a/n: guys... you have been with me this far and i thank you very very very much!!

this is the last chapter and i hope you had a good time reading this, even though it ... XP

“Your life… in exchange for hers.”

Sehun’s hold on Suho loosened until his hand fell to his sides limply.

His life in exchange for Anya’s? Can he do it? Is Anya worth it for Sehun to give his life up for? Sure, he likes Anya. He knows he cares for her. He cares for the people Anya cares for. He must admit that to some extent, he might have been falling for that feisty girl who doesn’t know how to close her heart to anyone or anything and keep it vulnerable for everyone to break. He’ll admit that he’s on his fine way of being head over heels for that girl who has three kids at the age of 19, and someone who have threatened to send him to hell on the first day of their meeting. He will admit that because of that girl, warmth had started to seep into his ice-cold heart.

She’s one of the reasons he had found that something that makes him desperately want to get back to his body. To experience how to love and be loved. To live.

But is it going to be worth it? He doesn’t even know if Anya likes him back. If Anya had even thought about him other than being just another bratty soul who needs her help.

And besides, it’s his life. The months of waiting to come back seemed like forever. Suho had just told him the other night that he had already found what he was supposed to look for in order to get back to his body. Though his fate still is indiscernible, he found it. It was the bargain in order for him to get back.

Everything he had been wanting to feel again, the sun, the wind, the warmth… it’s almost at his grasp. Just a little bit further.

Is he going to give that up?

For Anya?

“If you give up you life energy, Sehun, she will live.” Suho said, watching silently at the conflict in Sehun’s eyes.

“How are the kids, Chen?” Luhan asked over the phone, wiping every teardrop that falls without relent from his eyes. “No, everything’s fine…” he sobbed. “Who am I kidding? Anya’s back in the operating room. Yixing said that it’s because of some complications… some sort of blood going into her lungs… I don’t know what to do, Chen!” he exclaimed helplessly. “What if she doesn’t make it? What will I tell the kids? God, I don’t what I‘ll do…”

Sehun watched as Luhan started breaking down again.

“Can you… can you take care of Mama? Just until I’m old enough to protect her.”

A tear fell from Sehun’s eyes, remembering the promise he gave Baekhyun. More tears started falling as he remembered the kids looking at Anya with those heartwarming smiles. And the way they looked the night before, as they huddled together and probably dreamed about having Anya back in their little arms again, just choked Sehun with a feeling he never thought he’d be able to feel.

“I’ll do it.”

“What?” Suho asked, looking at Sehun for confirmation, that he hadn’t heard him wrong.

“I’ll do it.” Sehun repeated himself. “My life’s a waste anyways… there’s so many hearts that would break if she dies.”

“But Sehun… you already made it! You found love! You’ll be able to live back again! Even without the help of spells! You’ll be able to get back! Are you going to throw it away?” Suho looked confused, and Sehun could see that Suho wanted him to live as well.

Sehun smiled softly, “But if Anya dies, the kids would be left with a little less to nothing. As much as Anya had been my path back to my life, she is their lifeline.” he looked at Luhan who was sobbing while talking to Chen on his phone. “Anya, with her stupid oath of helping everyone in need, with her crazy rules and threats to send me to hell… these people need her. I may have found love, but I can’t bear the thought of waking up and living my life again, knowing that it was in the expense of being selfish towards the same person who had helped me get back.”

Suho let out a sigh. “I don’t want her to die either, Sehun. But I don’t want to see you sent to the other side knowing that you already found something worth living for. If only it was in my hands, I would give you both your lives…”

Sehun suddenly hugged Suho. “Thank you. You’ve done everything to help me. Even though you’re such a fail.”

“Yah!” Suho retorted weakly.

Sehun let Suho, giving him a pleading look, “But please, before you… before you take me away… can you help me?”

“Whatever it is, as long as I can do it…”

“Can you help me talk to Anya?” Sehun looked at the red light indicating that the operating room was in use. “I can’t just leave without thanking her. I can’t leave without telling her that she’s so freaking annoying, making everyone worry.”

A sad smile appeared on both of Sehun’s and Suho’s lips. “I’ll take you to her.”

“Sehun?”

“Hey, ghost girl.” Sehun smiled.

Anya looked around, confused. “Where are we? How did we end up here? And hey!” she ran towards Sehun and put a palm on his cheek. “I can touch you!” she laughed. “I’m dreaming, aren’t I?”

