This one... has a particular story behind it. Well, I got this story idea when I studied Cosmology theory for an high school astronomy olympiad. I stumbled onto 'Phoenix Universe' theory and yeah... got a quiet freaky idea who happened to be this oneshot. I wrote this one while I was being scolded by my mom for not studying and instead working in this oneshot haha..^^" Enjoy the oneshot! I hope you all like it! Help me improve more by commenting and giving me your toughts and suggestions!^^

A/N: Set in distant future

Phoenix Universe

Sigh.

I flop myself rather hardly to my bed. Fluffy feelings tickle my exhausted body. I never know tidying your own flat could be this tiring. No, that isn’t mean my room is very messy; i just don’t realize i have too many things. Besides, I’m too busy with Space Force nowadays, so i hardly leave the headquarters and go home, and i obviously don’t have time to tidy my place.

Well, now i have to because I’m called for an urgent mission. It’s not like I’m a very important soldier, heck I’m just a rookie pilot and low-ranked private, but all of my unit are assigned to this urgent mission. I don’t know what exactly what this mission is, but it’s about a rebelling colony near the Moon and they plan an assault to Earth, stuff like that. The details will be explained at the briefing, which is today, when we will start the mission.

Speaking of the briefing, this is also the last chance i have to do everything i want, maybe for the last time. Why i speak like this because uneasy feelings have been stirring my guts lately, and it becomes more prominent as the mission goes near. It’s not like I’m afraid of dying; death is an occupational hazard for any soldier, and death in action obviously an honor. However, there is just one thing that I’d never able to let go, even by imagining it feels more terrible than any nightmares.

Seo Juhyun, my childhood bestfriend and my forever soulmate.

Will you keep your smile when I’m gone? Will you still visit the library without me sleeping among stacks of old-fashioned books? Who will you lecture about healthy food and stuff? Too many questions linger in my mind and it’s all about her.

I glance at the framed portrait of me and Seohyun on the nightstand. I smile as i reminisce that sweet moment. It was our first date, back when i was still a space military cadet few years ago. It wasn’t an ordinary date. Why? Because our date ended in a library, a REAL library with printed books, not e-books or digital media.

At first i thought she was strange, but later i learnt something very special about her.

-X-X

I ran through the crowded pedestrian, occasionally bumped into unlucky people whom i didn’t have time to apologize at. Stupid disciplinarian, how come he gave me 3-hours detention just because i unintentionally scared a couple of other cadets till they fainted at firearm exercise? Blame them for having a weak heart! 

Oh my dear time off was cut thanks to those weak dudes and that uptight old hag. Went i was home, i didn’t have enough time to prepare myself for the date. When i saw myself in the mirror, i was no different with a homeless beggar. And to my luck, I was almost late for my first date with Seohyun. Just great.

So, i literally ran my life out across the street, desperately trying to save my first-ever date. Then there she was, fidgeting around and waiting for me. I felt bad for make her waiting, and i wasn’t so worth to be waited for, well if you judge from my appearance.

“Seohyun!” I panted, still out of breath from running. “I’m so sorry for make you waiting!”

“It’s okay, I’ve just arrived three minutes ago”

“Do i look...” Beautiful? Nah, there was another word more suitable and it was... “...terrible?”

I paused to take a look of myself. A pair of black low-tops sneakers, black jeans, navy t-shirt (which actually the uniform undershirt of academy), and ed light blue checkered shirt. Well, 1.5 of 10 points. Horrible, i knew that but hey, at least my hair was brushed nicely!

She giggled before replied, “You always gorgeous whatever you wear”. Then she linked her arms cutely with mine, “So, where are we going now?”

Oh crap! My days before the time off were full with stupid tests, made me forget to plan my first date! And not to mention the detention and my crappy look. Ugh, so much for my first date.

“Err... I don’t know?” I grinned dumbly. She stared at me rather quizzically. Panic and guilt filled me in as i saw her disapproving look.

“I’m so sorry Seohyun my days was a hell lately with insane amount of tests that make my head want to explode and i even got detention hours ago so here i am straight from home after detention and dressing like a hobo!” Wow, i blurted it all in lightspeed, it’d be a miracle if she understood it.

