Yes.

I’m alive.

Why did I lie?

Because…because after I almost died, I didn’t want to go back to Seoul and live my boring life again.

I wanted to venture out.  I wanted to help others.

It’s not like I couldn’t do that when I returned, but I also wanted Sehun to be able to get over me and start over.

Maybe I was only in his life to change him.

Maybe that was the whole point of me being in Seoul.

It took a lot of convincing from my parents but it worked.

I’ll be staying in the states while they go back to Korea to get some things. 

We’re moving here.

After my “funeral” they’ll be leaving to Korea while I stay here because I still need some monitoring.

I told them to have the “funeral” in the states because I know they all still have school, and I know Sehun wouldn’t come.

And if he didn’t come the rest of them wouldn’t come.

Yes, I know I’m being selfish…

I sighed before walking over to the little children.

I like it here.

“Noona!” I smiled before I handed out a lollipop to Jaesun.

A 7 year old boy from Busan with a heart disease too.

“Ahh~ Adrian, watch out!” I called out. Those few English words spilling out of my mouth as a little American boy ran into someone. He apologized before running over to me.  I handed him a chocolate bar before looking up at the person he ran into.

My heart raced.

It was beating against my ribcage, wanting to jump out.

Yixing.

You need to calm down.

I took a deep breath in before smiling and waving.

He looked dumbfounded.

He looked lost and confused.

I sighed.

Of course he’d be the only one to come.

“Noona?”

“Uh…” I looked down at Adrian who had learned how to use that word.  “Do you know him…?”

“Ah~ Go play.” I said in my broken English before he ran off.

I looked up again just as he hugged me tightly.

“Yixing…” I breathed.

“No-shut up.” He said.

Shut up…really?

“Are you trying to kill me? Us? I came to attend your funeral and here you are laughing and smiling. You don’t know how angry I am with you right now….I want to be angry with you now, but I can’t because you’re not gone. What were you thinking? Lying about your death?”

He kept rambling on before I interrupted him, “I missed you too, oppa.”

And he shut up.

We stayed in each other’s embrace for a long while.

I pulled away slowly, “How are you?”

“How am I? Don’t start, Miyoung. I’m not done talking yet-”

“-Aish, yell at me later. Aren’t you happy I’m still alive?” I giggled as I pulled on his arm to the children.

“Oppa—Adrian, Jaesun, come here~” They ran to me, “Noona~” They shouted as they ran to me.

“Adrian wants to know if you’re going to teach us now…” Jaesun asked as I patted his head, “Aniyo, not yet. This is Yixing, Adrian and Jaesun…he plays the guitar, do you guys want to learn?” I asked in Korean as Jaesun translated.

They both beamed before they ran inside and I dragged Yixing with me, “You’re going to like them…”

“Miyoung—” He stopped, “Why? …why did you lie? Why are you acting like nothing happened?” He questioned me before my smile faded.

“Not now…” I replied, “Later, Yixing.”

Okay, don't kill me yet, lol. This is horrible, I know, and there'll be more bad ones, but I'm trying, kayy?

I hope you guys like it though, I guess. Thank you for subscribing!!

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--Miyoung:))