Sehun chuckled, “Yeah. You are.”

Suddenly, Anya flicked his forehead. “Why are you here in my dream, then? Are you going to turn it into a nightmare?”

Sehun rubbed his forehead, “Yah! That actually hurts!”

“Served you right. You’re such a brat. Now that I can touch you, I’ll take the chance and get back at you!” Anya stuck her tongue out.
 

Sehun watched the playfulness in Anya’s face. He’s sure going to miss it. Every time they argue, every time they threaten each other.

“Thank you.”

Anya raised a brow at Sehun, “For flicking your forehead and getting back at you?”

Sehun let laughter bubble out of his chest. Slowly, he enveloped Anya in a hug. “You’re such a dork, you know.”

Anya stilled for a moment but relaxed inside Sehun’s arms. “Uhm… this is kind of awkward, you know…”

Sehun only hummed, basking in Anya’s warmth. He doesn’t even know if what he feels is actually real, but he doesn’t care. He’s only got one shot at this, he’s going to enjoy it while it lasts.

“Just shut up for a minute, will you.” he murmured in Anya’s hair.

Anya huffed but kept her words to herself.

“I never thought that meeting a crying girl under the rain would lead me to where I am today. I never expected that I’ll learn about love and life in such a weird way. Who would have thought, that someone who takes care of three kids but barely out of childhood herself, will be the one to open my heart and teach me things that I never believed in?”

Sehun tightened his arms around Anya. “Thank you. For showing me that there are many things in this world worth living for. Thank you for giving me warmth. For showing me that my life isn’t worth nothing even if I believed it was. Thank you for loving me in a weird way like you love your kids, Deer Eyes, Kris, and those poor lost souls.”

“Who said I love you?” Anya scoffed. She circled her arms on Sehun’s waist though. “Why are you saying all of this, brat?”

“Shhh… I’ve got no time.” Sehun inhaled her scent once more. “Thank you for telling me what love is. And teaching me how to love.”

“Hey… what do you mean you’ve got no time?” Anya pushed Sehun gently, confusion in her eyes. “We’ve finally found the spell that will help you get back. You still got two days! What do you mean you’ve got no time?”

Sehun smiled reassuringly. “Don’t worry, Anya. Everything’s going to be alright, okay?”

Anya’s brows were still furrowed. Sehun kissed her forehead to ease it away. “Promise me something, will you?” he murmured against her skin.

“Tell me what’s happening first, Sehun.” Anya demanded softly. “Why are you in my dream? Why do you sound as if you’re going far away?” she held him closer.

“Promise me you will take care of yourself and your kids always.”

“Please tell me.”

“Promise me that you will never let anyone else, like that jerk, Kris, capture your heart only to hurt you.”

“Please don’t say that…”

“Promise me that you will never give up on life whatever happens.”

Sehun felt Anya’s tears soak his shirt.

“Promise me that will continue to be this loving warm person that I’m thankful for to have met in my lonely life.”

He looked at her face, wiping her tears away as he gave her the brightest smile he could muster. “Promise me, Anya.”

Anya sobbed. “I promise… just please don’t go.”

“It’s time, Sehun.” Suho’s remorseful voice rang inside Sehun’s head.

Sehun reluctantly let go of Anya.

“Please don’t go. You helped me get back up again, Sehun, you can’t leave.” Anya cried.

Sehun couldn’t take how heartbroken Anya was. And now it’s because of him. He’s just the same as Kris. He took her heart, only to break it.

He doesn’t want to, he wants to continue having her in his arms and put back the pieces of her heart together, but he had to go.

“Live well, Anya.” Sehun said.

Before Suho could take him though, he took Anya in his arms again and landed a kiss on her trembling lips, wishing that his time would be extended for even a fraction of a second.

Sadly, it doesn’t.

“Goodbye…”

He’s found his reason to want to live again. But for that person, he’s willing to give life up… the bittersweet irony of life.

And he was gone.
 

Sehun: (crunches knuckles) you said you don't hate me...

a/n: but i don't!!! (backs away with shaking knees)

Sehun: but i died in the end!

a/n: yah! i haven't even typed 'the end' yet!!! there is the epilogue!!! (cornered)

Suho: i don't know, authornim... it looks like Sehun's a goner in this fic for sure... i mean, what else was there for him to do? he's given up his life...

a/n: not you too, Suho!!!

Sehun: prepare for your punishment, nuna.

a/n: (runs for dear life)