“Yoong, you don’t have to apologize. You’re tired and i understand that,” she said softly after hearing my ‘confessions’. “By the way, you got detention again?”

“Hyunnie, i swear this time isn’t my fault! Blame the weak guys who fainted just by the sound of training guns!” I waved my hands frantically.

She shook her head lightly before leaning her head to my shoulder. “I see... I’m not upset or angry so don’t worry. Take this date as refreshment from your academy too...” 

“Ah well... okay then...” I sighed. I felt guilty for not being a good girlfriend and unable to take her for a proper date, let alone a romantic one.

“So... where do you want to go?” she asked, clinging to my arms as we walked slowly.

“Hmm... Ah! Game center!” I suddenly exclaimed. I didn’t give her time to react as i dragged her to the game center.

My eyes gleamed in excitement as we arrived at the game center. But it didn’t last long as i realized in what event i visited this place. I mentally kicked myself for my stupidity. Just what the heck kind of person who made a game center as first date? Well, count me in, ‘cause I’d just did it.

“Hyunnie...” I sulked, head hanged low, “...I’m sorry for not even able to bring you in a proper date. I understand if you complain how unromantic me and our first date in future...”

“Aigo... you apologize too much this day Yoong. Besides, why i should complaint? You’ll always the best for me.” She kissed my cheek, making my face flustered. “Just enjoy our time and have fun! What about...” she pointed at a certain machine, “...that?” 

Starfight. God, this game reminded me too much of flight simulator in academy, and it got me headaches for days. Still i couldn’t refuse since it was her request. Anyway, playing with Seohyun is far much fun than simulating with another annoying cadet guy!

Just like i expected, it was very similar to the simulator but just much simpler. We shot virtual aliens and cyber-dogfighting against each other. I beat her with far higher score and i ‘killed’ her for five times. Not meant to be proud, but honestly i played with no effort at all.

“It’s not fair! You already mastered this kind of thing in academy!” she pouted while stepping out from the machine.

“You’re the one who wants to play it, then why you complain? Besides, I’m a space military cadet, so mastering this stuff is a must!” I ruffled her hair softly. ”So, something else to play?”

“...Actually, there is somewhere i want to go, but you would think I’m weird and laugh at me...”

“Oh c’mon Hyunnie, why should i laugh at you? Tell me, where do you want to go?”

“...The library...”

I raised my eyebrows. What was wrong going to a library? Reading wasn’t a sin! Sometimes i couldn’t understand how stuff in her mind worked. 

“Then let’s go!” I grabbed her hand and dragging her to district library.

Each district had its own library, and i was proud to say that District 18, where we were, had the biggest and most complete collection in YH-711 colony. It wasn’t like i traveled around all libraries in this colony though; i just overheard the conversations of academy bookworms. I wouldn’t deny it, since the library was very huge and compiled with vast collections of e-books and other terabytes of information. 

Seohyun dragged me through the library, to a rather secluded corner. I stunned when i saw shelves of old-times paper-printed book. I still couldn’t believe there were printed books in this digital era.

“Umm...Hyunnie? Do you really read ‘books’? ”

She was busy browsing books catalogue through provided touchscreen. “Yes and oh, here is it!”

She dragged me again past numerous bookshelves. “Wait for a moment Yoong, i’ll be right back.”

I sat on nearest couch and waited for her, but she didn’t come.

“Ugh...”

It was her voice. I worriedly followed her voice and chuckled when i saw her struggling with thick books in her arms. “Aigo.. why don’t you ask me to carry them for you?” I asked her and took most of the books from her.

“It’s your time off and you’re pretty worn out from academy... so i think I’ll burden you,”

I was stunned and touched at the same time. She was so caring to me. I was more than lucky to have Seohyun as my girlfriend. 

“...No... it’s nothing Hyunnie. Hey, I’m a soldier,so stacks of old books are nothing for me! Remember, i’m the mighty Him Yoona too!” I exclaimed as i tried to pop my right biceps out. Well, nothing happened since my arms were... umm... thin. Never judge a book from its cover though, I’ve ever beat a guy in a single punch!

Seohyun giggled at my childish antics “Don’t forget you’re a choding too!” 

