Later that evening, in our room, Chanelle, who was obviously a little perturbed with me in regards to my behavior earlier, was making our room a little unbearable to stay in.

“Um. I’m going to go for a walk.” I quietly said while grabbing my sweater and room key.

“Alright. Just be sure to stick to the hotel grounds and don’t go too far.”  I smiled and nodded.

No matter how mad she was at me for ruining her night with cute boys, Chanelle was still concerned about me. That had to mean something.

As I exited the elevator and walked into the hotel lobby, I noticed a group of people sitting in the far corner. I walked past the front desk, momentarily catching a part of their conversation:

“Can you even believe she did that to Ji Hoo? So little class.” One woman remarked and another chimed in:

“I hope he presses charges; they have gone through enough without having some disrespectful American doing as she pleases.”

I cringed at their remarks as I quickly exited the lobby. I cringed…but not because I thought he didn’t deserve it, but because I realized at that moment, that perhaps my impression, as a foreigner, had been a bit brash and irresponsible. I mean, I’ve never really much cared about what people thought of me, but I can sympathize with Chanelle’s a bit…after all, this affects her as well.

It was dark by the time I ended up outside, but the hotel was lit up plentifully. In distance I could hear the ocean crashing against the beach, and the wind rustling through the trees. Jeju Island is magnificently fragrant. The salt water, the foliage; it all mixes with the wind and comes together to make a refreshing elixir of tropical elegance.  Just taking a walk was a peace inducing experience…and exactly what I needed. I decided to stray a bit from the grounds and chase the moon. I ended up on a grassy plane, overlooking the beach. I sat down for a moment to soak up my environment and some more of my thoughts.

It was at this time that a revelation of epic proportions: Ji Yung. Ji Yung was Ji Hoo’s little sister. I could see Ji Yung again! I got excited rather quickly, and then it hit me that I hadn’t realized how much I’d missed her. How much I had wanted to know if she was okay. I wanted to see her again. Excited at the prospect, I started to run back towards the hotel. Not 5 seconds after taking off, though, I tripped over something in the road.

I hit the pavement knee first. Ouch. I sort of laid on the pavement for a moment, trying to brush off the sting of the scrape on my knee.

“Excuse me, are you okay?” I heard a male voice ask.

I turned around quickly, my face still cringing from the pain. “Oh I’m fine, really. It’s okay.”

He approached me quickly, came up behind me and helped me stand up.

I turned around a little embarrassed, and then bowed.  As I came up from my bow and got a good look at his face, I felt my heart stop.

“God, are you always so clumsy?”

It was Ji Hoo. I turned my head in disgust and then defiantly announced something about me not being so clumsy.

“Well, you must understand my concern…” he said defiantly, “So far tonight, you’ve managed to drop a piece of cake on my face and now you’re tripping on things.”

Well. That’s an interesting turn of words, I thought to myself.   And then I realized that I should probably apologize for earlier….

“Look, Park Ji Hoo, I just…” I stuttered, a little annoyed with myself for apologizing, but I mean, he did help me up.

“…I just wanted to say I’m…so…sorry about earlier.”

Ji Hoo grinned and leaned in towards me.

“Well, that’s a shame, “he started, “because I was really looking to actually knowing someone almost as stubborn as me.”

Confused a little bit, I continued on: “This doesn’t mean I’m not stubborn. It just means I realize that I overreacted and I wanted to take this opportunity to apologize…and to thank you for helping me up.”

Ji Hoo nodded in agreement, and then said goodbye, but as he walked away, I’d remembered Ji Yung. This would be the perfect time to ask him…since he seemed to be in a…relatively decent mood.

“Ji Hoo!” I called out, jogging towards him. Of course he didn’t acknowledge me…or stop walking, he just continued on, waiting for me to catch up. I passed him and then turned to face him. He stopped walking, looking more annoyed than ever.

“Did you remember something else you have to apologize for?”

Smug bastard. I remained focused, though.

“Ji Yung. How is she?!” Ji Hoo’s smugness quickly changed to concern. I could clearly see it on his face.

“How do you even---“ Ji Hoo looked at me even more intently than before.

“Nevermind,” he continued, “My sister is fine. I’m not sure how you know her, but I’d appreciate if you didn’t bring her up again.” He continued walking again.

I pursued Ji Hoo, now even more curious about this than before…and still intent on seeing her, I pushed the subject.

“Didn’t your dad tell you?”

He stopped and furrowed his brow at me; obviously this was another sore subject. Apparently, I have a talent for pissing this guy off.

“What was my father supposed to tell me?”

I was in shock for a moment, and then I remembered my meeting with Park Jae Hwa…..I should have not been so surprised he didn’t know. I quickly summarized how I met Ji Yung initially. I talked to him about the meeting with his father, and about how Ji Yung had just been taken away with little notice and that I was curious as to how she was doing.

Ji Hoo all of a sudden became defensive.

“Look. Obviously you’ve been paid for your troubles. That should be enough. I’m sorry we don’t have any more money to give you. Please stop asking about my sister and bringing old scandals up.”

I was beginning to get angry. “Ji Hoo, I’m not asking for money. Did you hear me ask for money? I’m asking about your sister. We spent a lot of time in the hospital together. I’ve really missed her and I’ve tried to stop thinking about her, but I can’t. I just want to see her again…that’s it. I don’t want anything from you or your dad.  We just…bonded…and I want to see her.”

“I’m afraid that won’t be possible.” He shot back.

I shook my head in disbelief. I was legitimately concerned for his sister; concerned for her welfare. I wanted to see her again and I needed him to believe me for it to happen, so I pressed on.

