They said immortality isn’t what it’s cracked up to be. You live forever and then what?? No one stays with you forever. You have no one but yourself. But then again, what if you have a reason to live forever?

I'm YooJin. And yes, I am a vampire.

I have been living as an 18 year old for a hundred years. For a vampire they say that’s young but I feel older than that.

Living everyday trying to control the need for human blood, that was pain.

My first kill was horrible. Mortifying. Depressing. Since then I vowed never to drink human blood again. Knowing that you just took the life of an innocent person was unbearable. Grief and remorse flooded me to the point that I almost killed myself. But for some reason I couldn’t. Come to think of it, was it even possible?

Have I ever loved? Well, that’s the worst part.

My first love, Minhyuk, I had to let him go. What’s even worse was when reality hit me and my emotions took over me. You see when you become a vampire not only are your senses heightened. Your emotions too, if you can’t control it, it will get the best of you. So I had to let him go for two reasons. One – I am a vampire. Second – I loved him, I can’t stand to think of the possibility of killing him. But then of course I can’t avoid that. Then all the more reason to leave him, he used me. When I had a first kill, I’m bound to have a second one right? Too much?? I’m a vampire and give me a break, I was a “new born”. Don’t expect me to know how control my emotions that easily. Plus, I was hungry.

No one was there for me. I had a family. The ones who found me, bleeding to death in an alley. They apparently saved me. Seriously? Saved me. I was living in hell more than ever. Still, they took care of me, my education. Well, everything. I’m still very grateful. I wouldn’t live a hundred years.

Through it all I had my best friend, Kris. I couldn’t be thankful enough. He didn’t know I was a vampire. He shouldn’t. I never told him the real deal. I felt bad for not telling him, but it was for the best. He still understood me and never suspected a thing and questioned me.

Sadly, I have to leave him as well. Don’t you think it’s weird, I’m 18 forever and he’ll age. Remember what I  said about your emotions being heightened when you’re a vampire? Well, I realized another thing. I don’t see him as a best friend anymore. I love him. I love my best friend. But I can’t. I might hurt him or even worse. I’ve been there and I never want that to happen again.They said immortality isn’t what it’s cracked up to be. You live forever and then what?? No one stays with you forever. You have no one but yourself. But then again, what if you have a reason to live forever?