I grinned sheepishly as i put the books down to the table. I was imagining how hard a librarian’s job in the past. Well, from now on i should respected librarians more.

Seohyun already absorbed to her book. Gosh, she was so cute even with her serious look. But, i felt jealous. That old book even got more attention than me! I scooted closer to her and s my arm around her waist .I even did some weird aegyo, but she didn’t flinch from her book. Was that book more interesting than me? I tried to take a peek of her book, but she read very fast and she flipped the page even before i could read the small fonts.

“Hyunnie, what are you reading about?” I asked sweetly, putting aside my annoyance towards the book.

“It’s about ancient mythologies,” she answered, turned her head and smiled to my face. Finally, she broke her gaze from the book and smiled for me! Ha! Eat that, you old paper bundle!

“Huh? Mythologies?” I tilted my head, a bit confused. “Why do you read about mythologies?”

“There is so much wisdom you can take from mythologies in the past,” she said while flipping through pages. “Just like this one.”

It was a picture of a bird-like creature, covered in flames. “Wow, it’s a firebird. Cool.”

“The name is Phoenix. It’s a mythological creature that been said live eternally”

“Woah, really? So it never dies?”

She shook her head softly. “No, but it rises back from its ashes.”

Suddenly i found an interest in this mythological beast. “Tell me more about it.”

“When the phoenix grew very old, it flew back to Alexandria, where its nest was. In the flight, the phoenix collected herbs and hays and brought them back to its nest. In the nest, it stacked the herbs and hays that it’d been collected. Then the phoenix started igniting its own body.”

“Wait a sec, so do you mean is the phoenix is committing a suicide?”

“No, Yoong. It burned itself so a young little phoenix would arise from the ashes.”

I nodded my head. It’d be very cool if you could reborn from your dead body. Umm, after thinking twice, i thought it was scary... and gross.

“Do you know?” She asked while closing her book. “I believe this world is like a phoenix too.”

“Huh? I don’t understand.” I stared her quizzically. “Well, how so?”

“This world is linked through endless cycles. Just like a dawn, always followed by the dusk. There is calm after stormy nights. Death is just followed by a new life, the rebirth.”

I raised my eyebrows at her last statement. “So, you think death isn’t the end?”

“No,” She shook her head. “Even this Universe is like a phoenix too you know. When it stops expands, it’d contracts and eventually turns into ashes. However, a new seed of Universe will emerge from the remaining of the past, growing into a new space and time.”

“Well, even in this 22^nd century, isn’t the scientist still couldn’t identify what is the Universe really is?”

“I know, but i believe it.”

“Oh well, i’m still doubting it.”

She pouted and back to her book after hearing my statement. I didn’t want us fighting over such a small talk. Or maybe it was something very important to her? If it was, i couldn’t help but feeling guilty. But what i said was the truth. Wasn’t when something ended, so it was the end and no more about it anymore? I meant, nothing revolved in a continuous phase. Dead person would stayed dead, neither I’d not ever heard about somebody being reborn again nor rise from a dead body. No, i wasn’t talking about zombies. So, everything Seohyun said earlier just... nonsense... Aish! I didn’t know how to explain it!

“Hey, what’s up with that long face?” I asked, pinching her chubby cheeks softly. She whined as i let go her cheeks. “Hyunnie, let’s take a photograph together, in our first date!”

-X-X

Phoenix, rebirth and this universe which bound to the endless cycle, all of her life philosophy which she believes to are very odd to me at first. To me, it’s all a bit skeptical and just opinions of people who cling too tightly to life and helpless about thoughts of death. But as that uneasy feelings build in me, somehow i find myself desperately believe in it and hope it to become real.

My rail of thoughts is interrupted by the sound of the bell. I look at the clock; she comes ten minutes earlier. Just like i expect from her, she tends to come earlier in everything she does.

I half-heartedly get out from my bedroom and open the door. I’m greeted by her sweet smile, but i could feel a tinge of sadness in it. Oh, how i wish what i see it’s not true.

“You come ten minutes earlier.”

“Early bird catches the worm Yoong.”

Oh yes, another of her life philosophy, which sometime i despise. Life as a soldier is very strict and it makes me tired; so i tend to laze around when I’m off from my duty, or whenever i got the chance.