“Ji Hoo, please. I understand that this may seem like a strange request but I did get hit by a car for her, okay? I picked her up and stood in front of a moving car to save her. I can’t even begin to….”

I started to cry as the memories came washing over me.  I looked down at my feet, raised my head and continued on:

“…there are no words that can accurately convey my sincere concern for her. I just want to see her again.”

Ji Hoo’s expression was stagnant, as was the conversation. Before he replied, I knew that my request had fallen on deaf ears.

“My sister is just fine. She’s been fine without you for these past few months, she will continue to be fine without you. Now, if you’ll excuse me. “

I can’t describe the twinge of pain I felt when he said that to me. Ji Hoo pushed past me, and quickly walked to the hotel. I, on the other hand, stood there, alone, with tears streaming down my face. I gathered some strength to walk back onto the grass off the sidewalk. I found a bench overlooking a garden of sorts and just sat in silence.

“This is karma,” I thought to myself.

Karma for my selective temper. But the more I thought about it, the more angry I felt towards Ji Hoo. He couldn’t even remotely empathize with me and what’d I’d been through.

Like father, like son, I suppose.

The rest of our vacation on Jeju Island was relatively quiet. Chanelle, who had become quite fond of Anthony, spent a great deal of time with him, which left me some time to think.  Which, in hindsight, was probably a very bad thing. I quietly determined, when I got back to Korea, that I would use the remaining months to try and make contact with Ji Yung before I left; regardless of what Ji Hoo had said, I needed to see her and to be sure that she was okay.

The morning of our flight back to Korea, Chanelle got a phone call from the front desk. She left rather quickly, I assumed, to meet Anthony before we left the island. She came back an hour or so later, with a very suspicious look on her face.

“Sooooooooo. How is Anthony? Are you two going to keep in contact? Should I start planning the wedding?”  I joked.

Chanelle, totally unphased by my question, looked in my direction and quietly mentioned that Anthony wanted to see me. A little curious, but mostly uncertain, I went down stairs and met Anthony in the lobby.

“Please sit down.” He courteously gestured to a seat across from his.

“Would you like some tea?”

I politely nodded. We waited for my cup of tea, politely making remarks on the weather and the beauty of Jeju. After the waiter brought my tea, Anthony got right to the heart of the matter:

“So, I’ve been informed by a couple of people that you’ve taken a liking to Ji Yung, Ji Hoo’s younger sister.” Anthony set his cup down.

 “But, before we continue, I would really like to hear your side of the story, Kara. Just to be sure that my assumptions about you are correct.”

I explained everything. How I came to meet Ji Yung. How we came to know one another in the hospital. How Mr. Park had reacted to me, and why I had asked to see her again.

Anthony smiled.

“That’s exactly what I’ve heard from others. Please understand I just needed to be sure…”

“So, can you help me see her?” I desperately needed to know now. If Anthony could help me, it would mean I’d get to see Ji Yung before I left; I could be at peace with this crazy experience, and go home satisfied.

“Well, that mostly depends on you.”  He leaned back in his chair.

“Mr. Park and his family,” he began, “….have a complicated history. That’s why they are, the way they are. Their indignation for people is learned…and rightfully so, I dare say. Ji Yung is very innocent, and fragile, as you might have gathered from the time you spent with her. As her oppa, I feel obligated to her to make sure she’s happy and content…and that the people in her life have her best interest at heart…”

Though he was being a little vague about things, I started to understand the situation a little more…at least from Anthony’s perspective.

“Chanelle tells me that you plan on heading back to the states soon, to start a new job?”

He stopped, expecting a response from me. I told him my plans and happily disclosed my thoughts on my experiences in Korea.

“Well you see….that is the problem. I want you to see Ji Yung again. She’s missed you. She’s often asked about an ‘eonnie’ which, I’m assuming, would be you. But, again, I as I stated earlier, I must also be concerned and protective of Ji Yung’s well being. What Ji Yung really needs, Kara, is someone that will be a constant presence in her life; not someone who will stop by to appease their emotional curiosity and then leave the country, never to be seen again.”

I sat forward, in shock, but let him continue.

“I would be willing, however, to arrange a meeting with Ji Yung, as long as you agreed to do it regularly…for an extended period of time.”

“I’m sorry, Anthony, I don’t quite understand….”

“It’s quite simple,” he interrupted, “Renew your contract with your teaching agency, so I can be sure you’ll be staying in the country for at least another year, and I will arrange a meeting with Ji Yung as long as you agree to meet her once a week afterwards…if she desires.”

I sat in silence for a moment, half-heartedly reviewing his conditions.

“Look Anthony, I just…I don’t understand….why should I change my life for her? Why should I…”

He stopped me. “That’s understandable, Kara.” He leaned forward and wished me luck in my future endeavors, excused himself from the table and walked away.

“Emotional curiosity.”

It almost sounded demeaning. Was that all it was, though? Had I been selfishly seeking to meet with Ji Yung just to appease some of my own demons before I left Korea for good?

Our flight back from Jeju was quiet. Chanelle slept, and I just sat up thinking about my conversation with Anthony….about Ji Hoo, and about how I could possibly have rationalized meeting Ji Yung for such selfish reasons.

Before the flight was over, I determined that I would keep my plans to return home. After all, how could I logically rationalize staying in Korea for Ji Yung? We hadn’t seen or spoke to one another in ages, anyway.  And she had her lavish, beautiful life to live…without me. I had done my part. I protected her and I helped her find her way back to her family.

That would have to be enough…for both of us.