~*~Chapter 9~*~

~*~*~

During the following months were Luhan forced to go on meetings with different doctors and psychologists.

Luhan would tell him about his panic-attacks, bad dreams and about Sehun. And Minseok told the doctors about what happened at the café.

It took the doctors six months to give Luhan a diagnosis and Luhan remembers the day clearly.

Luhan and his parents were sitting at the psychologist’s office. The psychologist looked inside his papers and then he looked at his parents.

Right after he told them what Luhan had been diagnosed with, Luhan’s mother burst out in tears and his father looked at him with a disappointed gaze.

Luhan was and will forever be schizophrenic.

~*~*~

Minseok showed Yixing the white shoe-box that was full of polaroid-photos and letters. Minseok handed Yixing one letter and Yixing read it carefully before he asked:

“Who is Sehun?”

“Luhan’s very first boyfriend, Luhan is not over him yet so he is writing letters to him. But he never sends them” Minseok said with a sigh.

Yixing let a wide smile being spread over his lips. It was so cute that Luhan was doing this for a boyfriend.

“How cute” Yixing said and picked up another letter.

“Maybe, but Sehun was never real” Minseok handed Yixing a polaroid-photo.

“Luhan gave me this photo to prove to me that Sehun was real. But I couldn’t see him, so Luhan got a panic-attack and fainted. His parents took him to the hospital and a few months later were Luhan diagnosed with schizophrenia.” Minseok explained.

Yixing looked at the photo; it was only Luhan in the photo. No other person that Luhan. Yixing but the picture back into the box followed Minseok back to Luhan’s bedroom, were Minseok carefully put the shoe-box under Luhan’s bed.

“But… how about his parents?” Yixing asked. He still hadn’t understood why Luhan’s parents left him.

“Luhan’s father is a politician and it would be bad for his reputation of he had a schizophrenic son so they let him without telling Luhan about it. Luhan has been living with me and my parents until our graduation.” Minseok explained.

That was when Yixing understood; Luhan and Minseok had gone through so much together. Luhan will always have a special connection to Minseok, a connection Yixing never would have.

Yixing was jealous, he felt like he didn’t know Luhan at all. He wanted to be that person that has done everything for Luhan.

“We should go before Luhan comes back” Minseok said.

Yixing agreed and they left Luhan’s apartment.

~*~*~

Luhan stepped inside the apartment with Jongin following him. Luhan turned around and was taken by surprise when Jongin’s lips crushed onto Luhan’s. Jongin removed his shirt and Luhan took a look at his trained and dark stomach before he began to kiss Jongin once again.

“I love you” Jongin said between the kisses.

“I love you too” Luhan replied.

~*~*~

Yixing was sitting at the kitchentable with a cup of coffee in his hands. Yixing had through the past two years pretty much become addicted to coffee.

Kris stepped out of the bathroom, his hair was wet and the only thing he wore was a white towel that was hanging over his hips. The blonde, muscular male had been taking a shower.

“We need to talk” Yixing said and nodded at the chair on the opposite side of the table.

“About what?” Kris asked, but he didn’t ask for anything else and sat down instead.

Small drops of water dripped from Kris’s hair and onto the table.

“I think…” Yixing took a deep breath. “That we need to break up”

Kris’s eyes widened and all the muscles in his upper arms were tensed but he didn’t say anything.

“Our relationship isn’t good. You don’t love me and I don’t love you. You’re cheating on me and I don’t know for how long I can stay faithful either. Because of the ‘incident’ I lost my work as a back-up dancer” Yixing explained.

Kris nodded. “If you think that it’s the best…”

He sounded so disappointed and it made Yixing feeling guilty, but he knew that this was the best for both of them.

“I know that it’s the best. You are happier with Tao” Yixing said and walked into the bedroom.

He began to pack his stuff; he knew that Kris couldn’t stop him now.

~*~*~

Jongin inserted in Luhan’s whole.

It hurt as hell for Luhan and it didn’t get better when Jongin started to in and out either.

Tears were formed under Luhan’s eyelids and he closed his eyes and bit on his lower lip to hide the pain.

It wasn’t enjoyable at all and Luhan couldn’t understand that people would do it for enjoyment and fun.

Then, Luhan thought about one person. One person who made all pain disappear in a second. One person, who helped him to endure the pain.

Zhang Yixing.

~*~*~

‘Dear Sehun,

I have to tell Minseok about me and Jongin.

I had with Jongin tonight. It hurt so much and I didn’t like it at all.

Not until I began to think about Yixing.

Sehun, what is happening to me?

Love, Luhan’