I gesture her to come in. She sits down on the sofa, glancing at my weary state. “Have you pack things you need?” she asks warily.

Her tone of her voice just makes my heart sinks even deeper. Turmoil inside my soul hasn’t extinguished yet, her unease just making wilder the storms within. “I’ve sent most of them to headquarters yesterday, I’ve just sent the some of them this morning and I’ll bring the rest with me today. “ I reply, hiding my tiredness in it. “Wait a minute, I’ll take shower and change my clothes.”

After taking a shower and change into fresh clothes, i sling my duffel bag in my shoulder. Now I’m ready to go. I left my bedroom and smile wearily at her.

“Shall we go now?”

She nods lightly and laces her hand with mine. Her loving gestures never fail to melt my heart. It makes storms in my soul is calmed down, but the turmoil i feel seems couldn’t be ceased. Strangely, it doesn’t come within me. Feels like it leaks from the hand i hold into.

Seohyun, are you scared?

We walk down the street in silence, but that’s what i need right at the moment. I didn’t fear anymore about the mission, but I’m more concerned about my soulmate’s state.

“Hyunnie, you’re a bit pale, are you okay?”

“No... I mean y-yes.”

She never stutters like that, she maybe a shy and reserved person but she always speak with confident. This could only means something bugs her mind. I just hope it’s not my mission that she worries about. I gently squeeze her hand, hoping it would calm her down.

“Is there somewhere you want to go?”

She sighs softly before replies, “...I feel like taking a stroll in the park.”

We’re taking slow stroll around the park. The tranquil atmosphere of quiet park should ease tension between us, but truthfully the air surround us is getting more and more dense. Her palms are getting sweaty in my grasp. I decide to break the dreadful silence.

“Hyunnie... I think you’ve known I’m leaving for a mission today...”

She keeps silent. No sound heard from her aside from her somewhat uneasy breath. I’m about to say something when she mutters a rather blurry but still recognizable words.

“Don’t go... Please don’t go...”

Sensing her unease grows stronger, i fake a smile, hoping she would buy it. “Why you seem so distressed? Is it because the mission? This isn’t the first time i-“

“Just don’t go!” she yells at me, tears visibly hold in corner of her eyes. “Please Yoong... Couldn’t you just abandon the mission?”

Reluctantly i shook my head slowly, “I-i can’t Hyunnie... Defying an order in last minutes before action is a big disgrace for a soldier...” Facing the pavement, i hang my head low, scared to see her broken, watery eyes.

“Forget about your pride! What is the meaning of it if...if...” She paused for a while, before she bursts in tears, “...if you’re not here beside me anymore?”

Her arms encircle my neck as she let her tears flow to my shoulder. Petrified, my body stays stiff; my mind doesn’t know what to command. I know i should at least soothe her down, but i can’t. Mixed emotions halt me even to move my finger, but my mouth still parts slightly, mumbling a certain word too weakly.

“...Phoenix...”

She hold her sobs and stares at me with her drenched eyes.

“The Universe is linked in neverending cycles. End brings a dawn for the new cycle. Death delivers a new life. Just like a phoenix who rises from its own ashes...” I whisper, barely audible. ”...Isn’t that what you believe all this time? Then why don’t you believe the same to me now?”

“Yoong... now it’s...-it’s not the same!” she manages between hitched breath.

I let out sad chuckles, daring myself to stare right to her eyes. “I remember it clearly... You were the one who put your faith in and i doubted everything about it all the time... Now, why everything is reversed all so sudden?” I wrap her in a tight hug. My arms embrace her slender waist lovingly as she buries herself to my shoulder deeper. ”...Hyunnie, like the death of a phoenix, i promise whatever happened to me, it’s not the end. You believe me, don’t you?”

Before she objects, i silence her with my lips. She is shocked at first, but she eventually melts in to our kiss. Those trembling lips, calmed down under my touch, taste sweeter than ever. Resonance of fear and hesitation, slowly but sure are pacified under our synchronized heartbeats.

She pulls back slowly. Her eyes, glazed with remaining crystal of tears, gaze deeply to mine.

“I love you.”

Those three simple words are things i want to hear so bad right now. So beautiful yet painful.

