hurt really means? Hurt…”

A tiny laugh escaped. Sarcastic, painfully tiny laugh.

Her tears finally fell.

After all these times, I see her cry again.

I made her cry again.

I love her.

I didn’t want us to separate.

I want us to stop hurting.

“Hyun… tell me your pain… let’s move on… please forgive me and trust me again.”

She pushed her tears with the back of her hand but it didn’t stop the liquid from pouring out even more. She was quiet for a moment as if calming her raging storm. “Maybe you’re right. How can I love you when I don’t trust you anymore?”

I couldn’t breathe. “Is this our end?”

“I thought I could do it, you know? Every day with you, I thought I can just forget about what you did to me because I love you. But I couldn’t. Do I believe th