“I love you too...” I weakly mumble under my breath. “I should go now...”

“Wait...”

She leans forward and gives me a peck. I caress her soft cheeks, saying goodbye in silence. Her hands
softly let go of my arms as i turn my back.

A lone tears escapes even before i take my first step.

-X-X

The headquarters is very busy when i arrive. Soldiers attired in full uniforms pass and by, technician team rush across the corridor with their toolbox or clipboard in their hand, and some soldiers that have just arrived and still casually-clothed, just like me, have some pep talks with others. Some higher rank officers scold the idle squaddies and order them to get ready for the mission. A usual sight when an important mission comes.

I stride my way through the corridors, occasionally greeted by other soldiers. I smile back at them, not stopping my pace. When i reach the locker room, i quickly slip in to my flight uniform. Trembles creep to my hand as i zip my uniform. I sigh inwardly, is it the evident that my mind is so wrecked? A composed mind is very essential before a mission, i feel very ridiculous. I couldn’t help it though, Seohyun’s hesitation are more frightening than any goddamned deadliest spacecraft.

However, as a soldier, it’s my duty to do the best in action. So i recompose myself as best as possible and walk away across the long corridors. The insignia of my unit is exposed proudly in the corridor, along with other units. I hardly take notice of it until today.

A phoenix soaring to the heaven, stars lies gracefully above its head. Its beautiful plumes hover above an elegant torch which embedded with a ribbon, Latin words written in there which means ‘Protecting lives among stars, through endless chain of life’.

I never realized my life is much related to the concepts of cycle of life of the phoenix. I hope this is the evident that shows all of it is true. Please, let it to be true, i can’t fail Seohyun now and forever.

Desperation makes time goes fast. I find myself already in front of the briefing room. It looks like i’m the last who arrived before the mission leader. Quickly i position myself in the line, right before Captain Nichkhun Horvejkul enters the room and starts the briefing.

“Good afternoon soldiers, i am Captain Nichkhun Horvejkul and i am in the charge of the mission. The background of our mission today is...”

Next thing i know is there is a kind of friction between the Earth and LC-122, the rebelling colony, about governmental thingies, the argument continues and... you know the rest. It’s all pure politics. Tsk, everything i know is just flying battle spacecraft, demolishing enemies and other military stuff. All of these talks are rubbish.

Earth, huh? A sense of nostalgia sweep on me. The planet where all of our ancestors live. I was born there too, South Korea to be exact, before my family moves to this colony. Lots of people decide to live in the colonies that lie across the Solar System though, just like my family. It’s not like Earth isn’t habitable anymore. Tell you what, technologies in Earth are much advanced than in any colonies. Even the scientist had been succeed making artificial atmosphere to cover the damage from 21^st-century’s global warming catastrophe. Now the thing is, Earth becomes too overpopulated and it makes everything difficult, administration for example. So, lots of people decide to seek new opportunity through the new life in the colonies.

Aren’t these are similar to the finale of a phoenix? I’ll fly to orbit of the Earth, my birthplace, like a phoenix flies back to its nest in Alexandria. When the phoenix stacks herbs and hays before ignites itself, I’ll prepare myself for the battle. Everything that will happen to me next, it’s my point where the phoenix burns its own body. And I’ll start the cycle again, just like the young firebird rises from the ash.

“Private Im Yoona, you seem do not really pay attention.”

I straighten my back, a bit startled. “I apologize for my unruly manner sir!”

Finally the seemingly forever briefing is over. We immediately go to the respective hangar. I wear my helmet and stepping in slowly. Before i turn the machine on, i take a deep breath and let it out softly. Hyunnie, please believe in me and wait for me at the next cycle. 

We blast off from the hangar and fly through the space. In minutes we leave Mars orbit and start heading to Earth. Fear and panic, the essentials of a war, the depiction of Mars himself, neither i feel them. An unordinary situation even for the best, bravest soldiers. However, instead of those, something stirs my guts that made me much more troubled.

Seohyun, still you doubt it? The phoenix? The endless cycle? Chain links who bind this Universe together? Still you doubt me?

“Gamma Tauri, you are out of the formation. Please back to the formation immediately.”

I quickly end my pondering and fly back to the formation. Minutes later, we reach our destination, the Moon orbit, and form our battle formation. The battle formation is divided to three teams, Team Orion, Taurus and Pegasus, each consist of eight spacecraft. We stay vigilant, waiting until the enemies are in attack range.

Firstly, Team Orion launch an attack to scatters enemies out of formation. Then Team Taurus and Team Pegasus attack both of the sides and lure them to shift away, thus divide them into three smaller and obviously more vulnerable groups. My teammates and I fly further, dragging them away from the rest of their troops.

It’s difficult to defeat them since we and our opponents are using same battle spacecraft, and just like our force they have energy field armor shield them. But thanks to our solid teamwork we successfully destroy a couple of enemies and leave the rest defenseless. The remaining troops disband, shifting to swift individual-attack tactics.

I chase after two spacecraft. It should be an easy feat since their armor has been destroyed, but their twin-maneuver counterattacks force me to evade while attempting to assault them. When I’m trying to lock one of them, I’m caught off-guard and a laser beam shot hit my spacecraft. Thankfully I’m still got my armor on full power, but it wouldn’t be good if this continues like this.

After hard minutes of shooting and evading, finally i crush them to nothing but ashes. However, it comes with a price i have to pay. I’ve fought sloppily that my evasion often not in right timing, and i end up getting hit by quite numerous shots. True that i got strong energy field armor with me, but struggling against two of them obviously double the damage I’ve taken, resulting to a badly tattered armor. Well, at least i get rid of them in short time, besides my armor will restored after a rather long cooldown time.

“Gamma Tauri to Alpha Tauri, reporting sector seven has been seized. Repeat, Gamma Tauri to Alpha Tauri, reporting sector seven has been seized,” I report to my team’s commander.

“Alpha Tauri to Gamma Tauri, your report has been accepted. Good job soldier- Gamma Tauri look out! There is an enemy in attack range!”

Startled by the caution, i quickly spot the enemy and launch a pre-emptive attack. Eventough i successfully get rid of it, right before it’s destroyed the enemy has launched a missile and i don’t realize my position has been locked before. In this very close proximity, it’s a point-blank shoot, even i try to escape i wouldn’t make it. Depending on my armor is also useless, the energy field is crippled too much to hold any damage anymore.

So, i think now it’s the point my ignition then. This is the part of my cycle; I’d never able to avoid it. Closing my eyes slowly, i wait it happens.

Deafening crash blasts through the vacuum, but it’s like a soothing music in my ears. Heat burns every inch of my skin, while my body feels peacefully warm. My chest tightens from lacking air, as my soul is eased from any weight. Everything flows very slowly to me, slower than a falling feather.

White. Everything goes white. Nothing in my vision but white. So, is this death?

Far beyond the white background, i could see a flicker of fire. The flame slowly goes nearer and grows bigger. Somehow this feels familiar. The flickering flames, it’s like a pair of crimson wings flapping closer to me. And soon i realize what that is.

The Phoenix.

The crimson bird now hovers in front of me with majestic red feathers move slowly, creating soft gust of air. Fire trail behind its colorful, long plumes. Its eyes, calmly sparkling, gazes right to my eyes, as if talking right to my soul in silent. Right at that moment, i know the firebird comes for me. My time has come, and the phoenix is here to take me.

I reach my hand, faintly mutter, “Would you bring me with you then?”

As if hearing my whisper, the ethereal avian spread its wings widely and placed its talons to my arm in soft grasp. Then a bright flame erupts followed by a melodious, loud cry.

Take me, o mighty phoenix, to the end. So i can begin the next circle.

Take my soul, o mighty phoenix, to her who trusts her soul to me. So she’ll know i always with her.

Take my heart, o mighty phoenix, to her who gives her heart for me. So i never stop showering her with my love.

Seohyun, we will meet again, in the dawn of the new cycle.

I promise.

-X-X-

Well, for you who didn't understand what 'Phoenix Universe' is, basically it's a theory that states our universe is expanding to a certain limit, then it contracts back until the universe collapses. Eventually, a 'seed' will emerge from the remaining of universe to start another new one. Honestly, it's a bit nonsense for me, and I believe expanding universe theory is much more sensible.

Thank you for reading! Please leave some comeents so I could write better!